Where Am I Going To?
by Shadow131
Summary: AU Finally accepting the way things are, Luke still has pleanty of questions, and he's on a hunt for answers. But when it means straightening his priorities, he's still going to have to sift through a lifetime of pain and lies. FINISHED! ANH to ROTJ R&R P
1. Prologue

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Prologue**

The small, cramped transport had taken off from Alderaan toward Tatooine without a hitch. At first, the smuggled passengers had remained safe, until the Imperial vessel had stumbled upon them. The co-pilot was more than a little trigger happy, and, out of nerves, had accidentally begun firing on the enormous ship. The Imperials, more than a little enraged, had started firing back, demanding identification. The small ship had begun trying to make a run for it, but that was about as successful as trying to cheat death. Most of the passengers were in a panic, except one.

The man, just around middle aged, wore a long, brown cassock. As many passengers had, he'd attempted to flee via an escape pod, but they'd all been jettisoned by the time he and his small bundle reached one. Instead, he'd settled into the back, keeping his head, and remaining calm, while he hummed to and rocked the small thing in his arms.

The child, who was approaching his first birthday, had been woken up by the barrage of firing, and was growing more than a little fussy. The man knew all too well how deadly his temper tantrums were, and he was doing his best to sooth the child. Reaching out through the Force, he touched the little boy's mind, which surprised the child as he stared up, wide eyed. He cooed slightly at the sensation, and had stopped his crying.

_It's okay. I won't let anything happen to you, _the man told the boy via the Force, and whilst the child might not understand the words, the sound of the man's voice comforted him, and he blinked his eyes in a sleepy manner.

_I won't let anything happen to you…..I promised your mother that._

However, the man was getting increasingly more worried on how well he could keep that promise, as a grating noise alerted him to the fact they were being boarded. Storm Troopers he could fight and distract easily enough, but to what end? How on earth would he find a vessel to Tatooine? And with a baby?

The man silently crept through the fear inspired crowd and as far back into the ship as he could go. A few moments later, blaster fire enlightened to him the presence of Imperial troops. The boy began to cry, and the man's grip on him tightened, humming soft, sweet words to try and calm him. He had begun trying to figure out ways he could possibly rescue them from this situation, when the remarkable occurred.

At once, the man sensed one specific being from across the ship, could feel the signature mark of power as it entered the captured vessel. And, in turn, this second party sensed him as well.

Anxiously, the man hushed the child, rocking him, before standing up, and carefully tucking the child where he had been sitting. His arms now free, the man unclipped a lightsaber from his belt, wrapping his hands around it with a firm grip, nervousness and adrenalin coursing through his veins. The door to the room he'd hidden in opened, and Darth Vader appeared as a silhouette, his own lightsaber already in his hands, but not ignited.

"Kenobi," came the deep, soft snarl.

The man, Obi-Wan Kenobi, said nothing, merely inclined is head slightly in a sort of affirmative gesture.

"I've been waiting for this day for a long time," continued Vader. "The day you die."

"You'll have to wait a little longer," replied the Jedi, his voice firm, not in the least bit afraid.

Wordlessly, the Lord of the Sith ignited his bloody red blade, and Kenobi followed suit with his darker blue.

_Flash!_

The two opponents were locked in combat, swift strokes adding intense hums to the air. Block, step, dodge, strike. They repeated the pattern several times, like an intricate dance. In the midst of the fighting, the little child had begun to cry, distracting the Jedi, who looked sharply in the boy's direction.

"Luke!" The cry was soft, and yet more than audible enough for the Jedi's opponent to hear. Vader seized the opportunity while his enemy was distracted to make a strike. Obi-Wan only just had time to duck and return the blow, only he didn't miss. The Dark Lord snarled as Kenobi's lightsaber managed to score against his arm, and while he was slightly weakened by the pain, the Jedi used the moment to knock the Sith Lord aside, slamming him into the wall as he raced to the boy – Luke – and quickly scooped him up, protecting him determinedly.

Vader, hissing at the pain in his arm, clutched at it with one hand as he regained his balance, watching Obi-Wan, astounded.

"I ought to of known….You, of all people…Of course you'd be the hypocrite out of all the Jedi."

Kenobi glared at his adversary but did not respond, holding the baby even closer to him, rocking back and forth on his heels. Using the Force, he tried to sooth him again, and that only slightly slowed the boy's tears. The Jedi stroked back the soft, blond hair, looking pleadingly into the ice blue eyes to stop crying. Obi-Wan wanted to put him back down, afraid that Darth Vader might try and strike at him while he held Luke in his arms, but Vader seemed to be in enough pain that he could only goad Kenobi on for a moment.

"Funny, he doesn't look like you," continued the Lord of the Sith, watching the Jedi slowly lower the bundle again. "So, tell me, Obi-Wan: Who was the little bastard's mother?"

Kenobi did not rise to the bait, which only strengthened the Dark Lord's anger. He recovered from the wound enough to begin striking back at his adversary again. All the while, the Dark Lord of the Sith tried to invade the Jedi's mind, partially to prove to him he was stronger, and then so he could flaunt the stolen information in Obi-Wan's face.

"You suffer from the mistaken impression," huffed Darth Vader as he blocked another attack, "that you can keep things hidden from me." He managed to knock down the mental wall in Kenobi's mind, forcing the Jedi to his knees with a cry. However, the information he found sent him reeling back in shock, hurt, surprise.

_Padmè Amidala Skywalker. _

For close to a minute he could not recover as Obi-Wan managed to struggle back up to his feet. Hateful anger rushed through him as he charged Kenobi again. The fighting more fierce than ever, Vader shouted questions at the Jedi, and when no reply was given, managed to force his way back into his mind.

"So!" he demanded. "How long were you both betraying me? How long did you sleep with her behind my back?"

He found what he wanted inside the mind once more, but it wasn't as he'd expected: Obi-Wan was not the boy's – this Luke's – father. More could not be revealed, as Storm Troopers had rushed down the hall way, about ready to fire.

"Stun! Stun!" the Lord of the Sith shouted. "I want him alive!"

Kenobi hesitated for a crucial second. If he turned his back on the Dark Lord, he was vulnerable. But if he didn't turn to try and block the attacks from the Storm Troopers, he would be anyway. In the end he chose neither option, and managed to barrel past the Dark Lord of the Sith and back to the baby, as though he could somehow protect and escape with him, despite the present situation. He had just picked the boy up when the stun blast hit him, and he fell to the floor, Luke still clutched in his arms.

The baby was screaming now, not liking the noise, not liking the fact that the person holding him had fallen, and missing his voice both vocally and through the Force. Awkwardly, Darth Vader had pried the boy from the stiff, frozen fingers; Even when stunned the Jedi attempted to fulfill his promise to Padmè. Vader instructed the Storm Troopers to take Obi-Wan back to the ship. The looming, black figure that now held him frightened Luke all the more, and the screaming continued, irking the Lord of the Sith. When verbal commands and slightly more gentle hushes failed in silencing the baby, the Dark Lord did as Kenobi had done, and reached out with the Force to calm the boy.

Confused, the tears ceased instantaneously, making the Dark Lord of the Sith wonder if Luke were merely crying because he could, not because the fighting had upset him. The baby had stopped because he noted instantaneously the vast difference between when the soft man spoke in his head and when the black man spoke in his head: Light, sweet, comforting. Dark, heavy, intoxicating. In his confusion, the boy began to whimper again, as though having to decide which he liked better. In the end, Luke seemed to have chosen the former, because he was crying once more. However, when Darth Vader entered his thoughts a second time, the baby stopped crying instantaneously, as though he now had to decide all over again, and the Dark was becoming increasingly more attractive. Finally, the boy gave up, and snuggled slightly against the black man. He wasn't as warm as the soft man, but Luke was tired, hiccupping absently, and he was quite willing to make due with whatever resource was handed to him.

The captain of the Star Destroyer couldn't help but give Vader a bit of an odd look as he walked onto the deck with a baby in his arms. However, he was more than smart enough to know better than to question whatever it was that the Lord of the Sith was doing, and instead began making arrangements for the imprisonment of the Jedi, who was still unconscious. The Dark Lord ordered that he was not to be disturbed, and disappeared into his room silently, the boy still clinging to him.

…

It was the most awkward sight in at least three systems: the Dark Lord of the Sith was tenderly – if awkwardly – balancing Luke on one leg while softly humming to him, trying to draw a little blood with a small needle. Anyone would have gawked at the astounding sight of Darth Vader – second most feared creature in the galaxy – and the little baby, who looked entirely pure and innocent.

Vader had managed to catch the wiggling boy's hand, and pierced the tip of one finger with the needle, gently pressing a few drops onto a glass slide. Luke's face scrunched up, and he began to whimper, which the Lord of the Sith knew was followed only by tears. He began to sweat a little as he desperately tried to stop the process before it began. Uncomfortably, he bounced the little bundle on his knee, and any tears on the verge of coming free instantly stopped as the baby giggled.

The Dark Lord pressed the slide into the computer, initiating the DNA sequencing program as he bandaged the small cut on the boy's finger. "Well, young – What did Obi-Wan call you? Luke? Yes, that sounds about right. Well, young Luke, let's see who my treacherous bitch of a wife slept with behind my back to produce you, hm?"

Luke cooed slightly, and took a great interest in trying to catch hold of the Dark Lord of the Sith's cape. Darth Vader held it out of reach until he pushed the baby to the brink of frustration, and the boy began to cry again. He handed the boy the cloth, so long as it would shut him up. A mother, of course, would know better than to indulge the child's whims; Vader would only spoil him that way. But the Lord of the Sith knew next to nothing on how to raise a child, and had very few parental instincts, if any at all.

The computer beeped that it was done with the scan, and the Dark Lord tore his eyes from the sight of Luke entertaining himself with the cape and back to the computer screen. It was the first time he had smiled beneath that mask – a real smile, not corrupted by black triumph – in a long time.

The day's surprises were clearly not over yet, and the Dark Lord of the Sith stopped breathing temporarily at what the computer had to tell him. Oh, yes, he was the son of Padmè Amidala, alright. But he was also the son of Anakin Skywalker. Darth Vader scooped the laughing boy up in his gloved hands and held him so their eyes were level, and just stared at him. Luke, more confused than ever, began to squirm a little; he wanted down.

"So….." breathed Vader, settling the baby into his lap. "You're my…..I'm your….."

The boy didn't have the slightest idea what the black man was talking about, and really didn't care, because he yawned and blinked sleepily. Well, he had had a rather large day, after all.

_Why didn't Padmè tell me? _Thought the Lord of the Sith, staring at the boy. No wonder he didn't look like Kenobi, then! He had his father's hair, his father's eyes, his father's nose. His mother's more delicate frame – had he been that small as a baby? – but he was absolutely entirely his father's little boy. The Dark Lord brushed against Luke's mind, startling him. Yes, his father's power with the Force, that was there, too. He was strong, very strong indeed.

"The Emperor's not going to like you…." he hummed, stroking back the soft, gold hair with a gloved hand. A surge of parental love threatened to overpower the Dark Lord of the Sith, a completely unknown feeling up until that moment. He had to protect _his _boy, his Luke….

Luke Skywalker….Force, who would have ever guessed?

Maybe, just maybe, he could convince his master to let him raise and train the boy. He was powerful, that was easy to ascertain. A new Lord of the Sith, what an idea! Well, he was born to it after all.

He was his father's son.

…

The day had started off badly. Well, more of an understatement, really. Not having the faintest idea on how to care for a baby, he'd put Luke in the charge of a few officers. Upon awakening in the morning, he was told by these same officers that somehow the Jedi had escaped in the night. The guards didn't have a single memory of it. This was enough to send Darth Vader into a rage. Should have killed Obi-Wan then and there, gotten it over with, none of this waiting business! The idea of torture had been an alluring one, but he shouldn't have given in to it, even if he did have quite a score to settle with Kenobi. He would have Force chocked the officers, but he needed them to help him with his son.

Now there was an odd thought: His son.

Their purpose for living only barely established, they guarded young Luke with their lives. If they let one tear fall from his little blue eyes, they were terrified it would be their necks. Thusly, little Luke was more than happy, spoiled every single day of his journey toward Coruscant. Vader noted with surprise, and not a little relish, that he was always happiest when it was his father holding him, or paying him attention, and the Lord of the Sith made sure to do so often.

The nearer they got to Coruscant, the more nervous the Dark Lord became. If Palpatine simply didn't want that child in the scheme of things, he'd kill him. Luke was a baby, it would be easy. Privately, the thought of his son dying became more horrifying to Lord Vader every day. Not just because he was Force sensitive. Well, he was far more than sensitive, that was becoming increasingly obvious. But, well, he was starting to get rather attached to the little child, who had long since ceased to be afraid of him. That was more than he could say for most, since, generally, people trembled when he was near. But not Luke. Luke very happily laughed and cooed around the black man, liked to be bounced on his knee – which the Dark Lord of the Sith made sure to do only rarely. The closer a bond he forged with his son, the more terrified he became at the prospect of having to give him up.

But he had to bow to the inevitable, and when they landed on Coruscant, he could only put off seeing the Emperor for a day.

"Well, what do you think?" he'd asked the boy, who had found the most fascinating pen lying on the floor. Darth Vader gently pried it from his fingers when Luke began to chew on it. He couldn't possibly have started teething already, could he? When did babies start teething anyway? "Do you think this is our last day together?" Luke wasn't listening, as he had started to cry. He was quick to learn that this usually got him what he wanted, but not so with Vader, who simply watched the sobbing form resolutely. "I'm not giving it back. Get over it," he instructed. The wailing continued, and the Lord of the Sith finally picked his son up off the floor and cradled him in his arms. This hushed the boy a little, but he still really wanted that pen.

Hey, it was shiny, after all.

"I'm trying to talk to you about your possible death and all you can think about is a writing utensil?" The response was a sad look with Luke's big, blue eyes, wet with tears. "That isn't going to work. You don't know where that thing's been." Frankly, Luke really didn't care where it had been. He was more interested in where it was now. The Dark Lord chuckled, and would have given his son a kiss on the forehead, were it not for the mask.

Which was Kenobi's fault. Just like it was Kenobi's fault he hadn't even known he'd had a son.

The Dark Lord of the Sith settled for petting the baby's hair with affection, before bedding the boy down for the night.

…

Lord Vader's master did not fail to notice the possessiveness with which his Right Hand held the little boy. That alone was not a good sign. But Darth Vader was not exactly known for his tender behavior, so Palpatine endeavored to keep a somewhat objective eye over the situation. He was told what had happened with the Jedi, told that Luke showed a gift for the Force, and it was subtly hinted that he would make a powerful Sith Lord when he grew up.

The Emperor liked keeping people on a leash. It was entertaining to watch them squirm. That was why he refrained from telling Vader the baby's fate long after he'd already decided it.

"It appears, Lord Vader, that you have a new apprentice. I will expect you to train him well, and bring him before me every so often so I might test and examine him."

The Lord of the Sith bowed low, very low. Far more near to the ground than he usually did, and replied with "Yes, my Master," before stalking out of the room, the boy still clutched in his black arms.

…

You can't really be four years old already, can you? No, I only just fought Obi-Wan yesterday. Maybe the day before at the most. How is it that you're walking and talking already?

And how can a four year old be so powerful with the Force?

Well, that one is easy enough to explain: You're _my _boy, that's why. It's as simple as that. You were born to it. And you like that, I can tell. You like seeing things fly off the walls when you have a temper tantrum. You like being able to manipulate things with the Force. You even succeeded in confusing a Storm Trooper the other day using a mind trick.

Not that it's really difficult to confuse a Storm Trooper.

Yes, the Dark Side flows through you, and you use every single opportunity you get to show that off. Soon, you'll be old enough to start lightsaber training.

How did you grow up so fast? Wasn't I just trying to keep you from chewing on everything you got your little hands on? When did you change?

I know it's not easy for you, growing up destined to be a Sith Lord. I think you try and hide your occasional disappointment, and you do a good job, but you're forgetting something: I'm your father, I can tell.

I can't bounce you on my knee, I'll look weak. I can't tell you bed time stories, that's showing too much affection. That's dangerous. Remaining safely objective is easier, because neither of us will be as hurt in the end. So, instead, we're hurting now.

You asked me about your mother again today. You're getting steadily more persistent about asking that. Ask away, I still won't tell you. That's something we're better off not talking about.

Before that you asked why I needed a respirator, and I told you the truth. The lava, the fight, Kenobi. You reacted darkly to that, declared you now hated all Jedi, and especially Obi-Wan Kenobi, and would someday get revenge for me. You made me very proud, just then. The Jedi would have killed to have you on their side, the weaker side. Now they ought to shiver, because they've made an enemy out of you. Not that there are any Jedi left anyway. Obi-Wan's probably dead by now. Too bad. I would have liked to have seen you kill him.

You're constantly looking for my approval, making sure you did everything just so. I can tell you hang on the words "That was very good." They're the highest form of praise I can give you. Can you sense the emotion that's boiling beneath them? I'd pet and coddle and praise you if I could, Force knows I would.

But do you know? That's the million credit question.

I can't tell you I love you, that's hardest of all. I can't show you, I can't tell you. You're supposed to pick up on it by some divine influence of your own. Whether you do or not is entirely subject to debate.

But I do love you. Do you know that?

**To Be Continued…..**


	2. Part 1 Chapter 1

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter One**

One of the Rebel's blasts found their target, causing the Star Destroyer to rock ever so slightly. Luke, standing, rocked on the balls of his feet, shutting off his lightsaber temporarily. The remote he'd been training with ceased moving once it noted that the lightsaber was off. Despite the severity of the blow – for an Alliance weapon, anyway – Luke did not fall, or even stumble. He had a good sense of balance. He didn't know why. He just did.

Just one of those things that happened, he guessed.

He speculated that it really oughtn't be this difficult to capture such a puny little consulate ship. It was slightly more maneuverable than the Star Destroyer was, but the later had the advantage of speed and fire power. But, he was to gather, they didn't want to blow the ship to pieces, so only the speed applied.

Once the ship had stopped shaking, Luke raised his lightsaber again, and turned it back on. The remote hummed into life, and sent a small jolt his way. The Sith Lord deflected it with seventeen years of skill under his belt, and glanced at the robotic opponent with a bored look on his face. They really made these things too easy. He'd slice it in two if they weren't such a pain to replace.

But then, slicing it in two would be entertaining…..at least a little…..

Lord Skywalker decided better, and deflected a few more shots until he felt his father trying to speak to him through the Force. He paused a moment, and then ignored it.

_Luke, _came the slightly more insistent voice. With a smirk, he blocked it out entirely, feeling a wave of annoyed rage wash between the two Force users. Finally, Vader's voice broke through again. _Don't do that!_

_Then come in here and talk to me._

Luke had made it very clear that he wasn't going to have anymore Force conversations, or orders through the mind. At least for a little while. This had been decided after he'd asked about his mother for the millionth time since he was three, and been shot down once again. If Vader would relent and tell him something about his mother – the most he'd ever gotten was that she had tried to betray the Empire in some way or another – then he'd go back to talking with his father via the Force.

The door to Luke's room slammed open, and the eighteen year old glanced up to see his father, who was seething slightly. "Where did you get to be so stubborn?" he demanded, watching as Luke deflected another shot skillfully.

With a smirk, Lord Skywalker responded with "I'm my father's son, remember?"

"Unfortunately, I do remember." Luke was not quite as tall as his father, and had no real way of knowing if he resembled him. Occasionally he was told he did, but he never really knew. And that was the Jedi Kenobi's fault. However, like his father, he dressed completely in black, mostly because it made him look older, but did not wear a cape. They got in his way if he was trying to move quickly.

Luke gave a short little laugh, and struck against his opponent again.

"You're getting very good at that," praised his father, and the boy tried to decide whether he was bribing him, or actually praising him.

"That's because," replied the other, "these things are so easy. I put it on the highest setting I could, and I'm still bored out of my skull."

"You can talk to the Emperor about finding better challenges for your skill next time we're in Coruscant."

Lord Skywalker felt a small knot of revulsion and fear form at the base of his stomach, which always happened when he thought of his master. He still had vivid memories of his childhood, and his absolute terror when his father would take him to Coruscant. At the age of six he'd actually begged Vader not to make him go. The admission of horror had surprised the Lord of the Sith, and Luke had managed to bend his resolve, but in the end, he couldn't break it; he went. At the age of twelve he'd experienced his first brief exposure to Force Lightning and hadn't been in a hurry to repeat the process. That alone made him shiver.

He also hated visiting the Emperor because it meant prostrating himself in front of someone who, in his heart of hearts, he really didn't believe was all that more powerful than he was. Luke was a free spirit, he just wasn't content being locked up, or bowing before another person's will.

But visits to Coruscant did generally reap very nice rewards, so he always got over that small knot of fear. If Palpatine was pleased with what he'd been doing, then he was given more power, more responsibility, or just about whatever else he could think to want. An added bonus was more run ins with Mara Jade, the beautiful Emperor's Hand.

"Anyway," continued Vader, bringing Luke out of his train of thought. "We've caught the ship, and are preparing to board it. Are you coming?"

Lord Skywalker gave it a thought. Well, it was something to do, and his boredom on board the Star Destroy was becoming suffocating. "The plans for the Death Star are on board?"

"They should be, with Princess Leia Organa guarding them."

Luke never really would have thought that the Alderaanian princess would be a rebel, but it was undeniably true. Thinking about it, he might have said hello to her…..once. Yeah, once, that sounded about right. And maybe goodbye, having only met her a grand total of possibly five times on stops in Alderaan, and the very, very, _very _few meetings of the Senate he attended, just out of curiosity. The last time had been about three years ago, she was fifteen, and caught in the most awkward stage of adolescence known to human species, so his impression with her was not entirely high. A pretty good orator, but that's about all he noticed.

Lord Skywalker strapped his lightsaber back onto his belt, shrugging. "Sure, why not? It'll be amusing."

"I'm not inviting you for your amusement," stressed the Sith Lord. "I want those plans back."

"And you'll have them," assured his son, walking slightly behind him as they left young Skywalker's room. "What can the Alliance do, anyway? They're just a bunch of ragtag 'pilots,' in X-Wings. Give me a TIE Fighter, I'll take 'em out."

"Your skill as a pilot is astounding, no one can deny that, but don't underestimate an enemy."

"But, Father," protested the boy, "this is the first sort of edge they've ever had, and it is minimal at that. They can't possibly formulate an attack on the Death Star and hope to win."

But it made Luke seriously think….Well, they couldn't, could they? The Alliance was a minor thorn in their side. Unfortunately, it was so small that they were having a hard time locating it in order to extract the nuisance. Well, they'd just have to wait and see what happened. Sometimes thorns worked themselves out.

…

Luke had been interrogating a few rebel officers on board the Alliance vessel when Storm Troopers brought forth the consulate ship's ambassador. She was not quite as tall as young Skywalker, but she walked with a proud sort of height. Her head held high, her brown hair was swept into to buns tightly twisted on each side of her head and her chocolate brown eyes flashed with an independent sort of fire. Lord Skywalker almost didn't recognize the girl.

There was no way that she could possibly be Princess Leia Organa. Three years was not enough time for a human being to metamorphosis into a butterfly…. Was it? Maybe so, for the Lord of the Sith could only just barely cover his shock, his jaw dropping slightly. No, it wasn't Organa. It was some other girl, that was for certain. Intrigued all the same, he came behind his father's shoulder and watched the exchange.

"Darth Vader," she snarled in her smooth, _charming _voice. "I should have known. Only you could be so bold." But….It wasn't possible! The Alderaanian Princess? _Charming, _of all things? But it _was_ her, beyond any shadow of a doubt. She sent him a quick glare that was well mixed with confusion, mostly because Luke couldn't stop gawking. What was _he _staring at? "The Imperial Senate will not sit still for this. When they hear you've attacked a diplomatic-"

Vader quickly cut her off, and Lord Skywalker was inwardly struck with the most curious thought and feeling. "What? No, don't start talking! Let her keep talking!" His heart was knocking at his ribs, his palms had begun to sweat, and he balled them, planting them firmly at his sides. What on earth was the matter with him?

"Don't act so surprised Your Highness." Young Skywalker tuned out most of the conversation in order to nurse his sudden wave of thoughts. He caught onto the most important details about the transmissions, and listened intently to when Princess Organa was talking, but otherwise, ignored it all broodingly. He snapped fully to attention when his father shouted "You are a part of the Rebel Alliance and traitor! Take her away!" and watched out of the corner of his eye in a slightly wistful manner. He nearly volunteered to follow, in case….well, in case of what? What could possibly happen? That's why he didn't do it. It would only make him look even more stupid than he felt at the moment.

Half heartedly he followed his father and interrogated a few more officers, but otherwise remained dead to the world.

_What's the matter? _Vader echoed in his son's head, and the long silence reminded him that Luke would only speak verbally. However, he soon realized that the reply was delayed for a few moments not from a grudge, but because the boy didn't know how to say it.

_….Nothing, _came the reply, which alerted Lord Vader to the fact that everything was wrong. He hadn't really had much time to notice his son's attitude towards the princess, but he could easily pick up on the sudden change in emotional state; confusion mostly, nervousness, anxiousness, shock, curiosity, and a very slight glimmer of something Vader was reluctant to name. Love came to mind, but that was highly unlikely. Passion? Hm, that seemed to describe it better. Whatever that glimmer was, it didn't matter, as the emotions were off the scale in strength, and rolled as constantly as a tide.

_Nothing? _He finally asked again. He could feel Luke struggle, could still sense the boy's shock at the sudden change in his own physic.

_I don't really know, _was the final response, and he sighed broodingly. Whatever it was, it was bothering Lord Skywalker greatly, and he wanted very much to try and figure out what had just happened to him.

**To Be Continued….**

Hey, everyone. Well, by popular demand, here's the first official chapter. I don't really like how it came out, but it was late, my neck is hurting the hell out of me, and I really didn't have much time. I'm endeavoring to get as much done as possible before I leave for the east coast on Friday, so if these first few chapters are a little choppy, I greatly apologize. But, that's right: No updates for at least eight days.

Looking over it, I couldn't find anything specifically _bad _about this piece, I just felt like I was missing something…..But I couldn't find any place to add anything, so I give it to you as it is. And now, to answer all the wonderful reviews you've been sending me:

Luke1: I was slightly reluctant to type this out for that specific reason, but I'm pretty confident I didn't do too badly. Thank you very much for the praise, it is intensely flattering!

Schnickledooger: Heh thanks. You don't need to suck up, really. I may just sort of let it flop for a couple of months when I get busy with other works (the numerous unfinished fics I have prove this point sufficiently) but I'm more than likely not going to let it die. I have a specific direction to go in, and that really helps. Glad you liked it.

Anthestria: Wow, thank you! I'm glad I could write something that not only met with approval but was also given favoritism! Awesome.

Mixza: Yeah, I liked the last line too.

Doreen: Thank you

xInuyashaxAngelx: Here ya are.

Preciousbabyblue: Will do


	3. Part 1 Chapter 2

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Two**

Luke had managed to excuse himself from the room as the torture droid approached the princess, and his father coolly snarled "And now, princess, we shall discuss the location of your hidden rebel base."

He knew he could do absolutely nothing to actually stop the torture. Being a rebel, she was getting her just deserts, but that didn't really make Lord Skywalker any easier. Hours passed, and he just stood outside the door, kicking his heels against the wall, waiting, waiting, waiting. His head perked up when his father stormed out of the room, enraged. He brushed against his mind with the Force first before reaching out and touching his arm.

"Father?" Luke asked softly, and he could feel some of Vader's rage dissipate slightly. "Let me talk to her."

There was a brief stand off of sorts as the two simply watched each other, before Lord Skywalker inwardly begged _Father, please, _and Darth Vader nodded.

"Good luck," he added sarcastically before sweeping down the hall. Even with the granted permission, Luke waited a few minutes, drawing in a few good breaths before entering the room.

He could feel emotions rolling off of her as she sat up on the bench of her cell, glaring cold fire at him: Pain, fear, sorrow, despair…..Well, those would be easy enough to manipulate, but he wanted them to stew a little with the newly added feelings; confusion, curiosity.

Lord Skywalker paced the room briefly, his eyes constantly on her, just watching, whilst she in turn watched back. At great length, he said "We've met before, you know."

She didn't nod – mostly because her whole body ached – but replied with a firm "I know."

"May we dispense with the formalities? I'll just call you Leia, you just call me Luke." He paused as he watched her dissolve the new tidbit, as confusing as it was. "Simple."

After a moment, the princess asked "Why? Why are you doing this? If you think I'll tell you where the rebels are, you're sadly mistaken."

"I'm not out to get you," he replied, wishing there was another chair, wanting to be on eye level with her. "I don't want to be your enemy, I don't like seeing you tortured."

"Then don't watch."

"You don't have to go through this. I can stop it all right now, and no one would say a thing. All you need to do is give me the location, that's all they want."

"They want?"

"That's what I said."

"And what about you? What do you want?"

Lord Skywalker fumbled, flushed slightly. "Uhh….I'm not sure I understand the question." Untrue. He knew _exactly _what he wanted, but he was going to have to be patient.

Princess Leia didn't believe him, and leaned back against the wall slightly. She was extremely tired, but more than willing to keep the conversation going as long as it was necessary.

"Why should I believe anything any of you tell me? If I give you what you want to know, what's to stop you from killing me?"

"My word of honor."

"I repeat: What's to stop you from killing me."

The barb struck, and Luke was trying very hard to keep his anger in check, made more difficult by the fact he was constantly told to never hold back his anger; it made him powerful. But he didn't want powerful in that type of situation. Powerful wouldn't earn her trust, which was what he needed.

He gently motioned for her to move over on the bench, and sat down next to her, turned to look her in the eyes, her big, brown eyes. "I swear, I won't let them harm a hair on your head."

She blinked, and, strangely enough, believed him.

"Just give them the name," he continued, "and you can have a nice, comfortable room, good food, rest, relaxation."

"And my friends will die," she spit back.

"What do you care about that?" he demanded. "Are your friends the ones being tortured now? Are they suffering to save you?"

"That isn't the point! The point is to stand up for what you believe in, for what is right."

"Someone has to get burned in the end."

"Ah, so it's better you than me?"

"Well, why not?" She stared at him in total disbelief. "It's survival of the fittest. Their sacrifice means you live to see another day."

She scoffed. "One bad turn deserves another?"

"In not so many words, yes."

She glared coldly and shook her head. "How do you sleep at night?"

Lord Skywalker blinked, confused by the question. Well, he just sort of laid down, and closed his eyes, and went unconscious…..Was that really a question you were supposed to answer?

"You're not like any person I've ever met before, Leia…..It's actually rather attractive."

"I'm not sure if I'm flattered or not," she said, scooting slightly away from him, still glaring.

"You won't say, then?"

"Did you really expect me to do otherwise?"

He shrugged. "More like hoped, really."

"Why are you doing this?" she demanded again. "What do you possibly have to gain by it? What's in it for you?"

He took her hand, which shocked her, and spoke very softly and gently, which amazed her. "I don't want to see you get hurt." He waited for the astonishment to subside a little before continuing. "I can get you out of this, I really can. I'm Darth Vader's son, I'm second in line to the Imperial Throne, I think I can work a princess out of prison." Her amazement became disbelief, and had not yet worked its way through to comprehension. "All you have to do is a few simple things."

"Betray the rebels, and….?"

"And agree to marry me."

The disbelief remained for a long moment before become rage. "You're joking."

"I'm quite serious."

"That is most definitely the oddest way I have ever been proposed to, and I do not accept!"

He gave her hand a small squeeze, and shrugged. "I'm not asking you to fall in love with me. Who knows, that may follow. But you're just so different, and so….." Was there even a word for it? "Stunning," well, that sounded pretty good, "that I can't get you out of my head, I'm tripping over my own feet. That's never happened before, and I don't want it to stop. Look," he said, sighing slightly, "think it over. I could be good for you, you know. Second in line to the throne, think about it. I can give you everything you could possibly want. Money, luxuries, even power….." He was whispering in a beguiling manner, really causing her to think. "Just imagine it, the entire universe at your fingertips. And all you have to do is say 'yes.'" He stood up now, releasing her hand and striding to the door. "I'll let you think about that for a while, unless you want my father to interrogate you again."

Stunned, Leia had shrunk against the wall, staring out into nothing, causing Luke to feel a smirk tug at the edge of his lips. He could feel her resolve weakening; he had the rebels now. And possibly more importantly, he had her.

Something inside him drew him to her, called, and bellowed, and whispered. A piece of his soul felt more complete around her, though previously he'd never felt incomplete. If he had, it had gone unnoticed up to that point. He didn't want the feeling of being whole to leave. He didn't want to let her go, seeing as he had as much right to her as anyone, and probably more so. After all, he was a powerful Lord of the Sith, she was a princess, a smart match by any means. He wanted her because she was different, something totally new that had never been presented to him before.

He wanted her because he was desperately lonely.

Lord Skywalker was convinced that fate had handed him this opportunity on a silver platter; end the Rebellion, and end the loneliness. End the gapping, raw wound that had so long been a part of him. And damn anyone that tried to stop him.

Acting on impulse, he crossed back to her and kissed her hand, which she quickly snatched back, disgusted, and glaring daggers. He couldn't help but smirk at that. Her fiery temper was another thing that drove him to her; someone who wouldn't lay down and cower at his feet, but could and would fight him blow for blow. How wonderfully unusual!

"Have a nice evening, princess," he said, bowing slightly mockingly to the floor before sweeping out of the room, entirely satisfied. He had probably shaken her up more than the torture did.

…

Lord Vader was convinced that it was nothing more than an infatuation. Brief, that would soon pass. Unless, of course, it didn't. That wasn't a possibility he was entirely sure he wanted to think on.

He wasn't worried because his son had a little crush, mostly because he could tell his son didn't have a little crush. He had a passion that was making his heart rattle in his rib cage and made his mouth go entirely dry of words. Brushing against Luke's mind, he noted that most of the desperation was gone, replaced by a smug sort of certainty. What was he playing at? What had he hoped to accomplish with the princess? It went far beyond simply locating the plans to the Death Star and the hidden rebel base. Maybe he should talk with him about it?

Or maybe not. After all, if he could marry a Queen from Naboo, it only made too much sense that Lord Skywalker would set his sights on a Princess of Alderaan. A lust for royalty seemed to run in the Skywalker blood, for better and for worse. Darth Vader very, _very _rarely allowed his thoughts to drift to his wife. He didn't want his son to go through that pain. But the pain had reaped rewards, as he learned all pain did; He had a son.

Even if he did talk to Luke on the subject, he wouldn't listen. Young men in love never listen to anything but their hearts and hormones. But then, Luke was a smart boy, he had a good head on his shoulder, he might do fine on his own. Probably not, but he might.

In the end, Vader decided to leave events entirely alone unless Luke brought them to his attention. If it did upset the Emperor, which he highly doubted it would, he could claim innocence, and be truthful….for the most part.

However, he would keep an eye on things, just incase Luke did screw up somehow, which he was more than likely to do.

His little boy had grown up….Well, here's to grandchildren!

**To Be Continued…**

xInuyashaxAngelx: You're welcome

preciousbabyblue: I think the chapter answers the question

Doreen: Thanks! I found a couple of typos after posting, but that's always the way, isn't it?

Schnickledooger: You'll just have to wait and see! (Yes, I am evil)


	4. Part 1 Chapter 3

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Three**

When it was brought to Vader's attention that an escape pod had been jettisoned during the fighting, he was convinced the plans to the Death Star were on it. He quickly ordered that it be traced to its point of landing. However, he couldn't repress a shudder at the fact that it was on Tatooine.

Tatooine. He'd never, ever wanted to go back there. The memories haunted him when he slept, and he knew he'd never be able to drive them fully from him. They would forever be a part of the countless demons that troubled him.

He could just send down Storm Troopers, and…..No, they were bound to screw up somehow. He needed someone he could trust not to do something completely idiotic. However, he didn't know too many people like that.

Well, Luke would have to do.

…

"I want you to go down to Tatooine and find that escape pod. The plans _must _have been aboard," the Lord of the Sith instructed his son.

Luke was quickly protesting. "Oh, but, Father-"

"This is important, Luke," he stressed, ignoring objection. "I'm sending you down because I know you'll get the job done."

"But Tatooine? It's hot, and dust, and dirty, and-"

"All you have to do is go down and bring the plans back. Simple-"

"-And it's run by gangsters, and only the very scum of the galaxy are going to be found there. I don't want to-"

"-Do I make myself clear?"

"-Now's not a good time!"

"Luke!" That was an order. Glowering, the young Lord of the Sith refused to look his father in the eye, arm's crossed over his chest. He mumbled something. Whether it was a protest of a comment the Dark Lord could not have said. "Now, where are you going for me?"

At great length, Lord Skywalker sighed "…..Tatooine…."

"And what will you do when you get there?"

"Find the plans to the Death Star and bring them back."

"Very good. You're leaving in an hour, so I suggest you get packing."

Luke could not suppress the wave of anger that radiated off of him, and he was glaring daggers at his father now. He really wanted to complain about how unfair it was, but Lords of the Sith didn't do that. It was childish, and Luke was certainly no longer a child.

"Yes, Father," he replied, swiftly turning on his heels and stalking out of the room.

…

The door to Princess Organa's cell opened with an audible "swish," and she sat up on the bench. She felt her stomach tighten when it was Lord Skywalker who walked into the room. She did not precisely want to see him. She didn't want to see him, his father, or any of the stupid lackeys they were controlling. She wanted to be left alone.

She wanted to go home.

This was looking increasingly less likely as the Lord of the Sith paced angrily around the tiny jail cell. He finally stopped, sighing and gazing at her with a look of…..devotion? Obsession? Leia really didn't know. She didn't _want _to know.

"I've got good news and bad news, Leia." How did he have the gall to just call her by her first name? Or propose to her, for that matter? It's not like they'd spent a lot of quality time in each other's company. It wasn't like she even really knew him, and vice versa. "The bad news," he continued, ignoring her contemptuous stare, "is that I'll be gone for a few days."

She raised an eyebrow. "I thought you said that was the bad news."

He glared, inwardly snarling. He really wanted to beat that superior look off her face, but didn't dare. "The good news," he carried on, completely ignoring her comment, "is that you have a little more time to think on my offer." His glance at her became a little shy, a bit more tender. "You have been thinking on it, I hope."

Leia looked away, not about to let him know that it actually was a sorely tempting offer. With that much power, she could do so much good…..But you can't do good with evil power, and you can't make a black stone white. Her very desire to do good would be what would drive her to accept, but that would quickly corrupt into a terrible, monstrous being, and that frightened her.

"I stick by what I said before," she finally said, glaring up at him again. "I refuse, and there's nothing you could say to make me change my mind."

Luke sighed, frustrated. "Fine. I'll let you think on it a little more. Now," he smirked, looking very superior. "May I have a goodbye kiss?"

"No!"

He laughed, before taking her hand – to her displeasure – and kissing it. "You're so cute. See you in a week or two." With that, he swept out of the room, laughing, his mood much improved.

…

_Note to self: Never, _ever _wear black on a planet that has two suns……_

The young Lord of the Sith was utterly miserable. Why he ever agreed to come down to the wretched dust ball of a planet known as Tatooine was utterly beyond him. Not only was his classic black attire hot, it was thick and uncomfortable. It was usually somewhat chilly on board the space shuttles, it was just what he always wore. But the thick clothes were entirely unsuitable for such an arid climate. The Storm Troopers did not fare much better, since their uniforms were bulky and substantial, but they didn't attract half as much of the heat as Lord Skywalker's did.

On top of that, he felt oddly sick. He didn't know why. A bug he'd caught, perhaps? He doubted that. He felt….like he was pounded flat and left to dry in some desolate portion of the desert. He felt as if he ought to be somewhere, but for the life of him, he couldn't figure out where. He felt like there was something missing…..Someone he ought to know, or something he ought to be doing.

_What I ought to be doing, _he reminded himself, _is finding the plans to the Death Star. Then I can get off this Force forsaken rock._

He sort of kicked his heels around in the sand, feeling as if this was an utter waste of his valuable time. Generally, when his father asked him to do something, it was something that involved a certain amount of skill, that Luke was especially able in handling. A discreet assassination, performing an execution, delivering a torture. But this? Digging in the sand for who knows what? It was insulting, that was what it was! He agreed that finding the plans was important, but it was a simple enough task that he oughtn't need to be there for it. So he just supervised the Storm Troopers as they did all the actual work, and he was only mildly amused when they brought him information that the escape pod had, in fact, had something in it. Tracks of a droid went off in the direction of what the locals called the Jundland wastes.

There it was again! That nauseating feeling, as if he'd been here before, or should have been, or….or maybe he was just loosing his mind.

"Alright. I'm….gonna go follow 'em," he explained to the Trooper who'd reported to him. "You guys just, uh….do whatever it is you do….."

"Should I assign an escort, sir?"

The Lord of the Sith rolled his eyes. "Please, I think I can handle a small droid."

"But, sir, this area is reportedly inhabited by-"

A glare from Lord Skywalker immediately silenced the Storm Trooper. Most people lived in fear that he might use the Force to chock him, but that was more his father's "shtick." It was useful on occasion, but he much preferred straight out hand to hand combat. Nothing was quite as thrilling as the hum of lightsabers, and he'd often had a few good duels against Mara Jade, but could never get his father to spar with him….

But Luke wasn't thinking about that. He was thinking that he just really, _really _wanted to be alone, to figure out why he felt so….flat. And so, he grabbed a bottle of water and started following the track.

Ten meters later, he stopped.

He was, literally, sick, and had to hold his head for a few minutes to wait for the world to stop spinning. He took a few steps away from where he'd just vomited, so the smell wouldn't make him even sicker. To be sick on a desert planet, of all places! Why couldn't that escape pod had landed someplace warm, tropical? Someplace as decidedly not like Tatooine as possible.

_Luke, tell Uncle, that if he gets a translator, be sure it speaks Bocce._

_It doesn't look like we'll have much of a choice, but I'll remind him._

_….But I was going into Tosche Station to pick up some power converters!_

_You can waste time with your friends after your chores are done._

What the…..? That wasn't a dream. It was a memory. Like something long ago forgotten that had suddenly returned into his life. Impossible! He'd never done or said anything like that. But still….the second voice….It was his, he knew that much. And the first and third one were so familiar that it almost seemed like….Like? Well, he wasn't sure. Maybe he shouldn't go off into the desert alone, not if he really was coming down with something. However, glancing over his shoulder, he decidedly did not want Storm Troopers for company. Well, here goes nothing.

**To Be Continued….**

Schnickledooger: Yes, I am, in fact, very cruel. All will be explained if you keep reading. Oh, and as flattering as it is to be bombarded with reviews to update…..I did give you fair warning I would be gone for a week-ish. My long absences are generally always explained.

xInuyashaxAngelx: Thank you!

preciousbabyblue: Now if I told you that, it wouldn't be a surprise, would it?

Luke1: Yes, you spelled it right. Thank you! That is _exactly _what I was going for! I'm so glad I could get that out there and it could be recognized.

Mixza: A lot of people seem to share that opinion.

Cyn Wraith: Well, she did say no. Twice now. Can't blame her, really.

saiyuki123: Thanks!


	5. Part 1 Chapter 4

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Four**

A few hours into his trek, Luke was obviously suffering from heat exhaustion. He'd guzzled all his water, he was delirious, stumbling around alone in the waste lands of the desert.

That's why he never realized that the Sandpeople knew he was there.

Fully awake and watered, Luke was a formidable enemy. In his present condition, however, he was nearly helpless. He only just sensed that something was stalking him, and had been about to unclip his lightsaber. By that time, it was far too late, and he'd only just barely been able to dodge an attack by a Tusken Raider. However, delusional, he fell over a protruding rock, crying out at the sickening crack that came from his rib cage. He'd nearly faded from consciousness when he heard the sudden howl like cry, saw the Sandpeople scatter in terror. Blinking, he tried to prop himself up, met with blinding pain.

A hooded figure approached, the shadow passing over Luke's face. And then was unconscious.

…

_A boy, standing on an outcropping of rock, watching the twin suns set….._

Luke awoke, shoving himself up in bed with one arm, only to hiss at the sudden pain. He let out a short little "Ah…." Before biting his lip. _Son of a-_

"Oh, so you're awake then!"

Luke's senses were fully restored, and he turned to where the voice had come from. Wait a second….. What the-

"You certainly gave me a bit of a scare, young man." He was _scolding _him! Lord Skywalker! Oh, wait, he got it. The old man didn't realize it was him. Tatooine was the back edge of nowhere, after all. "I've taped your rips, so don't be stupid and hurt them all over again. Here, sit back."

The old man stepped into the dim light – Luke gathered that it was night – and another wave of nausea passed over him, only it was much more quickly.

_A cloaked man, humming a soft lullaby…warmth, safety…._

The smile on the old man's face faded briefly as he noticed Luke's sudden discomfort. "Are you alright?"

Luke shook his head. "Yes, fine….Uh…..thank you."

"No need for thanks," the old man answered, pulling a stool to sit by the bed. "Are you hungry? No? Well, young Lord Skywalker-" He paused as he saw the look of utter disbelief on the face of the young Lord of the Sith's face.

"Who _are_ you?" Luke demanded at great length.

The old man smiled and patted the boy's arm. "No one of any importance."

Luke settled back against the headboard. "In my experience, people of no importance are generally very important."

The old man laughed. "Very good, young Skywalker. Alright, then, you win; Kenobi."

Luke now tried very hard to throw the covers off of him and leap from the bed. He stopped for three reasons: One, there was a blinding pain in his left side, two, he had no idea where his lightsaber was, as it wasn't on his belt. And the third was the most startling of all.

A voice, a voice that was entirely too familiar, and glowed with the Light Side of the Force: _Hey, easy, do you want to break another rib?_

The old man placed a wrinkled hand on Luke's chest, and gently applied enough pressure to keep him seated. "What's gotten into your head?"

Luke was trying to find his focus. At length, he asked "You are the Jedi Obi Wan Kenobi?"

"Obi Wan?" The man was suddenly very surprised, leaning back. "Obi Wan. Now there's a name I've not heard in a long time…..I haven't gone by the name Obi Wan since…." He glanced at the boy, his sea blue eyes flashing. "Oh, before you were born."

Lord Skywalker was making another struggle. "Where's my lightsaber? I'll strike you down where you stand, you-"

_Relax._

Startled, Luke fell back again. Finally, he replied. _Stop doing that!_

"I think," said Kenobi, "you'd better lie down. Killing your saviors is not a gentlemanly thing to do."

Luke was seething. "You nearly killed my father."

The Jedi blinked. "So, that's what he told you, did he? That I tried to kill him?"

"Well, it's true, isn't it?"

The man stood up, mumbling to himself. "Well, that's very interesting….Oh, Anakin, you never change, do you?"

Luke blinked, leaned foreword. "Anakin?"

Obi Wan turned. "Well, of course. You didn't think his name was Vader for his whole life, did you?"

"Well, I…." He'd never thought to question that. It was one of those few stable things in his life, the few things that weren't mysterious.

"Your father has changed quite a bit from when I trained him."

"He's stronger now," insisted the son.

The Jedi snorted, and Luke inwardly snarled. "Yes, perhaps…." He whispered very softly.

"I promised him," Luke said slowly. "I promised him that when I met you, I'd kill you. For him. For revenge."

"I'd rather you didn't, believe me, I can beat you if I have to fight you here."

"You're a Jedi, no Jedi can beat me."

"Oh, so that's what you think, is it?"

"It's what I know!"

Wordlessly, Obi Wan drew a lightsaber to his palm using the Force.

_Damn it, Luke, you should have kept your stupid mouth shut!_

"Hey, hold on a minute!" Luke shouted. "At least give me my weapon first!"

Kenobi turned the weapon so that the hilt stuck toward Luke, and came close enough for him to take it. "But this is yours."

Lord Skywalker glanced at it, and shook his head. "That's not mine."

"It is," replied the Jedi, opening the boy's hand and placing the weapon inside. "It was your fathers, and now it is yours."

Gaping, the young Lord of the Sith could only stare down at the lightsaber in his hand. His breath came in shallow pulls, and he had to blink several times to comprehend everything that was happening to him. "But my father's is-"

"This is the lightsaber he used when he trained to be a Jedi, before he was corrupted, before he was turned."

_"Your fathers lightsaber. This is the weapon of a Jedi Knight. Not as clumsy or as random as a blaster."_

Luke felt as if he might cry, which was odd, since he hadn't cried since he was six. He turned his eyes back to Obi Wan. "Why are you doing this for me? You don't even know me! I just declared that I wanted you dead! What feeling other than hate could you possibly have for me?"

Kenobi sat back down. "A Jedi does not give in to hate. Hate eats at a person's soul. And I do know you, Luke. I've known you fore eighteen years. I was there when you were born. And I made a promise that I would protect you, and when the time came, train you to be a Jedi. I think that time has come."

Lord Skywalker chocked. "And what if I don't want to be a Jedi?"

The Jedi sighed. "Then everything that the Jedi and your mother ever fought for was in vain."

"My mother? Wait, you knew my mother?"

The old man blinked, as if that should have been obvious. "Yes…."

"Then….you would know what her name was?"

Obi Wan stared at the young man, who began to feel uncomfortable. "He never even told you who your mother was?"

"She was a traitor to the Empire," the Lord of the Sith pressed angrily, leaping to the defense of his sire. "It was perfectly fine for him to-"

"But you wanted to know." Luke turned his head away. "But you had a right to know!" Lord Skywalker mumbled something unintelligible, and Kenobi rubbed at his temples. "I never dreamed it would be as bad as all this. The lies he's been telling you."

"He'd never lie to me!"

"From what you've revealed to me, he already has."

The Lord of the Sith tried to formulate some protest, but all he could gather was an angry rebuttal. "Look, I don't know who you think you are, but I'm not going to sit here and take it. I'm not going to become a Jedi, and I demand that you take me back to my troops!"

The Jedi sighed, shrugged. "I'm not going to hold you here against your will, Luke. Alright, you can go back. But it can wait until the morning."

The old man got up to go, but the boy's conscience plagued him. "Hey, wait…." Obi Wan turned and looked down at him. "Thank you….for today…..I would have died if you hadn't been there….thanks."

A smile tugged at Kenobi's lips. "I had to. I promised your mother I'd protect you, and I promised myself."

Luke could not reply as he watched the man go.

_I must be going crazy._

He laid down, trying to fall asleep.

**To Be Continued….**

Schnickledooger: Hey, look, don't blame me. It's Band Festival season, so I'm packed to the gills at the moment. Also, I'm going to be gone until Sunday, so I won't be able to work on this until then, too. Going to Seattle for the High School Newspaper Convention.

Oh, I know! I always hate that! They kill poor Kenobi off in, like, the first three paragraphs, and then I'm like "O.O NUUUUU!" But, yeah, this chapter answers your question.

Cookiemunster: Ouch, I wouldn't say that. As for Han and Chewie: Wait and see. Wow, bad joke. You're forgiven.

xInuyashaxAngelx: Well, you'll just have to read and find out, won't you? ;)

Anthestria: My opinion: Man, it would suck to be him.


	6. Part 1 Chapter 5

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Five**

"I'm wearing white."

The young Lord Skywalker was seething. Obi Wan merely glanced at the irate boy as he finished clearing the morning dishes.

"Yes, that's obvious."

"I _hate_ white! Why can't I wear _my _clothes?"

"Stop complaining, you sound like a child. Excluding the fact that you are one."

"I am _not_ a child!" Luke protested with an angry stamp of his foot, glaring at Kenobi. "I'm eighteen years old."

"Then stop behaving like you're only eight years old."

The Lord of the Sith did a very un-Sith-ly thing: He pouted.

"Look," explained the Jedi as though to a very young child, "your other clothes were torn, dirty, thick, black, and hot. These are clean, in good condition, white, light, and much better suited for life on Tatooine. No, be a good boy and help an old man with the dishes."

Grudgingly, the Sith Lord grabbed a dish towel and began to dry the now clean plates. Finally, he mumbled "Thanks again."

The old man smiled, and said nothing.

…

Luke was feeling very sick again as the pair trekked back towards the Imperial camp. It magnified ten fold as smoke cleared the horizon. The pair glanced at each other with a questioning expression before looking warily out at the horizon. The old Jedi took a distance viewer from his belt, handing it to the younger boy.

"What do you see?"

"It looks like….a transport of some sort….I can't really tell. It's…on fire! Or it was. Now it's just sort of smoldering."

Obi Wan stroked at his thin, white beard, humming softly before taking the distance viewer and looking for himself. "A Jawa Transport, for certain. Ambushed, and slaughtered."

_"It looks like Sandpeople did this, all right. Look, here are Gaffi sticks, Bantha tracks. It's just...I never heard of them hitting anything this big before!"_

Lord Skywalker's hands gripped at his knees as he began to bend down, feeling at any moment he was going to be relieved of his breakfast. Worriedly, Kenobi put a hand on his back. "Are you alright?"

The young Lord of the Sith gave his head a little shake, straightening up again. "Fine." Not true. Very un-fine. But he was of strong stock, he'd be alright. Catching his breath, he turned his icy blue eyes to the Jedi. "Who'd want to slaughter Jawas?"

The old man grimaced. "Can you take a guess?"

The Sith Lord clenched his fists, undirected rage boiling within him. "But why? I gave no order, and they wouldn't….unless….."

Luke spun on his heels, snatching the distance viewer back. Some trace, some sign, it had to be there. They had to have found the droids, had to have traced them to those Jawas somehow. This was far too fresh for them to have done it in the night and then sneak off. There was evidence near by. They'd either be hunting down the droids' final resting spot, or would be carrying them off to camp as of that moment.

Smoke, and not that distant.

_"If they traced the robots here, they may have learned who they sold them to. And that would lead them home!"_

Lord Skywalker literally retched, clutching at his stomach with one arm. Stumbling backwards, he fell against the old Jedi, who caught him, stopping him from falling to the ground.

"Are you alright?"

"Something's very, very wrong! We've got to go, now!"

"You sense something!"

"I…I don't know," he fumbled, shoving the distance viewer back into Obi Wan's hands. "I just know that we need to get out of here."

Kenobi nodded, and did not protest.

…

They came upon the Imperial soldiers within two hours. Three of them, at a homestead, the two droids in custody. A gold bipedal protocol droid, and a blue, tripod R2 unit. Wisely, the Jedi stayed well back, and went entirely unnoticed as the events unraveled.

"Lord Skywalker! We've found the droids, sir. We weren't sure where you went! The camp was quite frantic. Should I-"

The young Lord of the Sith cut the Storm Trooper off with a wave of his hand, staring at the still burning wreckage of the farm house. His eyes very quickly caught the sight of the two burning human corpses, now scorched black skeletons, baking in the suns. His heart leapt into his throat before beginning to break into a million pieces. He knew them, he just had to! A desperate cry was struggling to pass through his throat and to his lips, and he could not make it come. Swift and fleeting childhood memories of two kind and weathered faces swept past and through him, and the Sith Lord could not breathe. Sweet comforting words in times of night and darkest fear, happy memories of a life of ignorant bliss. A far away longing…..

He _did_ know them. At least, his heart did.

"Who were these people? Did you do this?" he finally chocked out, his hand unconsciously wrapping around the hilt of his lightsaber at his belt.

The second soldier stepped up. "The owners of the two droids, sir. They put up resistance, and so we-"

"You _murdered_ them?"

The Storm Trooper hesitated. "We thought it necessary to take action in order to procure the plans to the-"

"You just _burned_ them alive?"

"Sir, we thought-"

_Flash, hiss!_

In one angry swipe, Luke had ripped the weapon from his belt and thrust the pulsing red point into the second soldier's chest. He could feel the eyes blink in stupid surprise as he drew it out, and the dying body slowly collapsed to his knees, to the ground. With another movement, Lord Skywalker had decapitated the third Storm Trooper, and had to chase down the first, which was running in terror. Tears flowing freely, the young Lord of the Sith let all of his anger loose, saw the true terrible beauty that was the Dark Side as he butchered the soldier like a Bantha.

The Sith Lord's hands were speckled with blood, and he stumbled to the side of one of the burning corpses. Slowly, he fell to his knees, shaking as he cried for the first time in at least twelve years. Sobbing, he glared at his hand, switching the pulsing red lightsaber off, tossing it away distastefully. Carefully, he cradled one of the black skulls, his tears creating dark spots.

_"Uncle Owen! Aunt Beru?"_

He didn't need to understand consciously to have the meaning of the moment sink in. Reverently, he kissed the burned bone, found that he loved it, in spite of himself. He did know those people. He just wasn't sure how, or why, or even when he knew them. He just knew that something very dear had been ripped from him.

"I am so, so sorry….."

The wind picked up a little, pushing the blond hair from his eyes, drying the tears on his hot cheeks. All of his murders, all of his secret sins came flooding back to him, causing him to cry all the harder. And with the tears they were washed away, melting into the desert, becoming nothing, never having really been.

And within him, the questions that would start his long, terrible, wonderful journey started. The first questions. The strongest of all: _Who am I? What is my purpose? What am I doing here? What's real anymore?_

The old man laid a careful hand on the boy's shoulder, and he stopped shaking, carefully laying the skeleton back down. "I….I don't want to do this anymore," he managed between sobs. "I don't want to be a Lord of the Sith!" Turning his head, icy blue eyes focused on the old Jedi, he took his hand, holding it tightly. The only one who could keep him from drowning within himself. Only him. Obi Wan Kenobi. His enemy. His savior.

Reverently, Luke said "I want to be a Jedi, _Master _Obi Wan."

**To Be Continued….**

_I'm a terrible person, I know. And it's high time I explain why I haven't been updating a lot: 1. We're starting puppetry in drama. Not a big reason, but it helps to eat a little of my time. 2. In English we were reading The Lord of the Flies and had questions to answer, quizzes to take, essays to write. I was supposed to have finished the book last week, and I only just finished it today. I now have to start on 1984, so there's some more time gone. 3. Two words: Geometry Sucks. 4. It's band festival season! In fact, it's the pinnacle of band festival season, with State coming up. And because my director is a Music Nazi (I really do heart him so. Insult and I kill.) he tossed out our biggest piece and we have about two more weeks to have perfected an entirely new and different one. Though it is easier. And, here's how I know the school year's almost over: He's scheduled marching rehearsal for the Starlight Parade, so that's even more time gone. I'm also working on my solo for church, and the stuff my private teacher assigns me. 5. Two more words: Government. Sucks. 6. As I said before, I just got back from Seattle on the 10th. I went to a big High School Newspaper convention there, and our school paper is the forth best paper in the nation! Whoot! However, I'm going to be the Entertainment editor next year, and this issue I have to practice that, along with learning to design pages. And I have to attend two paste up nights, so that's some HUGE time gone.7. I need to make sure my biology grade does not drop, or I won't be updating for a VERY long time. 8. It was my birthday last week. Sweet 16 and all that. So I'm just busy with family and friends. 9. I run a roleplaying website. It eats gargantuan amounts of time. 10. I like to read. 11. I like to write other things. The more time I spend on this fic, the more doesn't get done on others, and there's some I really, really need to work on. 12. I have to take Health online, and it needs to be done by July. 13. My parents are computer Nazis 14. Surprising even to myself, I have a life outside the Internet. Well, sorta, anyway. So there you have it. I just can't devote myself to this 24/7. I would if I could, but I like sleep._

_In an attempt to clear some plot bunnies out of my head and keep you people off my backs (cough Schnickledooger) you can check out the sidelines of this story in my look up under the title Where You Were Going To. _

_So, enough of my bitching. Let's answer reviews!_

xInuyashaxangelx: Thanks! I really appreciate the patience.

Silverkitcat: The Force, not Ben, and the third question has been answered.

k00lgirl1808: Thanks!

Passon: Thanks, I try.

Schnickledooger: o.O? Your scene scares me.

points to HUGE A.N.: There you go.

Satisfied?

Luke1: Thank you so much! flushes Well, I try….. Yeah, I like that too. There's a huge, angsty look into Luke's very messed up mind, but I'm saving it for "Interlude," which takes place between ANH and ESB. Obviously, this is a long way off, so I might give in and do it just a little bit sooner. But who knows?

Anthestria: Luke'll be dong that later. At the moment, he's busy trying to sort through the mess in his head.

Stargazer: Thank you very, very much!


	7. Part 1 Chapter 6

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Six**

Luke had never tried to put up such a strong barrier around his thoughts before. Still, this did not dampen his desperate zeal for trying to. Somehow, he knew he could. If he were assigned the sometimes tricky duty of assassinating a Force sensitive, he could put extremely strong walls up. But he wanted them to be one hundred times more strong than that.

He succeeded admirably. He locked himself away inside his own mind so well that not even Obi Wan, standing right next to him, could detect the confused and aching boy using the Force.

Everything around Luke was different now. He flatly refused to touch his old garments. He burned them in effigy to his old life that he was leaving thoroughly behind. He had never bothered picking up his lightsaber after tossing it away. He used his father's instead. The light blue blade was actually a bit less bulky than Luke's old one. The other had forced him to work constantly on improving his muscle mass and simply overrunning an enemy. The new one – new to him, in any case – was better suited for his lighter frame, and focused more on speed than strength. Still, Luke couldn't truly be proficient with it as it wasn't his. But he was not quite ready to set about the hard task of making a new lightsaber. That reflected who you were, it was a part of you, something you had labored to create. And until Luke knew who he was, he could not bear the idea of making something from him. It would only mean another mystery to solve, and he had enough of those.

Keeping himself blocked off from everyone was entirely his intention. He didn't want anyone to find him. At once he was both reaching desperately out for someone to grab onto, and at the same time drawing away. A more apt description might be that he wanted his soul to be saved. His mind he wanted to be good and left alone.

But who was he hiding from? Certainly not Kenobi. Quite the contrary. Lord Skywalker – now just Padawan Skywalker – could keep nothing from the old man. Whatever he asked of Luke was delivered ten fold. He was as a beaten and starved puppy; so readily obedient, so willing to please, and yet still very terrified.

Probably the easiest transition out of all was the transition from powerful Sith Lord to weak Jedi Padawan. The tumble from the top was quite easy to bear. He didn't in the least mind the falling sensation. It was the bone shattering landing that jarred him.

But now the healing could begin. "To get better you must get worse," he had once been told. And it was true. The healing was more painful than the actual wound. Luke didn't care. He bore it with patient, mournful, apathetic indifference. His world had been turned upside down in two chaotic minutes that he didn't understand any more. Or had it been two hours?

In the end, Luke really wasn't sure why he'd, sobbing, declared himself seceded from the Sith and from the Empire. There was something far more terrible than seeing two burning skeletons. He'd seen lots of burning skeletons. So, something had come together and exactly the right time, in exactly the right setting to shatter him, to push him through a catharsis. And he wanted to know what it was.

It seemed he wanted to know a lot of things these days. Who his mother was, what sort of transformation he'd undergone, what had driven him to it. And who he was. That rang clear as a bell in his mind. He knew what he was, in a vague sort of sense. But who he was? How did one even find that sort of information out?

He decided that what he needed to know was buried in his soul somewhere. But he wasn't sure what he needed to do in order to draw it out. How did one go about dragging secrets from a soul? It was a trick he desperately needed to know. And someday, he would. But not yet.

That would have to wait. The journey his soul was taking would take forever, and he would have to be patient to see when he would learn what he so desperately needed to learn. And that was another thing he needed to learn: patience.

But who was Luke trying to hide himself from? That is a very easy question to answer.

…

"You go in."

"No, you go in."

The two deck officers on board the Death Star were nervously shifting from foot to foot. Neither were quite willing to enter Darth Vader's antechamber and be the harbinger of death. Mostly because it was almost certain that their own death knoll would be sounded as well. But the news must be delivered, flood, fire, or fog. Or maybe it could wait. Was it really _that_ important?

"Look," said the first, nervously gripping the wrapped object in his hand, "we'll flip for it. Heads, I win, tails, you lose."

"Oka- Wait a second! I'm not that stupid."

"Fine, heads I go in, tails you go in. Fair?"

"Fair."

"Okay then."

The first dug out a coin and was about to toss it when the other cried out "Wait!"

"What is it now?" demanded the first, angrily and nervously clutching the piece of metal.

"How do I know it's not a trick coin?"

"Look, here, see it! See?"

The second carefully examined the coin and nodded his head. "Okay, but I flip."

"What? But it's my coin!"

"Exactly!"

Grumbling, the first gave in, and the coin was tossed: heads. "So, um," the owner of the coin muttered, "was it me who went in if it were heads, or you?"

"Just go!"

The second gave him an angry shove at the door, and the trembling man stumbled over his own feet. Straightening, he gathered all his courage, and entered. Barely managing to keep his voice from cracking, he walked over to the impatient and expectant Vader and nervously handed him the small brown package.

"I regret to inform you, sir, that we have received reports that your son, Lord Skywalker, is dead." Following this surprisingly solid string of words came the silent thoughts of "Please don't kill me, please don't kill me, please don't kill me."

Stunned, the Dark Lord did not move, his black, gloved fingers tightening around the package. The room was entirely silent as the Lord of the Sith unwrapped the package, only to be met with his son's lightsaber.

"Storm Troopers believe it was murder, as there were three other dead bodies of soldiers. Only that was left."

A tense moment crawled by, a moment when absolutely no oxygen was inhaled. Gulping, the officer felt himself begin to shake. Finally came the longed for words from the deep and terrifying voice: "You may go." Saluting, the officer marched out to safety, and the Sith Lord continued to stand there, clutching at the lightsaber.

_Luke?_

There came no reply. The terrible sorrow came rolling off of the Force user. Surely his son would respond to that. If he were still alive.

_Luke? _He tried again, and still there came no answer. He probed and groped for some sparkle that signified his only child's presence, but nothing came.

He was dead.

And Darth Vader was bitterly alone. He'd long ago been forced to endure the lesson that you cannot fully appreciate something until you lose it. It seemed unfair that he was forced to learn it all over again. How could he be dead? What could have possibly killed _his boy? _It was just simply impossible.

_"So….You're my….I'm your….." _

He well remembered prying that tiny bundle from the stunned Jedi's arms. He could never forget the soft blond hair and the icy blue eyes. And that first moment when he'd known that he was a father. When he'd known that there was someone who did love him unconditionally. That little baby boy, so unafraid, so perfect. _His baby boy._

_Luke….please, don't do this. _Nothing._ Luke!_

The demand went unanswered, and the father felt his heart breaking. Everything he'd ever loved or held onto had been stolen from him in one way or another. How could fate be so cruel as to steal away his son? How was it possible?

Finally sucking in a painful breath, the Dark Lord locked the lightsaber securely in a cabinet. He couldn't stand to look at it. It just wasn't fair! How…how! There wasn't even a question to formulate at such sudden, undeserved, unexpected pain. He wheeled from it in a terrible frenzy of emotion that he hadn't let himself feel in years.

He'd never gotten to tell Luke that he loved him. He'd never really gotten to say goodbye. Did he know? Did he care? Was he disappointed? What were his last thoughts as he died? They were unanswerable questions, and the Lord of the Sith hated them.

And the princess! What to do with her now? Should he tell her that her sort of future fiancé was dead? It wasn't any real concern of hers. Maybe he would, and maybe he wouldn't. He supposed it really didn't matter, in the end. Very little mattered, it seemed. There wasn't much point to much of anything. Not without the one bright light in his life.

_Luke? _The air was still empty around him.

**To Be Continued….**

Bill: I find your review amusing in the sense that I don't understand what has upset you. If you think that writing this is easy or I'm taking the easy way out, you're sadly mistaken. Yes, I am following the plot line of the movie. That was my whole intention. But it is an experiment of sorts. Luke is very different than before. He'd darker, he's more easily upset. Now I'm going to take that and find how things change. Basically, what I'm telling you is that this will pay off in later chapters, but I could see it being so much as a year before that sort of pay off comes. So, hey, I'm not going to make you read it.

Schnickledooger: Thanks! Great to know I have support.

Scullymunder: Thanks very much!

Elocindragon: It's got charm, doesn't it? Well, hope you'll like he stuff to come.


	8. Part 1 Chapter 7

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Seven**

Luke did very little as he waited for his ribs to heal. He asked no questions. He demanded no answers. However, he'd been having trouble sleeping, and the strain was beginning to show in his face.

_"In the bulb, there is a flower;_

_In the seed, an apple tree;_

_In cocoons, a hidden promise:_

_Butterflies will soon be free!_

_In the cold and snow of winter_

_There's a Spring that waits to be,_

_Unrevealed until its season,_

_Something Fate alone can see."_

He caught more of the whispered melody each night, the soft, humming tune, and he awoke with tear trails on his cheeks and the word "mother," dying on his lips. He tried to hold on to the fleeting song so desperately, but the tighter he held, the more slippery it became. His desperation grew, and so did his stubborn resolve.

…

"You're going to tell me about my mother."

Obi Wan could see quite clearly that it was not a request. The boy had sat him down and stared him right in the eye and demanded it.

"Of course," he'd replied with a shrug. Padawan Skywalker was so used to being brushed off that the simple agreement astounded him. Kenobi smiled at him, slightly amused, before asking "What do you want to know?"

Clearly, the young Jedi had only planed on his strategy for attack, not for what would happen if he won. "Uhh…" he fumbled for a few minutes before finding some remote question to ask. "What was her name?"

"Padmè Amidala Skywalker."

Luke sank slightly in his chair, processing and reveling in the new secret treasure. The old man tapped his fingers against his leg as he waited for the young boy to figure out his next question.

"Where was she from?"

"Naboo."

"How old was I when she died?"

"Two. You left her when you were a few months shy of your first birthday."

"Did she love my father?"

"Yes."

"Did my father love her?"

"Yes."

That was astounding, and Luke could not repress a small smile. He wanted nothing more than something stable, and normal, and he could envision it with a certain sense of accuracy now. "Did she love me?"

"She adored you."

"Then why did she send me away to live with my father?"

The Jedi shifted uncomfortably, was not willing to admit to his own part in that failed plot. "She didn't have a choice."

"Why did my father want me?"

"He knew you would grow up to be powerful."

"So that's it?" The old Jedi did not seem to understand the question. "It wasn't because he cared about me?"

"Ah," echoed Obi Wan slowly, nodding his head. "You'll have to ask him that."

Luke glowered darkly, staring intently at the floor. "I'm not going to ask him anything. I don't want anything to do with him."

Kenobi sighed. "No, I'd imagine not." Silence. "It seems you're in a bit of a difficult situation. But, please, Luke, remember, you've got to let the hurting go. If you don't let the pain go you'll never heal."

"But healing is so difficult," he murmured. "I don't want to let go, it's so hard."

"Yes, most things that are worth while are difficult. But penning the hurting in will only make everything worse. You've got to let it go."

Finally, the young boy met the old Jedi's watching eyes. "I will, someday. But I can't yet. I just can't do that yet." He rubbed his hands, trying to focus on the good; he got to learn about his mother. Stay on that path. "How did she and my father meet."

"I think that is another question that would be answered with better justice by your father. My memory is old."

"You remember," insisted Luke passionately, desperately.

"Yes, but I still won't tell you."

Luke gave in and gave up. He never pushed the limits with the old man. That went against some strange and buried loyalty that he'd built up as a glowing shrine to Kenobi. In making a mad dash away from his father, he'd stumbled onto another one, only completely different.

"Do you have anymore questions?" Luke shook his head. "Good. I think you're in good enough condition that we can move on, now." He motioned the small, blue, tripod droid – R2D2, Luke believe was the thing's name – and said, "Our little friend has something here that I think you'd be interested in."

The hologram flashed blue and grainy in the air, and Luke felt his breath catch in his throat. He couldn't have repeated the information if his life depended on it, for his mind was totally occupied with different thoughts altogether.

_Leia….._

He felt terribly guilty for not giving the love of his life a second thought since his transition into the Jedi. He could hardly be blamed, as his soul had been hurting, and his mind had been occupied. But now a flood of guilty questions overflowed into his mind. Was she alright? Did she miss him? Were they letting her go? Had she told them where the rebels were? _Was she even still alive?_

When the message stopped, Luke looked quickly up at his slightly surprised mentor. "How soon can we leave for Alderaan?"

…

Luke couldn't help but sink in a slightly guilty manner in the speeder as they entered Mos Eisley Space Port. As the Storm Troopers stopped them, Luke felt a growing, sickening pit form in his stomach, and it felt all too familiar.

_They don't know you, they won't recognize you, _he repeated in his head over and over, but it gave very little reassurance.

"How long have you had these droids?" the commander asked. Force, were they still looking for Artoo and Threepio? _Of course, they have to. They don't have any other leads._

"About three or four seasons," Luke muttered, trying to seem like he knew what he was talking about.

"They're up for sale, if you want them," added Obi Wan with a nice touch of faked honesty.

"Let me see some identification."

"You don't need to see his identification."

When Luke realized what Kenobi was doing, he subtly added his own weight of power. Not that it was needed. Storm Troopers were easy to confuse. He'd been doing it since he was four.

"We don't need to see his identification," the Storm Trooper echoed mindlessly.

"These aren't the droids you're looking for," Luke added with real confidence. The Master and the Apprentice shared an understanding look, and a proud smile, and Luke felt his heart swell with glowing joy.

"These aren't the droids we're looking for."

"He can go about his business."

"You can go about your business."

"Move along," the old Jedi finally finished, and Luke felt the last of his nervousness disappear.

"Move along, move along."

If Luke was impressed by his mentor's calm handling of the situation, he was far less impressed with his choice on where they would find a pilot.

"Do you really think we're going to find a pilot here that will take us to Alderaan?" he asked quite skeptically.

"Well, most of the best freighter pilots can be found here. Only watch your step. This place can be a little rough." Luke shook his head, far less confident than Kenobi.

"I can take it."

The old man grinned at him, his eyes sparkling. "Can you avoid breaking another rib while you're at it?"

Luke snorted playfully. "I can take life's knocks, Master Obi Wan. I'm more capable than you think."

"No, Luke, you're mistaken. I've never underestimated you. I always knew you could take what was dished at you."

And Luke knew he was telling the truth.

**To Be Continued…**

_The part of the poem I use as Padme's lullaby to Luke is "Hymn of Promise," by Natalie Sleeth. I use it without permission, and substituted the word "God," for "Fate," for the obvious reasons. _

xInuyashaxangelx: Thanks as always.

Schnickledooger: Thanks. Your scene was very……interesting (o.O?). I put the two guards in there as sort of inspiration from Macbeth. Some very dark stuff's been happening, and the audience just mentally needs a little relief from it. So, it's sort of my tribute to all the drunken porters of Shakespeare. I know I haven't been updating a lot. I've wanted to write on this, but I'm lazy. And I'm busy. And I'm sick. Plus, my dog just had puppies, so, goodbye free time. So, here's the next chapter for you, my ever devoted and obsessive fan hands an e-cookie

LeiaUndomiel: Thanks, I really appreciate the support.


	9. Part 1 Chapter 8

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Eight**

There was a flash, a hiss, and a howl of pain as Luke whipped his lightsaber out. The pulsing pale blue light danced briefly before its wielder smashed it across one of the ruffian's chest. The other escaped with one less arm. There was a vicious sneer on his lips, his left eye twitched spasmodically, and his shoulders rose and fell in erratic, angry respiration. He breathed out one clear message: Do. Not. Mess. With. Me.

Obi Wan quickly put a hand on his charge's shoulder, and Padawan Skywalker spun around, his nerves still shot, his eyes still dilated. "Put that thing away," Kenobi hissed, motioning to the lightsaber clutched in the young Jedi's angry fist. The boy switched it off and re-buckled it his belt, trying to regulate his breathing. "Don't turn around," whispered the old man, putting a little pressure on the shoulder in order to steer Luke in the direction he wanted him to go. "Walk this way, don't make eye contact."

Luke was very consciously aware that the denizens of the cantina were watching him, quite certain that they had never seen him around before. The hum and buzz of activity returned, but Luke still felt eyes on the back of his head. The Jedi steered his protégé into a slightly more remote area – Luke noted, however, a large, six or seven foot Wookie watching them expectantly – and asked "What happened?"

"I didn't start it, Master, honest! They started trying to pick a fight, and when push came to shove I just got…."

"You got angry." Luke couldn't meet his eyes, and felt a terrible pang of failure in his breast. He'd let his idolized teacher down. "You let the Dark Side have it's way with you."

Luke looked back up, his icy blue eyes fiercely repentant. "Master Obi Wan, I'm trying so hard!"

The old Jedi's finger's tightened affectionately on the shoulder, and Luke felt a little of the guilt lift. "I know you are. You'll get better, with time. At the moment, however, pressing matters call our attention." Obi Wan turned Luke so that they faced the Wookie, who walked up to them with long strides. "Chewbacca here is first mate on a ship that might suit our needs." Luke looked slightly nervously up at the towering fur ball, who gave a growl-ish sounding hello. The boy smiled anxiously.

…

Han Solo, Captain of the Millennium Falcon. And Luke hated him.

Han had never really had a chance in Luke's ever shrinking circle of high esteem. He'd grown up hating people like Han. He hated them for their wild independence, which Luke could never have because he was forever leashed to his father and to the emperor. He hated them because they were bastard children of mercenaries and whores, whilst he was the legitimate and only son of the second most powerful man in the galaxy and a queen of a planet whose name had never been revealed to him. He hated them because there was no one telling them what they would be if or when they grew up, they had the full spectrum of choice. He hated them because there was no one to bow to and no one to call "Master." No one threatened them with Force Lightning, and no beat theory and technique into their heads day and night and night and day. And he hated them because, even if they had nothing, and Luke had everything, they were quite a lot happier than he was.

Life was by and large unfair. He knew this quite well. So the smooth talking, fast dealing, and most assuredly handsome Han Solo quite clearly fit into this rather broad category of people he loathed and would have traded places with in a heart beat. He would have given anything to have grown up as a Luke Skywalker who probably didn't know who his parents were, or cared, and was the master of his own fate. Luke wouldn't be a master of his own life until after both Emperor Palpatine and his father were dead and gone. It just wasn't fair.

Luke knew he wasn't unattractive, but compared to Han Solo he felt severely inadequate. He knew he was smart, but Captain Solo issued a life skills sort of cleverness that Luke envied desperately. And all of these biased and rather unwarranted hates brewed and nagged in the back of Luke's mind so that he very much despised Solo when all he'd said was a handful of sentence:

"I'm Han Solo, Captain of the Millennium Falcon. Chewie here tells me you're looking for passage to the Alderaan System."

"Yes, indeed," confirmed Obi Wan. "If it's a fast ship."

"Fast ship?"

_Score one for the home team, _Luke thought with a self righteous sneer as he noted that the barb had succeeded in severely wounding the pirate's pride.

"You've never heard of the Millennium Falcon?"

Kenobi and Luke glanced at each other, and simply returned the smuggler a questioning look. "No," replied Luke.

"Should we have?" asked the old man.

"It's the ship that made the Kessel run in less than twelve parsecs," snarled Han through gritted teeth.

_Whoop de freaking do, _Luke thought, rolling his eyes. _I could do that in my TIE with my eyes closed._

"I've outrun Imperial Star Destroyers, and I'm not talking the bulk cruisers either. She's fast enough for you, old man." Luke sneered at the insult to his beloved mentor, and found his hand wrapping unconsciously around the hilt of his father's discarded lightsaber. Well, if it worked with those thugs before… "What's the cargo?" continued the completely oblivious Solo.

"Just passengers. Myself, the boy, two droids. And no questions asked."

Captain Solo raised a brown eye brow, and met Luke glare for glare before breaking the eye contact. "What is it, some kind of local trouble."

"You could call it that," allowed Luke.

"Let's just say," placated the Jedi peaceably, "we don't want any Imperial entanglements."

Luke had turned his head so that he could stare at a wall. The smuggler was watching him with strange interest, and Luke just flat out refused to give anything away by looking at him. Finally, with a coy smile, the pirate turned his attentions back to the old Jedi.

"Well, that's the real trick, isn't it? And it's going to cost you something extra. Ten thousand, in advance."

Luke angrily leaped from his chair, and Han was on his feet as well. Vexed, Obi Wan had a hand to his temple. "Ten thousand?" he demanded angrily. "We could almost buy our own ship for that!"

"But who's gonna fly it, kid, you?"

_Kid? _He snarled. Hell, he was eighteen, why did everyone insist that he was a kid? "You bet, I'm not such a bad pilot myself!" And he wasn't. He was excellent. He got it from his father, or so he'd been told.

"Luke," sighed Kenobi, and Luke looked down at his master in fierce, protective loyalty.

"We don't have to sit her and listen to-" A look silenced all of Luke's protests, and he sat down quickly and silently, staring intently at the wall again. Solo watched him questioningly, as if silently asking him "You're tough, you can handle yourself, and you know it, too. So what the hell are you doing with this old geezer?" And in reply to the silent, unasked question, Luke's reply was _It's something you wouldn't understand, I'm sure. _And he was right about that. Captain Solo would never understand the intense and loving bond that Master shared with Pupil. He'd never had such a relationship.

"We can pay you two thousand now, plus fifteen when we reach Alderaan." Luke's head snapped away from the wall and stared at his master, just as surprised as the pirate was. Both jaws were gapping, and even Luke entertained the fleeting idea that the old man had lost his senses.

"Seventeen thousand, huh?" marveled the pirate, unsure if he was just really lucky, or if the Jedi was just really stupid. The Wookie chorused with an amused rolling growl sort of noise. "Okay! You guy's have got yourselves a ship! We'll leave as soon as you're ready. Docking Bay Ninety Four."

"Ninety Four," echoed the old Jedi with a nod, noting that Luke was still gaping at him.

"Look's like someone's interested in your handy work," the man said with a nod in Luke's direction. The boy swiveled his head and inwardly cursed as he saw Storm Troopers enter. The pair rose from the table, and Luke shot a furtive glance well mixed with a glare at the smirking smuggler. Without so much as a word, he followed his master away from the table and out the door.

"Master," he hissed, "why did you do that? He's not worth half so much as-"

"Luke, you've got to know when to fold them and when to hold them, as the saying goes. Now, we need out of here, and it has to be now, so, in this case, the only way to win was to relent."

"If we had a ship, I could get us out of here without so much as a bat of an eye!" Luke cried, desperately trying to make his point and save a little face.

"I know that," Obi Wan said, reassuringly patting the boy's arm, "but it would have taken too long, and we would have drawn too much attention. Don't worry, Luke, I know what I'm doing. Don't you trust me?"

"Of course, Master Obi Wan," Luke said in his customary reverence. "I'll always trust you."

"Good," Kenobi said with a nod, smiling at his apprentice. "Now, let's see if we can't scrounge up that promised two thousand, hm?"

**To Be Continued…**

_I had a lot of trouble with the spacing on this one…._

xInuyashaxangelx: Well, so long as you keep reviewing, I'll keep writing .-


	10. Part 1 Chapter 9

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Nine**

"Stop that ship!"

Luke felt a stone knot of fear and dread suddenly build at the base of his stomach as he turned to find Storm Troopers approaching. He'd drawn his lightsaber out, but kept it off as Han whipped out his blaster. Solo fired a few shots, and Padawan Skywalker was forced to deflect to keep their only kind of sort of ally from getting himself killed. They both glanced at each other, and a wave of mutual understanding passed. It was, in retrospect, a rather extraordinary thing. They felt an odd connection to each other they neither expected nor wanted, and it threw them for a bit of a loop.

They put away their weapons, turned, and bolted up the gangplank as fast as their legs would carry them.

Both the last ones on board, they slammed into each other as they tried to get in, and ended up scowling fiercely and inwardly blaming the other. He felt the overwhelming desire to push the other off a cliff, but the need of the vessel and the Wookie's odd, if devoted loyalty, stopped that train of thought. Luke was stubborn; he might have even pursued the topic – even if they were being fired upon by Imperial soldiers – were it not for the fact that Captain Solo had turned and was shouting "Chewie, get us out of here!" Instead, the young Jedi tried to do as he'd been taught and let the incident go, calmly sitting down next to his Master and the droids and buckling himself in. It was so very hard, though. Especially with Captain Solo's enormous and obnoxious ego. Luke didn't quite figure that his own wasn't exactly small.

He was very conscious of the fact they were leaving Tatooine's atmosphere, and he doubted he'd ever been so glad in all of his life. It even out competed his relief whenever he left Coruscant. He instantly felt the stress that his odd bouts of illness placed on him lift just a little bit. He couldn't explain the odd memories he got that had never taken place, only that they preceded a sudden physical fatigue and a crescendo in using the Force. His body exhausted, his soul could do anything, and he felt as though he were being ripped apart by the warring factions.

_It's done, it's over, _he tried to rationalize to himself. But in his heart of hearts….he didn't really think that it was.

He wished he knew who those two people had been. He wondered why he'd cared so much that they were dead. He wondered a lot of things these days. He used to wonder enough, but it was very little, compared to now. Most of the questions he'd had before had been answered, but they'd only been replaced by new, terrible ones that gave the boy no rest. He was sure they would drive him past the brink of insanity, and that was just another burden he really didn't want to have to deal with. He needed to get some rest. He needed to take a break.

_The Millennium Falcon _rocked as it was fired upon, and Luke and Obi Wan ripped themselves out of their seats and rushed to the cockpit. The boy couldn't help but swear as he watched the pirate's hurried and imprecise techniques in handling the vessel. He never would have gotten away with that under his father's intense watch. His father had been an amazing pilot, so Luke had been told. That's where he got his skills from, again, so he'd been told. Luke wasn't exactly sure he believed much of any of the things he had been force fed as a boy. Everything about that life had been force fed. Luke was so used to having no choice at all, that when he found out he was supposed to have some options, he felt so…cheated, used. How could his father do that to him?

"Are you trying to get us all killed?" he demanded, and he could feel the aggravation coming in waves off of the smuggler.

"Shut up, kid, I know what I'm doing," he snarled as Chewbacca rumbled in a pleading sort of manner. Luke seriously doubted that he did, and despite Kenobi's whispered words of "Let it be," Luke was terrible at letting these sort of situations pass harmlessly.

"This bucket of bolts is-"

"Going to get you to Alderaan, in less you want me to eject you out of the ship."

The two faced off, and it almost felt as though they would be ridiculous enough to come to blow. It was unexplainable why the two rubbed each other the wrong way. They clashed so terribly it was unbelievable. The answer was that they saw in each other the qualities they hated about themselves.

Kenobi was looking extremely weary of the argument, though it continued in its insults for a few minutes before the old man practically dragged his apprentice out of the cockpit. And even then, Luke was in such a rage, that Kenobi practically had to beat mantra into his head to get him to calm down.

…

"You've got to exercise control, Luke. Remember, self discipline is key."

The boy's movements were precise, but they were still heavy. Using the Light Side of the Force was mentally draining and did not come so easily as the Dark Side always had. It frustrated him. It was as though the Force had suddenly become some sort of slippery creature, and the tighter Luke held to it, the slicker it became. It evaded his every attempt at snaring it, and it was crushing his enthusiasm. Had he done something wrong? Could you upset a web that connected life together? Did he need to apologize? He had to prove to Obi Wan that he could do this, that he could become a Jedi.

Moreover, Han was just laughing at him.

"You can't try and force it," reminded the old man. "When you are calm, at peace, then you will be your most powerful."

Remotes were never this difficult before. They were usually child's play, and yet as the young Jedi switched off his lightsaber, he was panting, and had to slick his messy blond hair back.

"The Dark Side will aid you quickly in a fight, but it leaves your soul a little weaker. It will not support you past your immediate goals."

Padawan Skywalker nodded at the Jedi, swallowing grimly. He stood straight and tried again, but not before shooting an odious glare in Solo's direction.

_Do not slice him in two, do not slice him in two, do not….._

He was still doing terribly, no matter what he tried. He was about ready to throw in the towel, he was so frustrated, but he had to make his master proud. And he had to shut Captain Solo up.

"Stretch out with your _feelings,_ Luke," the old Jedi implored.

Luke closed his eyes, and took deep, calming breaths. He felt his soul coming into focus as he found his center, slowly raising the lightsaber. He switched it on. The remote hummed into life.

_Slash! _

With quick, precise, flowing movement, every single attack of the remote was blocked, and all the same, Luke's heart beat never sped up, his breathing never became labored. He whirled, he sliced, he struck, and each time he achieved his goal. Opening his eyes, he was smiling very calmly, was more at peace and in tuned then he had ever been before. Moreover, the pirate was looking utterly stupefied.

His focus shifted back to Obi Wan, and he gazed lovingly for approval. He was met with a smile and a pat on the shoulder, and Luke felt extremely happy. The Light Side was not weak. It was flowing. You had to be in the flow of it, whilst the Dark Side moved with your own flow. That's why it was so ineffective. It had to put up with your inefficiencies. The Light demanded that you mold to it, so it required more effort. It required discipline. It required focus and strength, and Luke's confidence in his abilities as not a Lord of the Sith but a Jedi were so strengthened that he was practically walking on clouds.

Until both he and Kenobi suddenly felt a terrible rocking sensation, and had to lean on each other's shoulders for balance. The smuggler was looking at them funny, and the Wookie was growling worriedly.

Luke locked eyes with his mentor as they continued to lean on each other for support.

"What just happened?" the boy whispered, finding it hard as hell suddenly to catch his breath.

"I sense a great disturbance in the Force."

"But from what?"

An alarm went off and Han, still watching them, got up calmly. "Looks like we're coming up on Alderaan. I'll just leave you two to…whatever it is the hell you're doing."

Luke snarled, but the old man's grip on the young Jedi's shoulder tightened.

"Let aggression go. Do you see what happens when you let it go? You become powerful, you become calm. It is healthy for you, not only physically, but for your mental and emotional state as well."

"Do you think I'm doing a good job? Letting it go? Becoming a Jedi?"

"Excellent. I always knew you would. Ever since I cradled you in my arms when you were a baby, I knew."

The look of loving devotion in Luke's gaze increased tenfold. They shared a moment of silent understanding. Who was Vader to Luke? Not his father. Obi Wan was Luke's father. There was no grain to rub against, only support and understanding.

Luke had adored his father since he was a child. The sudden idea that his icon had lied to him and forced him into something that Luke had always known he never wanted made his soul ache so terribly that he felt the respect that bonded the boy to his sire fray so terribly it could not support the weight of a healthy relationship. In his wild careening away from his first father, he was really looking for a second, and he had found him in the beloved Kenobi. The admiration he felt for the old man was like nothing he could liken it to. He needed the Jedi terribly. He was the boy's hold on sanity, on hope. Otherwise….what could Luke do? He would be stuck in a quagmire, sinking deeper and deeper into the Darkness. He would not escape it if someone wasn't holding a light for him, trying to guide him out of the endless night. And he knew, in his heart, that the candle bearer was the old Jedi.

Come to take him home.

Now Luke just needed to find where home was.

**To Be Continued…**

_Well, we went to State on Friday and got back Saturday. By no means does this mean my troubles are over. Far from it. I had a nervous breakdown this morning. I wrote this up last night, and it's actually a pretty touching moment between Luke and Obi Wan._

Annmarie Aspasia: Thanks! I've designed Luke as sort of a Ying Yang. He isn't entirely dark, but there's a darkness in him that he'll never escape.

Cookiemunster: You'll see –big grin- Maybe he'll tell him later, maybe he'll tell him sooner.

Schnickledooger: Actually, when I put that chapter up, I hadn't received your review yet. Sorry.

TorontoBatFan: You hit the nail right on the head on Luke's love of Kenobi. Exactly. Perfect!

o.O? I knew that. Why did I say he did that in a TIE? What's with me? I think that was just my brain being loopy. Sorry –sweat drop.-

Genie05 the second: That's what I was going for Thanks.


	11. Part 1 Chapter 10

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Ten**

The ship was bouncing out of control, and C-3PO slammed painfully against the wall. Not that he could feel it, he was a droid. Luke, however, managed to remain stationary, and only once had to grab onto something for supporter. Another advantage of his excellent sense of balance. Just another one of those things that happened, he guessed. He briefly remembered the scene just a month, maybe a month and a half before, when their Star Destroyer had been fired upon. He could still remember the conversation he had had with his father…..And in a way, he almost missed him.

However, the interruption of his lesson would not be borne, and he was quite determined that it was Han's fault in some way, shape or form. After all, everything was the fault of people like Han in some way, shape or form. They constantly caused trouble. Padawan Skywalker snarled as he switched off his lightsaber, and stormed into the cockpit, where both pilot and co-pilot were trying to asses what the hell had just happened.

"What's going on?" he demanded, shifting his weight as the rickety _Millennium Falcon _rocked again.

Solo glanced at the boy, and seemed to pay no more attention than that. But, he finally did respond with "Our position is correct, except….No Alderaan!"

Obi Wan had just entered the cockpit when this fatal sentence was said. Luke's eyes had tripled in size, his breath had caught in his throat. They couldn't just….it was impossible that….

"What do you mean? Where is it?" he asked, quite a bit more feebly, his voice cracking.

"That's what I'm trying to tell ya, kid. It's been completely blown away!" Captain Solo grunted as lights started flashing and a few sirens went off. The smuggler made them disappear by punching a few buttons, smoothing whatever damage had occurred over. "But how?" the pirate asked himself somewhat softly.

"Destroyed," Luke chocked, leaning against the door.

"By the Empire," finished Kenobi.

Han wheeled in angry confusion on the pair. "The entire star fleet couldn't destroy a planet. It would take a thousand ships with more fire power than I-"

A look in Luke's eye stopped Solo short. He glanced at the old man, who had a slightly pained expression on his face. Captain Solo rose from his seat and angrily demanded "What the hell is going on?"

Before either master or apprentice could answer, the Wookie had rumbled, and the pirate had collapsed back into the chair, punching buttons. A TIE fighter had just zipped past the window, and Luke's already wide eyes grew even wider.

"There's another ship coming in," mumbled the smuggler, releasing Luke of a painful and awkward explanation. He was still reluctant to tell the smuggler anything. Was it because he felt he'd be looked down upon? Why? And why on earth was he looking for the smuggler's approval? "There aren't any bases around here…Where did it come from. Chewie, jam its transmissions."

"It'd be as well to let it go," advised the Jedi while Luke watched in stunned curiosity. "It's too far out."

"Not for long."

"A fighter that size couldn't have gotten this deep into space on it's own," Luke finally protested. "It must have gotten lost, been part of a convoy, or…." Luke really didn't want to finish that sentence. He didn't want to find out what "or," referred to. It was too terrible a thought, it was too horrendous a memory. After so much work at pushing the memories down, why, _why _did they resurface?

"Well, he ain't gonna be around long enough to tell anyone about us," replied Han, not noticing the nervous note in Luke's voice as he pushed the throttle. The ship sped up a little, gaining just a bit of ground on the enemy ship. "Look at him, he's headed for that small moon. I think I can get him before he gets there….He's almost in range."

The old Jedi leaned over the pilot's seat and stared while Luke shrank even farther back against the door. "That's no moon….."

_Don't say it…please don't say it….It can't be…It's not possible….it didn't happen…._

"It's a space station."

"It's too big to be a-"

Solo was cut short as Luke suddenly fled from the cockpit, as if he could look for some place to hide. Terror and adrenaline were pumping in his veins as thoughts and protests and instincts screamed in his head. And memories! Oh, Force, so many memories! He thought he was going to be sick, and there was no where to run to, no where to hide. He couldn't escape something that was inside of him. He never would. Was it always going to be like this? Why? _Why?_

"What's gotten into him?" Captain Solo demanded.

Obi Wan did not respond as he chased after his charge. "Luke? Luke!"

Captain Solo glanced at his co-pilot, who gave a grumbly growl. "The sooner we're done with this, the better, Chewie," he sighed, rubbing his face with his hands. "Hold up, this is going to be a bit of a bumpy ride."

Luke hadn't gone far, but he'd pressed his back against a wall, trying to calm his breathing. It wasn't helping. Nothing helped. Nothing ever helped. Above all else was the sense that there had to be a way to get out of here. He just _couldn't _go back on board the Death Star. The idea sent shivers down his spine. Memory after memory would attack him there, and would try to weaken his resolve. He didn't want to be a Lord of the Sith, but how could he resist when every where he turned he was being pulled in that direction? Master Obi Wan said his fate was to be a Jedi? Why, by the Force, then, couldn't he just be a Jedi and get it over with!

"I'm not going in there, Master. There's no way, I can't, I-"

The ship shuddered, and Luke's breathing grew more erratic. They were caught in the tractor beam. Oh, God, they were caught in the tractor beam. No choice now. No where to run, no where to hide. Caught. The net grew ever tighter, the quarry was as good as dead. The hunter drew near with his pack of hounds, and the club that would be the finishing blow, the club that would kill the prey and end the chase. His chances at being a Jedi – shattered. His master – likely to be executed. His punishment for desertion – severe. Always sever. There wasn't any other kind of punishment _but _severe. He could feel the Force Lighting, and his trembling increased. He could feel the burning, could see himself gasping for breath and writhing like a pitiful wretch at the emperor's feet, begging, and pleading for mercy. Any onlookers would be cold and unpitying. Luke might even die. Oh, God, he might even die…..He huddled farther against the wall, making his already slim figure smaller.

Kenobi put a hand on Luke's shoulder, and Luke felt his eyes drawn to that of his master's.

"I promise, I won't let anything happen to you. I'll always promise. I'll always be here."

"Can I believe that?"

"You have to trust me. Do you trust me?"

"I trust you, Master Obi Wan. I always have. I always will."

"I will never reject you."

"And I will never forsake you."

The grip on the shoulder tightened in the unspoken bonds of love, bonds as strong as steel. Tears sprang into Luke's eyes and he asked "They…they destroyed Alderaan, didn't they?"

The old man nodded slowly. "Yes, they destroyed Alderaan."

"My father did that."  
"Yes, he did."

"Leia's home planet…."

The Jedi raised an eyebrow. "You mean Princess Organa?"

"She's going to hate me now!"

"Luke, what are you talking about?"

Luke just shook his head. It wasn't worth the effort explaining. _She's going to hate me….She'll never forgive me…Damn it, Father, how am I ever going to convince her to marry me if you keep on blowing up planets?_

Luke still wanted to marry her. He loved her. And he was still convinced that there was still some way that she might ever possibly love him back. But not if she thought he was partially responsible for the death of her home planet and her entire family.

"Don't make me go on board the Death Star. Please, Master Obi Wan," Luke finally switched back to his original thought.

"We'll see what we can do. Sometimes being brave means going on, in spite of your fear."

"I…..I don't want to see my father….I don't want to go back."

"You won't go back, I promise, you won't go back. I won't let him take you away again, Luke. You're safe. That's a promise, and that's forever."

Luke nodded slowly, and took a deep breath, calming himself. It was just in time for the pirate to come storming down the hall. "If either of you hot shots have any ideas on how to get me out of this mess, they'd greatly be appreciated. We have to cut to auxiliary power. I _can't _take on a fully loaded battle station. We'll be blasted to bits."

Luke and the Jedi locked eyes for a moment. "Think you can handle this?" his master asked.

"I can take it. I'm stronger than you think, remember, Master Obi Wan? I can handle life's knocks."

The old Jedi grinned, and took his hand from off the boy's shoulder. Turning to the smuggler, he said "I've got a bit of an idea."

**To Be Continued…**

xInuyashaxangelx: Let's just say….not good.

Schnickledooger: Well, here's the Death Star, as asked for.

TorontoBatFan: Another peg on the head for the relationship between Luke and Han and between Luke and Obi. As for when Luke will give his father a chance again….It'll be a while. A long while. He's been hurt badly, and it's hard for him to accept that. As for anything happening to Obi Wan, that's not a bad assessment of Luke's mental state, either.

Joy4eva: Glad you liked it. Hope you'll read more. Reviews have been dropping off a lot lately – sniff – It makes me a bit sad.


	12. Part 1 Chapter 11

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Eleven**

The sound of boots clanked above them, and Luke pressed his back firmly to the wall. His eyes were closed, and his teeth were clenched in a desperate grimace as he sweated and prayed. His concentration was everything at that moment and he had to work harder than he ever had to keep his presence a secret.

_Don't move…don't breath…Oh, Force, please don't let him find me in here._

The boots died away, and after several tense moments, Han lifted the metal plate, and the fugitives began to climb out of the smuggling cargo hold. Only now daring to breath, Luke threw himself across the smooth floor and clawed his way out of the cargo hold, trying to regulate his breathing and remain calm. He knew that Solo was watching him oddly, so Padawan Skywalker broke the nervous silence with a tense whisper: "Boy, it sure is a good thing you have these compartments."

"I use them for smuggling," replied Captain Solo as he brushed dirt from off his sleeve. "But I never thought I'd be using them to smuggle myself." He cursed as the Wookie's head popped up and it growled curiously. "This is ridiculous. Even if I could take off, I'd never get past that tractor beam."

Obi Wan had climbed out of the compartment and was busily making sure his charge wasn't going to have a mental break down. "Leave that to me," he assured, and both young men stared at him.

"Damn fool," snarled the pirate. "I knew you'd say that."

"Who's the more foolish? The fool, or the fool who follows him?"

The smuggler and the boy locked eyes for a moment, and the young Jedi wore the fierce expression of "If Master Obi Wan says he can do it, he can do it."

…

"There's no one on board, sir. According to the log, the crew abandoned ship right after take off. It must be a decoy, sir. Several of the escape pods have been jettisoned."

Darth Vader paced the perimeter of the ship like a tiger on a chain. Something didn't feel right about it. What was it doing in the ruins of Alderaan? Why wasn't there anyone on board? Was it a signal? For who? The princess?

"Did you find any droids?" he finally responded, trying to sort through the mixed signals he was getting.

"No, sir. If there were any on board, they must have also been jettisoned."

"Send a scanning crew aboard, I want every part of this ship checked."

"Yes, sir."

"I sense something…A presence I have not…." He didn't finish. He just shook his head and stalked off, his cape swishing behind him.

The last time he'd felt the presence of Kenobi had been when the old man had been kidnapping Vader's son seventeen years ago. But that wasn't what startled him. For a moment….he felt….it seemed as though…..

_Forget it, _he advised himself. Luke was dead. He wasn't coming back. Not ever. The Jedi that had first kidnapped him was probably dead, too. Everyone was dead. Everyone always died. And it hurt. It hurt so terribly that the Sith Lord could barely stand it.

He missed his son. He wanted him to come home. But Luke wasn't going to come home.

…

Luke slid into the control room and hurriedly pushed the key pad for the doors to shut and lock. Ripping off his helmet, he began to angrily berate Han. "You know, between his howling and your blasting everything in sight, it's a wonder the whole station doesn't know we're here!"

The two titans locked forces once more as Solo wheeled with an equally impressive snarl on his face. "Bring 'em on! I prefer a straight fight to all this sneaking around!"

_If it's a straight fight you want, I'm happy to oblige! _Luke's fist clenched, but he didn't respond. Chewbacca whimpered nervously, a plea for them to leave off each other. They slowly turned around, unwilling to show the other their back, and stalked off to separate sides of the small office space. The old Jedi gave his young protégé a look that clearly meant "Cool it," and Luke flushed with a bit of shame. He just never could keep his ire down around Captain Solo.

C-3PO was busily translating for his R2 unit counterpart, but neither Luke nor the pirate were paying much attention. They were too busy trading glares from across the room.

"I don't think you boys can help."

The sentence ripped Luke out of his malice, and back into the real world. And the real world was suddenly terrifying.

"I must go alone."

"What? No!"

As his master had made for the door, Luke had dodged him and created a human barrier between Obi Wan and the way out.

"Master Obi Wan, you can't! Please, don't go alone, take me with you!"

"Be patient, Luke. Stay here and watch over the droids."

"But he can-"

"They must be delivered safely, or other star systems will suffer the same fate as Alderaan."

Luke looked away, bitter still from the biting memory. Those innocent people….It always seemed that Luke stumbled across innocent dead bodies, and now it seemed he was always deeply effected by them.

"Your destiny lies along a different path than mine."

That made Luke look sharply up. "What? No! That's not true. Master Obi Wan, please, I-"

"I can't stay with you forever, Luke. There's a part of this that you must learn to do on your own."

"I don't want to be alone."

"You never will."

"Of course I will be! I have no one left but you! You're the only person I have, you're the person that kept me alive, that changed me! You can't go away, please, Master, you can't go away."

"Luke…."

"You promised me you'd never leave me."

The smuggler had retreated farther back toward the computer, along with Chewie, their backs turned. Sappy scenes did nothing for them. Moreover, private displays of affection embarrassed them.

Kenobi was not looking at Luke. He was looking at some sort of space between the floor and the white Storm Trooper boots he was wearing. "I made a promise I couldn't keep," he finally admitted. "Sometimes people do that."

It was as though the blade of a knife were being forced between the young man's ribs. He fumbled, and felt a terrible, wrenching despair begin to eat at him. "Then you lied to me, too."

"Yes….I guess I did."

"How could you do this to me?" the boy demanded, biting back vengeful tears. "After all we went through together? After you said you were saving me from the lies my father told me, after you said you were telling me the truth!"

"I did tell you the truth, Luke! I never lied to you, not outright, and not on purpose. I wouldn't do that."

"But you're doing it right now!" There was a thick and heavy silence. "Master, please-"

"Luke, you are going to find that people will lie to you. Sometimes they lie to protect you, sometimes to hurt you, and sometimes because they don't know what else to do. Then it is up to you to decide what their intentions were, and what sort of people they are because of those intentions."

"No! All lies are the same, they're all-"

"The truth is seen from a certain point of view. What is true today isn't true tomorrow, and you can't count on anything to be constant. You wanted me to teach you. There. That is the ultimate, the one truth, if you will."

"But you said….I thought….Master…."

"Luke, I never wanted to hurt. Never. Whatever I told you was for the best as I could see it. If I made some mistakes in my decisions, then I am sorry. I am human. It happens."

"You're not….you're something so much better….At least, I thought you were."

"Then that is another thing you have learned; all the people you place on a pedestal will eventually fall. It is inevitable." Silence. "Luke, I am so, so sorry…"

"I…I don't care! I don't care if you lied to me, it doesn't matter! Please, just let me go with you, don't make me stay behind. Master Obi Wan, I need you!"

"And you'll always have me. But where I'm going you cannot follow."

They desperately gripped each other's shoulders, and Luke was trying hard to swallow what had just been forced at him. "Master…Don't leave me alone again in the world. I don't have anyone else but you."

"You've got to learn to spread your wings, Luke. The Force will be with you. Always."

"And what about you?"

"I'll be with you, too. Even if you can't see me, I'll still be there. You've just got to believe that. That is a truth. That is something you can hold on to."

Luke very reluctantly let his mentor go, and pushed the controls for the door to open.

"There you go…." He whispered. "Now you'd better get going."

The old man smiled very sadly and gave the boy's shoulder a parting squeeze. "I will never reject you."

"And I will never forsake you. Now you've got to get going…..please….before I change my mind."

The Jedi nodded and rushed down the hall way. Luke watched him until he turned and was out of sight. His body shivered slightly with repressed emotion as he shut and locked the door again, slumping against it.

He was alone. And it frightened him.

**To Be Continued…**

_Whoot! Now, this was a FUN chapter. Loads of fun. After I post this I'm going straight to work on the next one, which will also be fun. So I guess it's fun all around. Except for the fact that I can't see Revenge of the Sith until Memorial Day, and I might have to wait even longer. Man, that sucks._

Annmarie Aspasia: - whistles innocently – I'm still not telling….

xInuyashaxangelx: Luke is unbalanced enough that ANYTHING will push him over the edge. A pin could drop and he'd freak out.

Schnickledooger: You could be right. You could be wrong. I'm not telling.

Vivid Butterfly: Soon enough? Glad you enjoyed!

TorontoBatFan: You're really, really good at saying exactly what I was going for. Maybe that means I accomplished my goal? Maybe not. I love reading your reviews, so keep sending them.

Joy4eva: Thanks, I'll do my best!


	13. Part 1 Chapter 12

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Twelve**

The tension in the room had sky rocketed. Luke was staring, dumb and mute, at the door that his master had just left by. He was very afraid. All around him, the Dark Side was calling him, the Death Star was a constant reminder of what he had once been. And he didn't have the one anchor that kept him sane and in the Light. Could…could he do this alone? It didn't seem likely.

Han and the Wookie, however, were not quite as sensitive to Padawan Skywalker's needs as Obi Wan would have been. So, they relieved the excess pressure in the room the only way they knew how.

Unfortunately, they did it around the unstable and aggressive young Jedi.

Chewbacca grumbled something, and Solo agreed, crossing his arms. "Boy, you said it, Chewie. Where did you dig up that old fossil?"

The boy wheeled very, very slowly. The grating sound of his heels against the floor was just audible. The tension, instead of dissipating, had increased tenfold, as anger pressed and attacked Luke's senses. His fists were clenched, his teeth were bared, and he was very clearly resisting an urge of blood thirst.

"Master Obi Wan is a great man," he very slowly snarled. Unconsciously, his hand wrapped around his lightsaber. Training that Kenobi had given him forced him to release the weapon and focus on trying to regain his shattered composure.

_He did not just say that. He didn't. Oh, but if he did….But he didn't, so it doesn't matter._

"Yeah, great at getting us into trouble."

The snapping of Luke's nerves could almost be heard.

"Why you no good, self righteous, egotistical, son of a bitch! I'll-" There was no saying what Padawan Skywalker would do, as he was in the process of doing it. He'd tackled the very surprised Captain Solo and was wrestling with him as common as any criminal. Fists were flying, the Wookie was beside himself, not knowing who to help, and the blue tripod droid would not stop his anxious beeping. Luke hadn't gotten into a fist to fist fight since he was eight, but he didn't care. Damn Sith stubbornness and damn Jedi composure! That scum of a pirate had just insulted the old man, and hell if the boy wasn't going to tear his arms off for it. Through the mess of grunts and growls, Luke could just make out a very distressed voice.

"R2D2, what has gotten into you?"

Chewbacca had finally rendered the two opponents apart, rumbling in a very upset manner. The smuggler was trying to staunch the blood that was pouring from his nose, and Padawan Skywalker's hand covered his eye, which was rapidly turning black. Seething, they glanced at each other, and shared a common bond. The alpha males had contested each other. Whilst neither victor was plain, they could stand to be around each other a little bit more. At least for a short while.

"What?" Luke finally asked. "What's the matter with the little droid?"

"I'm afraid I'm not quite sure, sir," the gold bipedal droid sheepishly responded. "He keeps on saying 'I've found her,' and repeats 'She's here.'"

"Who?" demanded Han. "Who has he found?"

The astounded gasp from Luke drew attention to him as he peeled himself off the floor with lightning speed and stared intently at the map brought up on the computer screen.

"Leia!"

"Who?"

Artoo was still whirling, and Luke quickly demanded "What is it? What's wrong, what's he saying?"

"Oh dear…I'm afraid she's scheduled to be…terminated."

"No!"

"What the hell is going on?"

"We've got to save her!"

"Who?"

Padawan Skywalker grabbed Solo by his shirt color and dragged him off the floor, which only succeeded in confusing Captain Solo all the more. "Listen, we need to get out of here."

"What?" demanded the pirate. "Listen, the old man told us to stay here."

"But she didn't know they were going to execute her!"

"I don't even know who _she _is!"

Luke took a deep breath, and began to slowly relay what he was trying to communicate. "Imprisoned onboard is Princess Leia Organa. She's my fiancé. Sorta. Well, I mean, she hasn't said yes yet, but-"

"Will you just get to the point?"

"The point is that they're going to kill her and we've got to get her out of there!"

"Great! That sounds wonderful! Now, how the hell do you suggest we do that? Just prance on up to the detention block and announce 'Hey, we're a couple of rebels looking to save the princess! Could you point us in the right direction?'"

"Don't be stupid. They'd never let a couple of rebels in to the detention block."

"Thank you!"

"But they'd let Lord Skywalker in."

The incredible stupefaction on the smuggler's face only lasted a moment. "Yeah, that's a great idea. But there's a problem with that. We're talking about the same Lord Skywalker, right? The kid that's second in line to the Imperial throne?"

"He's eighteen, I wouldn't call him a kid!"

"I think he's a little bit busy, at the moment. Of course! Let's call him up, shall we? 'Lord Skywalker, your royal-ness, we need to rescue an enemy princess, can you get us into the detention block?'"

"He's not busy."

"What are you talking about?"

"More over, he'd help us out."

"That's it! You're crazy! You are stark raving mad. Listen to this kid, Chewie! Kid, I think you've had one too many knocks to the head. How do you know any of this stuff?"

"Because Lord Skywalker is standing right in front of you."

Silence. Very, very long silence. Five minutes passed easily with Luke's hands just sitting on Han's shoulder's, and Solo staring stupidly into Padawan Skywalker's serious blue eyes. For a moment, Captain Solo opened his mouth and tried to verbalize, but nothing came out. Five more minutes passed. He very slowly backed up and stood next to Chewie.

"Kid, you scare me. You've got to stop living this fantasy."

"I'm being quite serious."

"No…no," he laughed. "Funny. Really. But you need to stop."

"Look at me, will you, you damn pirate? I look just like him, don't I! Blond hair, blue eyes! I use a lightsaber, I talk like him, same height, same build. You know my name. It's Luke. I'm Luke frickin' Skywalker, you stupid putz! I'm Darth Vader's one and only son!" The horrified confusion continued, and Luke paced the room, laughing like a mad man. "Yes, yes, that's right! I'm second in line to the Imperial throne! Hahahaha! Isn't it a funny joke now, Han? Huh? Isn't it? You know, Lord Skywalker can choke his victims to death just by using the Force. But you don't believe in the Force, do ya, Han? Let's test that theory, shall we?"

The pirate felt a very slight pressure around his neck, and whipped out his blaster while Luke just sneered, a crazed flash in his blue eyes. "You've gone off the deep end!"

"Look me in the eye, damn it, you stupid piece of filth! Do I look like I'm joking? Do I look like I'm lying?"

There was a quiet, tense moment when the two just stared at each other. Very slowly, the smuggler slid his blaster back into its holster. "No….you look barmy, but you don't look like you're lying."

Luke sucked in a breath and nodded. "Okay, so, we're on the same page here. That's good, that's very good."

"If you think I'm going to start being afraid of you because of what your name is, you're dead wrong."

Luke grinned. "No, I didn't think you would. I'm glad you won't." They shared a knowing smile, and it ended quickly.

"So, how are we getting this princess of yours out of her cell?"

Luke spotted a pair of binders on the counter and scooped them up. "How good at you at acting."

"Depends on the nature. Why?"

"Just a crazy little idea I have."

"You get a lot of those, huh?"

"Maybe."

"Why are you hanging around with a Jedi? Falling out with father?"

"It's complicated."

"I like complicated. Complicated makes life interesting."

"No, it's too complicated. All I want is simplicity. I never seem to get that."

"No one's every happy with what they have. Not even Imperial Princes."

"No even Corellian Smugglers."

They grinned again, and Luke handed him the binders. "Put these on your friend. Here, let's see if we can find another pair for you. That'd make things a lot easier. Damn it, I wish I was wearing black….They'd believe me more if I was in black…."

"Hey, if you put on the same show for them as for me, they'd believe you if you were in pink."

**To Be Continued…**

_Whoot! Another uber fun one. The next should be pretty entertaining too. I was bombarded with reviews for the last chapters, so I was really, really happy! I love reviews, so please give me one!_

Cookiemunster: -snork- Great review. Loved reading it. Suffice to say that wrong stuff seems to abound with Luke.

The Heroin addict is an apt description. I mean, look at him! He's gone completely mental!

Beka Darko: Ah…well, if I did copy, it was entirely unintentional, as I still haven't seen the movie. I get to see it for sure in a week though!

Vivid Butterfly: Glad to have pleased you, oh great one.

Kitt: Thanks, will do!

Schnickledooger: um….yeah, I'll try to make it humorous without being….disturbing.

TorontoBatFan: -big grin- I really love reading your reviews. They are so awesome. And this one was a favorite. Well, thanks for the feedback and the really interesting insight. Hope you enjoy!

jamy skywalker: Thanks! Here it is, for your enjoyment.


	14. Part 1 Chapter 13

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Thirteen**

Luke knew all the short cuts, all the back alleys, all there was to know about the Death Star. In a way, it was like some strange homecoming. He was back in his own territory again. He knew the ropes, knew the rules. If he needed to have contact with anyone, he could give a barked order, and twenty officers, most older than he was, would scramble to do his bidding. The still prevalent Dark Side reminded him of that constantly; here's where his power was, here's where he belonged. This was his home.

But it wasn't. Padawan Skywalker knew enough to realize that this wasn't his home. No matter what the Dark Side was telling him.

They slid into the elevator, and young Skywalker nervously adjusted his collar, having changed out of the Storm Trooper uniform.

"This isn't going to work," Han sighed, rubbing at his temples.

"Shut up! It will so! Just give it a chance, can't you? Just once."

"Kid, if you screw up, once is all I'll physically be able to give you," reminded Solo bitingly.

"I won't screw up," the young Jedi swore. "I promise."

A ding announced that they were on the detention level, and the boy sucked in a nervous breath. Relax. It'll be okay. He knew what he was doing.

The officers at the desk looked up as Luke entered, striding with all his customary arrogance, a stern look on his handsome face. Their jaws dropped, and a few gasped.

"L-Lord Skywalker?" the commander asked hesitantly. "Sir? But…we thought…we were told…."

"I've been working as an undercover spy inside the Rebellion," he brushed off smoothly, scowling. "My absence has been well employed in other activities."

"Yes, sir, of course, but…Why are escorting a prisoner?"

"Rebel leader. I'm interrogating him."

The comprehension dawned on most faces, but quite a few were still pale and unbelieving. The awkward tension was too much for Padawan Skywalker, who snapped – and yet, with a slight patience in his voice – "What is it?"

The commander shifted nervously on his feet, and finally looked up at young Skywalker. "Sir…we were told you'd been murdered."

The shock nearly sent the young Jedi reeling, but he kept his head, remained on his feet. Captain Solo glanced at him with a questioning look on his face.

"Your father seemed to believe it. Does he know you're back yet? Should I call and announce-"

"No! No….Ah, that won't be necessary, commander. It was essential that no one think I was still alive in order to pull off the mission. As you can see, it has been successful because of the misinformation. Now, if you'll excuse me…"

"Of course, sir." The solders saluted, and the boy and his quarry walked smartly past them. Once they had their backs to them, however, Luke and the pirate shared a quick glance. Padawan Skywalker nodded. The smuggler and the Wookie slid their binders off, and whipped around, firing on the startled officers.

Luke raised his own blaster and gulped. "Sorry, commander. I can't let my father know I'm here."

He pulled the trigger, the gun went off, and the commander was sprawled across the desk.

"I think I'm gong to be sick," he moaned, bending down and clutching at his knees to relieve the dizzy sensation in his head.

"Stay with me, kid," cried Han, pulling the dead officer's body off of the communications link. "We aren't out of the woods yet."

Luke finished destroying the cameras before asking "Han…why do they think I'm dead?"

Solo glanced at him. "Sorry, can't say. You're going to have to take that up with your dad or with your Jedi Master. I'm not pretending to understand any of this. Now, let's find the cell this princess of yours is in…"

"I know which cell it is already." Captain Solo gave him a questioning look, and Luke gulped slightly under the scrutiny. "You…just stay here and make sure nothing happens….Han?"

"Yeah?"

"…Think on my question. It…it kind of has me startled."

The pirate nodded. "Yeah…I can understand that."

And he did, too.

…

Leia didn't look up as the door swished open. The figure didn't enter the cell, merely leaned against the door. They didn't know how close the princess was to breaking. Her nerves were shot, her spirits were crushed. She couldn't hold out much longer. She was too afraid to look up.

"So…did you miss me?"

That, however, made her look sharply up. Her jaw dropped as she was met with the sly and smiling figure of Luke Skywalker at the door, arms crossed with a superior attitude. Wait, why was he wearing white?...

"What, no hello kiss?"

"How did you…..But I thought that you…." She stuttered and could not regain her composure.

"Here, I suppose we ought to start this off right, hm? Hello. I'm Luke Skywalker, I'm here to rescue you." He took a few steps into the cell, bowed, and kissed her hand. She was too astounded to be angry about it. And in a way, she was immensely happy to see him. She really didn't hate him. The realization was an astounding one. He was grinning from ear to ear at her as he continued to hold her delicate hand. She hadn't snatched it away yet! He still had a chance at this! She might even love him…

"I'm here with Master Obi Wan Kenobi!" he announced very proudly. "Can your man deliver, or can he deliver?"

"Master Kenobi? Where is he?" Pause. "Luke, you're not my man."

Despite the fact that the situation was pressed for time, he embraced her very happily. "Of course I am! See? You even called me by my first name and everything." A very forceful shove at him queued the young Jedi to let the girl go, and, still grinning he did so. "I missed you," he admitted, quite serious.

"Can we just go now, please?" she begged, blushing, feeling intensely uncomfortable.

"Whatever you want," he appeased, stepping out of the doorway so she could leave. "We've got the _Millennium Falcon _waiting for you, and Han's guarding this floor, so we should have just enough time to get out of-"

"Who's Han?"

"All we need to do is find Master Obi Wan."

…

"He's here," he'd said. Beyond a shadow of a doubt, Darth Vader had known that Obi Wan Kenobi was on board the Death Star. He'd come on board the rickety vessel they'd snared. The one that had blasted out of Mos Eisley. He was busy at work, he could sense that, but he was also busy hiding and defending something….But what?

It felt quite a lot like….

He'd felt so sure that Kenobi was dead. If a dead man could walk, then wasn't it at all possible that….

_Don't think about it, _he'd instructed. The work he was about to do would require his full attention.

He was going to enjoy this moment very much. So very, very much….He'd been waiting for it ever since that day, seventeen years ago….

The figure at the end of the passage stopped in its tracks. It didn't seem startled, maybe a bit wary, but entirely expectant of the opponent that awaited it.

"I've been waiting for you, Kenobi," purred Vader in a voice that just dripped with sweet justice. He wanted the man to tremble and bleed and fall at his feet begging for mercy. He wanted him to burn! To know the pain and feel the blistering heat. Well, he couldn't have that, but he'd be damned if he wasn't going to drag his former master through as much torture as he possibly could. Just like Luke had promised he would, if he'd ever gotten the chance. He was doing this for his son, too.

"We meet again, at last. When I left you, I was but the learner. Now I am the master. When I last fought you, you were trying to kidnap my son from me."

Obi Wan stiffened, shaking his head. "I never did anything I didn't think was for the best. And it wasn't best for Luke to be raised by you."

"Shut up!" he swiftly ordered, taking an angry step closer, flicking his black cape behind him. "You bastard, you treacherous scum! What right have you to decide what's best for him? I sired that boy, I raised him to be the most powerful Lord of the Sith in history! No one else did! It was all me, it was always me! What help were you anytime I needed you?"

"Anakin, please, I-"

"Don't call me that! I'm not your apprentice anymore. You had no right to Luke. Never. None. I'm his father. You're not his father."

"I think he might heavily contest that."

Vader seriously paused a beat. "What are you talking about?" He shook his head. "You're just a crazy, weak, old man now. That's what you'll die as. Just a whimpering dog."

"Don't make too many assumptions, Vader," he said coolly, drawing his saber. "It's not over yet."

"Yes it is. For you, it is."

They ignited their sabers. They began fighting. A grand and glorious destiny was reaching its peak.

**To Be Continued…**

Myotismon13: Yeah, you'll feel even worse for him next chapter, I guarantee it.

xInuyashaxangelx: Thanks, I needed something to wrap it up. Worked pretty nicely.

Fire Spirit: Thanks! Just a little something that refused to leave me alone. Well, actually, it's a pretty big something, but…

Asato-Chan: They're getting along better now that they've beaten the snot out of each other. –shrug and sigh- What can I say? They're guys.

Vivid Butterfly: Actually, I wouldn't bother. My dad doesn't let me use IM. Sorry. But I'm glad you like it! You can feel free to send me an e-mail, if you like! Good ol' slow e-mail….I love it so.

Annmarie Aspasia: I was debating for a while if I wanted Luke to stick to the Storm Trooper outfit, but I thought that was too easy. Besides that's not Lord Skywalker's style!

MJ Mink: Unstable anything is fun! Like chemicals….

TorontoBatFan: o.O? You know, the only explanation for the shirt collar thing is that it was late on Sunday night and that I was typing when I should have been in bed. You catch everything, don't you? I wish I was that observant. As for why he didn't dress as a Storm Trooper, there was some method to my madness there. Luke needed to find out that his daddy thought he was dead. And that's how it gets explained. He goes bonkers and has a real long talk about it with Leia later.

Schnickledooger: My only advice to you is never hear "Dentist," from Little Shop of Horrors. As for your scene, it is, by far and large, the favorite of the ones you have sent me. Very interesting.

Beka Darko: Writing is a drug far more addictive than crack cocaine.


	15. Part 1 Chapter 14

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Fourteen**

"You can't win, Darth. If you strike me down, then I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine."

The humming clash of lightsabers was distinctively heard as the opponents pressed relentlessly against the other's blade. _Swish, slash, flash, crash! _Attack after attack fell like acid rain, relentless and swift, and entirely focused. However, they both gasped and stopped as a glittering presence in the Force suddenly burst into the hanger adjacent to their battleground.

"Master Obi Wan?

_Force, Luke, no…._He'd wanted his beloved apprentice to be as far away as possible when the final day of judgment came. _Please…go…please, just go!_

Lord Vader had stopped breathing. He'd stopped moving. Terrible and frightening delight had suddenly flooded his senses as he saw the young man. It couldn't be! It wasn't possible! But he was so glad that it was obviously possible! The pained look on Obi Wan's face made it clear that he saw the beautiful and ghostly vision of his only boy too.

"Luke! What are you doing?" senator Organa had screamed, but Luke seemed not to hear her. Instead, suddenly terrified for the one person he cared more about than anyone in the entire universe, he'd drawn his lightsaber and was charging foreword.

Two voices suddenly screamed at the top of their lungs "Luke, no!" It was both Leia and Kenobi. The former was too petrified to move, whilst the later had enough sense to act. Raising his hand, he focused, and Luke suddenly found himself tossed painfully far back. Sliding on the smooth, glossy floor, he winced as his bruises and soars were knocked roughly.

Shakily, he got to his feet, confused, heart aching. What was he doing? Why was he fighting his father? What if he lost? What if he died? Had he even thought about what would happen to Luke then?

_Master Obi Wan, please!_

_Get out of here! _was the stern reprimand, and the old man shook his head, a pained expression on his lined and wearied face. There was a pause as master and apprentice shared a deep and secret look of pain and love. _Please. For everything I ever taught you. Go._

Vader was so angered by the emotions he sensed radiating off his opponent – how dare he express such love for his son? His son was his enemy! – that, without a thought, he swiped his lightsaber, and the Jedi disappeared completely.

"No!"

Leia had grabbed the frozen Padawan Skywalker's arm, and was tugging furiously. "Luke, he's gone, there's nothing you can do!"

"Blast the door, kid!" Han was screaming from the ship.

Vader shared a look with his son, expecting him to rush to him in joy for finally being freed from his captor. Instead, he was met with something which startled and frightened him entirely….hate. He wasn't given words of ever lasting love, or apology for hurting his father so terrible. Instead, all he got was…

_How could you do this to me?_

Vader began taking a few steps in his son's direction, when the boy suddenly ripped the blaster from his belt, firing with slightly clumsy shots; his eyes were full of tears. He forced the hate, the Darkness, down and focused on the Light. Using the Light Side of the Force, the blasts hit their target, and the door began to slam shut. Senator Organa had to drag the distraught boy up the gangplank and onto the ship.

…

"There she is."

"You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought."

Solo wheeled in order to reply sarcastically, but Luke stepped in between the warring factions. "Will you stop fighting?"

It worked. Leia was temporarily distracted. "Luke, what happened to your eye?" She reached up and her fingers gingerly brushed it. Luke winced, and quickly snatched her hand away.

"Don't touch it."

He was holding her hand again. Oh, wow….Ah, um….

"Jeeze, Chewie, I think I'm going to be sick," Captain Solo grumbled to his companion. "Okay, lovebirds, let's break it up and get going."

"We're not lovebirds!" Leia furiously contradicted with a stamp of her foot.

"Sure we are…" Luke said, a rather stupid and happy smile on his face.

Leia just glared at him. "Seriously. Knock it off, Luke."

"Knocking it off."

"Here's our chance. C'mon, let's go."

Without a thought, the trio rushed into the hanger. Until the sound of clashing sabers distracted Luke. Leia hung back and looked behind her shoulder to see what he was staring at.

"Master Obi Wan?"

Luke's heart was being ripped out of his chest as the moment passed in brief chaos. He raised his saber, he rushed his father, intent on defending his beloved mentor, when he was suddenly pushed back. In the blink of an eye, he realized what the old Jedi was really saying in the meaningless words he was telling the boy; he was really saying goodbye.

Luke wasn't to be stopped. He began to rush foreword again, when his father – he despised him! He would never call him by the title "father," ever again! Never! Master Obi Wan was his father! – suddenly and swiftly murdered the one thing Luke cared about more than anything in the entire world.

In a haze, he angrily looked his father in the eye, didn't even feel Leia's insistent tugging on his arm.

_Luke? _His father asked in all joy.

_How could you do this to me? _Was the only reply he could muster, his soul breaking into a million pieces. He fired at the door, and allowed himself to be led up the ramp.

…

It was extremely lucky for Luke and Leia that the pirate had enough of a head on his shoulders to take charge of the situation. "Chewie," she shouted, rushing to the cockpit, "let's get out of here!" As soon as the door to the _Falcon _was closed, Luke had slid to the floor, sobbing his eyes out. In terrible heart ache and compassion, Leia collapsed next to him, embracing him tightly and soothingly.

"I'll kill him!" he vowed, turning to claw at the door, as though it could do some good. "I'll murder him, I'll butcher him!"

"Luke, stop, it won't do any good now!"

"How could he do this to me? How did he ever call himself my father? I _hate_ him!"

"Don't say that! You know that hate will destroy you!"

"Don't rob my of my hate," he turned, his eyes puffy and red, begging her. "Please, don't rob me of my hate, it's all I have!"

"Let it go, Luke. You've got to let it go!"

"I can't! I tried…I tried so hard, but I can't do it! Not with my master gone! Oh, Force, Leia what am I going to do? I'm all alone, I've got no where to go and no one to run to….He promised me he'd never leave me! He promised me he wouldn't let the Dark Side take me back. How can he keep his promise? He's gone…I'll never get him back."

"No," she shook her head, grabbing his chin and forcing him to look her in her own tear filled eyes. "You don't loose someone just because they died. They live in your heart…He's in your heart, Luke."

"How? How can you expect me to believe that? I can't! No one ever tells me the truth, everyone always lies to me. Why do people have to tell lies?"

"Usually it's because they want something and they're afraid the truth won't get it for them."

"Do you tell lies to me?"

They stared into each other's eyes for a moment. "No," she said, very softly. And before she could do anything to stop him, Luke had pulled her against him and was passionately kissing her. At first too surprised to do much of anything, she was soon struggling, and the boy reluctantly released her. "Don't. Please, don't. We're not going to like where this will go."

"No, I think I'll like it very much." He leaned in to kiss her again, but she backed away from him, shaking her head.

"Please, Luke. These things you want me to feel for you….Maybe someday. Not yet. I know you're scared, I know you're lonely, but that isn't enough of a reason for me to do something like this."

"I am in love with you, Leia Organa," he stated firmly, having stopped his tears. "Wildly, passionately. You don't know how long I've been thinking about you. I love you so much. Just being around you is intoxicating."

She was slightly stunned by the small speech, and helped him stand up. "You don't mean that."

"I do. I always will."

"No," she denied again, leading him toward the cabins. "You don't. You're not thinking clearly right now. You need some sleep. Here, I'll get some ice for your eye, you lie down. Just take a break, take a nap. Okay?"

He sat down on one of the bunks, but continued to watch her. "Please," she begged. "Don't do that."

"Why?"

"It makes me uncomfortable. Now lie down and get some rest."

"Whatever you say, Leia."

He lied down, a few tears occasionally sliding from his tired eyes. And he thought about his master, and he thought about her.

**To Be Continued…**

Myotismon13: Sad, sad chapter, idn't? By the way, I was looking at your user look up thingy, and I saw the summary for that AU Phantom of the Opera. All I can say is "Wow!" and that it is something I am definitely going to have to read whenever my schedule clears up. So, you know, expect a review of it in a couple decades.


	16. Part 1 Chapter 15

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Fifteen**

"Luke, please, don't cry like that."

_Mother?…._

"Hush, now, it's alright. Mommy's got you. You're safe…."

_Mother…no, wait…come back…please! Don't leave me alone again!_

He was wandering down a dark hall. At the end there was a door, and light spilled out the cracks. The light seemed inviting. He moved towards it. The moth to the flame. He always seemed to be moving out of darkness and into light now. It was becoming habitual. He didn't know why, but he was tightly gripping his lightsaber, his old one. The one rusting on Tatooine. Let it rust. He hated it. And he was wearing his old clothes. He didn't question it. His fingers tightened mechanically as he moved closer and closer to the door, before finally taking one hand off the weapon and opening it. Now let come whatever awaited him on the other side!

The room was full of light. And a very, very beautiful woman, cradling a small child who was sobbing hysterically.

"I know, you miss her already, don't you?"

Miss who? He gathered through some instinctive knowledge that the woman that was cradling the babe was his mother. Was it the Force, guiding his dream? He didn't know, but he did know that the swaddled bundle in the beautiful girl's arm's was him.

"You haven't even gone yet, but you're already crying," she gently scolded the infant. She settled into a chair, humming a very familiar tune. "Stop, please. You'll make me start to cry." "Start," was redundant. Glossy tears were already sliding down the perfect, pale cheeks, and Luke let the lightsaber drop – soundlessly – and crossed the room to the woman. Very gently, he brushed away her tear. She didn't notice.

"Please don't cry," he repeated to her. "I don't like seeing women cry." She didn't seem to hear, or otherwise was continuing to cry to spite him.

"What can I do to make you feel better, hm?" she asked the bundle, quite oblivious to the young man's presence. "How about a lullaby, how does that sound?"

"It sounds very nice," Luke said, beginning to pace as he watched the woman in the chair.

"There's a song in ev'ry silence/ Seeking word and melody;/ There's a dawn in ev'ry darkness/ Bringing hope to you and me./ From the past will come the future;/ What it holds, a mystery/ Unrevealed until its season/ Something Fate alone can see."

The woman's tears had only increased, and she'd turned her beautiful face upward, praying to something entirely unknown. Luke brushed back a lock of her fine dark hair – which seemed very familiar – and kissed her forehead. "It'll be alright," he promised. "Please don't cry anymore."

"Padmè?"

A figure had just rushed into the room, looking very wearied, and not a little harried. Luke stopped breathing.

"Master…"

But Master Obi Wan was dead! But…so was his mother, so….

Luke wasn't thinking about that. He'd rushed foreword, arms extended. "Master, oh Force, you don't know how you frightened me." He didn't note that this Obi Wan was seventeen years younger than the one who had just died mere hours before. It didn't seem relevant. "Please, promise me you won't go again. I don't think I can take it. I-"

Kenobi rushed right through his apprentice – literally through – and to the woman, obviously Padmè Amidala; Luke's mother. Startled, Luke fell back. He tried to reach out to the man again, desperate to embrace him, and was met with nothing but air. "Master?" he begged. He couldn't hear him either.

"Padmè," continued the man, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder, "the transport's going to leave soon. If we're going to be on it, we've got to go, now!" Wait, why were they going? Mother? Master? No, wait….

"I know, I'm just…saying goodbye…." Was she abandoning him? But….Master Obi Wan said that she'd adored him! "You'll take good care of him, won't you?" The dream made sense to the unconscious mind the way all dreams do. Waking, Luke never would have understood the transpiring events.

"You know I will," pledged the Jedi, opening his arms for the baby. Very gently, the mother laid her treasure into the other man's arms, still crying. "He's….he's so little!"

"Of course, he's a baby."

"He's got his father's-" He stopped. That was a subject neither wanted to breach.

_What? What! What do I have?_

"I promise," continued the rather chocked up Obi Wan. "I won't let anything happen. I promise."

She nodded. "I know."

The man smiled, and the woman stood. Very briefly, he kissed her forehead with affection in the same spot that Luke just had, before turning and rushing out the door.

The scene melted. Blackness came.

"In our end is our beginning;/ in our time, infinity….."  
The transport was crowded, dirty, and, above all, panicked. But not the man and the babe. They remained huddled, and Luke stood by them, trying to offer some protection, trying to change the baby's fate.

_Please, please, let me grow up with Master Obi Wan. Say this was all a dream…Say that it never happened…please…_

"In our doubt there is believing;/ in our life, eternity./" The deep, soft voice comforted the sniffling child, and Luke felt his mind go hazy. The image faded, but he clung to it desperately. "In our death, a resurrection;/ At the last, a victory…/"

_Mother?...Master, don't leave me! _Darkness coming. Not much time. Leaving soon.

"Unrevealed until its season," sang the man, quite oblivious, as he faded farther and farther from sight. "Something Fate alone can see…."

_Wait…._

…

Luke's eyes snapped open. Very calmly, he folded his arms behind his head and sighed. He vaguely wondered how long he'd been asleep for. He seemed to recall having dreamt, but most of it was quite fleeting. It twisted and weaved, but it never stayed. He couldn't say the same for nightmares. As a child, he'd had terrible nightmares that had faded with time. Until Tatooine. Once he'd touched Tatooine's surface, he was plagued by such awful nightmares as to make his skin crawl. Master Obi Wan had comforted, counseled, and analyzed them with Luke, calming the boy considerably. His father had never done that.

He swung his legs over the edge of the bunk and waited for the sleepy haziness of his senses to clear a little more. Getting up, he just sort of wandered, and found that his feet carried him – instinctively – in the direction of the cockpit without Luke so much as thinking about it.

In a blink of an eye, his senses caught a white blur, and his arms reached out, snaring the princess. For an awkward moment, they just sort of stood there, both rather embarrassed that Luke was holding onto her without even actually having made a pass. Fate was funny like that.

Leia stepped back, and Luke was quite certain she was sniffling a little. He reached out to her again, but she didn't budge. "Your friend's quite a mercenary," she huffed, dabbing at her big, beautiful, brown eyes. "I wonder if he really cares about anything, or anybody."

"I care!" Luke protested, and Leia, who was about to sweep past him, paused.

"Yeah, I know." They stood there like that, and Luke looked at the floor while Leia looked at him. "Did you mean what you said about having no place to go?"

He nodded. "I _don't _want to go back to Tatooine. I _can't _go back to Coruscant. I….I don't know where _to _go."

"We've….we've got a base," she slowly admitted, finally seeming to decide to trust him entirely. "Pretty big rebel outpost. I…I know you're second in line to the Imperial throne, but I thought that…what with…Look, if you could see your way to helping us out…you don't know what it would mean to me." He perked up at that. "You…you could tip the scales, Luke! You could give us a chance! Could you just think it over?"

"I'll go!"

Startled, she blinked. "What?"

"I'll go wherever you want me to go. Just let me be with you. That's all I ask."

"Luke…It's not going to be like _that_."

"I know. But…but maybe someday, like you said…You could see your way through to looking at me in a different light. I'm not such a bad guy if you give me a chance."

She quickly leaned over and kissed his cheek, which made his insides melt. "You're not such a bad guy with or without a chance. In fact, I think you're really sweet."

_Can't…complete…sentences…brain…no longer…functioning properly….Sigh…_

She turned and walked off, leaving Luke to stew for a minute. Wow….Wow….Just…Wow. He was really, really, really happy. Life wasn't good, but it had a chance at becoming that way again.

**To Be Continued….**

_Wow! I can't believe I'm almost through ANH already! How long has it been? Three months? Four? I thought it would take a lot longer. I'm really excited about this! Well, we're hardly out of the woods yet, so please stick with me! I have abandonment issues, and a fear that people will suddenly flame me and say that my story is crap (The review from "Bill," is a good example of where I get this from.) So, your reviews are really encouraging! If I don't' update this for a week, it's only because I've got an awesome concept for "Where You Were Going To," that I'm going to type out. That, and I have a massive report due in English. I thank you all for your love and support. You don't know what your feedback means to me!_

TorontoBatFan: When I wrote that one, I was on such a high from it that I immediately started writing the next one. However, I like to answer at least one review, and so, when I went to post the next chapter, I had a review from Myotismon13! Quite lucky. So, I answered it, and popped the next one in. So, that's a very round about way of saying when the next chapter would be up. This one we interesting to do. It didn't work out like I'd hoped it would, but the results are still nice.

Alabama would be nice….-shudder- It _would _be smart for Luke to go to Degobah. But this is Luke. And he follows at Leia's heels like a puppy. So, if and when he does go to Degobah, he's going to rip his hair out: Stay with his "fiancé," or listen to his master/"father." Don't you just want to bonk him on the head?

Myotismon13: Actually, that's exactly what happened!

xInuyashaxangelx: Yes, poor, mentally disturbed Luke.

Schnickledooger: Sorry. I didn't like doing it, either. But it had to be done. Otherwise Luke wouldn't be going off to the Rebellion. He wouldn't have a reason. He'd be too busy training as a Jedi.

Vivid Butterfly: I'm really glad you like it that much! I was afraid I'd lost some readers a few chapters back when Luke became a Jedi. However, I got an e-mail from a fan who never reviewed on this site, and so I figure the ratio of people who read versus review is pretty high. I'm not too worried!


	17. Part 1 Chapter 16

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Sixteen**

**A.N.: Quick little note – sorry if I end up butchering Mara Jade. My experience in writing her is nilch, excluding the one shot of her twelve years old in "Where You Were Going To." Please feel free to point out errors or suggest literature I could read in order to improve upon her the next time I set down to write a little something with her in it. **

He was still deciding if he was quite willing to walk through that door. Doubtless, it needed doing. But it would mean admitting something to his master that he hadn't readily admitted to himself yet. He didn't want to. Facing that reality was…torture. No matter what he told himself, he just couldn't face what all the evidence was pointing to. He preferred the illusion that it hadn't actually happened….. It just wasn't fair!

Darth Vader was sternly clutching the late Obi Wan Kenobi's lightsaber – to be laid at his master's feet. An offering of sorts, a buffer for the news he'd deliver. He'd briefly pondered handing over Luke's discarded weapon as well. After all, events had made it entirely too clear that Luke was now his enemy. Even if he wasn't dead, it was still an option. After all, he was dead to his father, wasn't he? Lord Skywalker was dead, the rebel boy wasn't his son. Was he? But his heart denied that so strongly….

That was the worst part of all. Luke would never stop being his son. No matter what. He'd adored that boy for seventeen years, only to see him cruelly snatched from his loving hands. The greatest Sith Lord in history! And all because of Vader's training, not some damn Jedi Knight! But that wasn't why he felt so heartsick, and he knew it. However unwilling he was to admit that he'd lost more than a star protégé, the Dark Lord knew that the wound extended far beyond that.

He'd lost his boy….his baby boy, who'd grown up far too fast, and left far too soon.

The Lord of the Sith almost would have preferred it if he were dead.

Taking a deep breath, he slowly put one foot in front of the other, and walked through the door, Obi Wan's lightsaber in hand.

Mara Jade was busily putting on a brief show of what her latest cycle of training and meditation had helped her accomplish, and the Sith Lord waited impatiently for the girl to finish. Her magenta blade off, Jade had sunk to the ground on one knee, her fiery hair cascading over her shoulders.

A vicious smile spread across Palpatine's yellow teeth as he rubbed his wrinkled hands together in anticipation of what he could now accomplish with his favorite assassin. "Very good, my Hand. But, I sense that it is not coming quite as easily as you promised me it would. Perhaps you have not been working as hard as you said you have?"

"Forgive me, my Master," she panted, still trying to regain her breath after the surprisingly tedious exercise. "I have been trying."

"Yes…" the emperor muttered. "And you will try again. If it is not better by the next time I ask, I shall not be pleased. Do you understand?"

"Perfectly," she replied, lowering her head a little more. She quickly rose and moved to the side as Vader now took center stage.

"I have killed the Jedi Obi Wan Kenobi, my Master," he said with relish. Mara could never top that, and she was clearly quite astonished. Everyone else – including herself – was certain he had been dead already. "I present his lightsaber to you." Rising from his kneeling position, he proffered the grizzly trophy, and came close enough for Palpatine to quickly snatch it up, caressing it greedily. Jade was watching the Dark Lord of the Sith in pure envy, crossing her arms and pursing her red lips.

"Very good, Lord Vader! Excellent news….but….." Darth Vader stiffened instinctively, awaiting. "I sense a great unrest. You have news for me." It was not a question. Lord Vader had better have news for the emperor, or else he was hiding something, and that was rife for vengeance.

Vader's breathing was heavy, but even, and he tightly shut his eyes – unseen, as it always was – for a moment. He could make up a story on the spot…but no….Luke's treachery exceeded all bounds. He'd raised arms against his sire in defense of a heretic Jedi. Whatever he got, he deserved. The Dark Lord could not save him this time.

"It has been brought to my attention…" he began nervously, "that….Lord Skywalker has betrayed us." There. He'd spat it out. Whatever happened now the Lord of the Sith was entirely not responsible for.

Mara Jade could do nothing to stop the astonished gasp, her hands falling to her sides, staring. Emperor Palpatine's grip on the lightsaber tightened in a very distasteful manner.

"What?" he asked very slowly.

"That's impossible," the Emperor's Hand smoothly denied, nervously brushing some of the red hair out of her face. She laughed apprehensively, nervously plucking at her sleeve. "You're wrong," she flat out stated, shaking her head. "You're wrong."

"When did you find this out?" the emperor asked, entirely ignoring his favorite assassin.

"Yesterday. I came back to Coruscant as soon as I could in order to tell you. I am due back at the Death Star as soon as you have no need of me."

"I'm telling you, you're wrong!" Jade shouted, taking a leery step foreword.

"And what events transpired to bring you to this conclusion? It was my understanding that you thought your son dead, Lord Vader."

"I thought he was."

"What happened?"

"What are you saying? Can you even hear yourself?"

"I discovered him on board the Death Star aiding the Jedi in an attempt to help Princess Organa escape. When I tried to stop Kenobi, Lord Skywalker tried to go to the late Obi Wan Kenobi's aid. He failed – since I killed him on the spot – and instead of returning to his rightful place, ran off with the princess and their accomplice. Even now our homing device is tracking them."

"This is very disturbing," Palpatine said, his eyebrows raised as he tapped his fingers together.

"Luke would never-"

Mara Jade had broken from her spot at the side and rushed to the Sith Lord. They wheeled on each other, angrily snapping. It seemed like they would come to blows.

"Forgive me," he snarled, "if I don't think I know my own son better than you do, Jade."

"You obviously don't know him well enough. Luke wouldn't…It couldn't have been-"

"If you had been there then you would have known the exact same truth I know!"

"I don't believe you!"

"Both of you, stop this at once!"

It was an order not to be disobeyed, as the booming voice proved only too clearly, and both parties dropped to their knees immediately in humble reverence. Anger radiated off of them, and they shared a common glare even prostrated before the emperor.

"Lord Vader," he began slowly, "if what you say is true, then by no means must young Skywalker be allowed to live." The shock passed over the pair like a small wave, and fled just as quickly. "I want him killed on sight."

"Y-yes….my master." The reluctance was all to clear. "But if he could be turned….He already has a taste for the Dark Side, he cannot run from it forever. Besides which, it would be seventeen years of very hard and devoted training wasted."

"And do you feel you have worked too hard to have it wasted?" sneered Palpatine. But the Dark Lord of the Sith was willing to rise to the bait on this one occasion only.

"My Master, forgive me, please, but yes. He is very….valuable." That, at least, didn't sound too sentimental. "All I need is a little free reign and I will turn him, I swear it."

The sound of his breathing was the only thing heard for a moment before Palpatine finally spoke. "Alright, Lord Vader, you will have your time. But only if and when it pleases me. If I become bored of this little venture of yours, I will end it very quickly, and you will not protest, agreed?"

"Yes, my Master."

"Good. You both may go."

The pair thanked him in unison and rose to go. Once out the door, Mara stopped and stared at his back for a moment. "You can't kill him," she finally said, and he stopped in his tracks.

"Of course I can kill him," snarled Darth Vader. "I raised him, I know all of his weaknesses. I can kill him."

"No, that's not what I mean. You are quite capable of killing him….But you won't. I…I can't let you."

He turned slightly, and for a moment, said nothing. "Careful, Jade. Or you'll discover just how painful it is to have bonds broken. Take some advice and leave off the path before it starts."

"Don't be stupid," she protested. "He's your son. Doesn't that mean something to you?"

"Should it?"

"I'd like to think so."

"Then you're a fool. He means nothing to me."

She shook her head, causing a lock of her fire hair to fall into her green eyes. "No. I still don't believe you."

**To Be Continued…**

_Wow, great response for the last chapter! That's really encouraging!_

xInuyashaxangelx: -big smile- Thanks! Here's the promised update

Annmarie Aspasia: Actually, Leia explains why she trusts Luke in…probably the next chapter, I don't know. That might take a while. As for the advice on flames, thanks. It's good logic, and logic is the best way for me to tackle my insecurities.

Schnickledooger: I think Luke would be scarred for life if he found out that way.

Padfoot Reincarnated: Yeah a new fan! I love those! Well, I'm glad you like it. Hope you enjoy the ones to follow.

5canto: Wow, I'm sure your English is a lot better than mine…let me take a wild guess: Spanish? No? German? Ah, Italian? Well, foreign language of some kind. Well, I'm glad you like it, and hope you will continue to read it! Your support is very nice.

TorontoBatFan: Oh, be careful there. Remember, this is AU. And, as Obi Wan said to Luke I don't know how many chapters ago "How old was I when my mother died?" "Two." Now, would Kenobi lie about that? Doubt it. Is Leia there? Look carefully. I'm not saying she is. I'm not saying she isn't. I'm just saying to think very carefully about it. And I won't tell you if you're right or wrong if you guess.

Well, I know that when I had to turn a guy down (same guy) I told him he was really sweet, and that I didn't want to hurt him. Suffice to say, for my little AU, Luke hasn't seen much of the dating scene beyond a very short tryst with Mara. And that ended up not going so hot.

I definitely agree that Luke won't attach himself to Yoda like he did to Obi Wan. If and when he gets to Dagobah are still entirely up in the air, however.

Myotismon13: Is she his sister? Really? I'm just messing with you, but honestly. Have I said she was? Ooohh… I am so evil. I'll let you torture yourself over that for a while.

Joy4eva: Late reviews are better than no reviews

Cookiemunster: I don't know-y. Nobody-y?…uh, well, that didn't quite work but….

Jedi-lover: Whoot! Glad you loved it enough to read through the whole thing! As a note, I read your Jedi Vignettes, and adored them! I would have reviewed, but the server didn't want to let me…..


	18. Part 1 Chapter 17

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Seventeen**

It was all entirely too easy. Much too easy, and it unsettled Luke, who knew every card the Empire could play. He'd played most of them himself.

"If I were a Sith Lord that had just lost a valuable prisoner that carried master plans for my ultimate weapon, what would I do?" he asked himself seriously. Oh, well, that was easy. Slip a homing device aboard their ship.

So that's what Luke set out to find.

Han could deny it all he like, could puff up his pride in the vessel until he burst, but facts were still facts, and one smuggler could not outwit the entire Imperial Navy.

A son of Skywalker? Well, maybe he could.

Concentrating hard, he searched all the most likely crevices until he found it, flicking on his lightsaber.

"Sorry, Father."

And that was that. Leia found him not too many moments later, and stared curiously from his hand to his face, noting that the lightsaber was still on.

Finally, she asked "What…are you doing?"

"Huh? Oh." He turned his weapon off and shrugged his shoulders. "Dismantling tracking devices."

The princess paled. "What? How many? Does the Empire know where we're going? Where the base is?"

Luke thought for a moment. "We've got about a week. After that, we'd better start packing up and find a new base."

"A week," she whispered in horror. "The…The Death Star, they'll come, won't they?"

Luke darkened. "Oh, most likely."

One of the many things he loved about Leia was that she was filled with such steely resolve in a crisis.

Smacking her fist into the opposite palm, she nodded. "Then we've got to start acting, and fast!"

"Agreed," he said. "One question: What am I going to do?"

…

Skywalker? they'd said. The Sith Lord? they'd exclaimed. It was largely agreed upon that Leia Organa, a respected member of the Rebel High Command, had gone out of her mind.

Patiently, Mon Mothma had asked "But why? What do you see in him? I know he rescued you, but you're far too quick thinking not to see the real possibility for betrayal."

In the end she could not really describe to her esteemed peers what had prompted her to bring Luke right into the heart of the Rebellion.

"If you only saw him. It was like watching someone die, and you knew, you _knew_ it was all too real. He wasn't pretending, he wasn't lying. He was broken and battered, and I had the chance to kick him while he was down."

"So why didn't you?" General Dodonna asked wryly.

Because she couldn't.

Something ineffably drew her to the desperate young man. He wasn't a powerful Sith Lord. He was as weak as a child, sobbing desolately as she held him. A suppliant servant that had laid himself, defenseless, at her feet.

It was as if he had said "I am yours, lead me."

She had a responsibility to him that could never be explained in mere words. It went far too deep for that. To turn away Luke because of who his father was would be like turning away a child. Maybe Leia was going soft, but she couldn't do it.

"He has real talent," she'd argued.

"That we'll see for ourselves," replied General Rieekan, not at all impressed with the turn of events.

"When the Empire comes to butcher us like cattle," confirmed Mon Mothma.

"When young Skywalker betrays us to them?" suggested Dodonna. "With all due respect, Princess, that might be what he is planning."

"I know," she agreed in a whisper. "But it's a chance we've _got_ to take."

Rieekan shrugged. "Your judgment has never been wrong before. Let us hope this is not a bad omen."

…

Well, this was awkward.

Han had bolted to see the person in charge of the Treasury about his reward, and the Wookie had of course gone with him. Leia had explained that she had to talk with the Rebel High Command, and suggested he get something to eat. Eager to please, he'd agreed, and been pointed in the direction of the mess hall.

News traveled fast, and Luke was quite consciously aware of several pairs of eyes boring into him. Not knowing what to do, he'd grabbed a tray and gotten food with everyone else.

Sighing, not knowing who on earth to sit with, he simply picked an empty table, and bent to filling his stomach.

A task which quickly turned out to be more trouble than he deemed it to be worth. A thin sort of oily, grey stew had been sloshed into a greasy tin bowl, accompanied by a chunk of dry looking brown bread, a few pills, and a cup of terrible, if strong, caff.

"Mind if I sit here?"

The sentence astounded Luke enough for him to tear his eyes away from the disgusting stew – which he was sure had made a growling noise in his direction – and to the source of such astonishment.

The sixteen year old smiled cheerfully at him, his darkish brown hair slightly shaggy, his eyes glittering. Luke got such a sense of pure, totally innocent intentions, of genuine good natured-ness as to astound him.

"Uh, yeah, sure." He didn't know what else to say.

The boy set his tray down across from Luke, plopping into the chair. No further contact was established for a some time, as the young man was busily shoveling spoon fulls of the disgusting stew quickly into his mouth before his taste buds got a chance to react. Luke just stared. After a small portion of the food was gone, the boy held out his hand to Luke, still smiling affably.

"Name's Wedge Antilles. Red Two."

Nervously, Luke took the hand. "Uh, Luke Skywalker."

"Oh," Wedge said knowingly. "You're the guy everyone's talking about." Luke shifted nervously in his chair. "Rumor has it you were a wicked pilot."

"I still am," he replied, slightly defensively.

"Great!" exclaimed Wedge, leaving Luke to wonder if he suffered from some sort of malignant disease which rendered his brain impenetrable to the feared and revered name Skywalker, or if he really was just that nice. "Red Five's been out since he screwed up his wrist." He poked at the stew, grimacing. "It's not usually this bad."

"Really?" asked Luke coyly. "The food doesn't usually stare back at you?"

Wedged laugh appreciatively, popping one of the medical pills into his mouth and following it up with some caff. "The Empire caught one of the people who supplies our rations," he explained rather cheerfully for such depressing news, "so the others are lying low for a while. Still, we should be eating better again soon." Wedge quickly downed some caff before rather randomly asking "Ever flown an X-Wing?"

Luke shook his head now, and that started Wedge off about the pros and cons of the attack and defense, and the form of oratory merely made its creator all the more endearing. Finally, however, Luke just had to know the truth.

"Wait, look, hold it. Do you have any idea who I am?"

Wedge glanced at him. "Umm….?"

"Luke Skywalker? _Lord_ Skywalker? Dark Lord of the Sith? Ever heard of me?"

"Oh! Yeah, sure." Wedge went back to eating.

Luke blinked. "And that doesn't bother you?"

"Should it?"

Luke was utterly speechless as Wedge nonchalantly bit off a hunk of bread. "Well…but I thought…"

Wedge swallowed, grinning again. "Well, sure, you were a Lord of the Sith. But you're one of us now, right?"

Comprehension slowly dawned on Luke as he blinked, a grin spreading across his face. "Yeah. I'm one of you."

Wedge's smile grew wider. "So where's the problem?" He turned briefly in his seat to call "Hey, Biggs, come over here, there's this cool guy I want you to meet!" A black haired, mustachioed youth came trotting over, and Luke was washed over with a sudden wave of unexplainable warmth.

"Hey, Luke, this is Biggs Darklighter. Biggs, this is Luke Skywalker."

"Hello," Luke responded sheepishly.

Biggs seemed only slightly surprised by the name, and smoothed it over quickly, extending a hand. "Hey," he replied nonchalantly.

He seemed oddly familiar. "Have we met before?"

Biggs blinked. "No, I don't think so."

"Luke here's a really neat guy," Wedge explained to the black haired companion, and Luke smiled broadly.

He was Wedge's man _forever_. They would be close, practically best friends. And Luke speculated that Wedge was one of the first people who had ever accepted him totally and completely for who he was, not who he was supposed to be.

**To Be Continued….**

_Wow, over a month without updates! I greatly apologize! I do have an explanation, however. The last two weeks of school were jammed packed with finals. The week after school I went camping. So what have I been doing for the last two weeks?_

_Homework._

_Yeah, I have to take Health online (I didn't fail; I've been taking it since last May. It's complicated.) and Drivers Ed. I have to be only person who is PAYING to do homework in summer. And let me tell ya, it sucks._

_That, and I've been hanging out with friends._

_On a different note, I got some great response for the last chapter and for Where You Were Going To. And tons of new fans, too! You are all so cool, and I love you all very, very, very much! Now that I'm out of my writers block, I'll get cracking so I can hopefully finish up ANH very soon. Without further ado, let's answer reviews!_

Myotismon13: But we all know Vader. Far too stubborn to see the logic behind Mara. –nodnod-

xInuyashaxangelx: Sorry it took so long! I wanted to write, but I was really lazy. I didn't work on anything for ages! Here's the long awaited chapter!

Jedi-lover: Luke's very thick headed when it comes to women. As for Leia, this chapter explains most of it. The Force relaying their link as twins, possibly? But that only applies if they are twins, and there is no evidence to suggest they are. Or is there? (I am soooo evil! –big grin-)

Snowgurl54: Thanks!

Annmarie Aspasia: Ah, glad I didn't butcher. Thanks

Vivid Butterfly: I am sooo sorry I haven't updated recently

Schnickledooger: Actually….that might not be too far from the truth…..Luke drunk? Gonna happen? Oh yeah, and it's gonna be shweet.

Cookiemunster: Ah, sorry, no death to Jade in this story. However, I can assure you that she is not important to the story as a whole. Major plot twist involving her at the very end (as if Luke wasn't already psycho enough). But otherwise, she's going to show up in the main body of the story twice. Maybe. Sideline she'll show up maybe three times, but that is it. Very, very little involvement. Luke will actually only see her twice, so there's very little to confuse him there. So, glad you liked Palpatine, and hope you'll keep reading

Kai Organa: Thanks! Now instead of innocent farm boy Luke I bring you twisted and demented Luke who should seriously consider therapy!

TorontoBatFan: Mara _adores_ Luke. He's just too thick to notice. Thanks again for another one of your fabulous reviews

PrincessSkywalkerOrgana: You know, I'm pretty fond of Obi myself. Damn, wish I hadn't killed him. Thanks for the support, always loved!

Beka Darko:…..What?...Ah….Well, erm…..I'm afraid this is all very sudden….Maybe we should get to know each other first as friends…long distance friends…..-sneaks off-

Virginia Riddle-Malfoy: Yeah, poor Ani is pretty pathetic and depressing when he's all angsty. Well, no promises. Luke would probably feel more disposed to adoring his father again if he hadn't, you know, punched holes in Obi Wan. Hey, simple mistake. I mean, my dad leaves huge holes in all my teachers come conference time….Ah….my sad, sad attempt at humor…Well, hope you liked it anyway Vader gets a big moment in the angsty spotlight very, very soon, I can assure you. But yes, he does love Luke very, very, VERY much.

Moojuice Nne of the Mayonaisse: I know what you mean. I love bad guys, too. Take Chauvelin from The Scarlet Pimpernel. God knows I love Percy to death, but dangle a Chau Chau plushie in my face and I become very inhuman. Sorry it took so long for me to update, and I hope you'll stick around for more.

Insane Pineapple from Naboo: As if he isn't already traumatized enough? Thanks very much.

HermioneSkywalker: Stop, I'm blushing! Really? That's very sweet. Remember that when I write a novel. I am forcing all of you to buy copies.

darth mojo rising: Hey, glad you liked it! And thanks, the reviews are always appreciated.

BlackPhoenix667: Hey, I don't blame you. I've done the same thing. I'm just really glad you gave it another shot. Truthfully, I can't stand evil Luke. It makes me sick. But they're just sooo tempting to read, and the idea of Vader being a father was sooo cute. Originally, it was just going to be a one shot, ending where it ended in the prologue with Vader secretly adoring his son while never being able to express it. Why I continued, I honestly can't say, but I am so glad I did. And I am also so glad you liked it. Hopefully you'll like this chapter, too.

_Yikes! Look at all those reviews! That's the best response yet! And not a single bad response! – passes out free brownies – I love you all so very much! I'll keep writing soon. I might even have a new chapter up for you by tomorrow! Loves and kisses – Shadow13_


	19. Part 1 Chapter 18

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Eighteen**

"Oh, wow, did you _see_ his score?"

"That's amazing!"

"That's impossible."

His cheeks flushed from the exercise, Luke climbed out of the flight simulator, only to discover small mob had formed. Surprised and confused, his instinct was to retreat, but he was dragged into the mass of pilots, all tussling his hair or playfully punching his shoulder until he was sure he was riddled with bruises.

He was in paradise.

Grinning and breathless, he met face after face, some he recognized, other's not.

Finally, Wedge asked, "Where did you learn to _fly _like that?"

Easy and nonchalantly, Luke still grinned as he replied, "Oh, well, my father taught me to-" He clamped his jaw shut, ducking his head slightly, his ears starting to burn. Why did he have to open his stupid mouth?

A momentary and heavy silence hung in the air, the imposing reminder of who Luke – who's simulator scores had made him officially one of them, a pal, a comrade – was really the son of. Luke's blood was as inescapable as his mastery of the Force. His name, his face, his words and deeds were forever linked to the emperor he had now vowed to destroy, and the father that had raised him – only one of the most feared men in the galaxy. Should he be ashamed of who he was, who had raised him? His father had taught him to be nothing but proud. The Skywalkers were a family that defied the odds, were constantly destined for great things. Thinking of his father made Luke wonder if the man missed him at all. Probably not.

But for his part, Luke did miss his father, if only a little.

Feeling responsible, Wedge quickly shifted the conversation and the focus and everyone was soon babbling excitedly again, and Luke was lovingly pushed around like a rag doll until he was sure his spine would break. Someone said that he needed to be fitted for a uniform while others talked about finding him an X-Wing to pilot. He answered questions in a daze and smiled politely at compliments.

He'd never been happier.

…

"Young Skywalker certainly does not seem to lack friends," Mon Mothma commented, watching the crowd jostle the confused but happy boy. The mob of pilots had certainly attached themselves to him when they discovered how good he was. Now they'd probably give his personality a chance and end up adoring him. It was sweet, if slightly ironic.

"No," agreed Leia, grinning as she watched him. "I was pretty worried about that, but he's settled in nicely." This looked almost nothing like the sobbing, insecure boy she'd known on board the _Millennium Falcon_, but it pleased her that he could move on from tragedy. That was a handy skill they all had to learn.

After a moment, the elder woman asked "Are you sure this is not all just an act? He hardly seems to lack confidence."

"You should hear him spill his worries at night." Mon Mothma raised an eyebrow and Leia quickly blushed. "I mean…not like _that_. He just needs someone to talk to when he can't sleep, so I lend an ear."

"I know."

"Stop smiling."

"I'm not smiling."

"Yes you are!" cried the exasperated Leia, as her mentor lost the fight to keep the amused smile from off her face.

"He does, however, seem to be extremely fond of you."

"I know, but I'm not of him. Not like that. He's sweet, and he's my friend, but I just don't-"

"No need to explain it to me," soothed Mon Mothma. "We've all been through that sort of situation. Poor thing will just have to suffer through it a while."

"What's this?" It was General Rieekan, come to see why his pilots were congregated around the flight simulator. "Our little Leia breaking hearts?"

"I am not!" she repeated, starting to become agitated.

Rieekan wrapped his arm around her shoulder affectionately, laughing. "Of course you are! _All _the boys make sheep's eyes at you."

"How unfortunate," she replied, giving in and playing the game, "as I only have eyes for you, General."

He laughed again, and Mon Mothma smiled. "You're so flattering." There was a pause as a young officer grabbed Luke's arm and dragged him out of the crowd crying "Come on, we've got to get you measured for a flight suit!" The throng of admirers followed like sheep a shepherd.

Luke, Leia speculated, wasn't exactly a leader adored by his people. It was really a pity, as his shy smiles and handsome face seemed to make him an instant success when he wasn't drowning in the black robes of a Sith Lord. People loved people like Luke when they were actual humans that they could relate to. Such qualities as Luke possessed were despised, however, in a leader. Forgivable flaws in a man, not a god.

Rieekan sized the boy up as he was dragged along, and finally nodded, agreeing with himself on some point. "Lanky, isn't he? Well, good thing there aren't too many tall people on base. However, Princess Organa, you were right about his ability." He could hear the numbers the crowd was so enthralled by and raised an appreciative eyebrow. "He does not seem to lack talent."

"He'll settle in well," agreed Mon Mothma.

"In time," confirmed Leia, "they'll forget he was ever a Lord of the Sith."

A darkening of the mood around her and the tightening of Rieekan's arm around her shoulder startled her, and she looked from one mentor to the other.

"No," he said, shaking his head. "That is one thing they'll never forget."

"But why not?" the eighteen year old princess protested.

"No matter how light hearted he is," agreed Mon Mothma, "young Skywalker will be perpetually marked by a dark cloud. He will forget what he did for his entire life long before his compatriots will."

"But he's not evil!" implored Leia, breaking free of Rieekan's arm so that she could argue the point and stare Luke's attackers in the eye. She didn't know why, but she knew she'd defend him to the death. Maybe because he'd do the same for her. "You saw him, he's not!"

"Agreed," allowed Rieekan, "he is not evil. It is a measure of his character, he is able to act independently from his weakness. But it is still there, and will be forever."

"Why? Why can't he just be like everyone else? None of the people here fighting are perfect."

"But none of them were Lords of the Sith. Leia," Mon Mothma patiently explained like the mother she'd lost, "people don't forget was Imperial Princes do. They murder people, sometimes thousands. Innocent people, men, women, children. It's true of dictatorships throughout all of history, and it is definitely true of young Skywalker."

"But he's changed!"

"In what way? Princess, _we_ are killing people. Even now, we are training people to be murderers. Luke's just stepped into a different type of murder is all."

"But it's different."

"Because they're Imperial soldiers that makes taking life better?"

That gave her pause for thought. Finally, she deliberated "These aren't common, unarmed citizens."

"Leia," pleaded Rieekan, "I'm with you on this, I deplore the taking of life. But we do what we must. We are trading a lesser of two evils. The question isn't who is murdering who, but why? And what sort of person is this?"

"So what you're saying is," Leia divined, "that because of Luke's history of remorseless violence, he is likely to be held more accountable for death than his colleagues. Because he's still a traitor, they'll never fully trust them."

"It is a definite possibility, yes," nodded the elder woman. "The crowd will love him, but they'll never trust him. And if and when the day comes that his character is attacked, will he be able to handle the backlash?"

Leia rubbed at her arms, suddenly feeling very cold. "And here I thought I was helping to save him."

"Your motives in bringing him here were nothing but the best, and it is probably good he came. But you cannot protect him forever. No one can. And believe me, he is old enough and experienced enough to know that. So," Rieekan clapped his hands to end the somber mood, "on that note let us refrain permanent judgment on his person until the true tests arrive."

"Going back to the topic of Skywalker's affection for you," Mon Mothma sighed, "do you think that will change at all now that he's so preoccupied?"

Rieekan grinned. "What's this now? Young Skywalker has taken a fancy to you?" Leia flushed again. "When's the wedding date?"

"I don't like him like that."

"But whom do you like like that?"

The question so stunned Leia that she blushed furiously and in the end had to excuse herself from her companions company. Mon Mothma and Rieekan flashed each other a grin before moving on to separate business of their own.

**To Be Continued….**

_To make up for the gross lack of updates, here's another one. Sorry if my logic is a little weird in this one, it was really late at night when I was writing, and I was tired._

xInuyashaxangelx: Just for you, more.

Schnickledooger: I wanted to write. Several times I thought "I should really sit down and work on fanfiction." Sounded good, but I just never got the inertia to do it. But I saw Episode III again last night, so I just had to. It makes me very excited for when I finally get to delve back into Vader's thoughts again.


	20. Part 1 Chapter 19

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One **

**Chapter Nineteen**

Luke watched him with a scowl on his face, arms crossed, waiting, expectant. Han didn't look up. He just kept right on loading boxes in. The boy flashed a look at the Wookie, a plea to talk some sense into his companion, but he just shrugged his hairy shoulders; Chewbacca had already tried, to no avail.

"All flight troops, man your stations. All flight troops, man your stations."

Luke didn't move, his flight helmet still tucked under his arm. The intercom did not faze Captain Solo in the slightest. He didn't pause for an instant.

"So, that's it, huh?"

Here the pirate finally paused. He straightened his back and stared Luke in the eye.

"Yeah, that's it."

Luke felt a pang in his chest, and he stood slightly taller, puffing out his chest in indignation. "You got your reward and now you're just leaving?"

The smuggler took the tone of having to explain things to a child, which only enraged Luke all the more. "I've got some old debts I gotta pay off with this stuff. Even if I didn't, you don't think I'd be fool enough to stick around here, do ya?" He paused for a moment, cringing slightly under the hot glare of young Skywalker. "Why don't you come with us?" he boldly offered, surprising the boy. "You're pretty good in a fight, we could use you."

Luke sneered, snarled. "You couldn't pay me enough to even consider it. Why don't you take a look around you. Do you have any idea how many pilots aren't going to be coming back?"

"Including yourself?"

He paused. It was a very real possibility. "I'm not afraid."

"Afraid to die? No. But you're afraid of something. And I'm going to find out what."

"The point is," continued Luke, flustered, "We need every man we can get."

"Then get someone else, I'm not going to do it."

"You're turning your back on us!"

"I'm saving my neck!"

Luke gave up, backed down. "Well, take care of yourself, Han. I guess it's what you're best at, isn't it?" Flustered, he turned to storm off, and refused to look back, even when Han incessantly called his name. He was sorry about it afterwards, but he was also confused.

He despised Han Solo. That was and always had been very clear. So why did he feel this need to make him stay? Why did he miss him? Why was he so afraid to let him go? It wasn't possible that he actually liked the pirate, was it? He didn't get the chance to dwell on it, as Leia had come to see if he was alright. Clearly, he was not.

"What's wrong?"

"It's that stupid Captain Solo, and I hate him, and I'm glad he's leaving, and-"

"Calm down!" instructed the girl, and Luke sucked in a few deep breaths. "Now, what's really troubling you?"

He paused, staring at the ground. "I'm going to try and blow up the Death Star."

After a moment she realized the problem. "Oh…you're having second thoughts."

"No," he shook his head. "But…I am betraying the Empire."

"I thought you hated the Empire?"

"I do! I'm just…." Now he looked her in the eye. "I only….I wish Master Obi Wan was here, to tell me what to do, to help me do it."

"Oh," she soothed, gently brushing his hair out of his eyes. He was trembling at the thought of his master, and she wondered if it had been a good idea to put him in Red Group. Still, there was no going back now. She kissed his cheek and he flushed, stuttering slightly. "Good luck."

He finally managed "Thanks," before she left, and he climbed into the cockpit.

…

Adrenaline took over like a drug. His superior knowledge of Imperial tactics and TIE weaknesses meant that picking off the looming enemy was much easier, and he was able to save a couple of people's necks from the chopping block. It was surprising as well as flattering whenever they saved his own.

His first attempt down the shaft had been cut short when it was agreed he'd descended far too steeply and he'd never pull out in near enough time. It was a real problem with the X-Wings. Lighter to handle than a TIE, they also had less defense, and he found himself making nose dives when all he wanted was a gentle decent. However, he was not a renowned pilot for nothing, and he was soon gaining control of the situation.

That is, until he recognized his father's Advanced TIE Fighter.

…

The Rebel scum were being obliterated easily. It proved to Darth Vader once again that no one could take on the Empire and ever hope to succeed.

Why wasn't it that Luke couldn't realize that?

When he'd discovered his homing device had been dismantled, he'd been furious. Only Luke would have thought to look, and known where to find it. And how was it that Obi Wan had dared have the tenacity to so much as look at his boy, let alone train him to become a reasonably powerful padawan in such short time? Of course, the boy couldn't take his father on yet, but if he practiced dedicatedly, how long would it take? Was he to be threatened by his own flesh and blood? Was this what the Jedi had done to the Skywalker family? Civil war?

If Luke was flying now – and knowing his son, he probably was – and even so much as thought about trying to blow up the Death Star….well, there would be no remorse for Vader to do his worse.

Or would there be?

…

Luke swore, smacking his fist against his helmet, not wanting to hit the instruments of the plane. "Red Leader's down," he croaked, as though Wedge and Biggs didn't already know.

"Yeah…" acknowledged the former.

"What are you going to do now?" asked the later.

Luke tightly shut his eyes. It was him. It had to be him. He'd be the one to do it, or Yavin IV would be crushed as swiftly as innocent Alderaan. Only this time, Leia was on the planet instead of watching.

_I can't let them do it…._

But by the same token, could he fire a shot into that exhaust pipe? It wasn't his skills he doubted, it was his conscience. Over 100,000 men inside that man made monster, and many of them were just as innocent as the ones on Alderaan. Two wrongs didn't make a right, but standing on the sidelines and watching Yavin IV being blown to pieces was the same as murder.

Well, why not? He'd murdered before.

The thought made him want to be sick.

_Please, Master Obi Wan….What am I going to do?_

"Luke?" The sound of Wedge's voice cracking over the com link forced him out of his contemplation, and he nodded, as though someone could see him.

"Let's go."

The race down the shaft was intense, and it didn't take him long to realize that his father was on their tail.

"Luke, I can't hold them much longer."

"Just…Just hang tight for a second, Biggs. I'm so close!" To no one in particular except maybe the X-Wing he added, "Come on, come on!...Okay! Almost in range for target!"

"You'd better make it fast!"

"Right!"

_Trust your senses, Luke._

His concentration and composure were shattered. Breathless, he felt his windpipe tighten and his mind raced. No…Not possible. It was just a dream. After all, he did have that sick feeling again. Not here, please, not now.

_Use the Force._

_M…Master?_

He didn't get a response as there was a sudden cry and a loud explosion behind him. He gasped, feeling a presence in the Force flicker out.

Biggs.

"Luke, god damn it, you had better fire fast!" Wedge swore as the only way to relieve the intense emotion he was suddenly feeling, and Luke replied a chocked affirmative.

But he couldn't go much faster down the shaft and hope to save his own neck, so he just prayed, reaching out for Obi Wan again.

_Master? Are you really there? Please, tell me; what am I to do?_

From Kenobi there was no reply, but the Force suggested, it it's wordless language, that he shut off his targeting computer. After a moment's hesitation, he turned it off.

From the Rebel base, a technician asked "You've turned off your targeting computer. Is something wrong?" Translation: You kamikaze bastard, are you stupid?

"Nothing, I'm fine."

So close….So close….

Wedge, however, had been clipped, and Luke told him to get out while the getting was good.

Just him. Only he could do it.

**To Be Continued….**

_This is it….Ooooo….Are you all as excited as I am? What's gonna happen?_

xInuyashaxangelx: He just might have to, yup

TorontoBatFan: There will be some more Mara. A bit sooner than I had originally anticipated, but I think it'll have to be like that. As for what Vader's up to….I honestly have no idea….Parcheesi?

Insane Pineapple from Naboo: Well, I don't _think _anyone tries to assassinate him. But the characters are tricky, and like to change things on me while I'm not looking…..


	21. Part 1 Chapter 20

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part One**

**Chapter Twenty**

The target was locked. His aim was perfect. One shot was all it took. One shot and the Empire would be safe, and the Rebel scum would be obliterated.

One shot, and his son would be dead.

Vader found himself contemplating this against his will. The fate of only person he'd dared to love for seventeen years rested in his hands. He had a duty to his master to destroy Luke. He had a duty as a father to protect him. Both could not be obeyed. One must bow to the other.

But his little boy! His pride and joy, his hope, his life, his _soul_ was wrapped up in the eighteen year old that he must murder or be murdered himself. What option did he have? Why, why, _why _did Luke have to force his hand and his judgment in such a manner? What forces were allied against him to ensure his life long unhappiness?

_I can't!_

He hesitated that crucial second. If he hadn't, everything would have been entirely different.

…

Luke sucked in a breath, knowing that time was not on his side. The seconds ticked down, the hour glass was growing empty, and he wasn't sure if he'd be physically able to make the shot. Only because he was sure he'd soon be dead.

"Yahoo!"

His eyes nearly popped out of their sockets. Han? He could hear two of the three pilots spin wildly out of control, smashing into the sides of the Death Star. He unconsciously prayed that his father wasn't one of them. But, of course, he couldn't be. His father's talents as a pilot were remarkable, that's where Luke had gotten it from.

"You're all clear kid." Was this possible? "Now let's blow this thing so we can go home!"

Luke closed his eyes, he trusted the Force.

He pushed the button.

He lingered only long enough to watch his shot go in before finally exhaling and pulling out, racing along and back to Yavin IV. It never once occurred to him that he was a hero.

_Remember, the Force will be with you, always._

Luke felt hot tears of joy spring to his eyes. _I'll never forget you. That's more important. I won't forget the Force because of what you taught me. _

No reply. Maybe it was a sort of situation where you could only receive thoughts, not transmit them back. Oh, it didn't matter. Nothing mattered. He was both overjoyed and deeply stunned. He'd saved Yavin IV, but he was still a murderer and a traitor. He was not entirely certain that the welcome back on the base would be warm.

…

Luke was not entirely certain he knew what was happening. Leia had suddenly thrown her arms around his neck, his arms supporting her waist. Laughing, he spun her, planting a chaste kiss on her cheek, grinning from ear to ear.

"You did it, Luke! I knew you could do it, I told them you would, I…" She'd had to stop as she had started to cry too. Han was suddenly upon them, and then what seemed a mass of pilots – a lot more than the ones that had been fighting above Yavin IV – attacked him.

"Look at you!"

"You're a hero, kid!"

"You're a rebel!"

"You're unstoppable!"

"To the stars!"

So lovingly mobbed, he was certain he'd soon collapse. But then, maybe not. His place in the Rebellion so secured, any thoughts that he would be cast out for his former ties to the Empire died. Any idea that Leia would never trust him banished. Any consideration that he'd never hear his master's voice again comforted. Everything was assuaged, and it was hours before he found a moment to himself. Rebel High Command thanked him personally, and General Rieekan had commented that he'd never seen a better job.

He'd never been happier.

…

"Ya nervous, kid?"

"Han, seriously, stop calling me kid."

Han shrugged, still grinning at the boy, decked out in his flight jacket and pants. "Ya still are one."

"I'm nineteen!" Luke hissed, trying to make sure his hair was straight.

"You're eighteen."

"I'm nineteen," he challenged. "My birthday was three days ago."

Solo raised an eyebrow. "Really?"

"Yes, really," said an exasperated young Skywalker.

"Well, happy birthday. I'll have to get you a present."

Luke shook his head, grinning. "Everything I want I have right here."

"Everything?"

He ducked his head momentarily, his throat tightening; it was a threat of the tears that very might well come at the thought of his beloved mentor. "Almost."

In an uncharacteristic display of sympathy, Captain Solo clapped the nineteen year old on the shoulder. "I'm really sorry about your Jedi Master, kid."

"Yeah," he whispered. "I am too…."

"Time heals all wounds."

"No it doesn't."

The smuggler shrugged again. "Yeah, you're right, but that's what they keep telling me, so maybe someday they'll get it right."

Luke allowed a small smile and straightened up again. He glanced at the door as it sounded like someone was trying to open it. "I guess we're going in now."

"You nervous?" the pirate repeated.

Luke now grinned. "Please, after blowing up the Death Star? I couldn't be more calm."

The doors did, in fact, open, and after a moment, he, Han, and the Wookie walked down, heads held high, several thousands of pairs of eyes watching them. But all of Luke's attention was focused on Leia, who was looking extremely radiant. He smiled triumphantly before bowing his neck to accept the medal, his heart full to the bursting. Turning around, he was met with thunderous applause, through which he could not help but to grin. This was it, this was where he belonged. Not as a Sith Lord and Imperial Prince. But with the people who accepted him for who he was. That was really all he'd been looking for all along.

…

Dawn. Dawn, alone – the first time in several hours he'd been alone – and he didn't feel tired. He felt serene. He felt content. He'd come to peace with the fact that he had, in fact, committed murder and unforgivable treason in the act of blowing up the Death Star. The Force flowed over him soothingly, counseling and calming. He sucked in a breath of fresh air, and let what ever tension remained in his mind out. Stretching briefly, he allowed the same for his body before sitting cross legged on the dirt again.

"Master? Can you hear me? Are you still there?"

Master Obi Wan had promised that, even if Luke couldn't see him, he was perpetually at his side. Come Sith Hell or high water, Kenobi was there for the boy, and the boy was there for Kenobi. They were connected to each other. And, he noted, Leia had told him firmly that you did not lose someone to death. His beloved mentor would be in his heart until Luke himself was offered up to death, to that interconnectedness within the Force.

He mused with a smirk on his face that now that he was a part of Rebellion, death might soon come knocking at his door. He didn't worry about it. Death didn't frighten him, never had. Now, were he to lose Leia, or Han, or Wedge….that he feared. He didn't think he'd ever be able to stop being afraid of that very real possibility.

"I'm listening, Master. What will you try and tell me? Where do I go from here?"

The rising sun over the misty horizon held infinite possibilities. Three months ago, the idea that he would have destroyed the Death Star would have been laughed at uproariously. For one, he was Lord Skywalker, and would never do such a thing. For two, no one thought it could be done.

His father hadn't been too far off when he'd said that the Skywalkers were a breed that perpetually did what everyone claimed was impossible. Whether it was always a good thing or not was subject to debate, but Luke knew that it was true.

Where was his father now?

He sucked in another breath, and closed his eyes, allowing the glow of the sun, like a melted gold coin, to shine over his eyelids, silhouetting the veins. A slight smile on his lips, his breathed out again. So calming, so reassuring. With every breath he pulled in the Force. And nothing was impossible so long as he had that never-ending string of life on his side, and he'd been told countless times that he did. The Dark Side was no longer a threat. It seemed to him that he was perpetually buried in Light. And that made him immensely happy. There was no comparison. It was like a soothing friend that would always understand him.

"I will go on. You showed me the way. I will not fail you."

It was a promise. And it, just like the Force, was forever.

**End Part One**

_How cool is this? An hour after posting chapter nineteen, I have twenty up! Sweet! Anyway, thus ends ANH and Part One. Due to my previous month long break, I don't really need another one. I will take a brake from the main story for a short time so I can do some updating with Where You Were Going To. I need to post a song fic, need to finish writing a fic about when Luke's fifteen, and need to write a fic of a conversation between he and Leia at the funeral for the several dozen pilots who did not survive the attack on the Death Star. So, I just want to say thank you to everyone; to those of you who've read it, to those that reviewed, for those that have been with me ever since the prologue five months ago. You are all very special to me, and I am honored that you all have shown such enthusiasm for this fic. It is, by far and large, the most successful thing I've ever undertaken. After three years of writing, I am getting the response I used to only be able to dream about. Whilst that is a compliment to me, it would never have been possible without all of you standing right beside me through it all. I can only hope with confidence that Part Two will be just as much fun to read as well as write, and that all of you will still enjoy it, and maybe even more so. Much loves and kisses – Shadow13_

HermioneSkywalker: I hope this makes you feel better

Myotismon13: A little less Vader-y than I'd hoped for, but I really loved Luke's whole peaceful moment at the end. I think it wrapped up the season better than a whole lot of Vader going "Kill him! Wait, no. Do it! Ah, crud!" Anyway, I really hope you liked it.

xInuyashaxangelx: I just want to thank you for being one of the very special people who has read every chapter of this story way when I first began it. –snugs-


	22. Interlude

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Interlude**

Insomnia was perpetually a part of Luke's nights. In that respect, very little had changed in the year that he'd been a part of the Rebellion. Well, to be fair, he had become the Rogue Squadron commander, and that was a huge feat in and of itself. He'd grown a year older. That wasn't quite so momentous, but it was still something.

Now twenty, Luke shifted uncomfortably, stuffing his head under a pillow, the sheets becoming entwined around his struggling limbs. There was little point to trying to sleep. It never worked. He could try every remedy in the book, but nothing ever helped. He whined angrily, a sound just barely audible since the pillow filtered out most of the sound. Taking it off of his face in order to draw in a decent breath, he gave in, and simply lay very still, giving in to the wave of thoughts that always accompanied this particular type of state of wakefulness.

The first silent contemplation was of Han Solo, whom Luke had recently discovered he did not hate. It hadn't simply been that he'd woken up one morning and said to himself "Gee, Han's a really swell guy." He couldn't say that such a thought every occurred to him all at once at entirely random. It had been a slow going process, so gradual and clandestine as to entirely escape the young Jedi's notice. He had to admit that he'd started liking Solo way back on Tatooine, even though he still had hated him. Life had an odd sense of humor like that.

And, of course, Tatooine brought up one thought and one thought only.

_Master?_

Ever since the destruction of the Death Star, Luke had gotten no direct contact from Obi-Wan. It made him wonder if he'd really heard Kenobi at all. Was it just wishful thinking on his part? Had he imagined it? Had the advice that he'd been given really just come from inside himself?

In a way, it had. If the old man lived merely as a memory inside his young padawan's heart, then, even if it had been the Jedi speaking to Luke at the time, the voice truly did come from inside of him. All the same, he liked to think that his master remained just in reach, within his grasp, and far more real and tangible than just a fading voice – not from fading love. That still burned like a bonfire – in his head and in bittersweet dreams he never remembered come morning.

The amount of painful dreams had not gone down. The Death Star no longer loomed, but he could still see his father, his master, and most desperately, his mother.

Rolling over, he inwardly whispered to himself "Now I'll never know her." Not to say it was possible for him to meet her. That, he'd always known, would never occur. But to know about her was like to know her, and with his master gone, who else was there left that had known the woman that haunted him? He was not exactly on speaking terms with his father, and even if he were, Darth Vader had always lied to him.

_You wouldn't even tell me her name…._

What was his father doing now? No doubt he hated Luke now. Whilst that did strike an unpleasant chord within the boy, he didn't let it bother him, and managed to shrug it off, for the most part. Well, his father had always told him "If you're not with me, then you're my enemy," and as much as Luke wasn't out to wound Vader personally, he was certainly no longer on his side. Luke rolled over again, scowling, thoughts of his father creating dark and menacing emotions. Breathing in and then out again, he forced them down and away, allowing himself to dwell on happy memories of other things to keep the anger and hate out of him.

_Master Obi-Wan would tell me hate is wrong, that if I give in to hate, then my father and the emperor have won. Then I am a pawn of the Dark Side._

Luke would never be a pawn of the Dark Side ever again.

Moving on, his thoughts rested on Leia, another bittersweet emotion. After a year, her feelings toward him had not changed. "Luke, you are very sweet, and I really do care about you more than you could possibly know, but….I am never going to fall in love with you. Please understand. Move on, for your own sake. There's plenty of other pretty girls out there."

"But I'll never find one as pretty as you," he'd whispered forlornly. "Alright, I'll give you some romantic space. But it won't stop me from loving you." And it didn't. He didn't know how to stop the dull pain in his chest that tormented him every time he saw, or heard, or thought about Leia. She was so perfect, it was so unfair….

_"Why do people have to tell lies?"_

_"Usually it's because they want something and they're afraid the truth won't get it for them."_

_"Do you tell lies to me?"_

_"No."_

But how could he believe that? It wasn't that he thought Leia lied to him. It was more that he speculated that you could never be fully certain if anyone was ever telling you the truth. He'd thought for years his father's name was simply Vader. Maybe Vader Skywalker, or some sort of combination to explain Luke's last name. But Obi-Wan had said that his name was Anakin. Anakin Skywalker….Luke rolled the name over on his tongue, deciding that he liked the sound of it. Why couldn't his father have remained Anakin Skywalker? The name certainly sounded better than Darth Vader to the young man's ears.

He considered that everything about him might very well be a falsehood. After all, how did anyone know their date of birth? Their parents told them. But how could you possibly confirm that your parents were telling the truth. Of course, you shouldn't be put into a situation where you couldn't necessarily trust him.

Fate had dealt him a cruel and unfair hand, but the why always escaped him. He begged the Force to tell him what he had done to merit growing up as a Sith, to never meet his mother, to lose his master, to never win Leia's affections? But the Force never answered, which only frustrated him more.

_What is the divine destiny that you have for me? Why am I the way I am? Why did I have to be this way?_

No matter how Luke looked at it, there was no plausible, or at least, acceptable answer.

Luke wondered so many things, so many questions that were never answered. There was no one to answer them. He could beg, plead, and bargain with the Force, but it simply never worked.

Trying to resign himself to sleep, he rolled over again, tightly shutting his eyes.

_What is my purpose? What do you want me to do? What will tomorrow bring?_

They were questions everyone asked, and for everyone, the answer was different. Pain, joy, suffering, healing, pleasure, guilt, death, birth. Luke could feel the complexities of it all swirling all around him, and he wanted to pin point himself, follow the trail to his destiny, and rest easy, knowing what would happen, and that he must accomplish it. But it didn't work that way, and he guessed it was probably for the better. Still, it didn't stop his wishing.

_Who am I? Who will I be? Where do I belong?_

With the Empire? With the Rebellion? With his father? With his friends? He couldn't have said.

_Where am I going to?_

**To Be Continued…**

_I've lost a lot of the details I'd hoped to put in here due to time, so it is a little disappointing. However, I got the main stuff across, and I do like the over all effect. I put up two sideline chapters, and the third I'm too lazy to write, so it might be a while. Whatever. On to Part Two! Love you all!_

xInuyashaxangelx: Glad I could hold you interest for so long. Part Two starts with the next chapter, but I won't get into ESB for a little while. Major plotishness. Oh yeah.

Schnickledooger: I was never an Ani fan either. Not flopping Don't cry.

Slayer rock chick: New fan! Cool!

TorontoBatFan:….You have read The Killer Angels…..I've decided that I love you.

Seriously, how do you know all this cool stuff? It is so amazing! A Star Wars Killer Angels person is like finding a needle in a haystack. Yeah, you are amazing.

As for the X-Wing vs. TIE…. .. It's a good thing I don't claim to be an expert at this stuff, or I would get my ego beaten up so many times….

Cookiemunster: Insert fanfare here.


	23. Part 2 Chapter 1

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter One**

"Commander Skywalker, could you come here for a moment, please?"

Luke, who had been joking around with Wes and Wedge, turned briefly, curious. General Rieekan was waiting for him expectantly, arms folded behind his back. He was tempted to ask "What did I do?" like a culpable child, but merely responded with "Yes, sir," nodded to his companions, and trotted off.

Walking in silence next to the general for a few paces, he began to wonder what was so clandestine as to know one else being able to know about it.

"Rebel High Command needs to have a word with you," he finally said, and Luke felt his spirits sink ever deeper.

Unable to control himself, he had to ask, "General Rieekan, sir, did I do something wrong?"

Rieekan laughed, playfully clapping Skywalker on the shoulder. "No, no, of course not! It's just a very delicate subject we have for you. I think you'll understand in a moment."

…

And he did. As soon as he was seated, they announced "We have a job for you to do," and slid several data pads his way. Managing to scan through most of the information he asked "I'm afraid I don't quite understand. None of this really looks like it needs to be held a complete secret."

The esteemed officials of the Rebel High Command shifted nervously, and Luke felt the pit in his stomach grow more noticeable.

"Luke," Leia smoothed, "we've been noticing that….well, it seems…." She looked helplessly up at Mon Mothma, and Luke's gaze drifted to her as well.

"We have a mole."

Young Skywalker had bolted from his seat, heart breaking. "And you think it's me. After all this time, you still-"

Leia was quickly soothing him, and General Dodonna was shedding some light on the situation. "No, we do not," he denied firmly. "That is why we are trusting you with this information."

"We wouldn't if we didn't know for certain that you weren't the mole," confirmed Rieekan, nodding sternly.

Intrigued, Luke sat back down, and Leia continued. "But we don't want anyone else to think it is you, or have the blame shift to you. So, we're sending you on a trip."

"Very short."

"Very important."

"Okay…" he allowed, reading through the data pads again. "When do I go?"

"Tomorrow."

His shoulders slumped slightly, but of course he didn't protest. "Yes, I understand. Alright. Well," he rose from the chair, as did the respected officials, "thank you very much for your confidence. I won't fail you."

"That we already knew," Leia smiled, and he was off and on his way.

…

Two days later, Luke was knocking on the door to room L26 in what seemed to him to be a rather neglected apartment complex for Naboo. His mission: There was a contact who could provide him with the name of highly secretive manufacturer of large bulk cruisers, and the Rebellion was in desperate need of a few new – or newer, anyway – ones. Moreover, he'd be willing to work with the Alliance. Luke didn't have to pick anything up, just see some people, confirm some orders, and plump up some bank accounts with credits.

Whoever lived in such a poorly maintained apartment could probably stand to have their bank account plumped up a bit, he mused sadly, shaking his head. He vaguely wondered for a moment if had he someday been emperor if he would have provided equal housing. But then, he doubted he would have even really cared.

The door – the paint of which was peeling off – cracked open, and the small head of a Sullustian child peeked through. Luke managed a small smile and a "Hello, there," before the door was thrown wide open, and the small boy surprised young Skywalker by gustily shouting "Mom! There's some guy at the door!"

He needn't have yelled so loud. The small apartment's living room and kitchen were attached, and as the mother was busily cooking breakfast, could see quite well that there was someone at the door, and could easily hear her son.

"Mind your manners, Cory!" she cried in a slightly squeaky voice as she went back to the cooking food. "Invite the poor boy in, don't just leave him standing in the hall!"

"Cory," wrinkled when his nose when his name was said, and admitted to Luke in a hushed whisper "I _hate _my name." Luke nodded understandingly. However, Cory did step out of the door way, the most official welcome Luke figured he'd be getting, and he stepped into the tidy apartment, shutting the door behind him.

One child, Luke noted, was sitting on a threadbare couch, entranced by a holovid screen, and Cory quickly joined her. Two more had been playing with a litter of strange looking puppies on the rug, but they stopped to stare at Luke. He smiled and nodded politely, and one – a young girl – blushed, inciting her younger brother to relentlessly poke her in the ribs. She angrily waved him away, and tried to absorb herself in the care of the puppies.

"Have a seat, deah," the mother said, smiling, her "r," coming out as "h." He politely pulled out a slightly rickety chair from the worn and scratched wooden table. He'd originally thought that the Rebellion was paying an exorbitant sum for a name, but decided that there were far worse things to spend their money on. "You must be the boy who's here to see Henry," she said. "Have you had breakfast?"

"Um, no, I-"

"Oh, well, here!" She barked an order to her children, who now scampered to the table, and she set plates out before all, including Luke.

"Uh, that's alright, I'm really not that hungr-"

"Nonsense!" she dismissed, bustling back into her kitchen. "Why, you're thin as a post. What do they feed you at that silly little operation?"

He vaguely wondered if she quite understood what went on at that little operation. Murder, for one thing, he violently thought. Leia and the Rebel High Command had been worrying themselves to pieces, as Luke seemed to be getting progressively mentally worse. His part in the destruction of the Death Star had originally violently haunted him, but did ebb off. It had suddenly come back with vengeance, and with it Luke's lack of sleep – which he already had, it merely worsened – and his terrible habit of not eating. He suspected that that had been another deciding factor on shipping him off world for a while; he guessed he sort of did need a break.

He was about to eat when something was suddenly stuck into his lap. Looking down, he noted that it was the nose of a dog – probably the mother of the puppies on the rug – and she, too, was of an odd sort of breed. Her two tails wagged merrily, her four eyes blinking. Smiling, he patted the smooth head, and managed to nibble on the bacon served.

"Um, Misses-" he paused, realizing he merely knew the location, not the name, of the person who would help him find the man in charge of the bulk cruisers.

"Mrs. Destalk, sweetheart," she smiled. "And what's your name?"

He'd convinced the Rebel High Command that his first name didn't need changing, as there had to be millions of other people named Luke, and he never could remember pseudonyms. His last name, however, _had_ to go. "Luke Edinburgh," he supplied, hoping he hadn't screwed up the pronunciation. On to business: "Mrs. Destalk, where is your husband?"

"Henry? He's at his night job at this electronics company, Risen Corp. But he should get off soon."

And not a quarter of a standard hour later, in walked an exhausted and haggard Mr. Destalk. "Henry, deah," his wife called while the tired man's four children congregated excitedly to see him, "Luke's here to see you."

"Who?" he asked, hugging each child before rubbing at his tired eyes. "Oh, the boy from the Alli-"

Luke quickly cut him off, rising to meet him. The dog, which had been happily laying on Luke's feet, causing his left foot to go numb, whimpered slightly. Mr. Destalk quickly caught on that he probably shouldn't implicate himself anymore than necessary. "If you still have the contact's name sir, we'll make the transfer and I'll be on my way."

"Yes, of course," he said, taking the data pad that Luke offered him in order to write it out. Luke would then be charged with memorizing it and erasing it. After finishing, he nervously handed it back and asked "When will I get the money?"

He suspected that that was weighing heavily on his mind constantly. The family could clearly use the cash. "As soon as I meet with…" he looked down at the name, did not speak it, and looked back up, "I'll have the credits transferred in small amounts, so as not to be noticed."

"Yes," the exhausted man nodded, blinking his eyes once and then twice. "I'm sorry to have kept you waiting."

"Not at all." He shook hands with the poor man and bowed respectfully to Mrs. Destalk before preparing to go. He did, however, wink at the girl who had been watching him all through breakfast before leaving, and he smiled, noting that she'd blushed again.

…

Luke had been sitting at booth for about an hour, the smoke of the greasy bar starting to bother his eyes. He'd refrained from drinking much of anything unless he was sure it was reasonably nonalcoholic, and tried to pretend to be absorbed in his data pad.

In truth, he was depressed again. He'd arranged to meet the contact – a one Jarken Risen – at the seedy establishment earlier that day, and had spent the rest of the afternoon dwelling on the Destalk family.

Essentially, it all boiled down to the fact that despite their obviously tight resources, Luke would have traded childhoods with one of the four any day of the week. Poor the family was, but clearly close knit, and reasonably happy, which was more Luke could say about the relationship between his father and himself. As if that line of thought wasn't depressing enough, thinking of his father only made things a whole lot worse, so that he was practically a wreck by the time that Jarken Risen arrived.

**To Be Continued…**

HermioneSkywalker: Insert fanfare here

xInuyashaxangelx: Here it is!

jedi71: Chapter 10's a good chapter. Hope you enjoy the rest of it too.

Stefanie2: I did manage to look at a few little bits of Timothy Zahn stuff. Hopefully I'll be able to check something out of the library….

TorontoBatFan: Yes, it's a very absorbing book. It is very cool to have found someone else who likes it.

Jedi-Goddess/Nascar girl: Well, the "Luke, I am your father," thing will obviously have to work out a bit differently.

Vader: Luke, I am your father.

Luke: Well, big freaking duh.

Damaris: I've started the next chapter, but I have a lot of Drivers Ed homework, so it might take a bit….


	24. Part 2 Chapter 2

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Two**

"How are the stocks, friend?" the burly human asked, the agreed upon code. He slid onto the bench across from where Luke sat in his chair, smiling affably.

Luke tried to perk himself up a bit and burry himself in working. Managing a very small smile, he replied, "The same as ever," before sliding the data pad across to Risen. "You don't happen to be the Risen of Risen Corp, do you?" he whispered, resting his forearms on the table.

Risen shook his head. "My cousin. But that is how I met Henry." Luke left him in silence to finish reading the data pad, before Risen looked up again. "Reasonable order. When do you want it?"

"When can you have it?"

Risen grinned. "Is there any way I can contact some of the higher ups? It'll make delivery much smoother."

Luke gave him some names and various ways of getting in contact. They talked business for about an hour before Risen rose, shaking Luke's hand.

"I'll deliver the first one in three months, then."

"Excellent. Thank you again."

"The pleasure's all mine."

He walked out the door, and, not knowing what else to do, Luke stayed to wallow in self pity.

…

He heard her before he saw her. The alcohol, while not making him drunk, did dull his senses and judgment considerably, so that he hardly noticed, solemn and somber as he was, anything or anybody.

He could feel the muzzle of the blaster press into the back of his skull, and the adrenaline began pumping in his veins.

"Give me one good reason I shouldn't blow your brains out, you bastard."

Disregarding the severity of the situation, he turned full around, remaining annoyingly neutral. "Long time no see, Mara."

The Emperor's Hand was standing before him, as armed and dangerous as ever. Only this time, her rage happened to be directed at him. Not an unknown thing, but generally an unpleasant one. At the moment, slightly inebriated and very apathetic, he didn't even flinch.

Her emerald eyes flashing her strong displeasure, she spat "Don't you push your niceties with me!"

"Here, take a seat," he offered, scooting over and patting the spot next to him. Mara deliberately refused, and took a seat at the bench opposite his chair. A waitress walked by, and he signaled her. She paused, looking curiously from one face to the other. "Can I get one of…" he looked at his glass, and merely held it up, "whatever the heck these things are for the lady?"

Astonished, Mara was soon seething. "How dare you just…you…you self-righteous-"

She would have continued to shower him with abuses had the waitress not scurried off crying to the bartender "Special on the rocks, Borden, and you'd better make it a double! Looks like we're having boyfriend troubles!"

"He's not my boyfriend!" she shouted after the woman, which only succeeded in drawing several pairs of eyes in their direction.

Grinning, Luke gave the knife a little twist. "Now, come on, honey…."

The baleful look she was sending him spoke untold volumes of pain and retribution.

Finally, she leaned foreword and whispered "Why are you doing this?" The waitress dropped the two glasses in front of the "love birds," Luke taking an appreciative swig from his while Mara pushed hers away in disgusted distrust.

"Drinking? I happen to like alcohol."

"That's not what I meant, and you know it!"

He shrugged. "It seems to me I don't know much of anything anymore."

"Who are you? I don't understand, I don't know you."

Suddenly sober, he stared at her intently. "That's right. You don't."

Clearly wounded, she rose, one hand on the blaster to emphasize her point. "Get up, we're getting out of here."

"But I haven't paid yet!"

She angrily slammed a few credits onto the table, which Luke added to. "Ah…I've been here for a while," he explained.

She rolled her eyes. "That doesn't surprise me." She motioned him on, walking behind him so that she could watch him successfully. Once out of the establishment, she dragged him into a side alley, shoving him angrily against the wall. He made no move to protest, and merely turned around to face her again, his lack of action only infuriating her all the more.

"You spineless coward, fight back, damn you!"

Luke crossed his arms, said nothing.

"What's happened to you?" she finally pleaded, tears threatening to spring to her eyes. "You're not who I remembered."

He shook his head. "I never will be."

"I've known you for as long as I can remember," she stressed weightily. "I demand – no, I deserve a few answers; Why did you join the Rebellion? What happened on Tatooine?"

"On Tatooine?" he responded, breaching a very tender subject. They momentarily circled each other like enemies, which, essentially, they were. He paused, closing his eyes briefly. "Everything happened on Tatooine. _Obi-Wan _happened on Tatooine."

"So…" she sneered. "That's it. How could you, Luke? Honestly? You promised, you _swore _that when you met Kenobi, you'd kill him."

"Yes," he snorted, resting a hand against the wall. "I was very foolish then."

"You're foolish _now_, and I can't even understand why."

"You don't get it!" Luke suddenly and savagely cried. "You _can't _get it. Obi-Wan loved me, Mara, he _loved _me. And that's something the emperor will never do. Never." She looked about ready to protest, so he merely cut her off. "I would have followed him to the ends of the galaxy. I would have _died _for him. But I can't." His full weight fell against the wall, and he began to cry, the sobs shaking his shoulders. He hadn't allowed himself to cry over anything in a year. Not over Leia, or Biggs, or anyone. Only Obi-Wan merited tears. "He died for me instead. Well, it's not fair! I should be the one dead, I should….I…." The rest of the words were incoherent, and Mara remained rooted to the spot, astounded. She'd never recalled ever having seen Luke cry before, and she felt moved to compassion. That was an emotion she swiftly tried to crush, as she reminded herself that she was supposed to hate Luke. No, not supposed to. She _did_. Yes…she…

Why was his presence so disarming?

Very timidly, she reached a hand out and touched his shoulder. He didn't move. "And I'll never get him back. I'll…never have that kind of love again. Ever." He banished the rest of his tears and turned back toward the girl. "Now, tell me: How can you possibly understand all that I have gone through in the last year?"

She said nothing, merely watched him, blaster still raised cautiously.

"So, what are you going to do, Mara? What sort of game are we playing?"

"Coruscant," she now firmly replied, her hand tightening around her weapon. "I'm taking you there, or I'm shooting you here. It's your choice."

"Oooh," he replied sarcastically, sneering. "I get options? How gracious of you! However," here he became serious again, "I'm not going back to Coruscant. Ever."

Jade faltered slightly. "Then you have sentenced yourself to death."

"Go ahead, I'll make it easy on you." He walked close enough for the barrel to point straight into his stomach, their faces very close now. "Can't miss." Nothing. "You might be doing me a favor, you know. Are you going to do it?" The pace of her breathing had quickened. Was it the act of killing the heir to the dark throne, or was it merely how close he was. So easy to reach out to…She squashed that line of thought.

"Or can't you do it?"

Her brow furrowed, her grip tightening, composure back and in control.

"March, Skywalker."

…

Was it hours she had him walk, or moments? Her reasons for being on Naboo was to assassinate an admiral who was getting in the way, so she was sworn to the utmost secrecy. That meant no docking in hanger beds; she had to pick a desolate spot and park her small ship there.

The moon large and full in the sky, Luke yawned slightly when they finally arrived, miles away from city. He speculated that morning would come in a few hours. But for now, it was deepest, darkest night.

She marched him up the ramp, blaster still poised. "Mind if I sit down?" he asked her, and she merely glared. He slid into her pilots seat nonchalantly, acting as if it were all some marvelous game. "So, what's the plan? Waiting until morning?"

She worked around him, trying to start up the ship. "We leave now," she denied sternly, flipping switches. Mockingly, she added, "I know that the emperor is just dying to see you."

He shivered, the very real possibilities for limitless pain making themselves all too apparent. "I never really realized you wanted me dead that much."

She paused, suddenly eerily silent. "He won't kill you. You're a Lord of the Sith-"

"No," he snarled, now bolting from the chair. "No I am not."

"You can't deny what is in your blood."

"I will never be a Sith again," he swore vehemently. "So the emperor will have to kill me. If you take me to Coruscant, _I will die_," he stressed very carefully. "There is no going around it."

"You're heir to the empire," she argued. "Everyone knows it. You're-"

"Mara!" he cried, "I blew up the god damn Death Star! And he's murdered men for less. Use your head, girl! _Think! _If you take me to Coruscant, my life will not be worth the paper it's printed on!"

"Even if that is true," she seethed, "I have to do my duty. You had to do yours at one point, remember? You will again, he won't kill you."

"You have no idea," he whispered, holding his head in his hands.

**To Be Continued…**

_The long awaited and asked for Mara Jade returns. For two chapters. Yah…But then she'll be back again…For the second to last chapter…um…._

xInuyashaxangelx: Thanks I'm really looking foreword to writing the next one.


	25. Part 2 Chapter 3

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Three**

_I feel your fingers_

_Cold on my shoulder_

_Your chilling touch_

_As it runs down my spine…_

"You're making it very difficult to start the ship," she slowly seethed, as Luke had perched himself in her chair again.

Having brushed off his moment of terror, the young Skywalker shrugged. "That's kind of the idea."

"Will you please move?"

Getting up, he mockingly bowed her to the seat, and she went back to the controls.

She stopped very abruptly when she could suddenly feel him brushing away locks of her red gold hair from her shoulder, only to seductively plant a kiss at the joint of her neck and collar bone.

"If it's possible, you're prettier than I remember."

She bolted from the chair so fast as to make her head spin. "Don't you _dare _touch me."

He shrugged again. "You certainly didn't used to mind."

"Where do you get off? You are the most self-centered, conceited bastard ever born! And I hate you!"

_Watching your eyes_

_As they invade my soul_

_Forbidden pleasures_

_I'm afraid to make mine…_

_At the touch of your hand_

_At the sound of your voice_

_At the moment your eyes meet mine_

_I am out of my mind_

_I am out of control_

_Full of feelings I can't define_

"Besides," she finally managed in a cutting voice, "I thought you were in love with _Princess Organa_?"

Luke fumbled badly. "With Leia? Well, yes, I mean …she doesn't feel the same way."

So that was it. Shunned by his first choice, he was seducing the second. It enraged her and amused her all at the same time. She wanted to laugh in his face and say "So now you know what it feels like to be rejected. I hope it _hurts_!" It clearly hurt anyway, and she suddenly found herself reluctant to wish more pain on him.

_It's a sin with a name_

_Like a hand in flame_

_And our senses proclaim_

_It's a dangerous game!_

Still remaining silent, she felt monumentally distracted.

Damn him! Damn him straight to Sith Hell!

"Go, sit down…Over there, on that box," she finally ordered.

"I really did mean it, though. You're terribly pretty."

_A darker dream_

_That has no ending_

_That's so unreal_

_You believe that it's true_

She glanced at him briefly. "Look," she tried to reason. "Don't you think that this is a little bit inappropriate? We're hardly hormone driven teenagers anymore. Handle this responsibly."

He leaned back against the wall. "Well, you know what they say; friends don't sleep together, but enemies do."

"That's ridiculous," she spat. "That has got to be one of the stupidest things I ever heard."

"But you think it is true."

She glared coldly at him. "How would you know how I think? Since when have you been around long enough to know anything about me?"

_A dance of death_

_Out of a mystery tale_

_The frightened princess_

_Doesn't know what to do!_

He shrugged again. "It seems I'll be around for a while if we ever do take off. Provided I live, of course."

The thought did strike her that Luke could very well be right. Was she unknowingly leading him straight to his doom? Did it matter who did it, or under what circumstances?

Just so long as he died, it didn't matter. Because she wanted him to die. Right…

Luke raised an eyebrow in her direction. "Why the pale face, my dear?"

She shook her head, rubbing forlornly at her arms. "I'm feeling cold."

He smirked, walking calmly closer. "That's fixable." He gently wrapped his arms around her, pulling her against him. Her muscles stiffened. Why didn't she have the strength to fight back? The warmth of his touch was so soothing that she began to relax, leaning against him.

That had to stop right now.

_Will the ghost go away?_

_Will she will them to stay?_

_Either way there's no way to win_

She was able to break free for a moment, managing, "We aren't the same people we were when we tried this before."

He merely calmly pulled her right back in. "No, we're not."

"Please," she tried to beg. "Don't."

"Say stop, and I'll stop."

She couldn't say stop.

_All I know is I'm lost_

_And I'm counting the cost_

_My emotions are in a spin_

She finally pushed him away, turning back. She tried to speak, but merely shook her head.

Finding her composure, she slid the blaster out of it's holster, pointing back to the pilots chair.

"Sit down. Don't touch the controls, I'll get us ready for take off in a minute. And don't even think you can make me change my mind."

"I'm not trying to make you change your mind. Now, will you please put that revolting thing away?"

Her experience with the Force was not so great as his, but she was fairly competent in knowing if someone was lying to her or not. And from her former lover she sensed absolutely no ulterior motives. Could it be that the only thing he was really interested in was her?

_I don't know who's to blame_

_It's a crime and a shame_

_But it's true all the same_

_It's a dangerous game!_

Before she could do or say anything, he'd stood up. For every step he took, she retreated another, until her back was literally to the wall. Prying the blaster from her hands, he tossed it away, pausing to kiss her finger tips.

For as resolved as she'd been in making sure she was never romantically entangled with him again, she was quite the willing participant in their passionate kisses. What as the use in fighting what she'd always known for three years? He tried to say something at one point, but she merely silenced him with more kisses.

_No one speaks_

_Not one word_

_But what words _

_Are in our eyes_

_Silence speaks_

_Loud and clear_

_All the words_

_We don't want to hear!_

If it was indeed love, who was she to fight it? Men and women had been falling in love for uncountable millennia, and it would hardly be fitting for her to break the chain now.

"I'm yours," she finally whispered. "But you'd better not break my heart again."

_At the touch of your hand_

_At the sound of your voice_

_At the moment your eyes meet mine_

_I am losing my mind_

_I am losing control_

_Fighting feelings I can't define_

_It's a sin with a name_

_No remorse and no shame_

_Fire furry and flame!_

_Cause the devil's to blame_

_And the angel's proclaim_

_It's a dangerous game…._

**To Be Continued…**

_I generally don't like putting song fics in the main body of the story, but I decided against doing this as a side line, so this was my only option, really. The song is called Dangerous Game," and is from the Frank Wildhorn musical "Jekyll and Hyde," because I am a Wildhorn nerd. Yes. _

xInuyashaxangelx: Suffice to say that Luke doesn't think with his brain so much as another organ….

Stefanie2: Yeah, drunken intoxication's kinda weird too.

jedi71: Mara is cool. I suck at writing her, but she's cool.

MatrixSailorStarKnightZ: Aw, thanks

Stephanie C: Forget a knife, try a meat cleaver.

Jedi+Goddess: I actually did know they got married, but it took me a while to realize they had kids…um…

Really? What's it about? Sounds very interesting.

Insane Pineapple from Naboo: People will remain ignorant to that which they do not wish to acknowledge. It is sad, but true. That's why we have racism and censorship and all those icky things.

Well, he does get out of the situation, but not without nearly getting himself killed….

Doreen: And more looks foreword to you.


	26. Part 2 Chapter 4

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Four**

It was definitely not the most unpleasant sight he'd ever woken up to. All the same, it was a little bit confusing. He felt both calm and nervous.

_So what happens now?_

He couldn't say for sure.

Mara stirred in her sleep, and rolled over, a lock of her wavy red gold hair falling across her bare shoulder. Quite tenderly, Luke brushed it away, kissing the exposed flesh. Was she still taking him to Coruscant when she woke up? Supposing that by the grace of gods he did live, could it possibly be worth it? Being Imperial Prince definitely had it's perks. He hadn't had a decent power trip in a year, and he'd been practically raised on them. He'd have a lover again, not merely a girl that he pinned after and was continually rejected by. Yes, it was entirely possible that he could have everything he ever wanted again, and all he had to do was turn himself over, and….

_I've got to get out of here._

The blood had drained from his features when he realized where that particularly dangerous line of thought was headed: the Dark Side. And he'd be damned if he was ever going back there again.

He slid out of the bunk as quietly as he could, but in his panic, he couldn't help but wake Mara.

"What are you doing?" she asked him warily as he quickly slid back into his scattered clothes.

"I can't stay here any longer," he pleaded.

"What are you talking about?" Her voice was dark and demanding, and it left no room for questions.

Luke pulled his shirt on, but paused, leaving it unbuttoned. "These thoughts, these emotions….I get and….they're wrong, Mara, I just can't! I look at you, and I am so tempted to go back, and I….I look at you and…." There weren't any real words to describe what happened. "I'm not going back. I've got to go."

It was amazing how quickly she could bolt from the bed, wrap the sheet around her slim figure, and manage to find her discarded blaster. "I told you," she growled. "You weren't going to change my mind. You are going to Coruscant."

He faltered slightly, realizing what a precarious situation he'd put himself it.

_You stupid, lustful, egotistical jerk! Skywalker, when will you learn your lesson? _he berated himself.

"Mara," he said cautiously. "Please, you don't understand…."

"No, I don't think you understand!" Her eyes were practically pleading with him to think rationally. "You're Darth Vader's son, Luke. That is something you can never escape, for as long as you live! How long do you think that your rebel friends are really going to trust you when they know exactly who you are and exactly what you've done?"

He didn't really believe it, did he? No, they were his friends, they knew that he wasn't Imperial anymore. Didn't they? Those cursed seeds of doubt had been planted.

Very slowly he snarled "I am not my father."

"No, but you're his son, isn't that close enough?"

He braced his arm against the wall, trying to remain calm and clear headed. "No, it's not true…they know me, I'm not…"

"You will be the emperor one day, it is in your blood. You've told me so yourself since you were thirteen. That is a destiny you will never escape."

"No!" Damn it, where was his lightsaber? He'd left it on his own transport, of course. Stupid, stupid, stupid… "No, I am not, I won't be, I…." When words fail, the best bet is to simply walk away.

Unless you're walking away from an armed individual.

The blaster fired and Luke felt a white hot searing pain trace up his left arm. He gasped quite audibly, his mouth moving like a fish until he found his words again. And what words they were. "Sith, fuck, shit, hell, damn, damn, damn!" He spun around so as to fall back onto the wall on his good arm.

Gasping for his breath, he stared Mara down with his own icy blue eyes, but her green eyes were flashing fire; she was not back down.

"Coruscant," she snarled. "Or next time I aim for your black little heart, you bastard."

After a few seconds to focus on the Force and deaden the pain in his arm slightly, he tried to rationalize. "Mara…now, just listen to me, Mara, just for a second….It doesn't have to be like this." Her features softened in visible confusion. "You don't have to be the Emperor's Hand."

She faltered for an instant. "What are you saying? Of course I have to be."

"No…" He sucked in a breath to keep from swearing again, giving himself time to focus. "You….you can have a choice." He suddenly held out his good hand to her, and she found herself staring at it as though it were a poisonous snake. "Come with me, Mara. You can join the Rebellion, it's alright. You have a choice. How much of our lives are destiny and how much is choice, have you ever wondered? Well, I'm not letting destiny dictate my every breath. You don't have to either. Come on, Mara, _think _about it, please."

She seemed to hyperventilate for a brief instant before raising her blaster and backing up. "Never. Never, never, never."

He closed his eyes briefly, before opening them with fresh determination. "I'm sorry to hear that." He closed his eyes again for a moment, and suddenly another one of the large boxes, much like the ones Luke had sat on last night, came hurtling through the air with a Force induced push, cracking Mara neatly to her head. Knocked completely unconscious, Luke just barely caught her from smacking her skull against the floor and doing more serious damage.

His fingers gingerly touched the point of impact, imparting some of the healing flow of the Force he'd been using on his arm to her skull. Awkwardly, using his left arm as little as possible, he managed to slide her back into her bunk, and gave her forehead a quick kiss.

"I meant what I said about you being pretty. You're gorgeous." Rising, he winced as the pain flashed up his arm. He gave Mara one last glance as he awkwardly finished dressing. "Guess it just never could work out between us, could it? Ah, well, it's probably for the best."

Making a quick temporary bandage for his terribly painful arm, he bolted out of the ship and back to his own transport as fast as he could.

…

The mole had been found. Luke had returned to base to find Wedge extremely bitter about it, as it had ended up being what Wes reported to be an extremely attractive young woman.

"Wedge," he explained with a snicker, "had been making passes at her for a week." He clapped Luke on the shoulder, only to quickly draw his hand away when his companion yelped like a puppy. Whimpering, Luke gingerly placed a hand over his wounded shoulder. "Sheesh, Luke, what happened to your arm? I thought all you were supposed to be doing was transferring credits, not fighting Imperials." Wes chuckled again, gently patting Luke's unharmed shoulder. "Isn't it funny though? Who would have believed that an Imperial spy would end up being a total babe?"

Luke had to laugh slightly awkwardly at that. Wes figured it was because his arm was giving him trouble. In actuality, he was thinking of the comely Imperial that had caused him the injury.

_I am so dead if she ever catches me._

…

"You haven't talked to me once since you've gotten back. You haven't even said hi. Now, what's going on, Luke? What's wrong?"

Leia had cornered him, as worried and protecting as she always was. Luke hadn't really talked to anyone at all, and, according to Han, hadn't said so much as a word about the mission, when he was usually bursting with an inflated ego.

"Nothing's wrong," Luke lied, staring at the floor. "I don't want to talk about it."

_Stupid, you never add that when you say there's nothing wrong!_

Leia forced his head to look her in the eyes, and she was amazed at the pain she found there. True, Luke often came to her filled with pain when he was upset, but he'd been getting so much better. He'd been so happy.

"Luke," she begged, placing a hand against his cheek. "What happened?"

He faltered and winced slightly. Finally, he blurted out "Am I doomed to be exactly like my father?"

She paused, surprised. "What?"

"Am I…Am I destined to become the emperor? Am I really just fooling myself by thinking that I have some control over my own life?" He swallowed hard, one thought instantaneously coming to mind, and he didn't have time to stop it. "Force, why, why, _why _can't Master Obi-Wan be here? He'd tell me what to do, he'd help me see the truth….It's just so unfair!" He sniffled slightly, but did not cry.

She pushed him into a chair, gently rubbing his hand and whispering hush. "Luke, everyone has a say in their own life. You _chose _to leave the Empire."

"But how can I know that it isn't destiny? That fate isn't playing some cruel trick?"

"You can't know. No one can know. We just try and do our best and see what happens."

"But what if my choices aren't the right ones? What if, even now, I'm leading myself right back to the Empire? To my father, and the Sith?" He bolted from the chair suddenly, pacing like a tiger on a chain. "How can you trust me, Leia? How do you know that I'm not just going to turn around and stab you in the back someday? Because I'm terrified that I might." He collapsed back into the chair, clutching her hands in a pleading manner. "I don't ever want to lose you, betray you. What if the only way I can protect you is to stay as far away from you as possible."

"Don't say that," she ordered. "That's not even funny to joke about."

"I'm not joking!"

"You are not your father."

"No, but I'm his son, isn't that close enough?"

He was serious, she realized, as well as desperate. She hadn't seen him this unhinged in a year. What had happened? He obviously wasn't going to tell her. She gently stroked his cheek, calming his quick and nervous breathing.

"No…no it is not. Until you give in, go back, and be exactly what Vader wants you to be, you will never become your father….And I don't think you ever will go back, Luke. And I will trust you until the day that I die."

He embraced her, clinging to her as if she was the only one to save his soul. But they both knew that that responsibility had belonged to one person and one person only, and that person was gone. It was up to Luke to save his own soul.

**To Be Continued…**

_Well, that little sideline's over, except for the major, huge plot twist in the next chapter. After that it's on to ESB (my personal fav)._

Schnickledooger: patpat There, there. I kinda figured it was you, because I thought to myself "Hm, they review in the same style as Schnickledooger. How odd." And then it was you. What do ya know?

Insane Pineapple from Naboo: Ah, there's more likely to be a whole bunch of goopy fluffy stuff with Luke hitting on Leia rather than Luke hitting on Mara. Though Mara does get her sappy moment in the sun in the next chapter. Then you don't see her again till the end. Unless the characters change their minds on me, which they frequently do.

As for Luke and trouble, it's sort of like, in my mind, something like this: "Oh, something with large teeth and sharp claws! Let's go poke it!"

Nathalia Potter: Mostly it gave me a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach, but otherwise, it wasn't so bad….

PrincessSkywalkerOrgana: doing so.

KnightAragorn: Aw, thanks. I don't do so great…..

Cookiemunster: o.o…..XD! Oh my God, that has to be one of the funniest things I've ever seen….ah…hold on, I've got to wipe the tears of laughter from my eyes….

Moving on.

-blush- Ah, that's very sweet of you. Unfortunately, were I to lock anyone in my extremely messy, slightly smelly shed, Timothy Zahn would not be at the top of the list. That spot belongs to Terrence Mann. The joke among my friends is that if something ever happens to his wife, we know exactly who to blame….um…I'm not psycho, really.

Speaking of which, I should probably go feed John Williams now. Toodles!

Daae: It's not so much moving on so much as it is rebound dating. Luke does care about Mara in a very "Well, you're pretty, and you're not like anyone else I know," kind of way, but he still loves Leia. That's something he's never going to get over. And it's going to take a massive plot twist at the end of this little fic for Luke to realize that a part of him always did and always will love Mara. Likewise, no matter the plot twist, a part of him will also always love Leia. Who he ends up giving his heart to completely, however, I'm saving for the end ;).

xInuyashaxangelx: Blood and violence, it seems.

Stephanie C: They are rather cute together.

Hewgleymom: Thanks! I hope this is to your taste.


	27. Part 2 Chapter 5

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Five**

It wasn't possible. It _couldn't _be possible. Other people, yes. Whores and sluts and courtesans who slept with any man they saw, sure, but she'd given herself to one man and one man only a bare handful of times. She hadn't even so much as _looked _at another man since him. There was nothing for it.

She was not pregnant.

Mara Jade was very close to hyperventilating. It hadn't struck her to worry about insemination after her all too brief encounter with Skywalker. True, she'd stopped taking birth control after they'd broken up. There wasn't really any need to continue as she'd been busy, and there was absolutely no man that she could look at and desire, not after Luke. Even thought that bastard moved right on to _Princess Organa_.

"Soul mate's don't exist," he'd told her once. "Not if you're a Sith." She'd stopped believing him after she'd seen him again.

She just could not be pregnant.

She was left to worry herself sick over what all could happen to herself, to her unborn child, to the child's father. Were Luke still a Sith Lord she could probably get away with it. A new heir, the next Imperial Prince. It was still a possibility, but not a very likely one. Now Luke was a Jedi, not a Sith, and that made him the enemy. And she had slept with the enemy. That was not good. That was decidedly frowned upon. Would she be punished for her promiscuous behavior? She very well might.

Unless she aborted it.

No one had to know. Not the emperor, not Vader, who was coincidentally going to be a grandfather – that thought made her shudder. Not even Luke had to know….

But he had a right to know.

No he did not! That stupid, selfish bastard had abandoned all friend and familial relations to join the Rebels, only to turn around and use her. And she was not going to be used like that! Not by anyone! And especially not Luke Skywalker….

Who was the father of her baby.

All she had to do was abort the baby, and it would be as if it had never happened…..

_I can't!_

She couldn't keep it. Attachment was forbidden. Pregnancy was not exactly a condition easily kept surreptitious. So, really, there was only one choice; the little Jade-Skywalker had to go.

But she couldn't bring herself to do it.

What to do, what to do, what to do? What was going to happen now?

What if she….what if she stayed until just before her pregnancy began to become noticeable, and begged her master for leave to study and train on some distant spot. Assuming she could shield her thoughts and that Palpatine suspected nothing, pregnancy was still a lot of work, and she wasn't sure she knew what to do about it.

Biting her bottom lip, she embraced herself to give herself a little courage. "When the time comes….I'll think of something…."

She didn't know what. She just knew that this had to be a secret from anyone. Even from Luke. Until he came back home to be what destiny had always dictated; Emperor. Was her place of power secure merely because she'd slept with the renegade Imperial Prince? Maybe not. But her child was still of the exact same Skywalker blood as Luke, and even Vader. It might very well be that this child would be an Imperial Prince or Princess.

Or maybe nothing at all, if she had to keep the secret her entire life. Maybe.

_I'll have to wait and see._

…

_Hoth is cold, Hoth is cold, so cold, I'm cold, it's cold. Cold, Force, cold, cold, cold…._

Luke's comlink screamed at him "_Luke!_" for what he did not realize was multiple times. Angrily snaring it, he flicked it on and shouted back, equally vexed, "_What!_"

He could hear Han's grumbling voice on the other end of the line. "Sheesh, I've been trying to reach you for five minutes, ya moron!"

Luke didn't mind the insult. It was surprising that they were at a level where they felt that comfortable with each other. It was a level Luke never would have thought he'd reach.

"Sorry," he replied, rubbing at his well padded arms. "I think my brain froze."

_Cold, cold, cold, cold….._

"What brain?"

"Har, har," he bit back sarcastically.

He vaguely remembered having wished while on Tatooine for some place that was the exact polar opposite. Well, here he was, on Hoth, which was about as unlike Tatooine as it got. Would he rather be back on that dust ball, tenth rate outer rim system? Nah. The memories or dreams or whatever they were didn't attack him here like they did on Tatooine. Maybe the memories were frozen somewhere in the perpetual ice.

"Anyway," continued Solo, "I've finished my run and I don't detect any life readings. 'Course, there isn't enough life on this ice cube to fill a space cruiser. The sensor's are placed, I'm going back."

Something large struck the ground about fifty meters from Luke, and he squinted at the point of impact, curiosity piqued.

"Ya still there?"

"Still here," Luke absently responded.

Captain Solo waited for a moment for Luke to say something else. When he didn't, the pirate merely shrugged, and spoke instead. "So are you coming?"

"In a bit…." Luke replied, still pondering whatever it was that had hit the ground. "There's a meteor that hit near here, I'm going to take a look. I'll see you shortly." He clicked off the com link before Han could respond, and was suddenly hard pressed to keep his Tauntaun under control. They were smelly and unreliable, and Luke really couldn't wait until they got the speeders adapted to the cold.

"Easy girl," he soothed, patting the fuzzy neck as he reined in her lead. "What is it? Do you smell something?"

Whump.

…

He stumbled through the snow, occasionally tripping to fall flat on his face. He groaned, and pushed himself back up again.

_This is hopeless. I don't even know where I am._

Bloody, weak, and feeling distinctly sick from the attack by the Wampa, he trudged through the ice, unsure what fate had in store for him.

_This is it. The great Sith Lord and Jedi Luke Skywalker, Rogue Squadron Commander, hero of Yavin IV, is going to die in a snow bank after being attacked by a smelly Wampa. Oh yeah, he could take on Sith and Imperials, Jedi and Rebels, but he couldn't take on an over sized teddy bear with teeth. This is so embarrassing._

As if the wind was agreeing that here was where he'd die, it blew with enough force to knock him over again, and this time he didn't bother getting up.

"Luke…."

No….not possible.

More demanding now: "Luke!"

Breath caught in his throat, Luke closed his eyes tightly and turned his face upward, covered in snow. He was not yet willing to open his eyes.

_Master?_

He finally did open them, only to audibly gasp. There was Master Obi-Wan, a faded image in the blowing snow. Real or just a dream? Oh, it didn't matter. Luke had dreamt him countless times before. Desperate as a man dying of thirst reaching for a cool glass of water, he began his desperate crawl, dragging himself through the snow. His strength beginning to fail him, he reached out a wretched hand, begging, "Master, please, help me. Speak to me. Why haven't you spoken to me since Yavin IV? Were you ever even really there?"

Obi-Wan made no move to help the boy, nor answered his questions. Evenly and emotionlessly, he merely responded, "You will go to the Dagobah system."

"Dagobah? I don't understand." He pulled himself a few more inches, a foot or more across the frozen waste land, desperate to reach the one person he adored beyond all others; his savior.

"There you will learn from Yoda, the Jedi Master who instructed me."

Luke didn't respond, panting from his effort. Closer, closer. There, just in reach. Begging again, he whispered, "Master…." Reaching out. He had to know he was there, had to touch his hand, hear his voice in all his tenderness and love.

"Luke!"

Gone. Gone, no, it couldn't be gone! With the cry of his name the image disappeared, and Luke, defeated, had to lower himself back down into the snow.

"Master….wait, Master Obi-Wan, don't go."

"Ah, Luke, don't do this to me!"

It was Han, and yet while Luke realized this, he could not acknowledge it. Even with the smuggler's face right in his, he wasn't really seeing him. He was seeing Master Obi-Wan, who, no matter how much affection Luke held for Han, outstripped Solo any day of the week.

"Dagobah…."

"Give me a sign, here, kid!"

Captain Solo smacked and rubbed at Luke's frozen features in turns, reopening the slice on his face the Wampa had given him. Han whimpered slightly worriedly, and Luke opened his mouth to say something, but found he just couldn't. Everything was dark, and all his thought centered on one thought, and one thought only. The same thought that had plagued him day and night for over a year.

_Master….Wait…._

**To Be Continued…**

_Well, that's it for Mara, everyone. Say "Bye bye," now. You'll see her again at the very end in "Epilogue." You'll just have to wait to see what happens to her and her mini-Skywalker._

xInuyashaxangelx: I considered that to be a rather large plot twist. People generally consider children a substantial happening in the world.

Schnickledooger: RotS was good, but, now call me old fashioned, I just missed the plot so much….-sniff-

Well, it's going to be hard for her to kill him now that she's, you know, pregnant by him. Ah, it sucks to be Mara.

PrincessSkywalkerOrgana: That I highly doubt, but the characters do tend to change their minds on my a lot.

Stephanie C: The funny thing is, once he meets up with Yoda, he gets a talking to about how destiny rules supreme. He just explains that his destiny could be different from his father's. It's quite confusing for poor Luke-y.

Shi Feng Huang: Boy, I sure would be if I was her. Thanks, hope you'll keep reading!

Jedi-Princess: Cool, I'll have to look that up.


	28. Part 2 Chapter 6

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Six**

"I think we've got something, sir. The report is only a fragment from a probe droid in the Hoth system, but it's the best lead we've had."

Vader was irritated by the sound of the stuffy, stupid Admiral Ozzel arguing with Captain Piett. The why did not escape him – Captain Piett was surprisingly clever, and could possibly be a threat. Vader couldn't _stand _Ozzel. He made his nerves stand on edge. The Dark Lord of the Sith was just waiting for him to screw up for an excuse to get rid of him.

Finally, the pointless bickering, which seemed to confuse poor Captain Piett, who'd actually done a pretty good job, became to much for the Sith Lord. Sweeping his cape behind him, he stalked menacingly over to where Ozzel and the young, powerfully built General Veers had stopped.

"You found something?"

Ozzel and Veers fell back trembling, and Piett swallowed hard. However, he managed, "Yes, my Lord," and indicated the screen where a large power generator peeked out of the endless flows of snow. Vader did not need showing twice. Only Ozzel could be fool enough to deny that that was the Rebel base, and what with his son being, "the Hero of Yavin IV," (shame to the Sith at Yavin IV was so much more correct) that could only mean one thing.

"That's it! The Rebel base is there, and my son is with them." Odd, he didn't think he really considered Luke his son. Not after his shameless display on the Death Star trying to save Kenobi, and the terrorist act of blowing up said Death Star just a week later. Old affections die hard and you hold them in your hands long after they have turned to dust.

"My Lord, there are so many uncharted settlements. It could be smugglers, it could be-"

Ozzel didn't get a chance to continue as Vader had wheeled on the surprised Veers. "General Veers, prepare your men." To Piett, he added, "Set a course for the Hoth system."

…

"What is it with you and worrying me sick?"

"It's my newest game," Luke teased, grinning. "Maybe eventually you'll get worried enough to say something rash."

"Like, 'I love you?'" Leia was not impressed, and he grinned sheepishly at her from the hospital bed.

"Well, you know, _something_."

She shook her head. "You are impossible."

He might have said something else had Han not walked in, trailed by the Wookie and the droids. Luke's grin only widened, if entirely unconsciously. Han smirked back, giving him a wink.

"Well, look at you kid! You don't look so bad. In fact, I'd say you look strong enough to pull the ears off a gundark." Han knelt down next to the medical ward bed, affectionately tussling Luke's messy blond hair, making his grin spread all the wider.

"Thanks to you."

"That's two you owe me, junior."

"Han! Stop calling me that! I'm twenty!"

Han shrugged. "Sheesh, when'd you get to be so old? Oh well, you still act like a kid."

"I do not! Leia, tell Han I don't act like a kid."

She shook her head. "I'm not saying anything."

Han looked at Leia like he'd just noticed her, and Luke felt a curious twinge go through him. It passed in a moment. He wasn't jealous. There was nothing to be jealous about.

"Well, Your Highness, it seems you've been able to keep me around a little longer."

Luke blinked, and shot Leia a questioning look, who had stiffened up. "I had nothing to do with it. General Rieekan thinks it's dangerous for any ships to leave until the deflector shield is fully operational."

"That's a good story," Solo shrugged smoothly. "I think you just can't let a gorgeous guy like me out of your sight."

Luke snorted, and Leia shook her head. "I don't know where you get your delusions from, laser brain."

Chewbacca laughed good naturedly, and Luke smiled. Captain Solo, however, was not so happy. "Laugh it up, fuzz ball. But you didn't see us in the south passage. She expressed her true feelings for me."

Luke sparked to this, sitting up, glancing warily at the pirate. Oh, he had so better not be serious.

"My…why you stuck up, half witted, scruffy looking nerf herder!"

Luke grinned, confirming the smuggler's fib.

"Who's scruffy looking?"

_Jeeze, Han, focus._

Han playfully punched Luke in the shoulder, which did hurt a little as he was still pretty banged up. "I must have hit her pretty close to the mark to get her all riled up like that, huh, kid?"

"Han, stop calling me kid."

But this was not a point to be argued, as Leia had suddenly risen, looking furious. She glided smoothly over to Luke's sick bed, and he was momentarily frightened of her; she looked too innocent to be trusted. "Well, I guess you don't know everything about women yet, do you?"

Before he had the slightest idea as to what was happening, she'd grabbed his head – which was still sore – and was passionately kissing him. Too stunned to do anything, he remained frozen even after she released him to glide right out the room again. Solo was staring slack jawed from Luke to the door she'd left by. Luke blinked, thought, and finally….

"Whoo hoo! Yes! Alright! Did you see that? Did you see that! She kissed me! _She kissed me_! Whooo hoo!"

Captain Solo awkwardly patted his shoulder. "Will you excuse us for a second?" He went chasing down the hall after her, followed by Chewie and the droids, not the Luke cared in the slightest. He was still over joyed.

"This is so awesome! Hahahahah!"

…

"Chewie, take care of yourself, alright?"

Luke affectionately scratched a place behind the Wookie's neck, and Chewbacca lovingly drew Luke in for a massive hug. Chocking slightly, he winced and reminded, "Chewie…Chewie! Still kinda beat up, pal."

Whimpering, the large Wookie released him, and Luke instead went on to say his goodbyes to Han.

Solo was working anxiously on the severely beat up _Millennium Falcon_, talking with a repair droid, when he suddenly cut the droid off in mid, "beep," to say, "Hi, kid!"

"Han, stop calling m-"

Captain Solo cut Luke off as well, saying to the droid, "There's got to be a reason for it, check it at the other end. Hold on a second." He then turned worriedly back to Luke, who'd been about to walk off. "You alright?"

Luke managed a small smile and said, "Yeah." There was a moment of patient silence between them while Luke tried to say something and the pirate tried to encourage the question. Luke wanted so badly to just ask, "Are you in love with Leia? Is she in love with you?" but he didn't.

Instead, the smuggler said, "Be careful." He meant it sincerely, and Luke smiled again.

"You too."

That was all they could manage.

…

Luke watched the _Millennium Falcon _race away from the base at break neck speed, and he briefly extended his thoughts towards the ship. Leia was there, and Luke couldn't repress a twinge of jealousy. Not that there was anything to be jealous about. She wasn't in love with Han – he was the one she'd kissed, after all – but so long as she was with Solo she was safe, and that was all that mattered.

He might have dwelt on it a bit more had he not heard anxious whistles from R2D2 and the adrenaline filled call of, "Luke!" from Wedge. Grinning, Luke turned to the more favorable sight of the remainder of the flush faced Rogue Squadron – his squadron, now and forever. His men eternal, and he theirs. His best friends.

There was a lot of praise and smiles, and some cries to each other of, "See you at the rendezvous!" Wedge clapped him on the shoulder and wished him a sunny, "Good luck!" Luke might have stopped to talk with his buddies were not Artoo beeping and booping out of his wits.

"Alright, Artoo, we're going, we're going!" He slid into the cockpit of his X-Wing, feeling strangely at home – such a foreign feeling generally.

And, of course, once out into space, he was met with such unbridled freedom as to make his heart swell. That was something that never changed. He was born to fly. It completed him.

Something inside of him reminded that it was his father that had taught him all the tricks he knew, and Luke quickly pushed the thought away.

Now came decision time. He had a duty to the Rebellion – to Leia – to meet up with the others. He was Rogue Squadron commander, he was essential! However….Had Master Obi-Wan truly been a vision, or a figment of a dying man's final imagination. Was his beloved mentor truly telling him to go the Dagobah? Had it all been a dream?

_There's only one way to find out._

He set the coordinates into the computer and continued to fly casual, even though his astro-droid was now beside himself again.

"There's nothing wrong, Artoo. I'm just setting a new course. We're not going to regroup with the others….."

_We're going to the Dagobah system._

**To Be Continued…**

_Okay, people, I haven't been getting a lot of reviews lately, so, you know, I'm sad…. REVIEW!_

Stephanie C: Ah, your review made me smile so much

xInuyashaxangelx: I considered it way back when they'd first had their little tryst, but I thought, "Nah, she'd be obviously pregnant by that point." So it could never work. But it was such a tempting idea, that I just had to go with it….

PrincessSkywalkerOrgana: On to Dagobah! That's going to be fuuuuun….

Schnickledooger: Yeah, don't really care about Harry Potter anymore. I stopped caring after the fourth book. I wasn't even going to buy the fifth book, but my aunt insisted on getting it for me. But my friend did tell me what happens in the end, and I was like "O.O! Woah!" Moving on.

-giggle- Oh, I have so many evil things in store for Luke, one of which is finding out he's a daddy. Yup. It is going to be such fun, I am sooo evil! MUAHAHAHAH!

doreenthatshot: Thanks!

Shi Feng Huang: I considered trying to squeeze Mara in a again, but it really just didn't work. It works out better for all of her trials over two years to be explained at the end. That way the reader gets the unadulterated version the same way Luke gets it. Just another connection with the main charrie.

Not much for the man in black planned until Cloud City. For a long while about the only perspective is from Luke's point of view while on Dagobah. Tons of soul searching going on. It should be very interesting, so stay tuned!


	29. Part 2 Chapter 7

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Seven**

"Blast it, all the scopes are dead!"

Luke was maneuvering wildly to keep control of his X-Wing. So far, he was not succeeding. R2D2 was angrily whistling, and Luke could merely grit his teeth and hope for the best. Breaking through the atmosphere, the plane was plummeting to the earth much faster than it should, and he was struggling with the illusion that he was flying it and not it him. Finally, after several torturous moments, the X-Wing crash landed.

Right into a dirty, smelly, stagnant muddy water hole of Dagobah.

Luke groaned, swearing, and struck his helmet with the base of his palm.

_Just….great…_

Groaning, he clambered out, remaining easily balanced on even the rocking ship. Luke had an excellent sense of balance.

Just one of those things that happened, he guessed.

R2 beeped something, and Luke waved him off, starting to climb off the X-Wing's submerged nose. "No, Artoo, you stay here with the ship…" He'd just managed to clamber onto the shore line when he heard a distinct splash behind him. Wheeling, he noticed that his astro-droid was not where he'd left him, and swore again, crying, "Artoo?" A pause. Silence. "Artoo! Where are you?"

A moment later, R2D2's antenna eye piece poked out of the water's surface, and Luke sighed, shaking his head condescendingly. "Artoo, you be more careful." R2 beeped an assured response, but as he was moving in the opposite direction of the shore line, Luke shook his head and pointed out the right way. "Artoo – that way." Artoo hummed what Luke speculated was an embarrassed apology, before the young man continued to hunt along the misty shore line. Hunt for what? Was this Master Yoda just going to be found under a rock? He highly doubted it.

Luke suddenly heard a metallic scream behind him, and whirled around to find, once again, nothing – His astro-droid had completely disappeared again! "Artoo! Blast it!" He drew his lightsaber – his father's lightsaber – but kept it off, moving cautiously along the shore line. There was another scream and Luke had to tilt his head back to watch R2D2's graceful arch through the air, wincing when R2 landed with a thud in some moss. "Oh no…" Luke quickly chased after him, patting him and making sure that there wasn't any broken instruments. "Are you alright? Anything broken?" Artoo hummed calmly, and Luke patted the now terribly muddy top of his dome. "Maybe coming here was a bad idea….It's like something out of a dream, or-"

Before he could say anything else, he'd instinctively thrown himself across a log, arms weakly supporting him, and vomited anything his stomach might have held. Whimpering, he slumped against the side of the log without the disgusting bile, one arm clutching his stomach while the other held his head. There was a brief, blinding pain in his right hand, but all his discomforts passed within a moment. His astro-droid whistled worriedly, and after a second, Luke crawled back over to R2D2, clearing away muck from his lens. "Or maybe I'm just losing my mind."

He hadn't had that sort of an attack in a long while. What was also unusual was that it was always preceded by dreams or memories or voices of some kind. Not so this time. It felt like….

Like a premonition. A dark sense of foreboding.

_What am I doing here?_

…

"Yes, Admiral?"

Vader swung around irritatedly in his chair, his gloved fingers clenching the arm rests. He glared coldly at the shrinking form of now Admiral Piett. Nervously, he stiffened and reported, "Our ships have sighted the _Millennium Falcon_, Lord, but it has moved into an asteroid field, and we cannot risk-"

Vader inwardly snarled. They just didn't get it, did they? None of them did, not the clever Piett, nor the confident Veers. He didn't _care _about some bits of space rock floating around. What did it matter if they dented the hull a little? His Star Destroyer _Executor _could withstand far, far worse. The only thing that mattered was getting Luke back, and that was all. If that meant that they got knocked around a bit chasing the _Falcon _then so be it. But where ever the smuggler Han Solo and Luke's beloved fiancé Princess Organa were, the boy was sure to be, too. And, if in an attempt to keep them out of danger, he'd separated himself from them, this, too could be fixed. Corellian Smugglers and Alderaanian Princesses made such wonderful bait, and it was a bait that Luke could never, ever resist. It was the honey to draw the bee, the euphoria that his son just couldn't refuse. Oh yes, Luke would come, he would bend.

_He is mine._

And he would be. Just as soon as Piett, Veers, and all the rest got it through they're thick skulls.

"Asteroids do not concern me, Admiral. I want that ship, and not excuses." Or Piett would end up just the same as Ozzel, which would be a real shame. Piett was far more competent at his job than Ozzel ever had been.

"Yes, Lord," he allowed nervously, clearly disappointed with the results. Bowing stiffly, Vader watched him retreat from the room before turning his chair back around.

_There is no escape, Luke. _

…

Luke hooked R2D2 up to the power cable quite wearily. His now rather disgustingly tarnished R2 unit reflected exactly what Luke felt – pounded flat and left to dry. Still, it wasn't as bad as Tatooine. Nothing was ever as bad as Tatooine.

And the one thought it evoked.

_Master?_

Not so much as a sound from Obi-Wan since Hoth. Luke was really starting to feel the hopelessness of such a situation.

_Oh, Force, what am I doing here?_

Why was he so desperate to believe that some piece of Kenobi was still alive somewhere that he would believe anything, even a vision in a delirious state. How could he have been such a fool? And how the hell was he going to get his X-Wing out of that pond? There could be no two opinions about it; Luke was thoroughly screwed.

"Still…." He admitted to the impervious Artoo, "there's something familiar about this place…." Of course, he'd said that about Tatooine, too. And there had been…. "I feel like…I dunno…"

"Feel like what?"

Practically jumping out of his skin, Luke wheeled, drawing his lightsaber, to find –

A little green lizard thing?

The small, wrinkled creature had thrown his arms up, covering his face defensively. "Away, put your weapon. I mean you know harm." Talked funny, too. Slowly, Luke buckled his lightsaber back to its place on his belt, still watching the two foot tall…thing….warily. "I am wondering," it continued, lowering its arms slowly, "why are you here?"

Slowly, Luke answered, "My master told me to come here."

"Master? Slave, are you, then?"

Luke snarled, bristling. "No," he growled. He wanted to quip back that the elite Skywalkers were not slaves. Not that he knew of, anyway. But he didn't say that. "I," he corrected slowly, "am a Jedi."

"Ooohhh…." He answered reverently, hopping off the tree stump. "Jedi Padawan are you? Yoda, you seek Yoda!"

Luke's breath caught in his throat, and, unbelieving, he quickly leapt up from his seat, falling to his knees to be on eye level with the small alien. "You know the Jedi Master Yoda?"

"Mmm," it hummed, nodding enthusiastically. "Take him to you, I will. But first we must eat!" That, however, did dampen the young Jedi's zeal; after his latest spell, he wasn't quite in the mood to eat. "Come, come! Good food, yes, good! Come."

The little creature hopped away confidently and into the murky, fog ridden swamp. Luke blinked and momentarily held back. Why should he trust him? But, if he did know Yoda…. It verified that he had not dreamt it, that his master had dictated to him that he must go to Dagobah.

_Master, is this what you meant for me to do?_

No reply. Anxiously, Luke swallowed, and patted his astro-droid's no longer shinny dome. "Artoo…." R2D2 beeped excitedly. "Stay here and watch after the camp…."

_I've got a Jedi to find, even if I have to follow some swamp thing to do it. _

Because Master Obi-Wan said to. Therefore, it must be done.

…

"…And that, Lord Vader, was the last time they appeared on any of our scopes. Considering the amount of damage we've sustained, they must have been destroyed."

Captain Needa was another one of those men – terribly clever and absurdly loyal – that did not understand the vision the way Vader did. The way Luke had. His son had merely forgotten, become confused. He could sympathize to a point. The vision sometimes became distorted, unclear, confusing. But they had to persevere, remain true to the original idea. Luke's memory only needed to be sparked, and he, too, would see it. Men like Piett, Veers, Needa? Good men all of them, but far too blind to see the vision. Maybe it was something father and son were born to share.

If and when Vader got his son back.

"No, Captain, they're alive," he insisted with a snarl. He could tell, he _knew _that they were. They just couldn't not be. He needed them because Luke needed them, and above all, Vader needed Luke. To bring the vision back into focus.

To drive the aching hum from his soul.

"I want every ship available to sweep the asteroid field until they are found."

Needa seemed slightly surprised. It was a large request, and many men would be what he and Piett both deemed needlessly sacrificed. But there was no needless sacrifice here. All of it was for one goal, the ultimate goal, the shinning star – the vision, and the quest to bring his son home so that the vision could be restored to proper order and balance.

It must be, would be, done.

He watched the officers bow, slightly confused, before shutting off the holo.

_You are a Skywalker, Luke, and you are my son. Always. You can only fool yourself by thinking otherwise._

**To Be Continued…**

_Okay, so I ended up lying about the whole Vader not showing up again till Bespin thing. I think I'm correct now, and he won't show up until Cloud City, but the characters like to change they're minds on me. Frankly, writing about Yoda and Luke was so-so, but writing about Vader was so much fun! It was very awesome! Oh, and the whole vision thing; Truth is I'm a Scarlet Pimpernel addict who's been reading about the song "Falcon in the Dive," (which is an awesome song that you all must hear) and Chauvelin on Nan Knighton's really spiffy website. Anyway, it's mostly about how he realizes that the vision that used to fuel him has become distorted with bloodshed, and he's not as young as he used to be, but souls never age, and he just has to put blinders on and charge ahead. I think it's essentially true for Vader, too, since he's begging Luke at Bespin to join him so that they can bring order to the galaxy. And order and prosperity is what Anakin felt he'd brought to, "my new Empire." Um…ramble….I guess I'll answer reviews now, toodles!_

websurffer: Awww…. –snugs- Thanks! I should be distracted, but I'm lazy, so….Work is for suckers.

xInuyashaxangelx: Insert Yoda-esque fan fare.

PrincessSkywalkerOrgana: Poor Lukie doesn't like the heat, so Dagobah's going to be anything but pleasant….

Stephanie C: Yes, the long awaited and demanded Yoda has arrived!


	30. Part 2 Chapter 8

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Eight**

**A.N.: All of you – go read my latest little chapter for "Where You Were Going To," entitled Mistrust and Danger. Not for the stories' sake (nothing you need to know to understand this), but 1. I like it, and 2. I need you to read the disclaimer there. Thank you!**

Prince Xizor had finally been allowed in to see His Majesty, Emperor Palpatine, only to be brushed off yet again. The day was already bad, and the black, sulky mood he was in was only making it far worse. Thus, he was not exactly delighted when Palpatine informed him he had to wait because he was expecting a holo. From Vader.

Xizor hated him. No, it was more than hate. It was….all consuming to the point of being beyond hate. The Falleen's personal vendetta against the Dark Lord had not changed in twenty years. He still wanted him to die a horrible painful death. No, death was too good for him. He wanted him to _suffer_, and suffer unimaginable amounts of pain, the type of pain that ate at Xizor's soul night and day and gave no rest. Even that was merciful. He wanted him to _burn_.

He was not quite aware that he already had.

"What is thy bidding, my master?"

Xizor was brought out of his dark stupor by the voice of that which he reviled, and found himself glaring at the hologram, clenching and unclenching his fine green fists.

"There is a great disturbance in the Force," Palpatine said vaguely, his hands tucked into his overly long sleeves.

At great length, the Sith Lord admitted, "I have felt it."

"Something is happening with your son. I believe he is continuing his training to become a Jedi. I sense something else, but it is unclear."

_Skywalker's alive?_

Xizor nearly chocked, his eyes widening. When had this happened? The boy was supposed to have been dead for two years! Unless Vader had another son that no one else knew about, but he highly doubted that. Well did the Falleen remember Darth Vader's obsessive protectiveness over the boy, especially in the presence of the leader of Black Sun. Subtle jabs aimed at wounding the Dark Lord had occasional been directed at the child, but as the Imperial Prince tended to nervously skirt the elegant lizard, these moments were few and far between.

"Yes, my master."

Pause for effect. "He could destroy us." Another pause as Vader seemed to stiffen.

"He's just a boy." Wrong, he was a grown up boy, one that apparently had abandoned daddy dearest – to the immense heart ache of Vader – and had gone Jedi and Rebel. Xizor could feel a wide grin spread across his mouth, his lavender eyes twinkling in the dim light of the Coruscant throne room. "Obi-Wan can no longer help him."

"The Force is strong with him, he must not become a Jedi."

Vader paused almost guiltily for a moment, and Xizor knew exactly what that meant – Vader would have to kill the very thing he'd so lovingly protected for eighteen years to keep it from destroying him. Oh, what radiant happiness fate had bestowed!

"If he could be turned…He cannot escape the Dark Side forever. And you did agree, my master, that I would have some time in tracking him down."

"You've had a year."

"I need just a little longer, a month, maybe less. We are in pursuit of bait which he could never resist."

That seemed to please the emperor, for he smiled, displaying yellowed teeth. "Very good, Lord Vader. See to it that it is done."

So, Vader thought to turn the boy. Well, that was something Xizor must insure never came to fruition. Not only would the death of his only son plague Vader constantly, it would put him in a bad light with Palpatine. The Falleen briefly rubbed his scaly hands in anticipation, his soul filled with elation. Oh, this was so much better than physical torture. This was something that went beyond the destruction of Lord Vader.

…

The rain pounded heavily against the little hut, and Luke was glad to be in out of it. Of course, he did feel slightly bad for poor R2D2, but the hut was crowded enough without the droid. Besides, maybe he'd get a little cleaner this way. Resting his head on one hand, Luke sighed, staring out at the wall. After what seemed like a millennia, the swamp creature paused in his busy work to hop over and poke at the….whatever….bubbling away in a pot. Nodding satisfied, he pointed at it, and declared, "Time to eat, yes?" He then went back to his busy work, and Luke grimaced.

"Um, I'm really not-"

"Good food, good, yes!"

"Look, I'm sure it's delicious, but I just don't understand why we can't see Yoda now!"

"Patience!" the small creature demanded, glaring. "For the Jedi it is time to eat to."

_Not for this one…._

Just to please, Luke spooned some of the homemade crud into a dish, nervously tasting.

_Urgh…This is going to do nothing for my stomach._

"How far is Yoda, will it take us long to get to him?"

"Not far. Yoda not far. Patience. Soon, you will be with him." The green swamp thing hopped over, spooning some of the stew into his own dish while Luke moved out of the way. "Tell me, why must you become Jedi?"

Luke paused, almost guiltily. _Even I'm not sure why…_

"Well," he sighed, trying to think about it. "Mostly it's because of Master Obi-Wan, I guess."

"Oooh, Obi-Wan, powerful Jedi was he."

Luke blinked, and finally shook his head. "Oh, come on, you don't even know who I am, how could you know Master Obi-Wan?" Finally, the frustration, the rage, the deep depression at the mere thought of Obi-Wan was too much, and he angrily shoved his bowl away. "I don't even know what I'm doing here, we're wasting our time!"

It was like a dark pallor had settled over the hut, and Luke uncrossed his arms, blinking and looking around.

To himself, or to someone else, the creature said, "I cannot teach him. The boy has no patience."

Luke's head spun momentarily as he stared. Wait…what?

And then, reverberating throughout the tiny hut: _He will learn patience._

_Obi-Wan!_

"Master!" Luke could not contain the cry, trying to stand only to bonk his head on the low ceiling. Nursing the wound, he sat back down, searching the room wildly with his eyes. "Master Obi-Wan, where are you, please, let me see you! Don't go away again!"

The thing seemed to study him with great scrutiny for a moment before continuing to speak. "Mmmm… Much anger in him. Like his father."

_Like…my father? _But, no! Luke was nothing like him, he'd sworn he'd get past that! Was he still unsuccessful after two years of trying?

_Was I any different when you taught me?_

_I'm sure you weren't like me, _Luke vehemently swore. _I'm sure you were pure and perfect and so much better than I ever could be._

"Hah." The creature shook his head. "He is not ready."

Wait…this was….Yoda….

_Well….bloody…hell…._

"Yoda…I am ready! I…Master Obi-Wan, tell him! Tell him I am ready. I can be a Jedi!"

"Ready are you? What know you of ready?" The open disdain with which the creature – Yoda – spoke, made Luke sink down to the ground. "For eight hundred years have I trained Jedi. My own council will I keep on who is to be trained!" But…but he needed this. "A Jedi must have the deepest commitment. The most serious mind." Yoda indicated Luke to the invisible Jedi master, causing the boy to look around again. "This one for a long time I have watched. Ambitious, even as a child. Mmmm…" He shook his green head disapprovingly. "Power, sought he. Greed, a path to the Dark Side."

"Well, can you blame me?" Luke had shot foreword, caring nothing that he was arguing with the ultimate Jedi Master. "Will you blame me? For events which I had no control over? Will you condemn me for being raised by my father, trained by the emperor? My entire life I was surrounded by the Dark Side! Isn't it enough that I am of the Light now, struggling to become a Jedi?"

Yoda shook his head. "Of the Light you are not."

"But I am, I-"

"Once touched, the Dark Side taints."

Luke felt defeated, and he looked away again. "Then…I am doomed to return to the emperor…" He closed his eyes to keep them from misting up in pain.

_Master…._

No reply. It wasn't fair…

Yoda, however, seemed touched, and continued his conversation with Obi-Wan. "He is too old. Too old to begin the training."

Yoda's voice had softened, and Luke looked up again, blinking. Finally, he pleaded, "But I've learned so much, and there's so much more I want to know…"

Yoda shook his head again, sighing. "But will he finish what he begins?"

Luke leaned in again, still as determined as ever. "I won't fail you." Yoda gave him a piercing stare, but still the boy did not back down. "I am not afraid."

"But you are…." Luke blinked. "Great fear I sense in you, great unrest. Same as your father, when brought before me, he was. A danger to the Jedi, I proclaimed, and still young Skywalker was trained. All too true…my words became…." Did he sense….regret? It was fleeting, and Luke felt as thought they were emotions he was not truly privy to. Yoda turned back to the next Skywalker, staring him down. "Tell me, what fear you?" Now it was Luke's turn to look down. "Great nightmares have you had…yes…ever since you were a boy."

Luke paused, astounded. "But how do you-"

"Know much, I do. Teach you I can, but….Your fears, your ambitions, your attachments…Leave them behind, you must, or blind shall you remain."

Luke hesitated for an instant. "Can you save me from the Dark Side?"

The small, old Jedi shook his head. "That you must do yourself."

**To Be Continued…**

_Hold on, people, because here's where the fun begins. Oh, and, SUBLIMINAL MESSAGE Read SUBLIMINAL MESSAGE my SUBLIMINAL MESSAGE fic SUBLIMINAL MESSAGE "Where You Were Going To: Mistrust and Danger" _

xInuyashaxangelx: You know, he'd probably start bashing his head against the wall if he knew.

doreenthatshot: Thanks!

PrincessSkywalkerOrgana: Not since Tatooine. And he's used to a cooler climate, since it's bound to be a little bit chilly on a starship what with it being in the vacuum of space and all.

Stephanie C: Neither can Luke

Sleepwalker: Yeah! –snuggle- I'm really glad you liked it! And I hope you'll keep reading. Have fun on HL

Cookiemunster: -snork- Ah, you rock so hard core

TorontoBatFan: Yeah! You're back! Happy dance. Be careful about the cave though. Oh, such fun planned for that scene! What lil' Lukie fears most is not his papa, but…well…I won't spoil the surprise.


	31. Part 2 Chapter 9

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Nine**

_Run, run, run, must run, don't stop._

Panting, exhausted, Luke dodged root, limb and fog as he raced, trying to balance his physical exertion while listening to the Jedi master strapped to his back. It seemed….odd. He had expected Yoda to be like Obi-Wan; forgiving, understanding, and certainly human. Luke had expected to find another relationship consumed in love, a third father figure. He'd gotten nothing of the sort. He got a small green lizard thing that whacked him repeatedly with a his Gimer Stick should Luke fail in something, and that was something Obi-Wan had certainly never done.

Good, old soft touch Obi-Wan. Luke missed him desperately.

Yoda had demanded that he leave his attachments behind, which the boy was struggling to do, but did make it easier. He made no sort of move to allow Luke to anxiously suction himself to the Jedi. It was probably just as well.

"Run! Yes. Remember, a Jedi's strength flows through the Force. But beware the dark path." Luke found he had to stop, as if something was holding his legs down. "Anger, fear, aggression. Start down the dark path, you did, easily it flowed. Fight you now to regain peace." Luke panted, feeling as though his lungs were on fire. "If once you start down the dark path again, forever will it dominate your destiny. No escape a second time! Consume you, it will, as it did Obi-Wan's apprentice…."

After a moment, Luke managed to regain enough breath to whisper, "Father…Is it possible to become immune to the Dark Side?"

Yoda shook his head, and Luke felt as though the small Jedi master had grown inconceivably heavy. "No, no. Fight it constantly you must."

"But how am I to anchor myself in the Light?"

"You will know how. When you are calm, at peace."

Calm, yes…Luke took deep, slow breaths, closing his eyes against the gloom of the swamp. The very mist seemed to be sucked in with each breath he took, making him cough.

"Remember, a Jedi uses the Force for knowledge and defense. _Never _attack."

Luke's eyes opened, and he quickly asked, "But tell me why I can't-"

"No, no, there is no why!" No why? But…But…From the time Luke could talk he'd always been asking questions. The obvious five year old things, like who kept the stars in the sky, or how such and such a thing worked, or where things came from. But more than that he'd asked questions about his mother, about his father, the Jedi, the Old Republic. He'd asked questions about the Empire, what would happen when he got older and became Emperor. With Obi-Wan he'd asked about his mother, he'd asked about his father, the Force, loyalty. With Leia he asked about human nature. With himself….

_Why am I like this._

"There is no why. Nothing more will I teach you today." Confused, Luke carefully began to shrug off the pack. "Clear your mind of questions, mmm…" Clear his mind of questions. How? That was a question.

No why. It didn't make sense, but he put out every effort not to question why he couldn't question. Instead, he busied himself by scooping his flight jacket from off the log where he'd dropped it, sliding his arms into it. He paused for a moment, shivering. Peering into the distance, he saw…no…he felt…something.

"Something's not right here…..I feel cold."

Yoda forlornly poked at the ground with his stick, shaking his head. "That place is strong with the Dark Side of the Force. A domain of evil it is. In it you must go."

Luke turned briefly around to stare at Yoda, blinking. Was he nuts? Just the brief exposure to the Dark Side on board the Death Star had been traumatizing. Yoda was actually purposefully _sending _him into evil?

The wordless, soundless language that was the Force replied that he must face it.

_But will I come out conquering it or it me?_

You will not know, he was told, he felt, until you try.

"What's in there?" he whispered, still trembling.

"Only what you take with you."

And he was packing enough emotional baggage for five people. Still, he cautiously began to strap his belt back on when he was interrupted by the Jedi master once again.

"Your weapons…you will not need them."

Luke glanced long and hard into the darkness before shaking his head no, and Yoda shrugged in response.

_Better safe than sorry._

Without a backward look, he walked in.

…

He'd crawled into the cave warily, casting his eyes everywhere. Nervously, he pushed a snake away from a branch far too near his head for comfort before moving on. The Dark feeling only increased, and, instinctively, Luke unclipped his lightsaber.

And from the shadows, as if it had just materialized there, came….

Himself.

The Lord of the Sith he'd once been entered, smug, and just as powerful as ever, the pulsing red lightsaber held at the ready. Luke gasped, falling back, retreating in his brief moment of terror.

Why couldn't he breath?

He was pressed upon by himself, and ultimately had to raise the lightsaber to keep himself from getting killed. His movements felt slow, like he was moving through soup, or a dream. Block, slash, dodge, step, and the process was repeated until….

Nothing. His other self was suddenly gone, and the panting, tangible, real Luke was left to know it had only been a vision.

One that he'd never seen the end of.

Who could win such a battle? The Light he was trying so hard to obtain, or the Darkness he'd always been. He might never know. He was….afraid. He did not want to fight such a battle, he wanted no temptations. But come it would, he knew, and far sooner than he liked. Finally, he turned off his lightsaber, clipping it back to his belt, and scurried out of there as fast as he could.

He still could hardly breath.

…

"Tell me, this war, what do you fight?"

Luke looked up from his dinner, blinking momentarily. He carefully swallowed what he'd been chewing, puzzling over the question. "What do we fight?" The Jedi master nodded, and Luke sucked in a breath, trying to gather his thoughts. "Well, the Empire, Master Yoda, the-"

He stopped, as Yoda shook his head crossly, tapping his Gimer Stick on the ground to emphasize his point. "No! Trivial, that is. In the end, loss or win of such war matters not! See you not?" Luke stared at him, confused, and shook his head. The weary master sighed, seemingly dissatisfied. Well, what other reasons were there for joining the Rebellion? Luke had merely followed Leia, searching for a place he'd be accepted. Now he was, and fought the Empire. He'd sworn to, vowed to, and it struck him that in agreeing to go to Dagobah, he had sort of backed out of a promise to the Rebels. "Never were the Skywalkers a way to knock down tyrannical governments. A symbol, they were."

"I…I don't understand."

"See you, Luke, what you fight is not the Galactic Empire. If case that were, won by now, you would have."

Luke couldn't help but bristle. "Look, why don't you try taking on the whole Imperial Navy with the resources we have!"

"Listen you will!" And for his outburst Luke received a sharp whack from Master Yoda's stick. Luke quickly shut up. "What you are fighting, in end of the battle, is your worst enemy." Luke leaned in now, intrigued by the inflection in the Jedi's voice. "In the end, fighting yourself, you are."

_The cave…_

"A key you are, young Luke. Lost that fight, your father did, and of the Dark Side he became. That is why so important to the Jedi are you. To fight the Empire your destiny is not! To show others that you fight something far more terrifying it is. Giving them the courage to try, you are. But, lose should you, this all consuming battle, if fail in your destiny-"

"I will sooner die than face that," Luke vehemently swore. He'd said it before, he'd say it again. He would not go back to the Dark Side. "And die you will. Die. And be born into something else entirely."

The same question as before sprung up as Luke shivered, and he had to ask, "Am…Am I doomed to repeat the mistakes of others?"

"What believe you?"

"I believe that…I was told that….That we all are unique. That the end result depends on the person."

Yoda nodded sagely, satisfied. "Wise is the one who told you that."

Luke gulped, looking away. Leia. Leia had told him that. Sweet, perfect, wise Leia, who accepted him as he was, and demanded nothing of him. She understood him in the way that he didn't even understand himself.

_Yes…she is….And I love her for it._

Aloud, he asked, "Is that true?"

Yoda carefully climbed back into his chair, looking very tired, and it left Luke to wonder exactly how old the Jedi master really was. Wearily, he responded, "Someday, know will you. Then, over, shall your battle be."

Luke gently tucked the ragged blanket around the tired lizard, settling back to watch him carefully.

"Then we see who you really are."

**To Be Continued…**

_REVIEW AND DO IT NOW! Seriously, people, it's not that hard. I'm okay with you just saying "Cheese!" True, it makes no sense, but…I prefer longer ones, however. You know, some good feedback on what I did, what you liked, what could be improved, etc._

Stephanie C: Indeed. I was really looking foreword to that last scene with Yoda and Luke, and I think it turned out pretty dang spiffy!

PrincessSkywalkerOrgana: Thanks.

xInuyashaxangelx: More

Stefanie2: -bows- Thank you very much!

websurffer: Oh yeah. I am the ultimate in crafty.


	32. Part 2 Chapter 10

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Ten**

"Concentrate…"

Legs crossed, Luke sat in silent meditation, slowly regulating his breath, trying to remain calm.

"Yes. Good. Calm, yes," Yoda praised, and a small smile crept onto Luke's face. This was wonderful. He felt wired, alive, and yet so calm, so relaxed. It was perfect. It was like being surrounded in perpetual light, and he half listened as Yoda continued his instructions.

"Through the Force other places you see. The future…the past…."

The past? Like…his mother? That dream! He'd entirely forgotten! The one he'd had right after Master Obi-Wan's death as they desperately tried to escape the Death Star. Oh, his beautiful, perfect mother. How she had cried, and no matter how much Luke had pleaded with her, nothing could get her to stop. Could he talk with her? No, she was a part of the past, and even if meditating, he was stuck in the present.

Before he had a clue what was happening, Luke had fallen foreword, retching his guts out, his head spinning. He rolled a few paces away from the bile, clawing at his head as he pitifully moaned. And then….sound from his lips, but even he couldn't have known the words. "Leia! Han! No!"

As swiftly as it had come, it was gone, and he was clawing his way back to his feet, shakily grabbing at branches and vines as he worked. Yoda shook his head, tapping at the boy's calf with his Gimer Stick.

"Sit down, you should. Vision through the Force you have had?"

Trembling, Luke did sit, shaking his head as his shoulders began to quake. "Master…I've had these visions…oh, Force, they're horrible, these nightmares…ever since Tatooine. But it's never been this real before. I could see….I could…and…" How to make it coherent? "Leia and Han, were-"

"Calm!" ordered the Jedi master, and Luke resumed the position he'd been in for meditation. "Now….What saw you?"

Luke closed his eyes, trying to breath calmly, his shoulders quivering. "I saw a city in the clouds."

Yoda nodded sagely. "Mmmm. Friends you have there."

Trying to be patient, Luke did not move. Distressed, he whispered, "They were in pain!"

"It is the future you saw."

The future. That was one thing Luke had never wanted to see. It was too painful, carried far too many burdens. Yet here it was, all the same, and what a weight it brought with it! Finally, Luke's eyes shot open, and looked pleadingly at the small Jedi master. "Will they die?"

Yoda scrunched up his face momentarily, before closing his eyes. "Difficult to see. Always in motion is the future."

They stared at each other for a moment, one calm, the other desperate. Finally, Luke just had to bolt, snatching up his jacket once more. "I've got to go to them."

Yoda's words, however, rooted him the spot. "Decide how to best help them you must. If you go now, help them you could…but…Destroy everything for which they have fought and suffered."

Luke fell against a tree, pounding his fist against the unforgiving surface. He shuddered, whimpering and begging, thinking he might very well cry for them. The Rebellion. It must not die. Worse, not by actions of himself. But Leia, Han… If there was one thing Luke feared it was loss. It had happened too many times to not remain a constant trouble. And the loss of Han or Leia….

_I would die without them!_

But the question was, would they die by his having gone to save them?

Swallowing hard, he turned back to the Jedi master, resolute, but not calm.

_I won't know until I try._

…

"Luke, you must complete the training!"

It was the same argument he'd heard night and day since he'd decided to leave. Carefully moving a snake from its resting spot on the nose of his X-Wing, Luke cringed, inwardly begging for strength.

Turning, his eyes held the wild look of grief that Leia so often comforted. He _had _to save her, as she so often saved him. "I can't keep the vision out of my head!" he pleaded, hopping off the ladder and just begging Yoda to understand. "They're my friends, I have to go to them."

"You must not go!"

"But Han and Leia will die if I don't!"

"You don't know that."

A pause.

_No…not again…not another vision, please!_

But there, materializing behind the tangible Jedi master stood Obi-Wan Kenobi, a shimmering blue mist in the night. "Not even Yoda can see that."

Luke didn't dare move, staring wild eyed at his master. Obi-Wan smiled sadly, gesturing to Luke, palms up. Carefully, Luke took a few steps foreword. "Alright…" he admitted, whimpering. "Now I'm afraid." He moved past Yoda without giving him a glance, so close to Kenobi. Close enough to touch, but Luke knew what he would be greeted with – emptiness. The same as always. He reached out and nothing reached back. "I'm afraid that this is another dream, a nightmare…."

The old man's arms, however, were now fully outstretched to Luke, and he rushed into them, unable to stop himself. The powerful arms of the Jedi wrapped around him, and Luke felt…light, warmth. Security, peace was here. Beyond the fact that this was the master he adored, it was that he was touching the Force, real, and tangible, and terribly beautiful.

"I've missed you so much," Luke whispered, a tear forming in his eye. "You don't know how hard it's been, so many times I wanted to give up and die…." He was a coward though. No matter how many times he unclipped his lightsaber and swore this would be the time he did it, he always put it back on his belt.

"I was there to keep you from dying," admitted Obi-Wan, stroking the boy's hair. For the moment, Han and Leia were forgotten in the simple peace of having Obi-Wan again. Of course, a moment was all that was to be spared.

"Master…surely you understand? I've got to, I can help them."

"This is a dangerous time for you, Luke," admonished Kenobi, but Luke did not cower. "You will be tempted by Dark Side of the Force."

Luke took a few steps back, shaking his head. So, Master Obi-Wan didn't think he should go either. And, it was true, Luke didn't know how well he could withstand the Dark Side…

"Yes, yes!" Yoda was reproving as well. "To Obi-Wan you listen. The cave! Remember your vision at the cave," he stressed, and Luke had to gulp, nod. It as true….

But then….

"You don't understand!" he cried out to them, pleading. "They mean so much to me! I would die for them! I would…I…I would become a Lord of the Sith if it meant saving them."

Luke clapped his hands over his mouth after he said it, shaking his head and backing further up. No….he hadn't said that….He didn't mean it. But he did! He would do _anything _to protect Han and Leia. The ultimate sacrifice, whatever it took.

"I…." He tried to correct himself, but there was nothing to be done.

"That is why you must not go!" stressed Yoda, and Obi-Wan also agreed.

"You cannot deny the truth of your own words, Luke. Spoken in haste they may have been, but it is what you meant."

Luke tried to formulate some sort of protest, but there was still nothing.

"A compassionate heart have you," Yoda nodded. "But destroy you it can."

"I've learned so much, though! Master Yoda, I will return and finish what I've begun, you have my word." He had to make himself go, and thus fell to organize the rest of his things for the X-wing.

"It is you and your abilities the emperor wants, that is why your friends are made to suffer."

Luke merely glanced at the mentor he loved. "That is why I have to go."

"Luke, I don't want to lose you to the emperor the way I lost Anakin."

He knew every button to push, didn't he? Luke thought it a rather low jab at getting him to stay, and for a moment he stopped, then shook his head again.

"Stopped they must be! On this depends!" Yoda was crying, and Luke clawed wearily at his face, no longer sure what to do. "Only a fully trained Jedi Knight with the Force as his ally can defeat Vader and his emperor. If you end your training now, if you chose the quick and easy path, as Vader did, you will become an agent of evil!"

"No!"

"Yes!

"And what should I do to stop it?" he snarled. "Sacrifice Han and Leia?"

Yoda's chest puffed up, and met the boy for his passion filled glare. Too much passion. Jedi did not give in to passion. But he did. "If you honor what they fight for…yes."

There was a long moment of silence while Luke just collapsed. He pulled his knees up to his chin, arms resting on them. He then just buried his face in the arms, shaking. What did they want him to do? _What?_ Did they want him to go insane!

Gently, he could hear Master Obi-Wan say, "If you choose to face your father, you will do it alone. I cannot be there to help you."

_Alone?_

Luke looked up, weary and in anguish. "You promised you'd always be with me."

"This is a battle that you must face yourself," the old man said with a shake of his head.

_What do you want of me!_

It wasn't fair! It felt like the Force was ripping him in two, demanding things of him, screaming at him. He was so turned around he didn't know which way was up anymore. Or maybe he never did. What did they expect of him? Couldn't they understand? Couldn't they feel the pain that ate at his very soul and gave no rest, merely howled and galled and pushed in a voice all it's own?

Luke gulped, and sucked in a breath. Finally, he got up, closing his eyes tightly. "I understand."

He looked at each of them, prayed, and bolted up the ladder.

"Artoo, fire up the converters."

**To Be Continued…**

_Wow, half way through ESB already! Well, there's still a ways to go till Part Two is over with, so stay tuned, people!_

Anthestria: I plan on using him once more, but more in a reference. But who knows? I'm still desperately trying to get my hands on a copy of Shadows of the Empire, and it is looking less and less likely that I'll have a chance. Stupid James Fenimore Cooper. I hate Last of the Mohicans. –kills it- There! Die!

Locathah: Why am I not surprised someone said cheese?

-nodnod- Ah, yes, agreed, that is a problem. Not sure if it's one I quite know how to fix yet, but I still thank you very much

PrincessSkywalkerOrgana: Thanks, I like that too! I really loved Lukie freaking out in this chapter.

HermioneSkywalker: COOKIE! –tackle glomps.- -munches-

Stephanie C: Maybe it's another one of those things where it makes perfect sense to me when I write it, and afterwords people are like WTF? ..'….Like Luke's catarsis on Tatooine. Unlike this, however, that will for certain be explained later.


	33. Part 2 Chapter 11

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Eleven**

The banquet room was very…..bright. Too bright. Vader made a ridiculous contrast to the sunny white tones of the room. Still, it didn't really matter. He only had one reason for being here, and it was not for lunch. He could hear a small click as the bounty hunter, Boba Fett, adjusted his stance behind him. Fett didn't blend in exactly either. But, like the Dark Lord of the Sith, his purpose for being on Bespin was singular, and he would stop at nothing to get it.

Even clash horribly with some stupid room.

They had different purposes, but they could prove mutually beneficial to the other. Vader would have Solo in order to bring in his son. Fett needed Solo to bring to Jabba the Hutt. The symbiosis remained most promising.

If only that stuffy Calrissian would hurry up and deliver his part of the bargain.

There was a sound of voices outside the door, and Vader could hear Fett stiffen. The bounty hunter was too much like a panther for Vader to really trust him – quiet, dangerous, and always ready for the strike. But as panthers were respected in the wilds, so was Fett in his chosen profession. Bounty Hunting. A useful practice, if, in Vader's eyes, an unpleasant one.

The doors opened, and the look of stunned surprise on the faces of Solo and the princess were frozen only for a moment. Solo began firing, and Vader quickly rose, blocking the shots with his hand.

_Child's play._

No mere smuggler could hope to take on the Dark Lord, nor Boba Fett, who was looming menacingly in the corner. There were to be no questions about it; their fate – their doom – was utterly sealed.

_No one to help you now. Or do you think Skywalker will come to save his friends?_

That's what Vader was counting on. He'd made a gamble, arranging this little party, and he'd be damned if he'd lose the bet.

"We'd be honored if you'd join us."

Solo and Calrissian shared a look, an all too unpleasant one, and Vader speculated his saw the later flinch under the heavy stare. "I had no choice. They arrived right before you did." Their timing couldn't have been more perfect. "I'm sorry." Well, what did Solo expect? Calrissian was of the same type of blood – scoundrel blood. He had his own aims to meet, and Solo was simply a way to achieve the end. The means became unimportant to people such as Solo and Calrissian. And even Vader.

But the end can never justify the means. No matter how glorious the end is, the means must be achieved in a manner which agrees with justice. Otherwise, tyranny reins.

Which, of course, it did.

Solo seemed to relax, slipping his hand into that of the nervous Organa. "I'm sorry, too." There was something to be said about the scum of the galaxy – they didn't complain when fate came knocking on their door. It was an admirable trait.

Vader watched them as they swallowed their pride and fear, walking in to sit with an expression that clearly read, "Give 'em hell."

…

_Not so proud and rebellious now, are we?_

Questioning Solo was needless. He knew everything he wanted; he would soon have everything he wanted.

For a brief instant, the father wanted desperately to know every detail about what had happened to his son – his baby boy, even at the age of twenty – in the two years he'd been separated from him. Solo knew, he'd been with him. But he wasn't about to give either the smuggler the satisfaction of seeing the Dark Lord of the Sith in desperate straights, or even satisfy that inner part of a lighter self.

That self had died long ago. No, Luke did not bring it back. That was just his mind playing tricks on him.

Of this, he had to be sure.

It was the vision he wanted, not his son. His son could complete the vision, that was all.

Sure. That was it.

The realization of the limitless, terrible pain that was coming had all too clearly dawned on the prisoner, and his eyes rolled with fear not even he could disguise from the machine to the black creature about to switch it on. He motioned for Solo to be lowered down – let the torture begin.

Seeing it would be unnecessary, and bring no real satisfaction. It wasn't, he determined, Solo's fault that his son had turned Jedi. That was Obi-Wan's fault, and he'd met his justice already. As much vengeance as Vader craved, there was really no one he could turn it on and be met with equal satisfaction.

The satisfaction would come when Luke bowed prostrate before the emperor once more, his heart in allegiance to his father – his son would be a Dark Lord of the Sith.

He'd settle for nothing less.

Without so much as a backward glance, he strode out the door, headless of the howling screams of pain he left behind him. Calrissian, standing awkwardly next to Fett, seemed to wince. The stupid man had a conscience after all. How extraordinary. However, as soon as Vader appeared in the doorway, Calrissian pounced on him. Trying to make amends with said conscience? The man had no staying power.

"Lord Vader."

Ignored. Instead, he told Fett what he wanted to know: "You may take Captain Solo to Jabba the Hutt after I have my son." No, stop saying that! Skywalker, just say Skywalker. Don't say son!

Another scream pierced the air, and Calrissian winced again, as if he, too, were in pain.

"He's no good to me dead," reminded Fett obstinately.

"He will not be permanently damaged," assured Vader, striding down the hall. Discussion over. But not for the stubborn Calrissian.

"Lord Vader, what about Leia and the Wookie?" So he called her Leia, now, did he? That chalked up to three people in adoration of the princess. Vader simply could not comprehend how one girl got so much attention.

_Should have gone with Luke. The others aren't good enough for her._

Of course, in Vader's opinion, Luke was actually too good for Leia. But whatever made his son happy.

Skywalker. Not his son. He had to get out of that habit until he finally had Luke back.

Until he called him, "father." That was what Vader didn't realize he secretly longed for – that one word hinged his happiness.

"They must never again leave this city," he brushed it off. He didn't care about some two meter fur ball, nor really about Luke's kinda sorta fiancé.

"That was never a condition of our agreement, nor was giving Han to this bounty hunter!" Calrissian obviously was feeling the sting of his betrayal – even now he called the victims by their first names.

"Perhaps you think you're being treated unfairly?"

Oh, he obviously did. Frankly, Vader didn't really care.

Calrissian gave, and muttered, "No…."

"Good. It would be unfortunate if I had to leave a garrison here."

…

"What if he doesn't survive? He's worth a lot to me."

It seemed extraordinary that so many people could really want that scum Solo alive. Vader was uninterested in Fett's nervous complaint. "The Empire will compensate you if he dies."

He could feel a small wave of horror and derision wave off of Calrissian, Organa, Solo, and the Wookie. Solo wouldn't be feeling any emotions for a while, very, very soon.

The Wookie, however, had erupted into a crazy furry of passion, knocking Vader's Storm Troopers and Calrissian's Ugnaughts all over the place. Fett raised his weapon, and Vader quickly knocked it down again.

_Idiot._

He did not want them damaged.

Solo, however, despite the desperate fix he was in, was quickly calming the Wookie down, shouting at him in what seemed between the two to be affection. Odd.

"Save your strength. They'll be another time." Brave words for someone who wasn't even really a part of the Rebellion. "The princess – you have to take care of her. You hear me?" The girl was circled perpetually by men. It was incomprehensible.

For a long moment, the smuggler and the princess merely stared at each other. And then they leaned in, clearly not caring if they were being watched.

And started eating each other's face.

_There is no way I'm watching this._

He waved his hand and Storm Troopers quickly pulled them off each other, dragging Solo to the carbon freezing chamber.

"I love you!"

Well, so much for her being Luke's fiancé. It never would have worked out anyway.

"I know."

_Jeeze, at least my boy would have said, "I love you," back._

How could that silly girl be stuck on the rogue smuggler? Another unintelligible thing.

The rest went far too slow. Solo was finally lowered in, the Wookie was screaming again, and the acrid smell of liquid carbonite filled the air. Several minutes passed, the air was tense. Calrissian, the Wookie, and the princess, hoped it worked so that Solo would come out alive. Vader really didn't care about that. The out of pocket to Boba Fett would be minor. He wanted it to work so that he didn't inadvertently kill his son. That would be messy.

With a clang, the body, frozen in its last moments of horror, lay dormant on the floor, Calrissian anxiously checking the status.

"Well, Calrissian, did he survive?"

"Yes, he's alive. And in perfect hibernation."

That was good. Very good. To lose Luke to a poor job of carbon freezing….Not that he cared. Luke was not his son. Not yet.

Inwardly, Vader was smirking, tugging at painful scar tissue. Turning to the restless Fett, he finally said, "He's yours, bounty hunter." To the Ugnaughts: "Reset the chamber for my son." Again! He really needed to stop doing that. Before he could give the horrified princess a look, an officer had bounded up to him, bringing the best news he'd heard in a long time. "Skywalker has just landed, my Lord." Vader was going to savor this moment with relish.

_No escape, Luke._

Of course, soon, Luke would see the truth. And once he knew the truth, then why would he ever want to escape?

"Good. See to it that he finds his way in here. Calrissian, take the princess and the Wookie to my ship." Organa was valuable in Rebel secrets. Might as well kill two birds with one stone.

Calrissian was quickly protesting. "You said they'd be left in the city under my supervision!"

_He never gives up, does he? _Vader was growing increasingly tired of the obstinate man.

"I am altering the deal; pray I don't alter it any further." And with that, he turned his back on the scene behind him. It was unimportant. What awaited him was a far more important and interesting event.

_It is time to come home, Luke. Your destiny awaits._

**To Be Continued….**

_Well, guys, you must forgive me. I've been trying to catch up with summer reading, been reading Shadows of the Empire and spending time with family. Last week my aunt took me out to get a pedicure. Thus, I bring you this very important note (not in italics, as it's easier to type without them in word):_

CONTEST!

That's right, ladies and gents. Now, from being randomly messaged or e-mailed, and according to my stats on ff dot net I am given to understand that the fan base for this fic is pretty large. (The question would be why, but I like getting a big head) So, I came up with this idea: Last week, I almost considered having my toe nails painted black and having W A I G T painted in white on the nails. It translates to Where Am I Going To, but I figure you already know that.

So, the contest. You have to write these letters somewhere on your body, and the most original or artistic one wins! The rules being 1. Women cannot do breasts. 2. Men cannot to groins. 3. No one can do arses. 4. Doctored images are not allowed. 5. Only one entry per person. 6. No stealing other people's entries.

All entries must be in by August 25. The winner will receive a custom made script format scene with the characters from the story thanking them for playing. And my autograph. With such crappy prizes, no one is going to enter, but I just think this is a fun idea. Maybe it isn't. Maybe I'm way too full of myself (oh, that's so likely.) Entries will be posted on my website, which is under construction, once it's completed. Until then, they will be posted on my deviant account, and the link for that is on my user page here.

So, send in all entries to the e-mail address that is also on my user page here, and I look foreword to hearing from you! (Why do I have the feeling this will never work?)

Now, for reviews!

Denique: Thank you!

cookiemunster : -snork- I love you. I got something like that in a chain e-mail. It's really funny, and if you give me your address, I could send it to you. I think you might like it. Good job with your own story, by the way. I agree on the country western band. As for the monkeys…..restraining orders are my friend…..

Healing Hands: Oh, thank you so much! And a God bless to you, too!

Insane Pineapple from Naboo: Well, I tried to make him seem like enough of a jackass so that you don't feel _too _sorry for him.

East Coast Ryder: That gets explained right after Bespin. When I wrote it, it made perfect sense to me, and everyone was like, "Wait, the hell?" So, I'm going to put out the extra effort to make it more understandable.

Dianasis: Oh, thank you very much! I feel the same way about the characters, but I'm glad you like it.

Schnickledooger: Jeeze…if you can sum it up that quickly…why do I bother to write all this crap? Forgiven, of course.

TorontoBatFan: Well, it is mentioned in the previous chapter that Luke has had many failed suicide attempts. I'm going to write two sidelines about them eventually, but I'm lazy. So, dead on about the secret death wish. And I must say, I loved that family business line. It made me crack up. As to whether the battle follows the same plot of the movie, I can't say.


	34. Part 2 Chapter 12

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Twelve**

Something felt very wrong about this.

Lost in Cloud City, Luke had done everything in his power to try and free Leia, but to no avail, and he was marooned in a strange, dark anteroom, highly confused. Behind him, the giant metal door clanged shut, and he wheeled, startled, as the sound echoed.

Something felt very, _very _wrong about this.

Every emotion through the Force was telling him to get out of there, but he was heedless. There was no way out, at least, not the way he came in, and in the present situation, he had not choice but to go foreword. Carefully looking around, he stopped for a moment, only to suddenly find the platform lifting him up, despite any protest he might have formulated.

_I have a bad feeling about this…._

"The Force is with you, my son."

Luke wheeled, sucking in a sudden breath whilst steam billowed and pushed around the stair case. Vader – his sire, but not his father. That title belonged to the man he'd murdered. It belonged to Obi-Wan.

"But you are not a Jedi yet."

Intense adrenaline pumped through every vein, heightened every nerve as he walked up those stairs to meet his enemy, igniting his lightsaber. Well, yes, a Jedi used the Force for defense, and true, it seemed he'd have to make the first move, but surely even Master Yoda could understand that! Surely even the Jedi Master could understand the righteous indignation, the hatred, the hurt that forced him onward.

Something in him strongly contested that.

_Slash, flash!_

Aggressively, Luke drove his father back, putting Vader on the defensive. The Force reminded him that he was far from winning, and to get cocky now would spell doom for him. Panting, he paused, backing slowly up to regain breath.

"You have learned much, my son."

Luke inwardly snarled, hating the superior note in his voice. "Don't you _dare_ be proud of me!"

In two quick moves, Vader had hooked Luke's saber, sending it flying. Luke had to roll to avoid being hit, snatching his lightsaber just in time to dodge the heavy form of his father bearing down on him.

"Your destiny lies with me, my son. Obi-Wan knew this to be true."

Anger flooded him, and he swiped back at the other man. "No!"

Suddenly, his balance was gone, he was falling into….a chamber of some sort.

_Where am I?_

Everything in him screamed to get out of there now, and with a Force induced push, he quickly leapt out, clinging to the pipes. He quickly jumped down, separated from his father by the pit of steaming liquid metal.

"Impressive…." That same note in his voice, the single proof of praise, the note Luke had prayed for as a child.

_Don't think about that now._

"Most impressive. Obi-Wan has taught you well."

"No thanks to you."

Vader didn't seem to notice that. "Now, release your anger."

Anger? Yes, the anger was there, it was so easily accessible. A little push, and he'd have all the power he could ever-

No. He'd worked too hard, struggled too long to fall back now. He had scars, he had nightmares, he'd lost everything there was to lose, and still he would not turn to the Dark Side.

Luke retreated as his father advanced around the acrid smelling pit, goading him on. "Only your hatred can destroy me."

_Don't listen…._

They briefly exchanged attacks before Luke leapt into the air, doing a somersault to land behind his father, kicking him into the pit below. Exhausted, he looked down, and saw no sign of him.

_It's not over yet._

He cautiously turned his saber off, still gripping it, and quickly went down the stairs and through a brightly lit tunnel. He exited, looking around cautiously. Well, it didn't look like-

_Thwack!_

With a thud, Luke was struck from behind by a heavy object, crying out in brief pain. Turning, he found his father, directing even more bulky objects at him. Two could play at that game, and Luke quickly raised his hand, trying to focus. His Force barrier may be crude, but it was keeping most of the objects away from him. But the more that got through put him in more pain, made him lose even more focus. Finally, something shattered the window, and the corridor began to depressurize. Despite his desperate attempt to grab onto anything that could hold, he went flying, glass shards cutting at his flesh.

His grip on the gantry was precarious, and Luke had to attach his lightsaber – his _father's _lightsaber – to his belt and scramble up for all he was worth. Once up, he grabbed his weapon again, moving cautiously through the control room.

_Crash!_

His father brought his saber down, and Luke blocked, sparks flying. Panting, exhausted, he was forced back onto the catwalk, tripping and falling backward. He gulped, his father's pulsing red blade pointing straight at him.

_Well, here's a situation I thought never to be in._

"You are beaten. It is useless to resist."

Luke shook his head, desperate. "I'm not giving up."

"Don't let yourself be destroyed as Obi-Wan did."

Every instinct in him screamed at that moment, and he rolled, jumped to his feet, and slashed at his father's arm, striking his shoulder. "_No_! You did it! You took him from me! My master, my _savior_! How did you _ever _call yourself my father?" Luke had retreated down the catwalk during this tirade. He managed to get around the instrument complex just before his father swiped at it, making his precarious hold on the very tip of the catwalk even worse. Trying to keep his mind on several things at once, Luke was helpless to stop his father's finishing blow.

The lightsaber swiped through his wrist, almost sending him to his knees in blinding pain as he screamed.

_Dagobah….that vision. Oh, Force, why couldn't I listen to you, Master Obi-Wan?_

But true to his word, there was no trace of his beloved master to be found in the Force around him now, and he found himself crawling backward, staring at the bloodied stump of his arm. Cauterized, he was no longer bleeding, the wound smoking slightly as he stared at it in abject horror. It only vaguely struck him that he was now without a weapon, as well as that he had no hand to use it with.

And suddenly, from his father he sensed…..regret! Fear, even! It abruptly occurred to him the reason behind why his father flat out refused to ever duel with him, even if it was in practice. He was _afraid_! Afraid of a Skywalker civil war, of fighting the person he cared about, as he once had Obi-Wan and all the Jedi. Afraid of being forced into the position of destroying that which he loved most, and it struck Luke as so extraordinary…..

Luke had to back away in abject horror, his feet instinctively keeping him safe. Finally, he came to wrap his more or less uninjured arm around the pole, his feet firmly planted on the thin rings.

"There is no escape."

_No escape…._ It echoed in his shocked brain.

"Don't make me destroy you." Luke didn't doubt that he would. "You are young, and your experience in the Force is great. You were _born _to be a part of the Dark Side, it is your destiny. Heir to the throne, you shall be king."

"I…I don't want to be the emperor…."

"There is no choice. Come to me, Luke," the deep voice almost…pleaded? "I shall complete your training."

"I'll never join you!" Luke cried. "I've fought too hard to turn back now. I won't join the man that killed my master!"

He could feel the building frustration from his father, but paid it little mind. "Obi-Wan never told you what happened when your mother gave you up."

Luke blinked. What did that have to do with anything? Was he trying to tell him the truth now, after it was far too late? He'd had his chance, he never took it. "He told me enough," the young man hissed. "He told me you took me from her."

"No. Obi-Wan kidnapped you." The news so shocked the no longer breathing Luke as to illicit the ultimate response.

He stumbled.

Luke Skywalker, who had perfect balance, who never fell, stumbled.

His knees buckling, Luke was only just able to grab the post again. "Wh-what?"

"The Jedi were angry that they had lost, and thought to kidnap you as a tool for revenge against me. It failed, up until now."

Luke still couldn't breath, tears beginning to flow. Obi-Wan had _lied _to him? After promising he was saving him from his father's tyranny, he'd _lied _to him? "You wail quite gustily that the Sith always lied to you, gave you no choice in your life profession, but do you honestly believe," he father was continuing, "that the Jedi would have done anything less? They would have lied to you, kept you hidden away on some tenth rate planet, and _force _you to become a Jedi. You can break their oppression, Luke." He was suddenly offering his hand again, and Luke stared at it, in shock. "You can _choose _to be a Sith."

So tempting….so much power, peace….He could save the galaxy with that power….

"You never saved me from my nightmares….Obi-Wan would do that…." He muttered.

Vader blinked. What was he talking about? "What?"

Something inside of him said that even if he had been forced to be a Sith, he had _chosen_ to jump ship and become a Jedi.

Luke's eyes widened, and he stared at his father. Slowly, he shook his head.

And he let go of the pole.

**To Be Continued….**

_Updates on the contest: There are three days left. I have two entries. If I do not have a minimum of three entries by the 25th, I will extend the deadline another month (I knew this thing would never work) If I still don't have three entries, then the thing gets canceled, so nobody gets any prizes. Doesn't that make you sad? It makes me sad. COME ON PEOPLE! It's not that hard! Please? Do it for me? Pllleeease? Also, happy National Punctuation Day!_

East Coast Ryder: Should be explained either the next chapter, or the one after that.

PrincessSkywalkerOrgana: Indeed he is!

Stephanie C: Yeah, I liked that chapter

Myotismon13: I don't know about anyone else, but I think I changed the whole "Luke I am your father," bit rather successfully.

cookiemunster: Well, yes, in a very non-lesbian way. Door doesn't swing that way.

denique: I doubt Vader will change sides soon, if ever. As for Mara, I stick by what I said: Not until the end, folks.

Stefanie2: I will write a sideline on where Mara went, but not until after the entire series is finished. It would have too many spoilers. Once the series ends, however, I will still be working on sidelines for it, I doubt I'll ever stop doing that, and, if it gets big enough, might buy it its own domain name and stuff. Sell t-shirts. That kinda thing.

Healing Hands: Thank you!

TorontoBatFan: I would have to agree one hundred percent about Luke's suicide attempts. Facing true death in the eye is very different from contemplating sucking on your lightsaber.

jamy skywalker: Here you go!

ALL OF YOU! ENTER THE CONTEST!


	35. Part 2 Chapter 13

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Thirteen**

How had it come to this?

Beaten, bleeding, he was barely hanging onto the antenna, dangling from Cloud City. Oh, how the mighty had fallen. The powerful Sith to the courageous Jedi, to the beaten little whelp, hanging, hanging, hanging….

_Master Obi-Wan, God, please, help me!_

No response. An annoying voice inside laughed at him, cried out, "They warned you, they warned you, they warned you…." Maybe he wasn't a Jedi. Not if he was too proud to listen to his mentors.

_You can't let me die like a dog here!_

It struck him very suddenly that….he did not want to die. There were so many things he had to do first. All the times he'd cut at his wrists, or pressed his off lightsaber to his chest, certain that this time, he would do it….And all those times the Force had reached out and healed the bleeding flesh, and calmed and soothed, and in the end, made him clip the lightsaber back to his belt…

He didn't want to die.

But if he was going to, there was still one person he wanted to know that he loved them, and maybe, just maybe, _she _could hear him.

_Leia…._

A reaction. A glittering awakening, and he was briefly blinded with some strange light that had too long slumbered. Was Leia Force sensitive? No…no, the light had passed. But she was still there, and he had her attention.

_Hear me…._

Was it hours or years he hung there, hoping the message would be understood? Either way, he still could not feel relief when the Millennium Falcon passed under him, the top hatch slowly opening. Wait a second, who the hell was that guy? Where was Han? Leia! He panicked, but something – the Force, desperation – calmed him, and he finally dropped into the waiting arms and was pulled back into the ship. Somehow a blanket was tossed around his shoulders, and he was lead hobbling towards the cockpit.

"Luke!"

He winced in pain as Leia rushed to him, throwing her arms around him. Her shoulders shook slightly, as though she had been crying, and she gently pulled away, stroking back his matted hair, whispering words of comfort over his wounds. She paused in brief horror at his hand, but quickly lead him back to a bunk, finding a brace for the arm and slathering his wounds with bacta. She convinced him to take some sleeping pills, if only to briefly put him out of his misery. He merely lay there in agony, wincing as she worked, occasionally muttering deliriously.

"Obi-Wan….no, he couldn't have…."

"Hush," Leia whispered, watching him carefully, asking no question.

"It can't be true….Father…."

She blinked, surprised. "You…you fought your father."

He didn't answer, but instead asked, "Where's Han?"

Pain filled her features. "L-Later….I'll tell you later."

"Leia, where is he? What happened? Are you safe?"

She gave a forced laugh. "You're missing your hand, and you're worrying over me."

"I…." He was stopped by a sudden jolt of the ship as it was attacked, and winced in agony.

He'd wanted to tell her he loved her. Because he felt like he was dying, still. Just incase….

She brushed his hair back, kissing his forehead, and he sighed. "I'll be back." She rushed off to the cockpit, leaving Luke to sink into the thin mattress, wallowing in pain and self-pity.

_Luke…._

Gasping, he pushed himself up onto one arm, eyes wide. He hadn't heard his father inside his mind since the Death Star….when he'd murdered Obi-Wan….But if Obi-Wan really had kidnapped him….

"Father…." His voice broke, in some ways almost ready and waiting for whatever he would ask of him. to me….

Luke sank slightly, suddenly remembering all the questions he'd asked, now wondering if he really wanted them answered….

_It is your destiny._

He sank all the way back, the medication taking hold. "Obi-Wan….tell me it's not true….."

So tired….so much pain…..His father's voice could no longer reach him, he was left by himself. He hated himself.

_Where am I going to?_

…

It was dark, all dark. And then, suddenly, a bright flash, and then just a tiny little flicker of light. Darkness, everywhere, but that light… He ran desperately to reach it, feeling as though he were moving through thick mud. He had to reach it…he must…For his sanity, for his safety….

_"I want to be a Jedi, _Master _Obi-Wan."_

_Obi-Wan…._

Was his savior still his savior, and was he still the one bearing the light?

Finally, the light grew close enough to touch, which he did, and it flickered slightly, blinding him for a moment. And when he could see again, in the darkness he saw…..

Himself.

A bruised and battered young man – the very mirror image of Luke – was staring at him with so much pain in his eyes.

Waking, he would have understood nothing. Asleep, it all dawned on him instantaneously.

"You…." He whispered to his clone. "You're where I was getting those emotions from, the day that the Storm Troopers killed….those people…on Tatooine."

The young man straightened slightly, blinked. "Yes, they were our aunt and uncle. Owen and Beru Lars."

Luke began to hyperventilate slightly. "Those visions….all from you….I…." Tears began to spring to his eyes, his knees buckled slightly. "I was supposed to be you….I was supposed to be you!" He now collapsed, shaking. He never should have been born, and never should have lived like this. All this pain….One small mistake in the timeline, and the Force was trying desperately to put him on the right track.

"Is…Is Darth Vader really my father?"

Luke paused, swallowed. "Yes, he really is."

The young man collapsed slightly, shaking his head. "Ben, why didn't you tell me…." Ben. They'd called Obi-Wan that on Tatooine.

_Obi-Wan…._

"I'm worthless…." Luke whispered, as the young man slowly reached down in pity, putting a hand on his shoulder. "I was never supposed to be like this…..I am hopeless….. I am destined to be the emperor….Oh, Force, I was only fooling myself all along."

"No," the other boy – the person he was supposed to have been – denied. "No, the Force guides us, but we choose our own destiny. We choose where we are going to."

Luke blinked, but shook his head. "No, I'm doomed, I can't do it. Not if Obi-Wan lied to me, not if he really….I am forever marooned in the Dark…."

The boy straightened, seemed to glow suddenly from some inexplicable light from within, some utter purity that Luke had never had, and he watched him, transfixed. "The power of darkness is a fragile one. A single candle in the night destroys it."

Luke slowly crawled to his feet, still watching the glowing figure. Hope was not lost. He would right this wrong, if it took him his entire life. And maybe strangest of all were two things….One was that he didn't care if Obi-Wan had stolen him from his mother, he found he loved him, in spite of himself. And his father….he didn't hate him, anymore, either.

Obi-Wan was not lost to him. His savior still lived.

_I will follow you anyplace._

"Unrevealed until its season…."

Soft music, wrapped around him, lead him away from the shinning light. But, no….The light was inside of himself….And the voice, he knew. It was not his mother, and neither was it Obi-Wan. It was coming to take him home.

_Leia…._

"Something fate alone can see…."

…

Luke opened his eyes, blinking with new clarity. Startled for a moment, Leia – who was hovering over him – did not move, stopping her singing.

"Where did you hear that song?" he croaked.

Leia paused. "Um….my mother used to sing it to me when I was little…."

Luke smiled weakly. "Mine did, too." Leia smiled back, stroking back his hair. It was a very popular, very old lullaby.

"Are you feeling better now?" He nodded. "Good. Artoo fixed the hyper drive, and we commed _The Redemption_, told them about your….about your hand…." No pain. He felt no pain. How extraordinary. "We're going to rendezvous with them and some more of the fleet. From there, Lando and Chewie are going to take the _Falcon_ and start looking for Han."

"Where is Han?"

Leia winced. "It's a long story, I'll explain it when you're feeling better."

"I'm feeling fine. I am….at peace…." To himself, he muttered, "So this is what the Light Side feels like." It was wonderful. "Stay with me for a while?" he asked her, placing his only remaining hand over hers. "Talk with me?"

"Of course I will," she smiled patiently. "Of course."

"I….I don't suppose you could….sing for me, could you? I love that lullaby."

She sighed, but agreed. "In the bulb there is a flower/ in the seed an apple tree….."

**To Be Continued….**

_Okay, so, hopefully that explained Tatooine. It always made perfect sense to me that Dark!Luke was getting his visions from Real!Luke, but nobody else caught on. If you'rse still confused, then e-mail me._

_Well, I got a job. Yup, I am now a sales associate person thing at "Silk Cocoon," so there's another chunk of time gone once school starts. But never fear. I will never let this fic flop, I love you all too much. I only have one more piece of ESB to get through, and then I'm going through my reasonably different version of events for Shadows of the Empire. Hope you all enjoy!_

East Coast Ryder: Thanks! I thought it would really work well

Snowgurl54: Thank you, will do

denique: -laugh- Well, I'm glad you're my fan, despite my evilness.

Stephanie C: What happened with Padmè gets explained during Return of the Jedi, and a slightly altered version of Revenge of the Sith will be featured very, very soon. As for if Vader's lying or not…..you'll have to wait and see.

Katey of Maychoria: Well, thank you very much!

Myotismon13: - bows –

Stefanie2: Thanks, I really tried with that one.

jamy skywalker: That's like the fifth person who's said Luke should go with his father. Poor guy, he gets no sympathy XD!

darth mojo the spork: ooohhh…Thank you! I love it when people do that!

Asato-Chan: And that's the sixth person

xInuyashaxangelx: Well, you're awesome yourself!

PrincessSkywalkerOrgana: I needed a bit of a humor break. Next chapter's somewhat depressing, too. At least for Lukie it is.


	36. Part 2 Chapter 14

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Fourteen**

She was staring off into space, the glittering galaxy so close, shinning, shinning, shinning. Splitting the darkness. No darkness could conquer such bright and awesome glory. That was what he was thinking as he delicately wrapped an arm – now with a new hand – around her shoulder. She wasn't thinking anything like that. She was just watching the ship disappear into it.

_Han…._

Gone. Would she, could she get him back? Did he love her? He'd never said he did.

But Luke had, and it was this very thing – this love of his – that he was determined to either let live or die once and for all.

"Leia?" he asked her calmly, brushing away a rebellious strand of her silky brown hair. "I….I really need to talk with you."

Leia's insides froze up. "Yes…" she whispered absent mindedly. With Luke in perfect health, she could no longer distract herself over his wounds, leaving her to wallow in the shell of misery that lived without knowing where the man she loved was. "Yes, we do need to talk."

Luke took a deep breath, just watched her. His heart was hammering in his chest. She was so beautiful, and so perfect, and so…. "I-"

"Let me go first," she insisted, now whirling to face him, gently shrugging off his arm.

He blinked, surprised. "Of course."

"I know you're still in love with me."

"Well, I-"

"And that's why I think you need to go far away. Or I need to go far away." Her hands flew to her face as she paced, shaking. "Oh, somebody does. But I don't know what's up or down or anything anymore."

Stunned, Luke just watched her wear a hole in the ship floor, staring, slack jawed. "Away?" he finally whispered hoarsely.

"It's because I don't want to hurt you," she explained, seizing his hands in hers, turning to face him. "And I know I will. I know I am. But I just can't….I told you I'd try, I'd give it serious thought, falling in love with you. It's been almost three years, and I can't, I just can't! I'm so sorry, Luke, please forgive me." She leaned her head onto his shoulder and began to cry. He made no move to comfort her, feeling as though something was kicking his insides out. "I am so, so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you, I never, ever did. I do care about you, but I….I tried to deny it so strongly, but I _am _in love with Han, I know that now."

Han. Somehow, he always ended up on top, didn't he? Luke could feel cold, heavy tentacles of the Dark Side begin to try and wrap around him, and he rebuffed them with renewed ferocity.

"And it's only going to hurt you more if we're anywhere near each other." She pulled away now, and Luke continued to just stare. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I…I think I'll just go now, somewhere, anywhere. I…." She tried to think of something to say, but just shook her head.

She walked across the room. Away from him. She was leaving.

Luke blinked, trying to understand.

She was leaving….

_You can't!_

"No," he whispered hoarsely, still not moving. "No, you can't…." She didn't hear him. He lunged foreword all at once, still meters away from her, crying out desperately. "_Stop_!" She stopped, turned, waited breathlessly. He shivered, mouthed soundless words like a fish. What was going on? He felt like something inside of him had just shattered into a thousand pieces. But all he knew were the words, "Keep her, keep her, keep her," pounding through his brain, and he knew, he _knew_ he could not let her leave him all alone.

He took a few steps towards her, and then stopped. He tried to start again, but thought better of it. "Please don't go away." Was he crying? That must be it. "Please? No one's ever….they never…" He paused, swallowed, tried again. "No one's ever just accepted me the way you have. They've always put me on a pedestal, or demanded even more – maybe more than I can give – or they haven't given a damn about whether I've lived or died but you do. You hold no standards, you…." He struggled for the right words. "You are _patient _with me. I don't understand it, I don't have to. All I know is that I've loved you right from the start."

"Luke, please, I-"

"And if you leave…..If you leave….I just…." What? "I….I feel better around you, I do, I….Look….I remember my mother, and so many other things, so many pleasant things. I remember, I do. It's there, I know it is, because when I look at you….." His blue eyes met her brown ones, and he knew that he could not let her leave. "I can feel it. And I….I look at you and…"

They simultaneously took a few steps closer to each other, just within reaching distance, but they did not reach out, and they moved no further than that. "I'm home," he sobbed, putting his face in his hand for a moment to control his emotions. "Please. I don't want that feeling to go away. I don't want to forget."

She hesitated toward him for a moment, but decided better. "I can never love you the way you want me to."

He chocked down his tears, shaking his head. "I don't care. Han can have you, he can, you can give him all your love. It doesn't matter. Just don't send me away, _please_, Leia, don't leave me alone again. Everyone always leaves me, and I'm just stuck here, alone and…and I…."

They fell into each other's embrace, holding tightly, never letting go. Home, yes, they were. They _were _home. "You can love Han," he cried in a whisper. "You can, I still love you, I can never _stop_ loving you. I can't. I tried so hard….Don't leave me alone."

"I won't," she soothed, stroking his hair.

"Say you still care about me."

"I always will."

"Then that's enough."

He would make it enough.

…

Luke stood, shoulders heaving with the exertion of his angry breath, smoking blaster in hand. The attacker lay dead a foot or so away from him, ceasing to twitch from its final moments of agony. Lando, Chewie, Leia, they all just stared at him for a moment, breathless. Luke's left eye twitched spasmodically for a moment before he stared disgustedly at the crude weapon in his hand before tossing it away, revolted.

It had been six months since Luke's fight on Bespin, and he was now twenty one, a fully grown adult. And that was the third assassin this month.

"That's _it_!" The three males ducked in terror at the rage of the female companion, storming past Luke and towards the base computer library. "Enough of this, I'm sick and tired of it. I'm finding out who is at the bottom of this, or…or so help me, I'll-"

"Leia!" Luke pleaded, leaping gracefully over the body of the fallen and chasing after her. "Leia, please, don't do this."

"Forget it, Luke, there's nothing you could say to get me to change my mind."

Luke paused, nearly running into a rather confused secretary, whose eyes followed them down the hall. "Leia, honestly, it's just a few assassination attempts, I can handle it!"

"You had your chance."

"Leia."

"No!"

"Oh, come on, I'm a big kid!" He finally came to a skidding halt as she plunked down a computer, Lando sliding into a seat next to her. Chewie stood behind Luke, cocking his head and giving a rumble-y estimate of what he thought of the situation.

"Good point, Chewie," agreed Lando, but Luke didn't pay them any attention.

"Really," he argued. "I've survived assassination attempts since I was seven, this is no big deal!" Lando opened his mouth, but Luke quickly cut him off with a, "Not one word, Lando."

"Whatever you say."

"Luke," Leia reprimanded harshly, swiveling around in her chair, "I am not going to sit back and do nothing while these…these…_criminals_ infiltrate the base, murder guards, and proceed to either murder you or possibly gather sensitive information about the rebellion. Now, you can either sit down, shut up, and thank me for trying to save your hide, or you can-"

"Now, just a minute! I've already proven I'm more than capable of taking care of myself."

"Well-"

"Shut up, Lando."

He sighed. "Never mind, then."

"Leia?" Luke pleaded for a final time. She pursed her lips and glared at him, and he threw his hands into the air. Damn, impossible woman! Let's just see Han cope with one of _her _obstinate moods. Oh, maybe he was just escaping a bad divorce on this one.

But then, he doubted that.

"Fine, have it your way! I give up!" He then slammed gloomily into a chair, which is where Wes found him only a few seconds later.

"Hey, Luke, can you-"

"Go to hell, Wes."

"Okay…" he backed off. "Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed." But then, he wasn't about to tempt fate and rile Luke up anymore than he already obviously was.

"Bad day," explained Lando, and Chewie nodded.

Wes shook his head, sighing. "Never mind, I'll go ask Tycho."

It was always a bad day when those two argued. "Jeeze, Chewie," Lando muttered. "You'd almost think they were siblings!"

**To Be Continued….**

_Well, that's that for ESB, but Part Two – also known as Part Insanely Long – still isn't over yet. On to an actually altered version of Shadows of the Empire! That's right, I'm not being "lazy," and am actually doing a slightly altered version of events! Also, I would like to remind you all about the contest I announced a few chapters back. I only got two entries, and I need at least three. So, I'm extending the deadline to the 25th of September, so GET THOSE ENTRIES IN! If I don't get at least three entries, the whole thing is void, and no one gets a prize. And that wouldn't be fun, would it? So, go ahead!_

HermioneSkywalker: Actually, apart from like a grand total of half an episode, I've never watched Charmed, nor know much of anything about it. Sorry. Thanks for the complement, though

xInuyashaxangelx: well, if you need me to explain it more, you can e-mail me. I love getting e-mail! Now, who said anything about Luke and Leia being related? Is there any evidence to suggest that? No, or is there? MUAHAHAH!

Stephanie C: Yup Lil' Lukie's obtained inner peace. –waves flag-

darth mojo the spork: Thanks! If you have any questions, just send an e-mail

East Coast Ryder: Well, school doesn't start till Wednesday, so we'll see -.

Shi Feng Huang: Awwww. I made you cry? I like doing that. Not like going over to a kid and punching them till they cry, I like having brought someone past that emotional cusp. Thank you!

denique: Wow! High praise indeed.

PrincessSkywalkerOrgana: Why the sad smilie? I'm sorry –patpat-


	37. Part 2 Chapter 15

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Fifteen**

"Luke, honestly, move out of the doorway."

He was glaring at her. Literally glaring at the woman he adored. Didn't matter. She was infuriating, she wasn't listening to his plaintive pleas, and if this was the only way to protect her, he'd do it.

"Leia, please," he begged, "don't do this."

"I'm a big girl, I can handle myself." She now tried to brush past him and to the hanger bed. "I've got to protect you from-"

"No!" he cried, grabbing her by her shoulders and swinging her around to face him, surprised. "No, I've got to protect you!" His face softened slightly, and he shook his head. "You simply _cannot _go chasing after Black Sun," he whispered. "Anyone who's ever done that has never lived to talk about it. I'm not going to let that happen to you."

She gulped for a second, glared, and then ripped herself from him, turning to walk through the ship dock. He stared at her back, flabbergasted, and glanced at Chewie, who was standing by the small ship he'd be piloting to take her to Coruscant. He shook his head and shrugged as a multitude of fighter pilots watched the scene silently. Luke finally growled, clenching a fist. "I was the Imperial Prince, you've got to believe me!"

Leia froze and turned, stunned. Indeed, there was a collective gasp as the unmentionable was mentioned. Luke cast a contemptuous glance at the people staring before focusing back in on the girl. "If anyone's going to know about Xizor, it's going to be me. He…." He stopped. Xizor had…he was….Luke shuddered. He'd never really done anything, had he? It was strange, Luke really couldn't remember….

Sighing, Leia walked back to him, taking his hand. "I promise you, I will come back. I can handle Xizor."

"No one can handle Xizor," Luke denied. "Palpatine's only fooling himself. Why, my father-"

"You're father?" Leia blinked, surprised. Luke hadn't mentioned him in ages, hadn't called him by the name father for well over two years. Was this far more serious than she thought?"

"He tried to choke him once," Luke continued, sort of staring off into space. "He didn't finish, obviously. And Xizor would do the same if he could. _If _he could." He now stared at Leia hard, demandingly. "And you he could do much worse to."

Leia sighed, pushed a lock of hair from his eyes. "You need a sabbatical. Maybe you should go to Tatooine for a while, study there."

"I hate Tatooine," he shook his head. "Besides, I have business in the Core."

Now Leia's eyes widened. "Are you crazy? They'll spot you in no time!"

"I'll lie low," Luke insisted.

"Luke, don't go to the Core."

"Then don't go to Coruscant."

She opened her mouth to protest only to stop herself. He meant it passionately. Well, she wasn't about to back down, and neither was he. "I've got to go. This is important."

"And so is my thing. With any luck, we'll both be alive afterwards to see each other again."

Leia smiled weakly. "I thought you didn't believe in luck."

Obi-Wan didn't believe in luck. Luke didn't believe in luck. Simple as that. "Nope," he shook his head. "I don't."

She kissed his cheek, said goodbye, and turned around. Nor did she look back, even while Luke's eyes followed the ship for as far as he could.

…

She was….and…so….

Xizor sat staring at the hologram for a very long time. Princess Leia Organa. The last of a breed. There would be no more Alderaanian princesses. Neither would there be any other of Xizor's own line.

And in both instances it was Vader's fault. How extraordinary.

_Destiny takes a hand. _

She was perfect. Well educated, beautiful, smart, and obviously with enough guts to seek out the very head of Black Sun. She was supposed to be a close cohort to Skywalker. If that were the case, then how on earth did she come to be on Coruscant? Surely that annoying pest Skywalker would have warned her soundly of the dangers inherent in Black Sun. He'd known, and even used, some of them his whole life before turning Jedi. A smile tugged at the Falleen's lips momentarily. Skywalker had always been thoroughly terrified of him. And with good reason. He'd subtly threatened and surreptitiously accosted that boy from when he'd met him at the age of nine to when he'd never seen him again in person at the age of eighteen. Wasn't Skywalker's fault, really. It was all aimed at Vader, always at Vader. Of course, he hadn't been very careful about it that first time, and he'd won Vader's gloved mechanical hands wrapped around his throat because of it. He hadn't counted on their Force Bond. The child was only nine, for the Force's sake. He shouldn't have had that much power yet.

Blasted little Imperial Prince. But he wasn't anymore. And there were no more heirs to the Empire. Legally, when Palpatine was no longer useful and died, and when he finally took out that bastard Vader…..

His, all his. But he wasn't thinking about that tonight. Instead, he was dreaming of a human girl with long brown hair, and a flash in her chocolate eyes that intrigued him and called him…. No other girl in the galaxy like her existed. He loved one of a kind things, such as himself. And then there was Guri, who was well worth every single credit spent, and then some. But Leia wasn't like Guri. Leia was warm and alive and no phantom to fade in the air.

_I must have her._

It wouldn't prove a challenge, of course. Nothing did. Life was dull, and so he sat on a powder keg, almost welcoming the threat of a spark. That was what his game with Vader was – a dance with death. But he would cheat, and death would lose. It was unavoidable.

She wouldn't be able to resist him once he put out his full pheromone arsenal. No woman could. He wanted an equal, a partner, if only temporary. He wanted a spark. He wanted his passions to explode, and Leia Organa was just the sort of girl who could do it.

_You will be mine._

In the back of his head he heard a buzzing sound, and had he listened, he would have heard the familiar cadence of, "Skywalker, Skywalker, Skywalker." Skywalker should take number one priority. Only when his death was accomplished would Xizor most assuredly win the battle. And yet, somehow, despite every effort, that son of a bitch remained alive and well. The Empire had tried, and Xizor had sent no less than twelve assassins, all of them never to be heard from again. Dead – at the hand of that blasted Skywalker.

Could it be that this was the self same boy who, at the age of nine, had brought his father running with a mere mental word? Was Vader's pride and joy truly as powerful as claimed?  
No, no, he'd rather not think about that…..

He called in Guri, who watched him with that blank look of patient indifference. She lived but to do as he wished. How utterly boring for her. But she wasn't human, it didn't matter. But he was craving a little bit of human flesh.

He ignored the buzzing in the back of his skull. He focused on Leia instead.

"Princess Leia Organa has been smuggled onto Coruscant." No news to Guri. It was her job to know these things. "Apparently, she wants to see me. We will grant her the privilege." There was a slight spasm in Guri's face, a bit of a twitch. Didn't like it, did she? Well, too bad. He didn't feel like consulting her about his love life. Besides, this was probably only temporary. Everything always was.

But then….to make it permanent didn't sound half bad at the moment, either….A bit of a change from the usual wine and dine sort of deal.

_We'll have to wait and see._

"Have her smuggled in during the 1300 police shift change. You can kill or buy off whoever might see her, whichever you prefer. Naturally, a costume wouldn't hurt."

"Naturally."

He dismissed Guri to do her job, the rest was up to her. He said what he wanted, now she had to figure out a way to do it. If he'd wanted a star from the sky, it was Guri's job to figure out how to get it, and then go get it.

He turned in his chair and switched the holo back on.

_Princess Leia Organa….what a surprise you're in for._

…

Luke had picked a pretty much desolate moon hosting an abandoned Rebel outpost and parked himself there, his comrades from X-Wing standing guard. From there, he ordered everything he needed, barricaded himself in his room, and got to work.

His work? Watching holo after holo after holo. Whatever had survived the Fall of the Old Republic and the Jedi Purge. Granted, that wasn't much, and much of what he did find was meaningless and trivial.

"Artoo, pause it right there!" R2D2 did just that. "Now back it up just a couple frames…there….yes…Okay, that's good, stop! There….."

Luke was sitting cross-legged on the floor, entirely breathless. Behind him, the crystal for his lightsaber was finishing forming, and in front of him was something almost more important.

His master. And his father. Both sitting there, pensive, silent, very Jedi-like. Members of the Council, though his father had never made the rank of Master.

For most of the time he sat there, staring at the much younger picture of his beloved savior in the grainy holo. His eyes still held that look of infinite patience, but not that sadness yet…..no….not that sadness.

And his father! Pensive, brooding, angered about something.

_"Great fear I sense in you, great unrest. Same as your father, when brought before me, he was. A danger to the Jedi, I proclaimed, and still young Skywalker was trained. All too true…my words became…."_

His father, Anakin Skywalker. The danger to the Jedi. Shouldn't he have every reason to be happy? Wasn't he in love with a beautiful woman – or so he'd always said?

_Always so angry, Father?_

He would find out. He'd promised himself that.

**To Be Continued…**

_Not much to say this time, other than ENTER MY CONTEST! If I don't get one soon, I might withhold a chapter until I get at least one more. Might. It depends. That's about it, life's been busy, and it's only going to get busier. So, onward!_

HermioneSkywalker: I do admit to the Finding Nemo thing. On an unrelated topic, our local pet store sells clown fish. I'd get one, but I wouldn't want it and my five year old goldfish to fight or something…..

Stephanie C: Ah, but they're not. Or are they? Or not? MUAHAHA!

East Coast Ryder: o.O? Interesting picture…..

xInuyashaxangelx: Nope, sorry, not evidence. Just something for me to tease you with. However, there is at least two little bits of something that could be proof (or not) buried in past chapters. But maybe it's not proof, and I'm just screwing with you. You'll never know.

denique: It's gonna be pretty good, if somewhat short compared to Shadows of the Empire. Sorry, I don't have time to write the novel, and I don't want them to be insanely similar.

TorontoBatFan: Ah! I've been missing your reviews Anyway, yes to just about everything, except for Tatooine, he doesn't go. Oh, and Leia. Cause they're not related. Or are they? I've got to stop this – maniacal snicker -


	38. Part 2 Chapter 16

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Sixteen**

**A.N.: If you all read my sideline "Mistrust and Danger," the end of this chapter will make a whole lot more sense. So, sil vous plais?**

It was very hot. Hot, muggy, it clung to him, dampened his hair with sweat and made his thick black clothes uncomfortable.

Why was he wearing black?

Retrograde, he thought to himself. He went from wearing black to white to brown to black again. A brief moment of brightness that slowly darkened in shade.

But he didn't believe that. He'd found the Light Side of the Force, and nothing could tempt him otherwise.

He just wished he could find some light here. It was very dark here. There were brief spurts of faded scarlet light that danced in the air, like rubies in sunlight – a distorted vision of red. There was a dull rumbling as if the earth beneath his feat was at war with itself. It was around this time that Luke came fully into his vision.

"Anakin!"

His eyes snapped open and his head whipped around, looking for the voice. And there it was. The same faces from the holo before – his master and his father, at odds ends as Obi-Wan turned his lightsaber off in protest.

"Please, you've got to listen to me!"

But he wasn't listening. Even with his old Jedi blade, he was lunging for Obi-Wan, and Luke found himself standing at the end of the bridge they fought on. Just like his mysteriously reappeared black attire, so was his old lightsaber at his side. With a throaty cry of, "No!" bursting from his lips unbidden, he unclipped it, rushing foreword to stop his father.

_I will not watch you kill him twice!_

Of course, Luke was hapless to stop anything, as he rushed through his mentor as easily as a specter, his blade an equal phantasm. Before he had time to despair, however, the rumbling from before grew louder until it was a vast roar in his ears and the earth shook uncontrollably. The bridge rocked, and Anakin instinctively turned off his saber and clipped it to his belt, attempting to maintain his equilibrium as surely as Obi-Wan was. Luke, of course, had excellent balance. Just one of those things that happened, he guessed.

Before he had time to blink, however, Anakin went pitching over the railing, and Obi-Wan lunged after him with all the love and familiarity that he had raised that boy on since he was nine. "Anakin!"

Luke rushed to the side, not daring to reach out, but too afraid to stay back.. "Father, take his hand!"

Obi-Wan had managed to grab Anakin's belt, stopping him mid-decent and jerking him around so that his bionic hand grabbed the bar. Another tremor shook the earth, yanking Obi-Wan backward, Anakin's lightsaber going with him. For a brief moment he simply stared at it, trying to fight the mindset of shock as he clipped it to his own belt absentmindedly. He quickly went back to the rail, reaching out again. For the briefest instant, he saw the eyes of his pupil looking back, and that was why he reached desperately for him. "Come on, Anakin." Nothing. "You don't want to die like a dog here! Please, Anakin….not like this." His voice cracked, and the frame of mind of Vader returned. The Sith's only real hand swiped at the Jedi's, making it painfully clear he would rather die than admit to the mistake.

"I hate you!" he snarled, grappling uselessly for the bar.

"Father, you don't mean that," pleaded Luke, looking from Master to man. "Please, just do it. Do it and you and I walk away from here and none of this has to be real!"

But Obi-Wan took the hint, took Yoda's words to heart. There was no Anakin Skywalker. He was a memory of the boy he'd loved that could only fade over time. "You were my son, Anakin," he nearly sobbed, backing away. "I loved you."

"Where are you going?" Luke pleaded, not daring to take his hands off the bar. "You can't just…Master, please!"

Obi-Wan didn't hear him. Another tremor rocked the bridge, and the Jedi latched onto the railing, knees buckling. His former Padawan's grip, however, was lost, and he went falling down, down, down.

"No!" Luke screamed, paralyzed.

"Anakin!" Now Obi-Wan was beside him, focusing all of his energies in trying to protect the young man from the lava below. It was too little too late, and all he was able to do was to roll the burning mess of flesh and bone to the smoldering black stones on the bank of the lava river, Luke adding his own influences in the Force. For a moment, the boy stood there, staring. He turned his head only as Obi-Wan walked away, wondering if he should follow. Luke hesitated.

In an instant, he was off the bridge, rushing down the loose black rocks, stopping carefully at his father's side. "Oh, Force….Father….I….." He sensed only anger there, and it frightened him as nothing could. Carefully, he kneeled, wondering if his hands would simply go through like the spectral image they were. But, no, they stayed, gently lifting up the scared and blackened head. A leg was broken, his remaining arm and probably the other leg were so badly burned they'd have to be amputated.

"How did it come to this, Father?"

As gently as he'd cradled the skeleton on Tatooine, he held his father's head now, imparting whatever small mercies of the healing Force he could. What was going to happen? There was a noise. Luke looked up. A ship was landing, and Obi-Wan had had to dodge behind rocks, stalling his own take off. Couldn't risk being seen.

Luke's stomach twisted into a knot; Palpatine. He looked back down at his father – destined for a life of demeaning servitude. "Why did you call him?" No reply, of course. "Why couldn't you have taken Obi-Wan's hand? You must have done it several times before. Even _I _took his hand once, Father, you'll come to know that in another eighteen years…." For the briefest instant, the yellow-blue eyes of his father didn't look through him but at him, and both father and son's eyes widened slightly before Luke gave a small smile. "I'm here, Father. I'll always be here….."

And then it all faded into nothing. As if it had never really been at all.

…

"_Luke_!"

Luke was brought out of his trance by Wedge shouting in his ear. He shook his head, eye dilated as he regained his senses. He was hidden in the Rogue Squadron outpost. R2D2 was humming anxiously at him.

Asleep. That's all he'd been. But he'd seen visions through the Force in sleep, too. He wasn't about to be fooled.

"Jeezes, don't scare me like that!" Wedge pleaded, shaking his head. "I thought you were in a coma or something!"

"I'm fine," he grunted, struggling to his feet. "I'm fine. I was just…." He stared at the hologram he'd been watching before.

_Father…._

"I've got to know who he is…." He whispered, and Wedge gave him a funny look, blinking.

"What?"

Luke wheeled and seized his friend by his shoulders. "It's my destiny, I know it! All this time I've waited and now it's here!"

"What's here? Will you stop shaking me, you son of a-"

"My father! I've got to know who he is!"

Wedge managed to push the other man off, staring slack jawed at him. "You mean was."

"I mean _is_," he stressed weightily. "There's something there, somewhere, I know it, I've seen it so many times….I…." R2 was squealing again, and he looked down. "I've got to make my lightsaber," he muttered to himself.

"Okaaaay……" Wedge muttered, rubbing at his shoulders. Privately, he was thinking that Luke was having another mental breakdown. In truth, it was a rare moment of clarity. "When you're done with that, there's a message from Chewbacca on the holo, and he sounds hysterical."

Luke looked sharply up. "What's wrong?"

"Sorry, I don't speak Kashyyk. Lando's trying to calm him down. I think the latter of the two was muttering something like Leia and Xizor."

Luke, who had been turning to triple check that he had all the necessary parts for lightsaber construction, wheeled, shouting a furious, "_What_!"

Wedge shrank again, not liking his friend's insane behavior. "I'm not certain, it just sounded like-"

Luke tore out of the room, his comrade on his heels. "I told her not to go, damn it, I told her! And now she's there, and he's got her, and-"

Wedge snagged his shoulder, spinning him around. "For the love of the Force, Skywalker, will you please tell me what's going on!"

Luke's erratic breathing slowed, and he nodded. "When I was little….I couldn't have been more than nine…he…"

Wedge watched him carefully, not sure he liked where this was going. "He what?"

Luke shook his head, breathless. "I'm not sure." He could feel Wedge staring at him, and looked up. "Damn it, I don't remember!"

"What do you mean you don't remember?"

"Exactly what it sounds like! _I do not remember_. I pushed it way back into my psyche and hell if I'm dragging it out now. It was just something bad, I don't remember what. I was a kid, and….and I don't know." He broke from Wedge's hand, briefly walking towards the hanger again. "I've got to find her," he muttered. "I've got to protect her." He paused again while Wedge just watched him rant, slack jawed. "But first I've got to build my lightsaber."

"I'm going to go check with Lando…." Wedge muttered nervously, walking off.

Luke just stared at the wall, afraid. Afraid for Leia.

_If he's touched one hair on her head….I'll…._

Well, he'd do something, alright.

**To Be Continued…**

_There is one day left in the contest. Pleeeeease enter, because I really don't want to void the whole thing. Pretty please? Pweeeease?_

HermioneSkywalker: XD! That's nice.

xInuyashaxangelx: Agreed.

Stephanie C: Reasonably so. It's when he accidentally investigates his mother's past that every detail gets explained.

cookiemunster: XD! The "Bucket on his Head," line has forever been immortalized by me and my friend Charlene, who has to put up with all the crap I write. Feel special. Good luck with taking of LucasFilm.


	39. Part 2 Chapter 17

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Seventeen**

It really wasn't her fault. She'd never understood it, she didn't now, why all these guys insisted on locking her up, professing love or lust or whatever else they wanted from her. She'd never been pretty as a teenager. Her father had said differently, of course, but Bail Organa had doted on his adopted daughter with all the intense love a parent has. Leia missed him so much whenever she was unlucky enough or stupid enough to let her mind drift to Alderaan.

_Sure, they couldn't just date me when I was a teenager…they've got to abduct me from age eighteen to twenty one._

How could she have possibly gotten that much more attractive that Imperial men found it necessary to lock her up and try to throw away the key. Sending flowers would have done tons more to endear themselves to her.

_This seriously bites._

"I must insist you come and eat with me."

Leia didn't dare turn around to look at Xizor. He'd been standing there for some minutes, just watching her, and she had yet to look at him. She felt so…dirty around him. Oh, he'd failed, ultimately. Whatever trick it was he'd tried to get her into his bed had not succeeded, but she felt like she'd betrayed someone, Han especially, for her brief moment of weakness. Even now, the back of her mind considered it for a split second, but she had enough strength to shoot the idea down before it could take hold.

"I'm not hungry," she said in a monotone voice, staring out into the hustle and bustle of Coruscant. "Thank you." Luke hated Coruscant, he'd told her so.

_Luke…._

She was starving, in reality, and she could almost feel a tinge of disappointment. If Leia was a master at controlling her emotions, Xizor's had been dashed all to pieces. He didn't understand why or how she affected him the way she did, but there it was. She was his weak spot, this twenty one year old girl. She was only barely old enough to be called a woman, and he was many, _many _years her senior. Of course, he was a Falleen, he aged differently. He wasn't quite sure what the butterflies in his stomach were when he was around her, merely that he wanted to be closer. Maybe it wasn't even sexual, which was even more odd. He just wanted something from her, and to be able to give whatever it was she wanted back. He'd made the point of displaying his wealth, an attempt at showing her everything she could have once she had him.

"I can give you everything you could possibly want!" he'd argued in a rage with her a few hours before. He'd now returned far more level headed. "Why can't you just agree, I could make you very happy!"

"Because you could never, ever make me happy!" she'd replied with a cool sort of ferocity, and the Falleen had – of all things – backed down.

What did she want? He'd give it, if _he only knew what it was!_

What did Leia Organa want? She wanted out, for one. She wanted Han, for a second. And Luke….

Luke was a strange case. He could get her out of here, or would at least die trying. But she did not want him anywhere near the state of death. Not again. Not ever.

_Stay far away, Luke. Stay safe._

"Then may I invite you for the pleasure of your company?" he said with forced politeness through gritted teeth.

"Thank you very much for the offer," she replied – and yet she _would not look at him! Why _wouldn't she look at him? She still possessed all the etiquette of a princess when she wasn't arguing or being obnoxious, and all the tact of a senator. A tough case to crack, that girl. "But I have a slight headache. I'd rather stay in." They both knew quite well her only way in or out of that bedroom door was with him, and maybe then it would only lead straight to his own bedroom – but it was a change of scenery, and beggars couldn't be choosers. It didn't matter. Leia wasn't giving an inch of any sort of ground.

Xizor briefly wondered what his life would have been like had he ever been sensitive to that flighty substance known as the Force. Most certainly, he would have Vader as well as Skywalker beaten by now, he might even be ruling the galaxy. The Force had that wonderful ability of deceiving minds. He questioned if maybe it could trick a heart into loving. Oh, maybe it was a scam for the both of them, but at the moment, he would have taken whatever he could get.

_How, _he asked himself, _do I make her love me?_

How on earth could he simply just tell her he loved her when he'd never been in love before? And if he had, he'd long since forgotten it, so curled up and twisted and blackened with his schemes for revenge for thirteen long years. Thirteen years of toeing the line of niceties with Vader and all out viciousness.

"Would you like me to get you something?" he asked, knowing that she might have made up the headache. But, if she weren't, he could at least prove he was a provider. Not that he already hadn't.

"That's alright, you don't need to trouble yourself. It will pass."

"It's no trouble at all."

She turned – oh, Force, she turned! – and seemed to pierce right through him with those big, chocolate eyes. She had just beautiful eyes….

"No thank you."

He paused, faltered, tried to decide if he should charge or retreat. "Of course." He settled for neither for the moment, crossing his arms behind his back. "You know, Leia, I-"

There was a dull, rumbly boom, like a small explosion, and a slight tremor. Xizor could hear a distant alarm, and privately cursed ill timing.

"My prince!" Some guard came skidding to a halt at the door, which he'd left open – he was trying to create the illusion for her that she wasn't his prisoner, she was his guest. They both knew better. The man saluted, and Xizor merely glared at him in severe distaste and annoyance.

"Well, what is it?"

"Sir, there was a small time bomb set off, mostly for show, and not destruction. This wouldn't be an issue, my master, but it was a diversion to let _someone _into your palace!"

Xizor felt a slow, cold combination of dread and anger pour through him. "_What_?" he said slowly, wishing he was Force sensitive just so he could choke people without trying.

"Forgive me, my lord, we're shutting down all the levels and alerting security. Do you want me to-"

"I want you to get out and catch whoever it is!" He roughly seized the guard, his lizard-like claws leaving great bloody gashes as he tossed the man to the hall floor. "And make sure they didn't blow a hole in my palace!" He slammed the door with authority, boiling with rage.

"Having problems?"

He wheeled to see Leia, who had risen to her feet, stretching and watching him with amused contempt. He hated her. He hated her _because _he loved her, and he didn't understand it, and it wasn't fair, and…Some of his anger diffused into lust, and he could feel pheromones trying to build, his finger tips turning slight orange with the chemical change.

"Nothing I can't handle," he smoothed over, counting to ten in his head.

She shook her head. Well, if Luke hadn't listened to her silent plea to stay far away, he'd certainly get her out. And that was something, at least.

That blasted alarm was still blaring in the distance. Now Xizor had the headache.

"If there's a problem, we should probably go to my inner sanctum, I have it specially constructed for a very good reason."

"I'd rather not, thank you."

"Who said I was giving you a choice?"

She said nothing, rotating her wrist in a circle to work out the stiffened joints. Oh, it was too much. He seized said wrist, planted a kiss on it, before dragging her against him and planting a kiss on those soft, perfect lips. Before he could even begin to pull up the pheromones, she'd shoved him off, disgusted, far more angry than before.

"I thought I'd made it perfectly clear, I will _never _be yours in any way shape or form."

His shoulders slumped – a total defeat. Still, he had to win the war, didn't he? "I hate you," he pleaded. "And I love you. And you confuse me. God, who are you? Aren't I good enough for you?"

She moved to the doorway, prepared to follow him in silent protest to the thick, solid walls of his inner sanctum. "No. No, you're not."

…

It was a good two days _before _all this occurred that Luke had switched on his new lightsaber for the very first time on board the _Millennium Falcon_.

_Don't be red, don't be red, don't be red, oh _please _don't be red._

It had been his most fervent fear above all else that something would go wrong, he would have made a bad crystal, or just _something _and he would come out with a bloody red lightsaber, like every other one he'd made in his lifetime. The only time he hadn't had a red lightsaber was when he'd used his father's discarded one. Now only the Force knew where that had gotten to. Wherever his hand was, he supposed.

Sucking in a breath, he called the Light around him, smiling, reveling in its caressing touch, it's comforting, wordless whisper.

He turned on his lightsaber.

With a _flash hiss _it ignited, gleaming a glittering green in the smuggling ship, making Luke's breath catch in his throat. It was beautiful, astounding. Agile enough for his lithe frame, it also allowed for his body strengths. It was the perfect design, the perfect length, width, height. The perfect color….

He sighed again, smiling as he did a few test swipes. R2D2 buzzed appreciatively, and Luke smiled at the droid.

"Pretty nice, huh, Artoo?"

The astro droid agreed, its lights blinking colorful patterns. Luke switched his saber off, humming to himself, waiting for them to get nearer Coruscant. He wasn't afraid, not anymore.

_I'm coming, Leia. And nothing can stop me._

**To Be Continued…**

_The long and the short of it is that the contest is void and that I need a lot more reviews. Oh, and I got a cell phone, but it's bugging me right now, so lets not talk about that._

Myotismon13: I really liked this chapter, I think you will too, hopefully.

Stephanie C:….And? I didn't say WHAT got explained, just that stuff gets explained.

xInuyashaxangelx: I have done so

denique: Yeah, glad to hear it!


	40. Part 2 Chapter 18

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Eighteen**

"Move over, I want the controls."

Lando raised an eyebrow but did not look up, despite the Jedi's sure and stubborn tone of voice. "The hell you get them. This was _my _ship before Han swindled her."

Luke said nothing, smirked, and with a gentle nudge in the Force, quite effectively shoved Calrissian clear out of the pilot's seat.

"Thanks, Lando."

Grumbling, the gambler rubbed at his head, resigning himself to the copilot's chair. "Sure. Anyway, we're going to be heading toward Coruscant soon."

"I know, that's why I wanted the controls. I've got to give the password to get past the blockade."

Lando stared at him for a long, hard moment, and Luke said nothing. Finally, the other shouted, "Are you nuts? One of the most wanted men in the galaxy, and you're going to let them know you're on Coruscant?"

"The lackeys have hardly memorized my voice. Besides, they'd never think to look for me on Coruscant. What moron would hide out where the heat is hottest?"

"Um, you?"

"Exactly."

Lando continued to stare. "Okkkayyy…." He shook his head and asked, "But wouldn't they change the pass code?"

"You'd think that, wouldn't you? Actually, there's about a dozen of them, a good three of which never change just because they're so strange that no one would ever guess at them. That, and their not used all that often."

"I'm beginning to not like the sound of this."

"Just relax. We're coming up on the Navy blockade."

Indeed they were. Massive ships and thin lines of jammed traffic heading into the center of the civilized galaxy, all surrounded constantly by the Imperial Navy, on invariable watch. Luke smirked. "They're so worried about the Rebellion that they're about to let the former Imperial Prince right inside. Quite willingly, too."

"I don't like this."

"You're a gambler. What's life without a bit of risk?"

"Risk for a very uncertain reward."

Oh, no. The reward was quite certain….Luke sighed, smiled.

_I'm coming, Leia. Just you wait…._

"Corellian freighter," the intercom buzzed, and Luke and Lando shared a look. "Give access key."

"Plug your ears," Luke teased playfully, but quite seriously. Lando reluctantly did so, and Luke gave the pass key. There was a brief amount of silent surprise, and the request to repeat. Luke recited it letter perfect, even spelled it right, too.

They let them in.

"One thing's for sure, they'll probably think someone's finally hacked their precious code complex. They'll probably change it now. Good thing we only have to do this once."

"Good thing indeed….So, um, can I have the controls back?"

"Nope, we've still got to land this sucker."

"Oh, okay," Lando remarked snidely. "And where do you propose we do that, oh exalted one?"

Luke simply looked at him and grinned.

…

"Jeeze, this thing must have been empty for a century!"

"Not quite." With old familiarity, Lando and Luke stepped out of the _Falcon _and into the large, underground cavern, directly below the extensive sewer system. "See, it's this huge maze. They use it to monitor the pipes."

"Alright," Lando asked, "so how do you know about it?"

Luke simply smiled and tapped his skull. "You don't keep secrets from the Imperial Prince. Not if you want to live. Anyway, I used to sneak away and go flying a lot whenever we were stuck on Coruscant. I'd park my TIE here. I just had to make sure to take it out when they checked the pipelines."

"Why would you go flying?"

Luke blinked, looked away. Leia understood, he'd told her just about every secret he had. "I hate Coruscant," he murmured. "It was just a temporary way out. I don't think my father knew. And if he did, he never said anything. I dunno." Luke cleared his throat and looked up, trying not to think too hard. "Anyway, where did Chewie say he'd meet us?"

Lando rattled off the coordinates, and Luke nodded. "So what's your plan for getting into Xizor's palace, hot shot? It's more heavily guarded than that Imperial blockade!"

Luke grinned impishly again, a habit which was starting to cause certain dread within Lando. "Remember those code keys?"

"Yes…." He answered uneasily.

"They apply on land, too."

…

The small bomb had gone off like a charm, distracting everyone enough that it was no trouble to slip in the pass key – no one was monitoring the system, so the computer could just run it through itself. And since that was a key it was programmed to accept…

"You know, it's funny," Luke said, pulling up the hood of his black cassock, "I was kinda thinking Xizor would have cheated the system by now. He was always overly cautious."

"And with good reason, too," Lando snorted, taking his blaster from its holster.

Luke shrugged, maneuvering down the halls. "Let's see….Xizor's Coruscant palace was not exactly a place Lord Vader and his son were invited into numerous times, so I don't have much to go on. Not that Father would have accepted the invitation, even if it was given."

"Less reminiscing, more thinking."

Luke peered over the level guide, humming. "Logically, she should be on…This one," he pointed to it. "Let's go."

"To our certain death?"

"To Leia." And for her, death was worth it.

…

That had been a tricky bit of maneuvering right there. Xizor had to meet up with some of his heads of security, leaving Leia in the hands of Guri. Enough force with a rather heavy belt buckle sent Guri crashing to the ground, giving Leia just enough time to bolt.

And bolt she did.

Not that she knew where she was going.

She figured her best bet was to simply try and find an emergency exit, and so far, two floors down, she'd yet to find one. She was about to round the corner when a set of voices stopped her. Heart hammering in her chest, she flattened herself to the wall, closed her eyes tightly, and tried to think.

The voices were getting closer.

_Wait just a parsec…_

She knew that voice.

Without even thinking, she hurled herself around the corner, crying out, "_Luke_!"

Indeed, the Jedi and his cohort were there, and for a brief instant, Luke froze to the spot in cautious joy. His mind finally registered who it was, and that was all that mattered. "Leia!" There wasn't a moment to lose. He ran, grabbed her, spun her around, and proceeded to cover her face with kisses, pressing her against him and petting her hair anxiously. "I was so worried, you have no idea. Did he do anything to you? I'll kill that slime bag." His worst fears banished, he put her at arms length and shook her fiercely, he beautiful head wobbling back and forth. "Don't you ever do that again!" The brief moment of worried anger past, he held onto her like there was no tomorrow while they jabbered endlessly to calm the other's nerves.

"Yeah, tearful reunion, that's great and all, but may I remind you…_Xizor's whole freaking palace is hunting us down_!" Lando shouted, shoving and pushing them down the hall. After a brief moment of confusion, they went quite blithely and willingly.

…

"Skywalker?" he'd snarled.

"Who else can it be?"

The brief security cam photo was hazy at best before being shut off by Skywalker's intensely annoying handiness with electronics. Where did that boy get it from? And where did he get the impudence to storm his castle and steal his….

Well, what was Leia to him?

Everything.

His….nameless something that he treasured above all things else just because it wasn't really his, making his grip, for the first time in his long life, very precarious. Quite the wonderful change.

But he did not look foreword to a change in losing.

"I'll kill him," he hissed, his claw like fingers tightening on the desk. "I'll kill him, and then I'll kill his father. I'll kill every blood relative I can find, but I want him thoroughly dead!" The guards scattered under their Prince's fury, frightened out of their wits. "Get out! Get out and find him right now! Guri!" he snapped, and his favorite toy in the world nodded in her attention. "Come with me, we're going down to the level where my electronics are still running. He can't have gotten that far yet."

_And I'll make sure he doesn't._

The impudence of that little, bastard pest! Vengeance would be sweet and swift, and he would enjoy every blessed minute of it. And then he'd get his princess back, and make her love him. No matter what it took.

It was all his by right. The strong have the right above all. And there was nobody stronger than he was.

This he was certain of.

**To Be Continued….**

_Lots and lots of stuff going on, so updates are hard. But lots of reviews are a good incentive, hint hint._

Myotismon13: Yeah, I feel kind of bad for him too. And I'm trying to take him off his freakin' god pedestal. He's like the Mary-sue of all villains. It's extremely annoying.

East Coast Ryder: Thank you. Yeah, it is too bad. Maybe some other time….

Stephanie C: It is good, but Xizor is so….unbelievably perfect. He wins. All the time. Everytime. He's rich, women love him, he's smart, etc. It is sooo unbelievably tedious!

xInuyashaxangelx: Aw, thanks, I hate disappointing.

Healing Hands: Thanks, I liked that chapter.

Schnickledooger: Yeah! If you didn't come back soon, I was going to e-mail you. Hope the sideline sheds some light and stuff. Xizor, in all honesty, didn't really do anything, but…..


	41. Part 2 Chapter 19

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Nineteen**

Like pins pricking all of his senses, Luke caught the subtle hints through the Force to be on guard. And that's why, when the gang rounded the corner cautiously, Luke was extremely glad to have already unclipped his lightsaber.

With a _flash, hum_ the green blade ignited and Luke gave a quick swing, diverting two blaster bolts.

"That's new," Leia said wryly, and Chewie growled his agreement. Luke wasn't listening. His eyes were transfixed to the end of the hall and what stood their smugly and just as menacingly as ever.

_Xizor._

Xizor smirked, holding the blaster calmly and smoothly. "Why, if it isn't the Imperial Prince himself. Good day, Lord Skywalker."

"Commander Skywalker will do," Luke snarled, his grip on his weapon tightening.

Xizor's smile grew wider. "The wheel has turned around, I see. Now I am the one on top of the food chain, and I'm the one who has the cards on my side." Luke said nothing in response, so the Falleen continued. "It appears that this time Daddy isn't here to save you. Pity. Or doesn't he know that you're here." The sudden panic that registered in Luke's features were unmistakable. Maybe he'd finally gotten himself past his terror of Xizor, but the idea of falling into the hands of his father still wasn't appealing. "We'll have to give him a call, won't we?"

"Vader isn't on Coruscant," Leia interrupted smoothly, taking a prominent step foreword. "You said so yourself; he's off chasing false Rebel base information that _you _fed him." With a baleful glare, she added, "You need to learn not to brag so much."

Whether her contempt was aimed towards him or not, Xizor's heart melted at the sight of the princess, his cool, vengeful demeanor slipping slightly. This brief moment of emotion was quickly stoppered up with all his customary smooth charm. "Well, look, the cat came back. Hello, kitten."

"What's with all these evil guys abducting me in the name of love?"

Luke briefly whirled. "I resent that comment!"

_Zip!_

They only just ducked in time as another blaster shot rang down the corridor. Luke turned back, a growl on his lips. "This ends today, Xizor."

"Oh, absolutely, I would have to agree."

Not stopping, not thinking, Luke lunged foreword, weapon ready, all the vengeance and passion and anger and hate and-

"Luke, no!"

He couldn't breath. Force, why couldn't he breath? It was like on Dagobah at-

_The cave…._

Before his eyes swam the vision that those words Leia screamed so readily accompanied. There was no Coruscant palace, only the looming Death Star, the clash of lightsabers. His father and his master, and….

Being pushed back now, emotion and sorrow threatening to drown him.

_Master Obi-Wan…._

He'd rushed into battle to save him, and had not been successful. And he missed him more than he could ever have possibly said. He loved that old man with every fiber in his soul.

_Why can't I breath?_

He'd rushed to save him then. So why was he rushing now?

_Jedi do not kill!_

Clear as a bell, the words registered, and the real world came crashing back down around him. He skidded to a halt, staring wild eyed and panting, before swiping his lightsaber across a beam, sending enough debris crashing down around Xizor that he had ample time to turn and herd his loved ones out of there.

"C'mon, we're getting out of here."

…

The travel weary bunch of Star Destroyers that had exited hyperspace mere moments ago crept their way towards Coruscant, thoroughly disheartened by their findings. Vader, standing on the bridge of _The Executor_, arms behind his back, was contemplating the whole thing with a bad taste in his mouth. There was a very good reason Xizor would slip Palpatine news of a secret Rebel base. Vader had not trusted the information in the first place. But to argue with the Emperor was to lose, and he disliked losing. And this ever circling contest with Xizor still had no clear cut winner.

Yes, there had to be a very good reason for the Falleen's act of good citizenship. More importantly, there had to be a very good reason why he'd send them on a wild goose chase of a Rebel base that didn't exist. Maybe it was just for sport. No doubt that miserable piece of filth could tell that what was left of Vader's soul could rise and fly at the chance of catching a Rebel base off guard. The reasoning was simple; his son _was _Rogue Squadron commander. And a damn good job he was doing, too. First rate. But then, he was his boy. That explained it all.

_Luke…._

He missed him desperately. They had parted on bad terms on Bespin. Quite bad. And now Vader was almost certain he'd lost his son's love forever. Maybe not the son itself. He could always force that back. But he couldn't force love. For all the times he'd tried it had never worked.

And there was no one in the whole of the galaxy that Vader loved more than his Luke. It was impossible.

There had better be a damn good reason Vader had just wasted a week hunting down a phantom pocket of insurrection.

There was a sudden gasp of astonishment somewhere to Vader's right, but he didn't hear it. "By all the gods! Lord Vader!" The bridge captain rushed up to him only to come skidding to a halt when Vader clamped the power of the Force around the unsuspecting man's neck.

"You would do better to remember not to interrupt my thought process, Captain Idorath."

"But, My Lord!" he begged, running out of breath. "Please, it is very important."

The Dark Side whispered to listen to him, that it was indeed of great value, and Vader released the man. Pausing for a breath, the harried individual pointed dumbstruck out the window, port side.

_What in all the levels of Sith Hell…?_

"That's Prince Xizor's private navy!" he chocked.

"Attacking a freighter?"

"My Lord, we can identify that as the Corellian vessel, the _Millennium Falcon_!"

All the dots linked together now, and Vader's fists clenched in uninhibited rage.

Oh, there was a damn good reason, alright. But Xizor wasn't dealing with an idiot.

"I shall remember this, Captain."

"T-thank you, My Lord."

"Get me in contact with his skyhook."

"At once, My Lord."

…

"My Prince-"

"Not now."

Xizor was on the edge of his seat. He'd had that sorry scrap heap out numbered and out gunned, but those X-Wing pilots that had been identified as Skywalker's bloody Rogue Squadron had shown up. Even so, Xizor was clearly winning, but it was a severe annoyance.

"But, My Prince, it's Lord Vader!"

Vader? But he was supposed to be…. "Damn it all!" he swore vehemently. "Alright, put him on the screen." The hologram popped up, revealing the looming mask of Vader.

"_Xizor_!"

"Why, it's Lord Vader. My Lord, what a pleasant surprise."

"Damn it, you filthy lizard, don't you dare push your niceties! That ship has been registered as the _Millennium Falcon_, which has a bounty on it for _alive_ as well as unharmed."

"We're in the midst of capturing it now, My Lord." Xizor was clearly giving it everything he had to maintain the illusion of friendliness, and failing miserably.

"You were in the midst of smashing it to pieces. With _my son _on board."

"Is he really? I had no idea-"

"Don't try it. You have three minutes to cease and desist all of this before I knock you right out of the sky. Is that clear, Xizor?"

Something within Xizor snapped, a tick in the cheek, and there was no holding back the water from the open flood gates. "That's _Prince _Xizor to you, you son of some skank from Tatooine! If anyone's a prince in this god damned galaxy, then it is clearly me! Who was your little bastard son's mother, Vader? Was she just as common as you are, some whore you found on the street? Is he even really yours? You and your progeny are a mockery and _I will not bow before you another day! Do you hear me?_ That boy _dies _today!"

There was a collective astonished gasp from the crew of the skyhook, and all minds jointly thought at once, "Prince Xizor's gone mad!" Xizor was panting in a rage, anger pouring off of him like the tide against the shore, pounding mercilessly in his skull. And he cared not one iota what Vader might have to say to the man who held his leash. Palpatine was little to no better. And he wouldn't bow before the Emperor for long either, if it came straight to that. The galaxy _would _be his, and vengeance for what had happened on Falleen would be as painful as he could make it for Vader and his precious boy.

Still, Vader said nothing, registered no emotion. But behind that mask he was smiling the cold smile of a justified murder and a clear cut victory.

"Three minutes, Falleen."

**To Be Continued….**

_Yeah, I got another chapter done! Go me!_

Shi Feng Huang: Your reviews made me so happy I must thank you a million times over.

TorontoBatFan: Yeah, another wonderful review! Muchos gracias, I greatly appreciate it. The fic sounds very interesting, what was it called?

Stephanie C: I love the concept of Xizor. He's a really interesting and dynamic character. In practice, however, the novel sides with him far too much. "Well, he's Xizor, and since he rocks, he gets all this crap." No. Give him a flaw, just one flaw, PLEASE for the love of God.


	42. Part 2 Chapter 20

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Two**

**Chapter Twenty**

The Rogue Squadron pilots had just swooped in when Luke had once more shoved Lando out of the pilots seat. "My former planet, my turn to steer."

"You are insane," Lando growled, sprawled out somewhat indignantly on the ship's floor. Leia helped him up, shaking her head.

"There's no point in arguing. Look at him."

Lando did spare a glance, and Luke was not there at all. He was world's away, piloting the bulky freighter with a lightness of touch that was truly astounding. In fact, he didn't really show any signs of thought until Wedge commed in, and a brief smile burst onto his face.

"We got another call from Chewie that there was some problems going down on Coruscant."

"Did you really?"

"I take it you're fine, then?"

"Oh, you know, it's only Xizor's private navy. Nothing I can't handle."

"Right. Well, I haven't seen action for some time. Mind if we join in the party."

"By all means!"

And from there, little progress was made. At all. In fact, even Luke was starting to bite his lower lip. Leia placed a hand on his shoulder, leaning down to whisper in his ear, worried, and he faltered slightly.

"There's no way we can get out of this. Look, they've netted us in."

He didn't look at her. "Uh huh. I know. But maybe we can take a few of them down with us."

Her gaze moved from the window to him, and he did not look at her. "Luke…"

"I'm going to see if I can call truce for two seconds, get in touch with the _Falleen's Fist_."

"And why on earth would you do something like that?"

"Xizor still loves you, right?" he whispered, now glancing at the hand. "And he's not going to want to blow you up."

"And the point of this is…."

"I get you onto the skyhook. You stay alive."

She quickly collapsed into the co-pilot's seat, stealing one of his hands and clutching it wildly. "Luke, no!"

"Please, don't argue."

"I am staying with you."

He stared at her for a second and turned right back to the window. "I've got to protect you. What would Han say?" he laughed, and she didn't smile.

Instead, she merely held the hand tighter. "If you die, I die. And if you live, then I will live – but only by your side."

He now turned full around, wanting to argue but knowing he couldn't. Finally he said, "I love you, Leia Organa."

She fumbled slightly, smiled, squeezed his hand again. "And I will always care for you more than you will ever realize. But I don't love you the way you want me to."

He said nothing, smiled sadly, and had his attention quickly diverted, this time by Lando on the comm.

"Oh shit….Luke, we've got a problem."

"Tell me something I don't know."

"I'm not joking here," and he rattled off some coordinates for Luke to look at. His head snapped in that direction, and he very quickly paled. "Oh good Lord…."

It was _The Executor_ and a fairly decent chunk of the Imperial Navy, slowly creeping its way in, and having clearly caught notice of the fighting. Luke swallowed hard, turned back to Leia. "Last chance to get you onto that skyhook." She scowled at him, and then at the Super Star Destroyer. Luke sighed, said nothing. Well, so much the better or worse…..

"Why aren't they firing?" wondered Wes aloud, verbalizing everyone's thoughts. And then suddenly, they were!

….But not at them.

A shot struck one of Xizor's ships head on, badly, if not fatally, taking it out. Luke could hear a collective gasp before he stood up in the chair, hands smacking the dashboard. "Yes, Father, I love you!" He burst out into crazy laughter while Leia stared at him.

"You've gone stark raving mad!"

"I can't believe it!" cried Luke. "I just can't believe it! Show that Falleen scum!"

"Luke!" Leia grabbed him by the arm, dragging him back into his chair as he hummed, occasionally bursting out into laughter. There was then a sudden bright, hot light, a very large flash, and they had to blink several times to clear their eyes of the spots dancing before them. "By the Force…." Leia whispered.

"What?" Luke asked, rubbing his eyes. "What is it?"

"Look," she pointed, her voice hoarse.

There was no skyhook. At all. It was just gone.

Luke stared like her, jaw agape, trying to process this. No skyhook. No Xizor.

His father had shot him right out of the sky. And he had to know that his son was on board the attacked vessel.

_Father…._

Leia snorted, shook her head. "Well, there goes another suitor. Farewell, Xizor. Rest in peace."

Luke wasn't listening, staring at the Super Star Destroyer while many of the X-Wings were getting out of there as fast as they could before any sort of attack could be formulated against them.

"Saving me from my nightmares again, Father?"

"Luke, we have to get out of here, now!" Lando was shouting through the comm., and Leia was trying desperately to wake him from his reverie.

After a moment, he blinked, said "What, huh? Yes, right, going!" He punched in the right codes, and before he knew what he was doing, they were gone.

And that was that.

…

"My Lord Vader? They've…They've gone. _The Millennium Falcon_ as well as the Rogue Squadron pilots made a swift retreat."

Vader stood staring at the spot where Xizor had once been living and breathing. Very really, very tangible, mildly threatening.

"Yes, thank you, Captain Idorath."

Idorath breathed a sigh of relief, glad not to be dead. "Should we continue our course for Coruscant, sir?"

"Yes, that would be good."

He clicked his heels together, gave a militaristic bow. "Sir. I'll see to your shuttle once we are close enough to orbit."

Vader this time didn't respond, still watching.

Real, tangible, and threatening. Only because he had once upon a time dared to touch a hair on his son's perfect head.

Vader closed his eyes, took in a bigger breath than usual. Those days had been almost….happy in comparison to now. Unless Xizor had to come on the scene, but he'd carefully hidden Luke away after that first encounter. The emperor had not been pleased that he had tried to chock the head of Black Sun, but the incident had been explained, and Vader made it clear he was very unrepentant. In such situations, there was little to do. Any punishment would only have strengthened Vader's dogged determination to keep his son and heir to the throne out of as much danger as possible.

But there were enough things out there that he could never protect him from.

_"You didn't save me from my nightmares…Obi-Wan would do that…."_

He probably had no idea how those words tortured him. He neither slept nor lived nor breathed for days at a time if they dared to creep into his thoughts. Obi-Wan. Always compared to Obi-Wan. Anakin, you should exercise more control, do as your master does. Anakin, you will never be a truly good Jedi until you control you anger, like Obi-Wan. Anakin, Obi-Wan would never have fallen to the Dark Side.

Vader, your son loves Obi-Wan better than he loves you.

Did he?

_Luke…._

What was it Jade had said to him those two years ago? That he'd never kill him. That he was too weak, too much of a father. And she'd never let him. What had she meant by that last statement? Crazy, insubordinate girl. She and Luke had used to run here and there and everywhere together. Nobody could understand why. Their destinies were entirely different, their places and uses very much apart. So why were they always glued together.

Was he too weak a person, too much a father to have killed his son?

Well, he did just fire on Xizor's skyhook. But that could be explained away in a million different ways none of which involving Luke.

But he did think about him constantly.

_I still love you more than you will ever know._

Oh yes, yes he did. He always would. There was no escape for it. He'd been willing to choke the head of Black Sun, kill Obi-Wan, risk his position, even kill his Master's other favorite and get into something of an argument with the Emperor's Hand over it. And he would do far worse if it were necessary. He adored that boy, he always would.

_I miss you._

And that was the real tragedy of it. He found he could revel in little pleasure of finally knocking off Xizor, shoving him out of his way. And in a way, he was just as glad Luke had escaped.

Something told him that he would be seeing him again. Sooner than he might think. But not soon enough.

_I love you._

**To Be Continued…**

_Sorry for the long break, guys! I've been super busy, and desperately needed the sabbatical. I do greatly appreciate your patience. And with that….PART TWO IS OVER! WHOOT! Wow, what do you know? It's the exact same length as Part One. Ironic. Anywho, the next chapter will be the transition into Part Three and Return of the Jedi. It's that power packed finales that awaits! Whoot! Keep reading, loyal fans, I'll try and make updates a bit more often._

East Coast Ryder: Oh, wow, thank you

Schnickledooger: Sorry I didn't respond, I got your review too late '. Anyway, don't distress. As for Xizor, insulting Shmi, Padmè, _and _Luke all in the same paragraph is like pointing a gun at your chest and asking someone to fire. He's toast.

Stephanie C: Why choke someone when blowing them up into teeny tiny pieces is oh so satisfying?

Yeah, and she hasn't even met Jabba yet! Personally, I think Xizor's her best choice out of the bunch.

Shi Feng Huang: Oh 'twas pretty. Shiny lights….

darth mojo the spork: Thank you very much It takes constant improvement, but I don't think I do so bad, myself. If you look at the earliest chapter of this and the latest, you can detect differences. At least, I can. But that could just be me.

Myotismon13: Bad idea? No, no, I think it falls into the category of suicidal.

Katharina: I can see how you might take it as a gay relationship, but it's honestly not. I have no problems with slash, but I don't really like it. Luke just had a huge mental breakdown and Obi-Wan was the only stable thing to cling to. So he did. And once Luke clings, he _clings_. So, no, it's not a gay relationship. Because frankly, Obi-Wan's waaay too old. But that's not the point.

denique: I trust the release from the cliffhanger satisfied you.

Shi Feng Huang: I dunno, I'm not quite sure Vader would look good in snake skin….. What disappointed me about SotE was that Xizor was such a complete gary-stu. For such a dynamic sounding character, I was expecting a couple more faults and some things to make him way more interesting. Too bad. Maybe I should stop before my head explodes, but I kinda like my Xizor better than the real one. And there's my ego boost for the day.


	43. Entr'acte

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Entr'acte**

Luke sucked in a deep breath, the air hot and dry, not quite to the point that he would have started coughing. There was only a slight breeze, not enough to kick up the sand, for which he was grateful for. Sand got into everything, which was something he had forgotten about Tatooine.

And there were so many things to forget about Tatooine.

He'd spent most of the afternoon in Mos Eisley, conning gullible suckers out of information on the Lars massacre of four years ago. And he'd been moderately successful. At any rate, he'd managed to find his way back there, where crumbling ruins just barely poked their heads out of the sand, and a few very long gravestones still stood, bleached by the sun. Enough of the names he didn't recognize, but the important ones he did. Owen and Beru Lars. Just like…he….that boy….he had said, in that strange dream vision. After….

No, he didn't need to tell himself not to think about it now. He looked back and he saw no pain. No pain at all. How extraordinary. In fact, this was strangest of all, he even felt….love again, towards his father. An emotion that had been absent for so very long. He sucked in another breath, thought about the other gravestone he recognized.

Shmi Skywalker. His grandmother. He'd stood there revering it for some time, just kind of wondering about it. About her. About his father.

About his mother.

He liked to replay that dream he'd had of her and Obi-Wan in his mind, it made him smile. His father had been right about one thing, she was terribly beautiful. Painfully so. Oh, his father's heart must have broken to lose her however he did.

_Maybe I'll never know?_

But Luke thought he would. He thought very much that he would.

He'd returned back to Obi-Wan's little hermit hut mid to late afternoon. They had been staying on board the ship, but Luke found himself so inevitably drawn to that old shack that he finally convinced everyone that it was absolutely necessary to stay in it. Lando had been gone for three weeks now, and Leia had done an admirable job of cleaning up the place. It had been dusty, and of course sandy. It had gone without use for four years.

_Obi-Wan…._

And Luke still loved Obi-Wan, too. The moment upon entering he had to stop, squint in the darkness, looking very mature and old wearing all black once more, but not evil. Not in the least bit like a Sith, if it really came to that. He had to pause reverently, gasp; move as more of a shadow, gingerly touching something as though for fear it might shatter. Once that fear would be allayed, he'd eventually lay his hands fully on it, astounded and quite pleasured at the sensation. He briefly recalled the course of events right after Yavin IV; the wild grief, the dozens of failed suicide attempts, and especially the bitter sweet dreams and tears all for the old man whom he adored and worshiped. It all seemed like a dream now. Was he ever the Imperial Prince? It didn't seem quite possible. And it didn't seem possible that he was this tortured young man who could not breath without pain. Oh, there was still pain. There would always be pain. But he could draw a breath, smile, and reflect on it all with a marvelous patience. Sit for hours, meditating, focusing, so calm, so at peace. No conflict, how extraordinary, no conflict. Just him and his black cassock and austere clothing and his brand new green lightsaber. The cassock was for Obi-Wan, that he recognized, but he debated with himself about the choice of color. Recognition for his past? A symbol of mourning? Or simply a statement of how things were. He was quite changed now. He was a serious young man of twenty two, breathing easier, still in pain, but realizing so many things weren't the correct answer. He had yet to find the correct answer, but there he was.

A Jedi. Wouldn't his master be proud?

Entering the hut he had to blink to adjust his eyes to the light, but there was Leia, calmly holding out a cup of water to him and a little food. He wasn't very hungry, but dreadfully thirsty, and ate and drank it all gratefully.

"Did you find what you were looking for?" she asked, sitting down on the edge of the bed while Luke took the chair he'd occupied when with Obi-Wan. He'd made it perfectly clear that one eccentricy of his that must be followed to the letter was no one sat in Obi-Wan's chair. Lando had tried protesting shortly before leaving for Jabba's palace, but Leia hadn't even attempted it. Leia knew Luke's ways, and there was no way Luke would let anyone else _ever _sit in that chair again. Far too many memories.

Luke nodded, swallowing his last drink of the precious water supply. Hell, did he hate Tatooine. But not for the same reasons as before. Before he had been mired in too much emotion. He had now risen calmly above it, gliding on the surface of past pains into a better life. At least, that's what he hoped lay ahead. "Yeah, I found the old homestead. Not much left of it. Just a bunch of sand, mostly…."

"Maybe it's better that way."

"Yeah…."

And they sat in respectable silence for a while, Luke watching her calmly with a thoughtful expression on his face. "I think…" he said at last, "I think Obi-Wan would be proud of me."

"I think he always was."

He flushed, looked away and instead at the empty chair.

_Obi-Wan…._

No sign of Obi-Wan since Dagobah…

Dagobah! Oh, Force, he'd passed his twenty second birthday and had yet to return to Dagobah. Never mind what Obi-Wan _would_ have thought of him, what would Master Yoda think when he returned.

Luke took a deep breath. He had priorities, and maybe they weren't ones Master Yoda would agree with, but he had to follow where his heart lead. At least he'd learned that.

The young man figured he'd done a lot of growing up in the four years it had been since he'd left the Dark Side, his position, and the only family he'd ever had. He'd also learned a lot of truth and a lot of lies. Lies or truth like whether Obi-Wan had really kidnapped him from his mother. There was a good question, one he'd chosen not to dwell on for a while. Still, it bore discussion, and Yoda would know, once he had a chance to get to Dagobah. But that could wait for a while. Maybe he'd never know the whole truth, but he knew enough to get by on for now, and as long as he could get by, then, well….he was doing alright.

Except one thing.

He now sighed, turning back to Leia again who watched him expectantly. He smiled, rising, and offering her his hands. She accepted and he pulled her up, embracing her fondly. They pulled apart, smiling for no reason at all. "Last chance to ditch Han and let me carry you away."

She snorted. "Not going to happen, Jedi."

_Jedi….That sounds nice._

He smiled sadly, nodded. He still loved her and he always would. But he wouldn't be a sore loser. Instead, he leaned foreword and she leaned in, letting him kiss her forehead. "I could not have given you up for anyone less deserving than that scoundrel Solo."

She smiled. "I could not have refused you for anyone else."

"Well, with that settled," he replied, releasing her, "we might as well get ready. R2, you around here?" The blue astro droid buzzed, wheeling over the sandy floor. "There you are. Come on, now, I've got a very important message for you."

R2D2 beeped again and Luke lay a hand on the smooth dome, bending down to adjust some knobs before standing up straight. "How do I look?"

Artoo beeped and Leia sighed, "Just fine, you narcissist."

Luke smirked, winked, and pulled his cassock straight, trying to look as powerful and proud as he could. "Greetings, oh powerful Jabba…."

And from there he simply rattled off the speech he'd written up to kiss some Hutt ass. It was a little painful that he, once Imperial Prince, Heir to the Empire, was now groveling to a sandworm, but, well, Han was worth it. But he'd already known that.

_Just hold on, Han. I'm on my way._

**To Be Continued….**

denique: ' sorry! Unfortunately, she still doesn't appear until the epilogue. If it's any consolation, I'll be doing a sideline on what she was doing while Lukie was being tortured and stuff, but only after I finish the fic. Too many spoilers.

Stephanie C: I'm really glad you liked it.

Insane Pineapple from Naboo: Yes, but the end's a long way off yet.

Myotismon13: I kind of felt bad for just kicking him out like that, but another Xizor's tormented moment wouldn't have fit.

Shi Feng Huang: Hehe, thank you. Well, I personally thought Guri was an annoying snot, much like Xizor. I wasn't a terribly big fan of the whole book, but ..' ….. Why? What does Luke have to find out about Leia? It's not like they're related or something….

Baculities: Yeah! Thank you! Cookie for the new fan!

Ledagirl321: Wow, neat, thank you very much! Hope I haven't made your mom too annoyed at you. You can have a cookie too!


	44. Part 3 Chapter 1

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Three**

**Chapter One**

The great, rusty door slowly drew open, harsh sunlight pouring in and blinding the Gamorrean guards standing by. There was a feeling of slight apprehension, something deeply unsettling about the eerie silence of the palace and the figure in the door. A mere silhouette, the shape was tall, thin, drowning in a dark robe, human in shape. The hood drawn up over the face, the thing strode purposefully in, pausing briefly as the guards advanced, trying to feel brave with spears in hand. A sneer crossed the unseen face, and with a wave of his hand, the Gamorreans dropped their weapons and stepped back.

One did not meddle with Luke Skywalker when he had a purpose in mind.

It would not have been difficult to picture the twenty two year old as the Sith he once was, considering he was dressed from head to toe in black. Maybe he looked like what he would have at that age had he remained a Sith, but he was not at all the way he'd been four years ago. He had been wild, brash, angry, steaming, constantly restless. He was tamed, respectful, peaceful, calmed, smooth, and very much in accordance with how things were. He disliked them, but he accepted them.

He was very much the Jedi he desperately wanted to be.

He had gained his current calm at a terrible price. Four years of life, people he'd loved, and a venerable lifetime of pain. He had a few scars, most of which had faded. He had multiple suicide attempts to his name, billions of murders, and years of self hatred and hatred of others. But it all culminated and subsided, leaving only the cool, calm, patient young man who walked through the gate to Jabba's palace at that moment. He had gone from powerful holy prince to the Empire to something less. And something equally more.

A tall, humanoid alien crawled out of the gloom, his beady eyes watching the Jedi warily. He raised his hand to stop the man's advancement, but Luke brushed right past him, not at all interested in whatever it was Bib Fortuna had to say. Fortuna blinked, spun on his heels, and followed Gamorrean guards falling in behind.

"I must speak to Jabba," Luke said smoothly, looking straight ahead as he walked. Fortuna replied with a stern no in Huttese, shaking his head. Luke stopped, slowly raising his head in the direction of the alien, who cowered slightly. If he had been used to getting his way as Imperial Prince, the feeling had not left him, and this stooge to a piece of gangster scum was not about to stop him.

"You will take me to Jabba _now_," he growled, raising his hand slightly. There was no room for argument, and Fortuna nodded in assent.

"You serve your master well."

"I serve my master well…."

"And you will be rewarded."

If the hall he'd left behind was dim, it was practically night inside Jabba's disgusting throne room, and Luke had to blink several times to allow his eyes to adjust to the gloom. Fortuna left his side, slinking over to Jabba and whispering, "Master…" waking the great hulk of bulbous fat. The Hutt awoke with a start, blinking bleary yellow eyes that showed no spark of intelligence or anything beyond base and instinctual desires, and Luke felt distinctly revolted by him, wanting very much to draw away. The stench of the place alone was disgusting, and the Force buzzed and hummed and cracked around him, whispering in his ear in its wordless language.

"…Luke Skywalker, Jedi Knight."

Luke grinned unconsciously, chest puffing out slightly. Oh, how well that sounded.

" I told you not to admit him "

"I must be allowed to speak."

Jabba's greasy eyes slid down to Skywalker, who stared defiantly and expectantly right back. Jabba was trying to be intimidating, but the only person who really succeeded in that field at the moment was Luke.

" You weak minded fool! "

_And what are you, Jabba? We will soon find out…._

" He's using an old Jedi mind trick! "

Luke stepped foreword, yanking down his hood to reveal his pale blue eyes, set firm and looking rather menacing.

"You will bring Captain Solo and the Wookie to me." And there was no room for argument. Everyone in the entire room could feel who was really in charge of the situation. But Jabba was not one who gave up lightly.

Luke glanced down to the girl curled reluctantly at the Hutt's feet, and no matter her….less than delicate costuming, Luke could recognize Leia in an instant. A slow grin spread across his face and he raised an eyebrow. Leia both smiled and glared all at once, with an expression that clearly read, "Don't even think about it."

" Your mind tricks will not work on me, boy. "

"Nevertheless, I'm taking Captain Solo and his friends. You can either profit by this…or be destroyed."

_Do you know who I really am, Jabba? Do you know I was the Imperial Prince? Do you have any clue who my father is? Don't think for an instant I won't do it._

"The choice is yours, but I warn you not to underestimate my powers."

Jabba roared laughing, yanking on Leia's chain.

_Oh, he did not just…_

Leia was instantly more afraid for Jabba than anyone else, as Luke had _the _look in his eyes. The left one twitched spasmodically, and a sneer formed on his face. Bubbling hot rage poured through his veins, though it did nothing to entice him to the Dark Side. That _bastard_ had just hurt _his _Alderaanian princess. Okay, so she wasn't his, but she was his closest friend, and he would make Jabba regret more than anything in the world that he had _ever _chosen Leia Organa to be his latest toy.

" There will be no bargain, Jedi. "

_That's it. Lard dies._

" I will enjoy watching you die. "

_…Wait, what?_

Luke immediately stretched out his hand, sending a blaster flying into it. But Jabba was one step ahead, and shouting, "Bascka!" Luke and a guard went tumbling down a hole in the floor. The blaster went off in his hand, firing harmlessly into the roof before it was gone completely, leaving Luke slightly disoriented in the dark of the pit and the Gamorrean squealing like the stuck pig he was. He could hear distant jeers as his head swam, and Leia screaming, "Luke, no!"

He didn't have time to reminisce on the painful times she'd said that, as a massive, drooling Rancor came stomping into the holding cell, and Luke's vision briefly tunneled.

_Oh, shit, I'm gonna die._

…

He did not.

Instead, what must have been close to an hour but felt like mere moments later, the Rancor was dead, Luke was dragged out of the pit, sentenced to death by Jabba, and standing next to a blind man and a Wookie on a skiff headed out to the middle of nowhere, extremely uncomfortable as he was, once again, in black clothes on Tatooine.

Well….this wasn't quite the way he'd planned it.

The sun beat mercilessly down, and it took all of the Jedi's strength not to let his thoughts wander to unpleasant topics – like Obi-Wan – but to stay firmly rooted in reworking this. Shouldn't be hard, and he was pretty sure with a certain smoothness and pride that he had it all covered. Yes…Yes that should do it….

_I hate Tatooine._

The skiff stopped around a sandy pit, massive teeth and slimy tentacles thrashing about anxiously. Luke peered over before glancing up at the sailing barge where the windows were opened and Jabba and his degenerate court could view the proceedings with perverse pleasure.

"Victims of the almighty Sarlacc," Threepio was translating. "His Excellency hopes that you will die honorable. But should any of you wish to beg for mercy, the great Jabba the Hutt will now listen to your pleas."

Luke's blood boiled again, snarling as he privately recalled that he was once the Imperial Prince, and would never, _ever _bow down to some over grown sand worm.

_You know what, Jabba? You can kiss my a-_

"Threepio!" Han cut Luke's thoughts short. "You tell that piece of worm ridden filth he'll get no such pleasure from us."

"Jabba," Luke called, trying to sound reasonable. "This is your last chance. Free us or die."

Jabba boomed some nonsense in Huttese, and Luke's bonds were cut. For a brief second he almost thought Jabba had listened, but no, he was merely moved into position on the plank. Oh well, he was going to enjoy killing that slimy bastard anyway. He glanced up and saw Artoo sitting in ready, and a soft smile crossed Luke's lips. He saluted, jumped, spun and grabbed the plank, catapulting himself back up and onto the skiff, just in time to catch his lightsaber flying through the air.

_Here's where the fun begins._

…

Luke had been smiling with slight pain as he released Leia into Han's waiting arms, grimly refusing to just stick with the rest on board the Falcon, favoring his X-Wing.

"I've…got somewhere I have to be."

"Luke, not the Core again!"

"The Core? With that bounty on your head? Skywalker, what were you doing in the Core!"

Han was ignored and Luke instead shook his head. "No, Force, no. It's about as opposite the Core as you get. Don't worry, I'll catch up later."

"Just hurry," Leia said, deciding to chance it and embrace him, and Luke felt a strange combination of pain and pleasure, gulping and very lightly wrapping his arms around her.

_I still lose out to Han…_

He finally released her, making it plain enough that while her affections were appreciated, they served more to hurt than to heal. "I'll hurry," he promised in a hoarse whisper, giving a last smile and nod to the others before scrambling up his X-Wing and to the waiting R2. He took off as fast as he could, trying to shove away the painful ache in his chest, sucking in a deep breath. Artoo beeped something, momentarily distracting him.

"That's right, Artoo, we're going to the Dagobah system. I have a promise to keep."

And hell if he'd let Yoda push him and smack him around and lord it over him that he'd lost to his father and anything else. He promised merely to stay on the Light Side and return to train. And even if it had taken just about two years to do it, he was going back.

So there.

**To Be Continued…**

_Originally, I was going to say I was sad because I wasn't getting a whole lot of reviews, but they boosted up a bit Still, no reason not to send in some more ;)_

Ledagirl321: I hope the little bit I stuck in at the end was satisfactory.

denique: -bows- many thank yous

Spirit White: Oh, wow, thank you very much Always appreciate a new fan.

Stephanie C: I think Mara would share your opinion.

Madame Naberrie: Having addressed most of this in your message, I just want to skim a bit. Wow, you are so, so flattering To answer your question, I'm 16, and I'm hoping that doesn't make you feel even more worthless, because you're really not. Feel free to e-mail or message me or whatever else you like, but I am very, very glad you like the fic

Tap Dancing Widow: Oh, that's really cool! I haven't interviewed anybody famous at all – sigh – I am super glad you like the fic, and hope this update arrives right on time for you! Many thanks!


	45. Part 3 Chapter 2

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Three**

**Chapter Two**

Anakin Skywalker had never been a patient person. As young Skywalker died and Darth Vader was born, there grew a sense of patience, a rising ease, sprouting endurance.

And it seemed utterly unfair that one person could shatter twenty two years of a patient life.

Vader was anxious. He'd been sent to dog the footsteps of Jerjerrod on board the second Death Star – which, by the by, the building of which Vader had strictly opposed. But there was no arguing with the emperor when he got an idea in his head, and the only thing to do was obey. Jerjerrod was stuffy, not unintelligent, but ambitious, and that was both sin, crime, and quality all at once. He was not nearly so cautious as he ought to be, his ambition stood in the way. Jerjerrod now more nervously maintained the Death Star would be completed on time, nervous only because the emperor was coming.

Was landing, in fact, right now, with hundreds of thousands of Storm Troopers, officers, and the like ready.

And Vader was anxious. Not for the emperor. There was only one thing that called at his numb soul, one thing that enticed and galled him….

_Luke._

And when he ought to be tracking down his son after his disappearance from Coruscant a few months back, he was babysitting Commander Jerjerrod, the stuffy, malignant bastard.

The shuttle had landed, and with a click and the hiss of slowly releasing pressure, the ramp began to lower, and Vader took a few steps closer, waiting. Nothing but Palpatine's terrible, yellow eyes were visible from the hood of his cassock, and a wrinkled, gnarled hand emerged from the shadows, beckoning the dark lord's dark servant closer. Vader walked to the end of the gangplank, waiting for Palpatine to finish his slow decent, a weakening shell of a still very powerful man. But Vader pushed thoughts of deceit from his mind, they held no place here. They were dangerous….

Vader bent the knee once Palpatine reached the bottom, and in his husky, dry voice, the emperor said, "Rise, my friend." Vader did so, passing by Jerjerrod and the other commanders, still kneeling, suppliant.

After a careful, casual moment of silence, Vader said, "The Death Star will be completed on time."

"You have done well, Lord Vader." Of course he had. "…And now I sense you wish to continue your search for your son."

It was amazing that Vader's feet kept going as his heart had entirely stopped. No, he wasn't entirely surprised the emperor knew that Vader was hungry to continue the hunt. It didn't take a great deal of brains to know that that was what Vader desired more than anything. Xizor had seen it, when he'd still been alive, and Jade could hardly fail to note it, probably with her infernal sense of self righteousness.

Now where was that girl, anyway? Not seeing her for months wasn't exactly unheard of, but it seemed unusual. When he'd asked the emperor before, he dismissed she was on some planet, training or some such thing. Vader didn't like it, not at all…

But he had better things to worry about. The emperor was expecting a reply, and the only thought that really dominated was how badly he wanted his son back.

"Yes, my master," he admitted rather softly, glancing down at the man much shorter than he was.

"Patience, my friend." _Everyone_ always said that! Yoda and Obi-Wan and Padmè and Palpatine. There was no escaping it, and with the last name he generally accomplished it. But, no, not now, not after four years, not after destroying Xizor above Coruscant and fighting his son on Bespin, and…. "In time, he will seek you out." Now Vader did stop walking, his breathing refraining from becoming erratic only because it was regulated by the blasted respirator he was forced to wear.

Palpatine paused, looking back at him with shrewd, slightly irritated expectancy. "And when he does, you must bring him before me."

_That _made Vader cower. Luke was a Rebel traitor, and he was not sure that his position as heir to throne could save him from a terrible revenge the emperor might have in store for him. Unless…

"He has grown strong." Oh yes, he had. "Only together can we turn him back to the Dark Side of the Force."

Vader nodded, gulped, and kept walking at his emperor's side.

_You cannot escape your fate, Luke. No matter what it might be…._

…

"That face you make. Look I so old to young eyes?"

He did look old, that was true enough.

Luke had arrived on Dagobah, very much a Jedi, but making it quite clear he would take whatever Yoda dished at him, but only so far. There was a vague sense of who he was, and he would fight to the death to maintain it. But if Luke had expected a reprimand, he'd been let off surprisingly easy.

"Fight your father, did you?" he'd asked.

Flushing, stuttering for only a moment, Luke replied with a hot, "Yes."

"Win you did not."

"No, Master Yoda."

There had been a slight pause, Luke still showing no real remorse before Yoda pointed to the hut with his Gimmer stick. "Inside, go you. Dinner we will have." Luke had smiled softly, and followed the old Jedi in. And there they sat now, calm and cool and quiet while Luke absorbed the sight with his big, sad blue eyes.

"No," he whispered in response to the Jedi's question. "No, of course not."

Yoda smiled, weakly leaning on his stick for support. "I do, yes, I do. Sick, I have been. Old and weak…"

"Never, Master Yoda."

Yoda looked up at him again, chuckling. "When nine hundred years old you reach, look this good you will not." But the laugh became a cough, and Luke worriedly helped the Jedi into his chair, tucking the blanket around him, eyes sad pools.

"Soon I will rest. Forever sleep, yes. Earned it, I have."

"Not yet, Master, _please _don't go yet." Yoda twitched a pointy ear, looking up, expecting. "I…I need you. I kept my promise, see?"

Yoda smiled weakly. "Yes…." He whispered. "Young Skywalker, as good as his word."

"I tried. I tried very hard."

"Mhm. Grown much, you have. Proud, Obi-Wan is of you."

Luke froze, eyes sharp, breathing short. "Master Yoda….My father-"

"Face your father you must, if a Jedi you will become."

"But I…Master, he said something to me, about….about Master Obi-Wan. Force," he ran a hand through his hair, deciding honesty was the best policy. "Vader said that Obi-Wan kidnapped me from my mother. Master Yoda, I _must _know. Is it true? This is something you've got to tell me."

Yoda was slightly shocked, trying to garner up his last strength, failing slightly as he sank back into the bed. "Ask Obi-Wan, you must."

"Master, I-"

"But all of this depends, as Obi-Wan has told you before," he paused for a cough and Luke leaned in, desperate, "on how view you the world. Yes, Luke, from your mother you were taken, and by Obi-Wan. And reluctant she was. But think you, _think_! Know you, in your heart, whether your father speaks the truth or not. And Obi-Wan….shall you ask…." Luke carefully pillowed the Jedi's head in his hands, gulping as he watched the soul begin to fade from the body, offered up the interconnectedness of the everlasting Force. "Luke…Luke…."

"I'm here, Master Yoda, I'm here…."

"You are not the only….Sky…walker…."

Luke blinked, his jaw dropped, and he burned with another question. But Yoda was gone, he could see that, and in the dark silence of the lonely hut he whispered, "Master?" And there was no reply. Horrified, he slowly set the frail old body of a great and wonderful Jedi down, backing away in abject terror.

_I am here alone…._

He doused the lights in the house, turned back to the body of Yoda to find it gone, just as gone as Obi-Wan's had been when his father had struck him down. Luke crawled from the house, shivering in fear.

"I can't do it… I can't go on alone."

"But, Luke, you are never alone, remember? I made you a promise."

Luke looked up, gulped again and drew back. The shimmering blue ghost of Obi-Wan stood, patient and tall.

"Master Obi-Wan…."

"You look surprised to see me. And none too happy."

"I…" Luke faltered, taking a few steps closer. "I…" He rushed up, stopping just short of rushing into his arms as he had the last time. "Why weren't you there for me on Bespin?" he demanded now. "Why, Obi-Wan, why do you leave me alone when I need you the most?"

"I've already told you, Luke," he replied softly, opening one arm to him. "You are never alone." And then Luke could not resist but to rush into the Jedi's arms, allowing silvery tears to slide down his cheeks in mourning for everything that had been sacrificed over the last four years.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he coughed, choking on his own emotion. "You promised you wouldn't lie to me."

"I didn't lie to you, not this time."

"Then who do I believe?" he insisted, pulling away slightly. "I don't know _who _to believe anymore!"

"Luke," Obi-Wan said with a great sigh, motioning his former padawan over to a log to sit on while the ghost momentarily paced. "Your mother, Padmè Amidala Skywalker, was a strong and good person, and she did not break where your father had. But no one could really protect her or you from your father or the Emperor were he to ever find out. And in Anakin's mind, yes, I did kidnap you, you were destined to be a Sith. But Anakin never quite learned that he was not always so right as he thought. If you stayed with your mother, you were doomed to become exactly like your father. And so I volunteered to take you to Tatooine, to live with your step uncle and aunt."

Obi-Wan sat down now, rubbing his hands together briefly. "Here," he said softly. "Let me finally tell you the whole truth."

**To Be Continued…**

_You guys are going to LOVE the next chapter. In other news, well, wow….ROTJ, already. And I'm so full of zeal that the chances of another update or two within the next ten hours is somewhat likely (I've already gotten the next chapter written.) In a way, it's kind of sad. I was hoping maybe I wouldn't finish until late February, a sort of one year anniversary thing. But I am on a role, and I am really looking foreword the rest of this. Also of my sad note is that I don't think Part Three will be 20 chapters, which is really too bad. It was totally unplanned that both the first parts would be twenty chapters, it just worked out that way. But ROTJ is shorter than the other two, so, well, not much to do. But enough of that! Thanks for all the wonderful reviews for the last chapter, and hello to new fans! Much love and kisses._

Ledagirl321: Oh, are you? Then what you've got to read is "The Shadows Suit Me," by Luke1. One of the first SW fics I read and a classic! And Luke1 is a really nice person. So, um, yes, you'd love it.

Angel Sanada: And there's more after this.

Madame Naberrie: I'm actually not a big EU person. My personal fav is the Original Trilogy. So, the fic's going to end the day after the Battle of Endor, but there will be sidelines after that, those won't probably ever really stop. Oh, don't worry about high school. It's really not all that scary. You'll do fine.

Spirit White: Oh, thanks! I liked that bit

Tap Dancing Widow: Really? ESB's my favorite, closely followed by ROTJ.

HermioneSkywalker: Ishn't he sho coot?

Stephanie C: Yes, sorry, Yoda snuff's it.

denique: Oh, no problem Thanks much, happy new year!

Schnickledooger: Oh, sorry on the dentist. Don't worry, at the rate I'm going, you'll see her far sooner than you or I want to.


	46. Part 3 Chatper 3

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Three**

**Chapter Three**

"What happened to your father, Luke, was my fault."

Luke looked sharply up at the pale blue ghost of the mentor he adored, shaking his head unbelieving. "Mustafar was not your fault," he said slowly, with marked meaning.

Obi-Wan blinked at him, taking a seat next to him on the log. "He told you, then, what happened there?"

"Well, a little, but I…"

"But you saw it."

Luke looked away, blinked. "Yes, I saw it."

Obi-Wan reached out a hand for his pupil, about to brush a stray lock of hair away, but decided better, and put the hand down. "I'm sorry this all had to happen."

Luke nodded. "I know you are. But what else, Master Obi-Wan, what else?"

"I went to try and save him, and I failed, Luke. And more than anything else I didn't want to fail with you. For seventeen years, you don't know how I waited, living with...with all of that guilt."

"You didn't fail."

"But I _did_. You shouldn't have grown up a Sith and it is-"

"But can't you see, it doesn't matter anymore? I _am _a Jedi, no matter what anyone else says about it. Alright, let's pretend you got me to Tatooine. There would have been something else to regret, Master, there always will be. I know that now. But I…I don't know…I just…."

Obi-Wan watched him for a moment, and Luke finally looked up, blinking sad eyes. "There is still good in him."

Obi-Wan shook his head. "You believe that, if it gives you comfort."

"_No_," he snarled. "That's _not _why."

"Your father is dead, Luke. It is as Yoda said, and I saw for myself. You must let go."

"No…The man he was before, yes, but I was raised by that man Vader. So…my father has never left. Really, he's always been one step behind me." Luke stood now, and the ghost watched him curiously as he closed his eyes against the dark of the night, rubbing his shoulders, back to his mentor. "You love a memory. I just love what's left over."

Obi-Wan smiled briefly, whispering. "Yes…yes, I believe you do, Luke."

"That's why I can't kill him."

"That's why you must kill him."

Luke slowly rotated on his heels, shaking his head and staring at the fallen Jedi. "If you'd asked me to four years ago, alright. But not now, Obi-Wan, not anymore. I couldn't bear it."

"You have a compassionate heart, Luke. You have your mother's heart." Luke swallowed hard, disliking the turn in the conversation. "But that is what will be your downfall."

"You can't fall when you're already down."

"But you've risen up."

"Yes…" he whispered. "I suppose I have….I _am _a Jedi."

"Yes, Luke, you are."

They looked at each other for a moment, and Obi-Wan finally looked away, trying to decide how best to say this. "Yoda told you, before he died, that you are not the only Skywalker."

"He meant my father."

Obi-Wan looked up at him and shook his head. "No, not in this case."

Luke stared, slack jawed. "What?"

"You have a twin sister, and for safety's sake she had always remained, and _will _always remain, safely anonymous."

Luke watched him, not moving so much as a muscle. "Obi-Wan, I swear, if you don't tell me who she is, I'm going to-"

"Alright, calm down. But it's no secret, Luke. You already know."

"I what?"

"Search your feelings."

Damn. Damn searching his feelings, _why _couldn't he just get a straight answer. But he sat down on the log, closing his eyes and breathing deeply, trying to organize his thoughts. Well, he….

_Oh by the Force…._

Luke opened his eyes, and whirled on Obi-Wan, who smiled sadly, nodding his head. "That's right, Luke. _Leia _is your sister."

And it made sense, really. Somehow, deep inside, he'd always known, known why he'd always had that strange, beautiful connection to her. Why he'd loved her so desperately. Why-

_Wait just a second._

"Oh my God!" he cried with a sudden panic in his voice. "I've been having fantasies about my sister! _Aaagh!_"

At this point, Obi-Wan burst out laughing and practically fell off the log while Luke launched himself off of it, running about like a chicken with its head cut off before finding a nice tree to smack his head against. "Oh, that is so, so wrong! Arrrrrgh…."

Obi-Wan clutched his side as he pulled himself back up onto the log, gently patronizing, "Luke, please, your skull isn't meant to strike trees that many times."

Luke pounced on his mentor quickly enough, boiling with disgust and a little rage. "How _dare _you not tell me four years ago! Obi-Wan, you-"

"Now hold on a second!" the ghost cried, putting up his hands and motioning his charge back onto the log. Luke did so, cradling his sore head in his hands. Oh, this was _so _unfair. "Four years ago, I would remind you, you never went right out and said in front of me, 'I'm in love with Leia Organa.' I suspected something, but before I had a chance to truly analyze it, I was, well….dead."

"And after that?" Luke snarled.

"Qui-Gon and I had a pot going to see how long it would take you to figure it out."

"Who the hell is Qui-Gon!"

"Now, Luke, listen to me," soothed Obi-Wan, a note in his voice instinctually making Luke look up at him. And he looked so…hurt. So desperate and confused and very, very unhappy. Obi-Wan smiled sadly at him, heart breaking slightly for the boy. "Oh, there now…." He scolded and comforted all at once, stroking the boy's hair back before Luke finally just reached out to him, craving the reassurance of being cradled in his arms for a moment. "There, there, now, why such a fuss?"

"I can't do it, Obi-Wan. I can't kill my father, and Leia…Oh, Force, Leia….She'll never forgive _any _of this."

"Stop that talk. It will turn out all right."

"How can you _say_ that!" Luke cried, pulling away again. "Leia _despises _my…_our _father. And he'll…he'll….Oh, God, if he ever finds out, then she's…Oh, Master Obi-Wan…."

"When your father turned, Luke," Obi-Wan was patiently saying, "he did not know your mother was pregnant. And certainly not with twins. Senator Organa took her to be his daughter on Alderaan, and you, well, you were destined for Tatooine."

"Those people we saw the day I turned…_They _were my aunt and uncle."

"You know that, do you?"

"An old friend told me. But what happened, Obi-Wan? Why didn't I get to Tatooine."

"You and I were aboard a transport ship headed there, escaping Alderaan where we'd manage to hide you with your mother for a year. You were only a twelve month old baby…." Obi-Wan smiled softly, looking at him with quite a lot of love. "Force, you were so little then! Well…the transport was attacked. More appropriately, it stumbled across an Imperial vessel, and accidentally started firing on it. Your father was on board, and Force knows for whatever reason, boarded the vessel. He and I fought, and I was stunned by Storm Troopers. He…managed to figure out who was your mother, and was in a rage to know who she had betrayed him with. That's why he took you. And, well….he found out. And he made you his son in every way. As for me, I managed to escape, but there was no way I could get you out without getting caught all over again. There was nothing for me to do but continue on to Tatooine. Alone. And that's why I failed."

"But you made me a Jedi, Obi-Wan. No matter how it happened, I turned."

"Yes, Luke, you turned. But at such a price! I…I promised your mother I would protect you, and I wish to the gods every day that I could have done a better job. But, well…." He laughed as best he could. "Things haven't turned out so bad, have they?"

Luke shook his head. "I became my father's son in everyway….Save that the Force wouldn't let me stay a Sith…." Luke gulped, stared at the ground. "And my mother died on Alderaan."

"Yes, your mother died on Alderaan. Bail took her with him when he adopted Leia, mostly because it was blatantly clear that she didn't have much time left, and to deprive a mother of all of her children was…far too cruel." Obi-Wan looked up into the foggy night for a moment, shaking his head. "We've all paid a price for Anakin's fall. And maybe you the heaviest price of all."

"Obi-Wan," Luke whispered, looking up at him. "I can save him, I know I can."

"Luke, you cannot save the galaxy. Maybe you can't even save yourself. Why are you so sure you can save him?"

"Because…because I do love him, he _is _my father. Yes, he's evil, but he loves me, too! I've always known it, I knew it for the seventeen years he raised me. He will not kill me, he loves me still. He always will." He looked long and hard at his master, taking in a deep breath. "Where do I go from here, Obi-Wan? Where do I go from here?"

Obi-Wan shook his head. "Where does your heart say?"

Luke swallowed, thought for a moment. "It says to go home. I just need to find home."

"Do you? Do you really? Because I think you've known all along."

Luke looked at him for a moment, nodded, sighed, and said, "Stay with me, Obi-Wan." He got up, ringing his hands. "Force knows I'll need courage to do this. I don't know if I have that courage."

"You do. You always have. And I _will _be with you."

Luke smiled, nodded, and watched his mentor slowly fade from view in the cool night air.

But Luke wasn't alone.

**To Be Continued…**

_Yes, you were all right all along. Leia was, in fact, Luke's sister. Drove ya crazy, didn't I? Mhmh, I thought so. I really liked this chapter just for the emotional value, but I think it's a little unbalanced and uneven. Hope you all enjoyed it anyway._

Stephanie C: No, no more dream visions for Lukie. At least, I don't think so. Not now that he's basically in accordance with his other self and he knows all about it and the Force has him on the right track. Yesh. Be careful, Yoda didn't say, "There is another," he said that he wasn't the only one. Is there more than Leia? Hmmm, I wonder….


	47. Part 3 Chapter 4

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Three**

**Chapter Four**

"There's still no response from any of the Jedi. And the holonet says that some senators were assassinated for plotting against…Emperor," the word was said bitterly, "Palpatine."

_I know that voice. I heard it a long time ago…._

"Plotting against. Sure."

_Obi-Wan…._

He was in a bright room, entirely white. He gathered they were in a ship, but what and whose he did not know. There was a reasonably sized rectangular table, at the head of which sat Master Yoda. But Master Yoda was dead….

_"Through the Force other places you see. The future…the past…."_

He was seeing the past.

Luke looked on, slowly gathering that all the occupants of the room were dead. How far back was this past? Not so far, but before he was born.

The first voice had been the man seated at Yoda's right, Bail Organa, Senator and Viceroy to Alderaan. At least, he had been, before it became powder. In the corner was the second speaker, the Master Obi-Wan he'd seen fight his father at Mustafar, and looking terribly dejected. Slightly worse for wear, Luke was sure this was after the fight, but not that far after. And seated on Yoda's left was….

Luke's beautiful mother.

She had obviously been crying, and if she wasn't now, she was only barely winning the battle to stay that way. He made a slow beeline for her, wanting to touch her hair and bend down to be on eye level with her. The latter he did. The previous he didn't dare.

"There, now, it's alright," he whispered.

_She misses my father…_

"Please don't cry."

But she didn't hear him. Nobody could hear him.

_I cannot change the past._

"Hm, distressing, this is," Yoda agreed sadly, shaking his head. Luke noted he didn't really look younger. Healthier than in his last moments, but he doubted twenty three years made too much of a difference. He now turned in his chair, and Padmè wiped fiercely at her eyes, hating to lose face in front of the Jedi Master. "Of the children, Lord Vader knows?"

Luke stood up to relieve the pent tension in his knees, still staring down at his mother.

_Oh, Force, she's pregnant with me and…and Leia…._

The senator of Naboo shook her head, eyes still puffy and red. "I…I never got the chance to tell him."

"Unexpected, this is," sighed Yoda, and Organa reached a hand across the table to cover Amidala's with, trying to be comforting.

"What are you going to do, Master Yoda?" Organa asked, gaze flickering in the Jedi's direction.

"Hmm. Separated they must be, for their own protection."

"But Master Yoda, you can't just-"

"Of them the emperor must never know," and Padmè had to agree with that.

"Master Yoda," entered Obi-Wan softly, "if I might suggest….Separating new born babies is understandable in the situation, but… But the birth is less than seven months away. And surely…surely it would benefit both Senator Amidala and her children to be able to care for them for…at least a little while."

"Well and good this is, Master Obi-Wan," Yoda rebuffed slightly, "but where suggest you do we hide the senator until then, hm?"

"Alderaan," piped in Organa. "I give you free use of Alderaan, Padmè."

They shared a look, a thanking smile. Organa was a good person, he always had been….

"Dangerous this is, Senator Organa."

"We accept the risk."

"Master Obi-Wan," Yoda turned his chair back in the direction of the only other surviving Jedi. "How long think you necessary before leave their mother, the children can?"

Obi-Wan hesitated a moment, arms behind his back as he shifted his weight on the balls of his feet. "…A year?"

"A year is never enough time for children to be separated from their mother!"

"But all the time there is to spare, Senator," Yoda slightly snapped back at her. "Good, a year is. Yes, good…." He fell to silent contemplation, and Organa rose, going over to help Padmè out of her seat, causing Luke to instinctively back up. Not that it mattered. Organa could have put his hand right through him and not have noticed.

"Come on, Padmè," he whispered, helping her out of her chair. "Let's get you checked out by the med droid."

They walked toward the door, passing by Obi-Wan when Padmè paused. "Obi-Wan, I…." She stopped there. There was something she wanted to say, but she didn't know how to say it.

Obi-Wan merely nodded, and smiled painfully at her. "Well….I…." he tried to respond. "I tried my best, Padmè. I should have done better. But that was all I could do."

"I'm sorry."

"And so am I."

"Well."

And Bail took her along to the med droid after that. After a long moment, Obi-Wan sat down next to Yoda, and finally whispered, "HD-02 says that the twins are a boy and a girl. Padmè's already reluctantly picking out names."

"Miss her husband, she does."

"…Yes, Master Yoda."

"Broke the Code, young Skywalker did. Betrayed us all, he has."

"I…yes, I know."

"Hmmm…." Yoda hummed again, a living breathing testimony to disappointment and shattered hopes. "The Chosen One," he muttered slightly contemptuously.

"Master….What shall we do with the children once they're a year old?"

"Separate them, as I said."

"Yes, but….but where?"

"Senator Organa will take one. A daughter has he wanted."

"He will? But…but…Anakin's son?"

"Sense something of him, do you?"

Luke carefully slid into the seat next to Obi-Wan, watching the proceedings with painful interest.

"Yes, I…I'm not quite sure how to explain it."

"Sensed it I have too. Hm. To Tatooine, shall he go."

"Tatooine?" he cried, surprised. "But Anakin was born there, he-"

"Exactly. The last place Lord Vader should ever want to return, or think to look should he discover the existence of the twins, yes?"

"I do see your point."

"And family has our new Skywalker there. An aunt and uncle, yes?"

"Step-uncle, yes. Oh, it would be a good idea to raise him among family. Padmè would appreciate it. And what should we do with Padmè?"

"Sick our Senator Amidala is becoming. Very sick."

"Not sick enough to affect the children."

"No. Not yet. But too sick to live, she will become."

"I….have sensed something like that, yes…."

"On Alderaan shall she stay, until one with the Force she becomes."

"I…I suppose that's best, isn't it?"

Yoda gave Obi-Wan a hard look, and it was a gaze Obi-Wan could not meet. "Regret, you do, young Anakin's fall."

"Of course I do! Master, I…." he shook his head, giving up with a sigh. "I did love that boy. And I am sorry that I failed him."

"Hm," Yoda nodded. "Beyond these emotions you must rise."

"I know," he whispered forlornly, and Luke remembered their conversation that evening.

_You didn't fail, Obi-Wan. Whatever you may say about it, you didn't fail._

"The young one you must protect now."

"With my life," he pledged, and Luke shivered, knowing how true those words were. Oh, dear Force, it wasn't fair….

"Of the children Lord Vader must never know."

"No."

"Good. Rest you should, now, Obi-Wan. Yes, rest. So shall I."

_Of the children he must never know…_

Everything around Luke grew dark and hazy, and he began to fight the growing darkness a bit, gulping in no small terror.

_He knows me. All too well._

The voices of Yoda and Obi-Wan faded, and Luke felt himself falling out of his vision and back into the world of the real and the tangible, unsure of what lay ahead…

_I won't let him have Leia._

…

Luke woke up to R2D2's persistent beeping, and he groggily opened one eye. He pushed his rag tag emergency blanket off of him, stretching and working muscles sore from sleeping a night on the ground. To have slept in the dead Jedi master's hut would have been wrong, and to continue directly on to Sullust in his state of mind unthinkable. The solution had been to crawl under a ratty sheet stuffed in his X-Wing for emergencies of some kind, and sleep.

And dream.

His poor, poor mother….

His father had never known. But why he turned nobody had explained. Only his father himself could say why.

_And will I ask him? I don't know. If I must face him…and I must face him…_

Luke began getting things ready for take off in the gloom of a Dagobah dawn, slow resolve creeping into his senses.

_I will find the answers._

**To Be Continued…**

_I was kinda looking foreword to this chapter. Didn't turn out like I'd hoped. Drat. Oh well. It's still pretty decent._

Schnickledooger: XD! Ahm, yes, well, the Paddy-girl line got me. Anyway, hope you do enjoy. I personally liked the whole bet with Qui-Gon thing myself.


	48. Part 3 Chapter 5

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Three**

**Chapter Five **

He'd actually been hiding his presence for quite some time, standing there, absorbing the occupants of the room. Tension, excitement, a twinge of fear swiftly crushed by a sense of honor. They sat rapt, listening as Mon Mothma and Admiral Ackbar and General Madine all finish the run down of the basic idea of why they were headed to Endor.

It was a crazy idea. But it had to work.

Everyone was here, really. The other leaders of the Rebellion were standing behind the speaker, eyes closed, nodding, maybe praying, probably thinking. Squadron leaders, intelligence officials – Oh, there was Wedge! And Lando, and Chewie, and everyone else. Everyone was here.

Leia was here.

Strange, he found that…he didn't regret any of it any more than he already had. He wasn't more depressed because there was nothing more to be depressed about. He'd already given Leia up long before now. The fact she was his sister really changed nothing. Well, no, it changed everything. But not this.

He already had to swallow hard when he looked at her. He already had given up any sort of dream and let her run to Solo when she was in a rare mood to be romantic. There was nothing more to lose, nothing more to gain.

Things were different. But not this.

He still loved her, and he always would. Well, maybe not like _that_, especially not like that, not anymore. But he'd already known that. She was still his dearest friend and he loved her and-

He had to get off this topic.

"General Solo, is your strike team assembled?"

Strike team? Luke raised an eyebrow, shifting his weight against the door, slowly working his presence back into the room. He was in no hurry to be seen yet, but he felt the opportunity of best advantage would be soon.

"Uh, my team's ready, I don't have a command crew for the shuttle."

Chewie rumbled, and Han smiled weakly at him. "Well, it's going to be rough, pal. I didn't want to speak for you. That's one."

"Uh, General? Count me in."

Luke let the façade drop, looking happy and somehow somber all in the same moment as he called, "I'm with you, too!"

Heads turned briefly in his directions, almost surprised they hadn't heard him coming. But that was nothing new. Leia was grinning, and they rushed to embrace each other as the meeting now began breaking up. He held her at arm's length for a moment, smiling sadly, his blue eyes flickering against the bright whiteness of the room.

Leia blinked, puzzled for a moment by the expression on his face. It was sad, but that didn't really cover it. It was both less and more all in a moment.

He'd never looked at her that way before.

And yet she knew it wasn't with any sort of romantic intention, and squeezed his arms lightly, asking, "What's wrong."

He kept up that melancholy smile, briefly cupping her face in his hands. "Nothing. Nothing at all. Never again."

"Luke-"

"Luke!" Han had clapped him on the back, and he turned, grinning to the smuggler. But his eyes still looked so…heavy. Like he was carrying some massive burden on his shoulders and in his eyes.

"Hi, Han," he whispered. He seemed unable to speak above a whisper, not withstanding his briefly raised voice a moment before. "Chewie," he nodded with a smile.

"What you been up to?"

"Nothing, I suppose. Just look at you, General Solo. Who would have guessed four years ago?"

"We wouldn't have guessed a lot of things four years ago."

Luke paused, swallowed, nodded. "No. I don't suppose we would have."

…

"I've got the transport ship all started up, where's Han?"

"Talking with Lando," Leia responded, idly pulling on her camouflage robe.

"Talking with Lando?" Luke responded, sprawled indolently in the pilot's seat. He was used to these kinds of ships, had even been allowed to fly them on rare occasions between the _Executor _and wherever he had to take them. Not the nicest of things, nor his personal choice, but they served their purpose. Initially, there'd been talk of letting him fly it, but he and Han both agreed it was unwise. Han wasn't exactly a nobody in the Rebellion, but he could make it much harder to be noticed by an Imperial Officer than Luke ever could. "What for?"

"_The Falcon_," she explained, handing him his pullover. He wriggled into it, yanking it over his head.

He stared at her for a moment before his eyes went wide. "He's not."

"He's not what?"

"Letting Lando take _The Falcon_."

"Well, I suppose he is. That's what it sounded like."

Luke stared, jaw agape. "You're kidding!"

"No, why would I be?"

"Han hates when anyone so much as touches her."

"Well he can't use her today. And she was Lando's ship originally…."

Luke closed his jaw, staring off and shaking his head, trying to comprehend it.

_No, we wouldn't expect some things four years earlier._

Han came up the ramp, looking very much more down to earth than in his normal moods. "You got her all warmed up?" he grunted, and Luke stepped out of the chair.

"Yeah, she's coming up."

"Alright, then." Chewie was taking his seat as co-pilot, grumbling. "No, I don't think the Empire had Wookies in mind when they designed her, Chewie."

…

"Now we find out if that code is worth the price we paid."

Leia shot Luke a worried glance, and he grimaced, shrugging. All the codes had been switched around. It hadn't taken too many people to realize or piece together or whatever that only someone deep inside the Empire could use the security codes Luke had used to sneak his way into Coruscant.

A few people privately thought that the former Imperial Prince _might _have had something to do with it.

New codes were going up most everyplace, though he was given to understand many were still the same. But not with the second Death Star. They were taking absolutely no chances this time, and Luke really couldn't blame them. When Han had transferred the code, it had left Luke completely baffled that they'd even come up with something like that.

He knew better than anybody – the Empire left nothing to chance.

"It'll work," Han reassured, almost more for himself than for anybody else. "It'll work."

The Super Star Destroyer they'd commed slunk by them as they made their slow way dancing in wait for the shield to be taken down. There was a sudden feeling of fleeting cold about Luke, giving way to a familiar emotion with no sort of temperature at all. He quivered, sank in his seat, and immediately recognized _The Executor_.

_Oh Force…_

He sucked in a shaky breath and whispered, "Vader's on that ship."

Han stoutly denied that, but Luke didn't know what he said, as he wasn't really listening. His eyes were drawn to the ship below, entranced. His father's presence called to him, enticed him, the way it hadn't done since he was Imperial Prince.

He loved his father. He was pulled to him. And he knew quite well that such a feeling was very dangerous.

"I'm endangering the mission," he murmured more to himself than anyone else. "I shouldn't have come."

Leia took his hand and he glanced up at her, gulping, eyes wide. And for a fleeting second, she had to agree with his assessment of the situation.

For a fleeting second…had she felt it?

_I have got to keep her away from him._

And Luke didn't know whether he could or should stay or go, was right or wrong. But they were suddenly given clearance, and there was nothing, for the moment, to do but go. And so they went. And Luke was shaking in his boots.

If he'd felt Vader, Vader had felt him. There was no mistake about that.

…

"Should we try and go around?"

Great. They didn't have any time, and there were troopers standing right in their path. Tons of Rebel soldiers, enough of them high ranking to make it a very proud catch, and they _couldn't move_. Luke pressed his back against the log, eyes shut tight, trying to remain calm with the breath he drew.

"It'll take time. This whole party will be for nothing if they see us."

"That's for sure," Luke agreed with Han, slowly flipping over to see the troops.

"Chewie and I will take care of this. You stay here."

Luke and Leia looked sharply in his direction, certain he was crazy. But there was no stopping Han once he got an idea into his head, and all Luke could think to say was, "Quietly! There might be more of them out there." In fact, he was _sure _there were more of them out there.

"Hey," he grinned with a shrug. "It's me!"

And off he dashed, leaving the other two to share a look of extreme reprehension. "That's exactly what I'm afraid of."

**To Be Continued…**

_Urgh, my internet broke down so it's taken FOREVER to finally get this chapter up. I like the beginning, but the rest isn't quite what I had in mind. Oh well._

Tap Dancing Widow: Yeah, it's not terribly fair, is it?

Snowgurl54: Thank you.

Stephanie C: Oh, don't worry, I'll explain that!

Spirit White: Oh, thank you so much That's all so kind.

Schnickledooger: The first one I'd written before hand and didn't have time to post. The other two I wrote that day.

Madame Naberrie: No, it's okay, I was hoping people'd get a big laugh out of that.

Meresger: Oh, did he? I was trying to go for detached. But thank you very much, I really appreciate the criticism. It helps me work the next time I have to do that sort of thing.

Jedi X-man Serena Kenobi: Thank you.

denique: Thank you


	49. Part 3 Chapter 6

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Three**

**Chapter Six**

There had to be a bump on his head from the fall he'd taken, and a least one bruise. Either way, he was tired when he finally tromped back into the clearing the rest of the Rebels were hiding in. Han stepped from behind a tree, quickly lowering his blaster. Slightly relieved to see him, he cried, "Luke!" And then after a frightening few seconds, "Where's Leia?"

If ever a question could make his blood run cold, that one could do it. He gulped, and said, "What, she didn't come back?"

"I thought she was with you," Han held slightly accusingly, but Luke was too tired and worried to rise to the bait.

Leia. Alone. Out there. In a forest she didn't know. Surrounded by Imperials.

The…The _daughter _of Darth Vader, however unknowingly, was out there. And Luke wasn't with her, and when it came to big shot Imperials, well….Luke was the only one who could protect her.

Were she to come within an inch of their father…Or were he to even let it slip for a moment! The consequences….Oh dear God….

"We got separated," he whimpered, wanting to tremble, instead trying to think. "Hey, we better go look for her." Han shot him a look that read, "Well, no, do you think?" but Luke ignored him. He had neither the time for the patience for this. Not right now….

…

Vader was rushing with his customarily long stride down the hall of the second Death Star, in quite a state. There was no mistaking it. He may not have been anywhere remotely near Luke for six months, but that glittering presence in the Force was always unmistakable to the father.

It was his greatest joy and sorrow in the entire world. Nothing outstripped the love and pain he felt for Luke. Nothing.

He stormed toward the emperor's makeshift throne room, still in control, but heart wildly panging in his chest. He had brushed very near Luke and he would not let him escape. He'd waited four years and while Emperor Palpatine was busy enjoying his soon to be victory over the Rebel Alliance, Vader was far more impatient to get his son back.

The two purposes could be multi-useful. Taking their prized Rogue Squadron pilot, Hero of Yavin IV, and Jedi Knight away from the Alliance would be a major blow in morale and in more material matters. Luke as a Sith would be even more powerful than he'd been before, if that was even possible (and the idea thrilled Vader to his core). And Luke was as filled with useful secrets against the Alliance for the Empire in the same way he'd been against the Empire and for the Alliance. So, really, all of this was justifiable to his master in many ways.

But Palpatine wasn't stupid. He knew he loved that boy. And maybe he didn't understand the emotion, or particularly like it, but he could twist it to his own purposes. He had for twenty one years.

And that was why Vader was not in the mood for games when two of the emperor's elite Red Guard stopped him at the elevator door.

"Halt! The emperor does not wish to be disturbed at the moment."

Vader really didn't like the Red Guard.

He raised his hand, implying a little manipulation and a lot of strangulation, snarling, "The emperor will see me, now!"

"The emperor will see you, now," was the choked reply, and the Dark Lord of the Sith released the man with little patience, sweeping into the elevator and pausing a few moments until it took him up and opened its doors. He swept into the room, kneeled for a brief few seconds to his master – sitting in a chair with his back to him – and rose again.

"I told you to remain on the command ship."

He was clearly irritated, and for several reasons. He was slightly impatient to be rid of the thorn in his side known as the Rebellion, and this business over his Hand was starting to irk him a bit. Mara had been off for two and a half years now, doing some private training or something of the sort, and Palpatine had approved. Initially, anyway. But now it was just getting bothersome, and while she dashed back to the Core as soon as her master called, she was obviously distracted. The emperor had just sent her on some mission and she had failed miserably. What it was Vader had not been allowed to know, and it made him feel it was something he wouldn't like, and made him want to know all the more desperately.

So neither one of the important, impatient men were in very good moods.

"A small Rebel force has penetrated the shield and landed on Endor," he said very carefully, managing to sound as submissive as possible.

Palpatine wheeled slowly around, but Vader registered no shock or surprise of any kind. Not that that was so strange. "Yes, I know," he replied smoothly, waving a wrinkled hand slightly.

Vader hesitated. "My _son_ is with them."

And Palpatine did not miss the inflection in the voice. Oh yes, Vader still loved that boy, he noted with narrowed eyes.

Only Luke wasn't a boy anymore and he obviously wasn't going to be terribly easy to manipulate.

"Are you sure?" he asked very coolly, still watching his Right Hand extremely carefully while the Sith shifted from foot to foot.

"I have felt him, my master."

"Strange that I have not."

It was a comment meant to make him bristle, and bristle he did. Really so strange? No, not at all. What sire shared with son was incomparable, Palpatine had never had anything like that, and nor did he want it.

"I wonder, Lord Vader," he was continuing smoothly, turning the chair slightly so that he was now in profile to the Dark Lord, "if your feelings on this matter are clear."

And there his heart trembled again. Oh, yes, they had to be clear…Luke was not his son until he bent the knee and called him father…He could not love him, miss him, need him, want him, until then.

So why did he?

"They are clear, my master," Vader insisted, still quiet enough to be suppliant.

"Then you must go to the Sanctuary Moon and wait for him." The emperor's yellow eyes flickered in his direction, and Vader felt himself falter slightly.

"He will come to me?" he choked, trembling at the intense excitement the moment offered, the brief ray of glorious hope.

And Vader couldn't help but love the boy. He was too weak to stop such a strong feeling.

"I have foreseen it," Palpatine snapped now more quickly, his patience for the conversation worn out. "His compassion for you will be his undoing. He will come to you and then you will bring him before me."

This time Vader deeply bowed, in a slight daze. "As you wish." And with that, he left the throne room.

_His compassion for me?_

Why did he love him so much, even now, after four years without him? Especially after four years without him! Absence made his weak heart grow all the fonder, and the memory of his shinning light did not fade, as so many a beloved memory he'd shoved away had, but grew stronger and sweeter with each passing moment.

The promise of the idea thrilled him.

_His compassion for me…._

He stepped out of the elevator, past the guard he'd choked not too long ago, and walked on, not noticing his surroundings anymore than the first time.

_I am coming for you, Luke._

…

"Leia!"

Han and Luke had cried it at the exact same time, smitten with the image of the princess, long hair combed straight and glinting in the light of the pale torches that flickered against the night.

And Luke had to quickly remind himself that she was his sister.

And that was an odd thought indeed.

She'd started to rush to them, but the Ewoks blocked her, spears raised.

"Your Royal Highness!" Threepio cried from his dais, raising a robotic arm.

"But these are my friends!" No go, and she glanced first earnestly at Luke tied to the pole and then Han slung over the spit before her gaze rested on the protocol droid. "Threepio, tell them they must be set free."

Threepio tried, but to no avail, and Han sarcastically commented as more wood was laid around his pyre, "Somehow, I got the feeling that didn't help us much."

But Luke had switched gears quite smoothly now, and effortlessly ordered in a calm, controlling voice, "Threepio, tell them if they don't do as you wish, you will become angry and use your magic."

"But Master Luke, what magic? I couldn't possibly-"

"_Just_…tell them," he cut off, his pale blue eyes flashing.

Threepio conceded, but the Ewoks did not. No dice. Threepio was whining again, but Luke wasn't listening. His eyes were closed, and he focused calmly and carefully, and….

There were cries of astonishment, and Threepio was at his wits end. Someone was cutting his bonds, and Luke opened his eyes, a grin spreading across his features as he slowly lowered the droid. Han was given the same courtesy, and Luke was able to enfold Leia in a relieved, protecting embrace before relinquishing her to Han.

She was safe, he breathed, feeling the tension from before ease….Thank the Force she was safe….

He wrapped an arm around her shoulders again, heaving a sigh. "Thanks, Threepio."

"I never knew I had it in me…"

Luke glanced at the woman tucked under his arm, and his heart beat sped up. Maybe it was dogged determination, or maybe the Force was for once being merciful and lending a hand, but he was finding it easier and easier to think of her as his sister instead of the love he'd lost. Or never really had to begin with.

She loved him. Just not the way he hoped.

His heart sped up at the excitement of the idea of family. And Leia was safe.

Now if he could only keep her that way.

**To Be Continued….**

_Omg! This chapter was soooooo much fun to do! Especially the Vader Palpatine stuff. Wow. I loved this chapter. But all this updating is not helping my goal of finishing in February. Oh well._

_You know, if any artistically talented people out there wanted to make me fanart, I'd be okay with that. I really would. And there's my shameless plug for the evening._

Stephanie C: Oh, really? Good I'd hate for it to get boring.

madame naberrie: That's okay, you don't have to log on. I'm glad you liked it, I'm trying to work on the new Luke Leia dynamics. Because they're going to have to change at least a little.


	50. Part 3 Chapter 7

**Where Am I Going To**

**Part Three**

**Chapter Seven**

He'd slipped into the cool night air, taking a deep breath of it. It smelled…clean. Well, no, it didn't, it smelled organic. Yes, that was the right word for it. It smelled natural, and he liked that. He didn't have a lot of memories connected to such a scent.

So he thought he might remember this one.

_"Oh, but, Luke, you were the Imperial Prince. You must have lived in dozens of fascinating and interesting places."_

_"That's exactly the problem. There were dozens."_

A breeze picked up and he shivered slightly, opening his eyes to the dark of the night and looking irresistibly up at the sky. Dozens of places, wherever his father was called.

Luke paused. He saw it. And he trembled.

The second Death Star. Why did they do it? Why did they think it was a good idea? He remembered how his father had argued about the construction of the first one and how thoroughly Palpatine had shot him down. He must have argued over another one. But the Empire rarely made the same mistake twice, he knew that much. They were all going to have to be very careful…

Luke just watched the Death Star. But his father wasn't there. No, he was much closer….

"Luke, what's wrong?"

He froze, back turned to the voice. Something in him trembled, and he looked down again, eyes shut tightly.

It had to be now. He knew it had to be now. It all had to be right now, there was no other time.

_I could die there…._

Which was why he had to tell her now.

He very slowly wheeled, trying to smile, his eyes offsetting it. There stood Leia, hair shimmering in the starlight and flickering torches, and Luke was so very tempted to embrace her because he was so afraid…But fear was something he was going to have to get over. The wordless, soundless language that was the Force replied that he must face his fears.

_But will I come out conquering them or them me?_

You will not know, he was told, he felt, until you try.

He smiled a touch wider now, motioning her closer and leaning against the wood piling taking another lungful of the totally natural air. "Leia," he said softly, "do you remember your mother? Your _real _mother?"

Leia blinked, leaning next to him, close enough to keep the night chill a little off, and he gently and unobtrusively put his arm around her shoulder. "Just a bit. She died when I was very young."

He remembered all those nights of pestering and pestering and pestering his father and getting nothing. Absolutely nothing. He remembered the frustration and the anger and the heartache and the desperate wish that he could have known her once, just _once_, and that he never would. The feeling had never dissipated. It never would.

"What do you remember?" he whispered in the dark.

She glanced up at him. "Just…images, really. Feelings."

"Tell me," he insisted.

"She was very beautiful. Kind, but…sad." He released her, standing up and sort of staring off into the fog. She stood now, too. "Why are you asking me this?"

He rubbed at his shoulders, a nervous habit he never had been able to drop. "I have no memory of my mother….I never knew her…"

"Yes, I know," Leia replied, confused. "But what does that have to do with any-"

"But I've seen her," he replied, wheeling, eyes taking on a slightly inhuman glow. "Oh, I've seen her."

"What are you talking about, Luke?"

"In dreams. She was the most beautiful woman in the world, I really believe that."

Leia paused a moment before walking closer to him, brushing hair out of his eyes. "Luke, tell me," she gently commanded, not the way she'd commanded him when he'd lost the will to live after Yavin IV and not the way she'd commanded him to move aside as he tried desperately to keep her from going to Black Sun. This was different. "What's troubling you?"

His eyes were drawn to hers, and he whispered, "Vader's here. On this moon."

Leia blinked, startled. "You can't mean that."

"Of course I can. I cannot have been raised by him for seventeen years and not know."

"Seventeen? Luke, what are you talking about?"

He gripped her by her elbows, holding her out a bit, trying to breath and failing miserably. Courage…. "You'll understand it someday."

She laughed slightly. "I'm sure I won't. I never understand your sort of things."

"But you will," he drew her close again, trying to comprehend it all. "I promise."

"Luke, I think you're tired. Maybe you should go and get some rest….."

"No, I'm not tired….I feel fine. I feel afraid, but I feel fine."

"Afraid?" she pushed away. "Why? What are you afraid of."

A tremor ran through him for a moment, and he paused, trying to comprehend it. "Dying." She blinked up at him, astounded. "Just a little. Not enough that I won't do it – I _must _do it – but I am afraid."

"Luke, what-"

"Make me a promise," he begged. "If…If I don't come back-"

"Come back? What are you saying!"

"-you've got to go to Tatooine. Remember all those old books I was looking through when we were there to rescue Han? Yes, Obi-Wan's old books. They'll tell you everything, everything you'll need to know." He held her close to him again, and Leia could feel him tremble, even though she couldn't understand it. "And I'll still be with you. Even if they turn me, something…something in me will never let you go."

"Luke!" she finally broke free. "What are you talking about?"

He gulped, opened his mouth, closed it again. "You're Force Sensitive too, Leia."

She now reeled in muted shock. "What?" she whispered hoarsely. "I'm what?"

"I don't suppose I should have been so surprised," Luke was continuing, now pacing with his hands crossed behind him. "I had suspicions after Bespin, but nothing was ever conclusive enough to…But, it doesn't matter. Obi-Wan told me, and now I know everything. Well, not everything, but enough for now. I will learn more, presently…"

Leia collapsed against the railing again, mind doing somersaults as she tried to grasp the idea. "But…how is this even possible."

"Oh, it's not so difficult, once you stop and think about it," he spoke softly, now stopping to take her hands in his. "You see, my father is very powerful in the Force. So am I. It follows, therefore, that…my sister would be, too…."

Leia's jaw dropped now, and she stared up at him, eyes wide, trying to comprehend it. "What did you say?" she murmured in the dark, and he swallowed, looking down at her with sad, pitying blue eyes.

"Oh, Leia," he whispered, "if I could protect you from the awful truth for the rest of your life, I would, but there it is…It's bound to be much worse for you, I'm sure, you haven't had seventeen years to…come to understand the idea. Even love him for it."

She bolted, standing several feet away from him, shivering, and it somehow hurt him to see that. "It can't be true. It isn't."

"It is," he whispered, eyes looking misty in the dark night as they sort of faced off. "You are my twin sister, Leia," he closed his eyes now, imploring her. "_Think_, you do know!" He opened his arms to her, and she remained frozen, slowly realizing within herself that he had to be right. And after that followed her rushing into his embrace, Luke's arms surrounding her tightly, refusing to let go.

"I'll never love him," she whispered fiercely through a rush of tears. "I can't, please don't ask me to!"

"Sh, alright…" he whispered, rocking her in his arms and petting her hair. "I'll do the loving for us."

"How can you, though? After everything, after four years, after all of it! How can you still love him so much?"

"He's our father, Leia. And he does love me."

"Maybe he's your father, he isn't mine."

"Stop that," he ordered gently. "That won't help, it never does. He is your father, whether you want it or not, and I am your brother. You were," he laughed jokingly, "the Imperial Princess."

"I never will be," she almost growled, still hanging onto him. "Never. I _refuse_."

"Alright, that's fine. I can accept that…I had to tell you, because…" He was choking now, fighting back tears that were winning the battle, "in case…In case I didn't come back…"

"Luke, no!" she cried, looking up at him now. He looked down at her, brushing away a gossamer tear. "Now more than ever, I will not let you go."

"I have to, Leia. He's our father, I can save him."

"How do you know that?"

"I don't know."

"Well, I need to know! I need to know," she insisted.

He sighed, shaking his head grimly. "Because there is good in him, I've felt it. He will not turn me over to the Emperor and he will not kill me. Because he can't do it. We are too connected, we are too much a part of each other. I've known that my whole life, and four years without him cannot change that."

"I won't let you go," she cried, holding onto him tightly.

He held her as close as he could, so torn, so certain… "If I don't go, everything we've fought for will be for nothing. If I don't go, I'll never be able to look at myself ever again. If I don't go….It will never stop."

"I don't want to lose you," she whispered.

"You never will," he softly replied. "I am with you, and I always will be. Hang onto that, Leia. That's a promise. That you can keep forever."

She very reluctantly let him go now, and they stood there for a moment, just watching each other. He swallowed boldly, silently communicating his love and respect and lost wishes, before he reluctantly brushed past her, walking down the path, disappearing into the night fog.

To what he went he did not know. But he had to do it, and that was all.

**To Be Continued…**

_From here on out, this whole thing is gonna be UBER fun. Man, I'm excited. I made it into our school musical, so that eats up a bunch of time. So, maybe I can make this fic last a whole year, who knows. And, also, check it out! Our fiftieth chapter! Whoot!_

Stephanie C: Isn't he just a jerk? Don't worry, she's coming back soon.

Jedi X-man Serena Kenobi: XD! Yes, must agree. According to my handy dandy scripty thingy, it was a cut scene. Poor Red Guard. Thus their non-speaking-ness was forever immortalized.

Spirit White: Oh, thank you so much

denique: Well, I do try….

Madame Naberrie: I was a little unsure about this chapter, but I think it came out okay….

Relyan: You know….that's really an excellent question. One I don't have an answer for. I think the only excuse I have it, "Everyone else does it!" But really, I don't know. Because I hate calling him Luke Vader? Very perceptive of you….

Oh, glad you liked the desert thing

Tap Dancing Widow: I don't know. I'm really hoping twenty. I'll be lucky at this point if I stretch it to fifteen. But we'll see what I can do.

Asrayu: Oh, sorry to keep you up! Thank you very much I did a good job on the prologue. Yeah….I myself do mock that random switch rather mercilessly at time….I tried to explain it as best I could…I dunno, something I'll have to work on. Pimpernel fan! Yeah! Many hearts for you! Welcome to the fic

tasuja: Oh, sorry, but I can't. It would throw a total wrench into everything else at this point. As it is, Luke will have missed the infant years by now anyway. The kid and/or kids would be about two by now, so it's a little late…. But thank you for your interest, glad you like the fic


	51. Part 3 Chapter 8

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Three**

**Chapter Eight**

_There was a time_

_Our happiness seemed never ending_

_I was so sure_

_That where we were heading was right_

_Life was a road_

_So certain and straight and unbending_

_Our little road_

_With never a crossroad in sight_

_Back in the days_

_When we spoke in civilized voices_

_Women in black, and sturdy young men at the oar_

_Back in the days when I let you make all my choices_

_We can never go back to before_

He'd walked demurely up to the shield hanger. The Troopers had ordered him to halt or they'd fire. Simple enough to deal with. He paused, said with out any sort of difficulty at all. "My name's Luke Skywalker. I'm here to surrender myself. Now who's in command or at least on duty?" They'd been stunned for a moment, and Luke folded his hands behind his back, very, very calm. "Take your time, no rush." They'd stuttered out an answer, to which he'd said, "Excellent. I'd like to see him."

And they hadn't known what else to do but to take him to their commander.

The commander hadn't been much better. He actually recognized the former Imperial Prince when he saw him, and he'd quickly stood up, then sat down again, and then was sort of caught between standing and sitting, unsure of what to do. "I'd like to see Lord Vader, I know he's here, so…"

"Ahh…" the man stuttered. "Well, I….yes, of course, um…." He was about to motion them onward, terribly confused, when Luke held out his wrists.

"I'm a Jedi and a Rebel Officer. It might be a good idea to shackle me." The idea clearly mortified the officer, so torn in his loyalties. He did as the young man asked, clearly reluctant, and very nervous.

"Oh, and…"

"What?"

"My lightsaber?"

"You mean….you want me to take it?" Luke nodded expectantly, and the officer gulped, carefully unclipping it from Luke's belt. "Right….right this way, please."

_There was a time_

_My feet were so solidly planted_

_You'd sail away_

_While I turned my back to the sea_

_I was content_

_A prince, just asleep and enchanted_

_If I had dreams_

_Then I let you dream them for me_

It was….incomprehensible how he could just stand there, so calm, not at all ruffled in the slightest. Stand there and watch him with blue eyes that had not changed in the four years he'd been without the boy. Stand there, glancing at the officer who nervously said what had happened, still with the binders on his wrists, still not at all upset by the current situation.

But maybe that was only because Vader wanted him to show some emotion. Show something that meant that he had been missed and that he was loved.

Then the commander reluctantly stretched out his arm, offering Vader his son's lightsaber, and his mind briefly spun back to the other time an officer had done the same thing. And he wasn't sure which hurt worse.

He watched Luke, who watched him right back, before turning away. "Good work, Commander. Leave us. Conduct your search and bring his companions to me." That _did _merit a response, and he felt a very slight, temporary wave of panic flow from the boy, didn't see the pupils widen for a hidden reason that he was very dubious about. But, really, he wasn't thinking about any of that.

This was the closest he'd been to his boy in four years, excluding that awful mess in Cloud City. That always had to be excluded. Vader's breathing would have gone up in pace with his nervous excitement at the moment were it not consistently regulated, and he just sort of shifted on his feet, trying to break the silence.

"The Emperor has been expecting you."

A slight, cold shudder ran through his son, but it was shrugged off very quickly, soft sounds of the forest around them permeating the silence. "I know, father."

His heart had to have stopped beating. How well he remembered Luke's bitter query of how he had ever called himself his father. And yet, there it was, his boy standing next to him, dressed in black and very powerful, and calling him father….it was too much…It was really too much…

_Back in the days_

_When everything seemed so much clearer_

_People in black, who knew what their lives held in store_

_Where are they now, those people who stared from the mirror?_

_We can never go back to before_

"I…" Vader tried, one hand almost reaching out to brush a lock of stray hair from the blue eyes, but he resisted the feeling. This was still far too dangerous a game to begin to relax now. "It's been a long time." An understatement by a million years. "I'm glad to hear you've finally come to your senses. I'm glad to know you've come back to me."

"I have neither come to my senses, nor am I coming back," he said evenly, sort of taking a step along the catwalk and making his father instinctively keep pace when it ought to have been the other way around. Such was Vader's willingness to compromise if it meant having his son returned to him. "Don't ask me to turn, because I won't do it."

"It's not a matter of asking. This is not a choice. Deep down you've got to realize that. Your brief game at playing Jedi is at an end. Why else would you turn yourself into me?"

"Because I love you, father." Vader stopped his walking, as did Luke, watching and waiting for a response. "And I…I know you love me, too. I know that now. You are my father, you won't turn me over."

"The Dark side is stronger than paternal instincts," Vader said in a low murmur, turning away. But Luke desperately darted in front of him, forcing him to meet those blue eyes.

"Is it stronger than love?" he demanded, and Vader felt something in him start to break. No, not yet. He could not give into this. All the same, he couldn't formulate an answer, and Luke was continuing with unaffected dramatic flair. "Because I don't think so. You've had every chance at killing me because you couldn't turn me, and you've never taken it. Now, why is that, father?"

_There are people out there _

_Unafraid of reveling_

_That they might have a feeling_

_Or they might be wrong_

_There are people out there_

_Unafraid to feel sorrow_

_Unafraid of tomorrow_

_Unafraid to be weak_

_Unafraid to be strong_

Vader did not respond to that, and Luke turned away a bit too soon, staring out the window. Too confident he had his father pegged…. "I know," he was continuing, "that four years can change a great many things, and I am a testament to that. But this…us…that can never change."

He heard the _click, buzz_ of a lightsaber turning on, and the hair on the back of his neck briefly stood up. Oh dear Force…

"I see you've constructed a new lightsaber…" He still sounded so proud of him, something Luke had hated during the fight at Bespin, but now, well…now was different. "Indeed, you are powerful. You are everything I've expected. I am…." No, better not to finish that sentence. Too much emotion, he was losing a terrible battle….

"Then you've underestimated me."

"Funny, I said much the same thing to Obi-Wan once before, when I was about your age."

Luke turned full around, but his ire did not extend beyond that. "Is that supposed to upset me? Are you trying to goad me on? I have not lived these last four years after what you did on the Death Star not to be able to handle something like that, not to be able to control my anger to a certain degree."

"You were always filled with anger. It made you powerful. It made you…_glittering_," was the only word he could liken it to, but Luke would not accept that.

"Then what about now, without all that anger? What about how powerful I am now?"

"You seem to like guessing at my motives. Might I inquire as to your own?" Luke opened his mouth to protest, but Vader held up a hand, stopping him. "Oh yes, I know. There is a reason you came here, there is something ulterior going on. You can deny it to me all you like, but I know you too well, my son."

Luke watched him for a moment, his eyes once more even. "My motives are…" He stopped, trying to fight some emotion he only barely understood himself. "Father….things cannot be as they were before." In a move not even Vader could have predicted, he said barely above a whisper, "Come with me."

_There was a time_

_When you were the person in motion_

_I was your son_

_It never occurred to want more_

_You were my sky_

_My moon, and my stars, and my ocean_

_We can never go back to before_

_We can never go back to before!_

**To Be Continued…**

_I'm really surprised that song-fic worked out as well as it did! All those curious as to why Anakin did turn will find out in the next chapter, so be prepared. The song used was "Back to Before," from Ragtime by Stephen Flaherty and Lynn Ahrens. I did alter the lyrics somewhat to fit better, so please don't sue' _

Stephanie C: Actually, in all honesty, nothing's with the books. They're mentioned in Shadows of the Empire as a convenient plot hole filling device, and I figure if Steven Perry can do it, I sure as hell can. Oh, thanks! I actually have a surprising number of lines…

Ledagirl321: Thanks, this chapter's really grown on me!

Jedi X-man Serena Kenobi: Thank you!

Madame Naberrie: Oh, thank you very much. At first I wasn't sure, but I really have grown to like that chapter.

wildchartermage: That's a good question. But I'm evil, so I'm not going to answer it.

Relyan: Thanks, I really adore reoccurring themes, as if that's not obvious. I almost had Luke use Obi-Wan's line verbatim, but didn't. I really kind of wish I had now, but it still turned out well. Extra cookies for you if you can figure what I did take word for word from another chapter, though.


	52. Part 3 Chapter 9

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Three**

**Chapter Nine**

"What?" Vader whispered hesitantly into the cool, artificially lit corridor.

Luke did not blink, but with a bit more insistence said, "Come with me, father." He took a step towards him, and it made Vader want to shy away for some inexplicable reason. "I cannot follow you anymore. So let me do the leading instead. Come, please, I can save you from your Darkness."

"I don't need to be saved," he insisted stubbornly. "I _chose _Darkness."

"And I chose Light," Luke replied coolly, trying to get his father to give in. "Is the Darkness so much more beautiful."

"You know as well as I. It is far, far stronger."

Luke shook his head, eyes closed. "I don't believe that."

"Yes, well, Obi-Wan has done a lot tinkering with your head. It's just as well that I killed him."

Luke's eyes shot open and he froze again. "That isn't going to work, father."

"On the contrary, it already has."

Luke felt himself tremble, about to hesitate, when he finally asked firmly, "Father….what happened to my mother?" Vader had frozen completely, horrified at the question. Luke pressed on. "Just tell me, I'm sure I could understand!"

"How can you possibly understand?" his father growled in a low whisper. "_Nobody _can understand. They never did. Even she didn't understand."

"Then share the burden with me!"

"I…." No. He didn't have to give into this. He'd dodged the boy's every question for seventeen years, there was no sense in changing now. But Luke took another step, very close. Very tantalizing and real and full of delicious possibilities that could not even be dreamt of without the boy.

And as for the boy's fine blond hair, his pale blue eyes….it didn't matter. Vader was painfully reminded that there had and always would be times he could see Luke as his mother's son.

"Please," he asked softly, and Vader had rarely had the strength to fight that tone of voice, that look in his eyes.

"She…" Vader stopped, trying to garner up strength. "She was the senator from Naboo, and I was Obi-Wan's padawan. I was supposed to protect her from assassination attempts and I did. I was twenty, she was twenty five, we fell in love and…."

"And?" Luke gently maintained.

"And…about three years later the council found out about it. I….I don't know how they could have, I'm still not sure, but Chancellor Palpatine-"

"_Chancellor_ Palpatine?"

"-offered me safety, protection, and….all the powers of a Sith Lord. And so, the day before our trial before the Council was supposed to begin, I…."

Luke had frozen, stunned. "You abandoned her." And Vader said nothing. "You…you _betrayed _her!"

"She betrayed me!" he cried vehemently. "She and Obi-Wan and all the Jedi! And my master offered the true path. You think Darkness can blind, don't you? Well, you don't even know until you realize that Light can too. That's right, Luke," he whispered while his son tried to absorb it all, trembling. "You're just as blind as you were four years ago. And not as strong as you could be. So you tell me, is it worth all of this wailing and moaning and carrying on? Is it that much more self-righteous to be a slave of the Light?"

Luke didn't answer for a long time, before his eyes suddenly snapped in his father's direction and asked, "And what about u-…What about me?"

Why had he almost said us. Oh God, why had he almost said us! He could not even begin to crumble yet if Leia was on the line, and that little slip could have been deadly…

_Alright, now I'm afraid…._

Vader paused, taken aback. "What do you mean what about you?"

"How did I become the Imperial Prince? How did all of this happen."

Vader inwardly preened to the question, able to handle it in all the smoothness of a patient anger. "Obi-Wan would have had you hidden away on some tenth rate planet, forced to become a Jedi. Your mother would have had you never know me, never know your true potential. They betrayed us both, Luke. Obi-Wan _would _have had you be a Jedi. But my ship stumbled across his, and I took you from him. Destiny takes a hand, so you see."

"Obi-Wan _would _have had me be a Jedi?" Luke asked calmly. "Then what am I now?"

Patiently, Vader responded, "You are confused."

"I don't think so. I don't think things have ever been this clear in my entire life."

"So you think you know your destiny, do you?"

Luke paused. "Not at all. But I won't let it rule me."

Vader took a long moment to sort of watch his son, momentarily mesmerized by the shinning presence in the Force. That had to be _his_, he had to be able to make Luke see the vision and go for it with all his soul the way he once had. It was as much for the son as it was for the father.

"Why are you fighting me?" Vader finally asked, and Luke shook his head.

"We don't have a fight, either of us. I refuse the idea."

"If you're not with me, you're my enemy."

"I am your _son_!" he cried passionately, eyes flaring. "I am for the salvation of your soul, not to give strength to tyranny."

"And why not? Tyranny has it's uses. The Empire functions the way the Old Republic never did."

"That doesn't matter. People are enslaved, they are starving, they are dying. And I can't stand by and watch as one man controls it, allows it to happen."

"But, Luke," Vader reminded fiercely. "You're the one who is going to be controlling and allowing it to happen someday."

The young Jedi took a step back, shook his head. "I don't believe that, no. I will not sit on the Imperial Throne and I will not be the Imperial Prince."

"Will not be? You already _are_."

"No!"

They stopped again, soft night sounds gently permeating the walls around them. Foliage pressed up against the windows, a reminder of the living Force. All around them, constantly a part of them, in every breath they drew it was there.

And Luke had chosen the Light side, and he would not give it up.

"If she's as backstabbing, as awful as you say she was…." Luke was asking, "why do you still love her?"

Vader's heart stopped for a split second. "Who?"

"My mother."

"I…I don't love her."

"Yes, you do. I know you do. Because if you didn't, then you wouldn't love me at all."

Vader felt his knees buckling, felt his strength giving.

_This is our child, Padmè…._

This was a part of them, and here it stood, twenty two years old and just as amazing and surprising and beautiful as the very first day he'd held him. This was a testament to their love. And Vader wanted to reach out and clutch his boy and never let go – but he couldn't do that. Couldn't let Luke win. Couldn't let the Light win.

Was Luke light? Was he his fall back into grace? No, he couldn't believe that.

"Love is not the question here."

"Then what is? Power? No, that fades too quickly. Wealth? You don't care about wealth. What's left, father? What do you have left to hold onto and believe in?"

"Maybe I have nothing to believe in. Maybe I've grown wise enough to know that all those things that you cling so desperately to will fade in time."

"Then I pity you to have no impossible dream."

"What's the point of dreaming the impossible dream? What's the point of fighting lost causes?"

"Because they're the only ones worth fighting for." Vader moved to protest, but Luke beat him to it. "They're the only ones worth _dying _for. To give everything you have to a single glorious quest." Luke closed his eyes for a moment, filled with an unseen power even greater than the Force. "And that's why I'm a Jedi. That is my quest, to follow that unfading star." He opened his eyes again, sizing up, entreating his father. "What happened to your star, father? You've only lost sight of it."

And in a gesture that he had not done since he was a child, Luke reached out and too his father's hand, even with the binders still clapped around his wrist. And Vader was stunned, unable to move, unable to breath, unable to protest.

"Let me show you your star."

And they stood like that for a long time, father and son in the pale, yellow light on the catwalk, silent except for the sounds of the forest. Stood there and said nothing, because there was nothing worth saying that hadn't been said already, promised already, _known_ already. Soul to soul and mind to mind they stood, and Vader felt his heart cracking under the pressure of his son's big, blue eyed gaze, expectant and patient and unwavering.

Finally, after such a long, struggling moment, he took his son's hands, and gently pushed them down so they hung in front of the boy again. "It's….too late for me, my son."

"I've never believed that. I never will."

"Well, now you must." He singled to some distant Storm Troopers, and Luke did not blink as they gently circled him, did not take his gaze from his father.

"We must be dead to each other," Vader insisted, motioning for the guards to take him away. They hesitated, and Luke just watched him. Why, _why _did he have to keep watching him like that, making him feel those eyes on him, making his tremble. But after another moment, they carefully grabbed the young man's arms, leading him to the elevator. Unresisting, Luke stepped in, turned and faced his father again who could not look away.

"You've never been dead to me, father."

And Vader felt himself choke, would have maybe even flung himself foreword and grabbed his boy and dragged him to safety far, far away from the transport that would take him to the Death Star, to the Emperor – were it not for the fact that the doors were already closing. And that second of hesitation was all it took to fail in all aspects. And he continued to stare at the door even after his boy was out of sight. Really, he couldn't look away. He trembled and shook and wondered, which was the worst of all things, the wondering. Wondering for a split second where they'd be right now if he had followed him….

_Oh God, what have I done?_

**To Be Continued…**

_So, all the back story secrets are out! I think. Except that Leia is Vader's daughter. And that Mara was pregnant. And….._

_Oh, and if you'll all remember that sucky job I took last August…I DON'T HAVE IT ANYMORE! YES! I hated that job. I've been trying to quit since December. But they're closing the store so I got laid off. Yessssssss….._

Spirit White: Sorry if my updates aren't that soon. I'm super short on time.

Madame Naberrie: I'm so super glad you like it

Shi Feng Huang: Wow, I didn't think of it as funny, but I'm glad you liked it!

Jessica -Angel- Skywalker: Thank you

Stephanie C: If you have imesh, you can find it on there.

Ledagirl321: None taken, I really appreciate the honesty. I was debating with doing one more songfic chapter, and your review convinced me not to. I'm really glad to know what you honestly thought.

Myotismon13: I kinda liked this one.

denique: Hm, well, I'm afraid that's a secret.


	53. Part 3 Chapter 10

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Three**

**Chapter Ten**

He had his eyes closed tightly, trembling slightly as he tried very, very hard to keep from hyperventilating. He was afraid, there was no shame in it. But it would be his undoing if he didn't get it under control.

Luke was afraid, yes. Because the elevator was going up. Because he was standing next to his father who was offering him like a sacrificial lamb to his master.

Because Luke had always been afraid of Palpatine – four years changed nothing.

And Vader had to remember countless times of the boy's begging and pleading when he was small, beseeching his father to not make him visit the emperor's throne room and the unbridled terrors that awaited him there.

And so he rather instinctually reached out in the Force to comfort his son, and Luke's eyes shot open, and almost glared in his direction. No, he didn't hate him, he wasn't even angry. But comfort was far from useful at this point.

"Don't even try," the young Jedi whispered harshly. "I've accepted what you're doing. Now let me try and change it." Vader drew his presence back, and they were silent once more. The elevator jerked to a halt, throwing young Skywalker slightly off balance, making his eyes go wide for a moment as he fought desperately to retain any composure at all.

There was no turning back, there was nothing to be done. He had to face his nightmares, and that was that.

_God, help me, Obi-Wan. I need strength._

Vader pushed his son slightly to get him walking up to the foot of the stairs to the emperor's dais, where Vader paused and bowed. Luke stood pole straight, nostrils flared as he breathed heavily, trying to stay calm – staring down the emperor.

Vader stood again, and with a slight cackle of amusement, Palpatine lazily drawled, "Welcome, Lord Skywalker." He sounded as if he would have been bored if the situation weren't so amusing. "I have been expecting you." Luke stiffened, opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted. "You no longer need those," he said, motioning to the binders which now slid off his wrists, and Luke did nothing; he just stood there. He said something to the Red Guard Luke did not hear, and they slowly filed out, leaving two Sith and one Jedi completely alone.

And whether he was a Jedi or not was subject to debate.

"Now," Palpatine said in a mockingly pleasant way, almost business like. "I'm glad to see your senseless little adventure is at an end. You will kneel, young Skywalker, I am your master."

"You're not," Luke quickly responded softly, firmly. "You haven't been for four years and I will not bend the knee."

There was a dangerous flash in Palpatine's yellow eyes, a vicious sneer on his face. "How four years has corrupted you! No matter, my Imperial Prince, it shall be righted."

"I'm not-"

_Luke, don't talk, just listen_.

Luke shot his father a glance, swallowing, almost glaring. How could Vader not see?

Vader held the glance for an excruciating moment before carefully ascending the steps to Palpatine. "His lightsaber," he offered, the same way he'd offered Kenobi's four years ago.

Palpatine greedily snatched it up, grinning maliciously. He stroked the weapon for a moment before putting it down on the arm rest of his throne. "A new weapon, my apprentice? I wonder what color the blade is." He now was grinning at Luke, who was amazed when his knees did not buckle. "By now you must know your father can never be turned from the Dark Side. Equally true, you have not left it. Let me show you its true power…."

Luke's eyes widened as he felt the oily, black presence work its way towards him as he stood frozen. No, he couldn't give in like this! With a mighty shove with the Force, Light radiated around him once more, and he cried out, "No!" He paused a moment, trying to breath, clinging to the Light. "I will not be a Sith again." Palpatine laughed, and Luke balked, failing to find the situation funny. "Soon I'll be dead. We'll all be dead."

"You think that, if you like." Palpatine leaned foreword now, eyes glinting in the darkness of the makeshift throne room. "Perhaps you refer to the imminent attack of your Rebel fleet?" and Luke's eyes widened. "No need to worry," the emperor continued. "We are quite safe here."

"The Rebels will succeed!" he cried with a passion. "The Empire will fall."

"And so will a young Jedi by the name of Luke Skywalker."

Luke tried to protest again, but his father cut him off once more. "It is pointless to resist, my son." And this time Luke didn't look at him, had his eyes glued to Palpatine. Palpatine was talking again, but Luke only barely heard him, eyes wide, breathing slightly erratic.

No…Oh, Force, no, they couldn't have failed! The goal so close, so attainable, and of course then the Empire would close its grimy fist and strangle them. Oh, God, no, not like this!

"Come, boy," Palpatine was saying, starting to sound rather bored. "See for yourself." Mechanically, the young man moved up the stairs, seeing nothing but the small window and the stars and the battle raging outside. He couldn't breath, his hands reached out and clutched the pane, in utter torment. But Lando, the Rebels….Mon Mothma, General Rieekan, Han, Leia! They couldn't fail! They couldn't die!

But there the evidence was, right before his eyes. They'd laid out a nice little trap and the Alliance had walked right into it, blindly at willingly.

And Luke for a split second turned and saw his lightsaber. And nothing else could be absorbed into his mind. It was with extreme effort he didn't call it to him; now he was walking into the trap, and he knew it. Painfully he knew it but could not stop it.

"You want this, don't you? The hate is swelling in you!"

_No…_

"…With each passing moment you make yourself more my servant."

"No!"

Vader watched the scene from the sidelines, willing his boy to simply give in – it was the only way to stop the pain, and as soon as he embraced the Dark again, he would find it all tolerable, bearable.

"It is unavoidable. It is your destiny."

Luke turned now, back to the window, in obvious agony. "You're all very good about predicting my future, aren't you? Well _you don't know yet_, do you? I refuse all your lofty ideas, I…." his voice broke, dulled, his temporary strength fading.

Palpatine just grinned at him. "Refuse all you like. It will all still happen." Luke forced himself to look out the window again, trying so hard…. "You are as you have always been – mine."

The Super Star Destroyers had closed them in….why weren't they firing, what were they waiting for? And Luke's eyes widened as comprehension slowly dawned, and Palpatine just laughed again. He said something Luke tried to block from his mind, but the last words took hold. Took hold and would not leave again:

"Fire at will, Commander."

_Oh dear God…_

"Your fleet has lost, and your friends on the Endor moon will not survive." No! "There is no escape, my young apprentice. The Alliance will die….as will your friends." His knees were buckling now, hands desperately clutching the window. He turned – no! No, not like this….He tried to turn back to the window, but all he had to do was spin, grab his lightsaber, strike the emperor down, and… No, not like this, not like…

Well, why not like this? Didn't he want to be a hero? Didn't he want, didn't he _vow_ to destroy the Empire? What better way then right here, right now? And all he had to do was turn, and…

It was too much.

Luke flew to action, spinning around. His saber flew into his hands, there was a quick _snap, hiss! _as it ignited, and he swung with every power he had. But, hold! His father's red blade countered his, cracking and snapping in the silent throne room as the emperor smiled. Luke was sweating slightly, anger and hatred and every feeling he'd worked four years to over come swelling in him as he glared at his father. No turning back, he'd past the point of no return.

Nothing was held back, everything was employed and the year he'd spent training after Bespin showed as a very surprised Vader was forced back, back, back. He lost his balance – tumbling down the stairs, where Luke stood momentarily victorious, and –

Emperor Palpatine was saying something and a piece of it registered within the young Jedi. He gasped in pain, eyes widening; he turned off the weapon in a panic, taking a few frantic steps back, shaking his head.

_Not like this…._

"Obi-Wan has taught you well," Vader snarled, but the son shook his head.

"I will not fight you, father."

Painfully slowly, Vader walked back up the ramp, and Luke watched him warily, taking a few more steps back.

"You are unwise to lower your defenses!" And Luke was forced to turn the weapon back on, dodging, shifting, blocking every chance he could, until he finally took a reverse flip, landing on the catwalk above. And there he stood – his father could not reach him here, he was left to gasp for breath, reach out desperately for the Light Side. "What is it you want?" the young Jedi begged. "A civil war? _I will not fight you_, and that is the end of it!" Vader paused, stricken, and a soft smile slowly crept onto Luke's face as he stood. "Your thoughts betray you, father. I _feel _the good in you-"

"There is no-"

"The conflict."

"There is no conflict!" he cried, taking a stance, hands tightening on his weapon. "Fool yourself there is, I don't care! You will bend or you will fall."

Luke shook his head – he was winning, he knew that now. "You couldn't bring yourself to kill me before and I don't believe you'll destroy me now." He was upright now, tossing away his lightsaber boldly – oh, he was a Jedi, there could be no denying it!

"This is at an end."

**To Be Continued…**

_So, the reason there hasn't been many updates recently isn't because I haven't wanted to update, isn't because I want to end this thing in March, isn't because of a lot of reasons. It's because I'm so insanely busy. I haven't even had time to do homework. The musical ends the 11th, and while it'll be festival season after that, my schedule should be clear enough that regular updates should come forthwith. Thanks again for your support!_

Shi Feng Huang: Oh, thank you! I'm glad you liked it! She'll show up at the Epilogue.

Jedi X-man Serena Kenobi: Thank you!

Schnickledooger: So help me God, I will never, _ever _do the dancing girl Palpatine idea. Ew.

As for whether Vader survives or not, I'm not telling. I mean, it would be rather awfully clichéd to have him live and play happy families with Luke, and I'm adverse to the idea. But that doesn't necessarily mean Vader's gonna die. I'm just not telling.

Madame Naberrie: (You spelled natural right, by the by) Oh, wow thank you oh so much! That is extremely kind, it means a lot. I actually write these as I go, and only rarely do an actual plot outline – I haven't with this fic, which is a good thing. The original idea was strictly Luke and Vader and Leia esque. Mara and Xizor did not make an entrance, which would have been really sad. I think they added an amazing range to the fic that wouldn't have been there otherwise. I love seeing where the story takes me. However, for uber complicated things I do do some form of an outline. Anyway, I'm really glad you liked it, and I'm sorry it took so long to update!

Jessica -Angel- Skywalker: Well, if Luke can help it, Vader's never gonna know. He's got to keep Leia safe.

Stephanie C: A prequel? Wow, I never thought of that… Lol, thanks for the advice. I don't think it'll happen but it's an interesting challenge

Princess-Aiel: Oh, thanks so much.

denique: Thank you very much!

Ledagirl321: Ew, I hope he gets a better job as I'm sure he deserves one.

Amylion: …You now have my permission to ignore everything previously written here. Big misunderstanding. Sorry person Thought you were Nathan. –shifty glance-


	54. Part 3 Chapter 11

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Three**

**Chapter Eleven**

"You cannot hide forever, Luke."

On the contrary, he could hide, and he would stay that way for as long as possible. The catwalk had been cut from right under him, and down he'd tumbled, rolling under the staircase to the emperor's dais.

_I will not fight you_, was his only call in the darkness, eyes shut tightly as he calmed his breathing.

"Give yourself to the Dark Side. It is the only way you can save your friends…."

Luke's eyes shot open. Oh God…Something in him trembled, and mechanically he reached out a hand to grab a support, visibly shaking. No, no, he couldn't believe that. He couldn't….

But Han, and Wedge, and Lando, and-

"Your feelings for them are strong. Especially for…"

_No…_

Vader stumbled, his forced breathing not giving a sign to his sudden unrest. "What?" was the harsh whisper in the darkness, and Luke gulped, terrified. "You…you have a….a _sister_?" Luke didn't know how he hadn't cried out by this point, didn't think he could speak at all. "So…Obi-Wan thought to hide her, as well….You will both come home to me. It is your destiny, you are a part of the Dark Side."

"_No!_"

He didn't even realize his saber was on as he rushed his father, pushed him back, back, back, amid Palpatine's terrible laugh. There was only the here and the now, and the clashing of weapons in heated combat until the young Jedi had his sire briefly pinned against the wall.

"I won't let you touch her!"

"Luke, listen to me, I-"

"No, you listen!" And it was all he could do to step back, to hold his lightsaber pointed at his father's chest to keep him from twitching a muscle, to hold his focus sharp to make both of the other occupants of the room be leery of him. "My whole life someone's been telling me what I'm meant to be. Not just the Sith, I admit the Jedi said it, too. Well, I'm _tired_. Do you hear me? I'm _tired_ of the whole damn thing! I haven't worked for four years for you, or them, or for anybody else! I did it because I chose it, and not because of destiny. It's time for _me _to chose my destiny." He took a few more faltering steps back, breathing heavily. "It's time I decide where I am going to."

And for several tense seconds they just stood like that in the gloom, both opponents panting. But the brief, turbulent calm couldn't last.

Emperor Palpatine clapped sarcastically from his chair, rising up with a sneer on his lips. "A beautiful speech, my young apprentice. But you cannot escape your fate. You are as bound to me as your father was at your age. Now give in, you can't possibly win."

Luke's attention was split, and he now faced the emperor. "You're wrong, I already have."

"You like to think your father's loyalty lies with you? Hardly." And Luke quickly ducked as his father started a fresh swipe at his head. And then it was all back to the beginning again, Palpatine egging him on from the sidelines, Luke now furiously fighting, driving his father onto the bridge to the elevator shaft. Attacking uncontrollably until he had him down, until he had him beaten, until-

Until he swiped off his hand.

Robotic, that's all it was. _More machine than man now…_ The flesh and blood man who sired him did not exist, and Luke was yanked viciously back into reality at the sight of this. The body was gone.

But the soul….

And wasn't that why he'd come, for the soul? Didn't he promise Obi-Wan he could save him? And hadn't he promised Leia?

_Oh, God, what have I done!_

Luke's knees buckled as he heard the emperor laughing behind him. No, he would not live another day if he failed. He would not simply kill the emperor or any such thing. None of this was simple. He would not live another day if he returned to Leia having failed in what he promised her he'd do.

"Your hate has made you powerful." Luke shook his head, eyes still locked onto his father's. "Now, fulfill your destiny and take your father's place at my side."

Luke choked. What? He expected him to kill him? After seventeen years being raised by the man to be Imperial Prince? He'd hated Palpatine far too long, loved his father far too dearly to ever even consider-

But what if he….

….No. No, he wasn't going to do it. In point of fact, gasping for breath, he turned, tossed away his lightsaber, and shook his head. "I won't do it…" he croaked. More boldly now, he proclaimed, "You failed, Your Majesty. I am a Jedi, and I will neither bend nor break. I refute your destiny, and claim my own. There," he finished, standing tall, chest puffed out. "You can do nothing worse."

Normally, under any other circumstance, Luke would have trembled instantaneously at the look that now crossed Palpatine's face. But nothing could phase him now, nothing could make him fear. He had fought the uphill battle for four years, and even if it had meant his death, he had won.

So he didn't mind so much when the Force Lightning mercilessly attacked. He only cried out once, only locked eyes with his father who stood at his attacker's side once, and slid to the floor and into unconsciousness quietly.

He had won.

…

_"I will go on. You showed me the way. I will not fail you."_

Luke felt himself being pulled out of the blackness of his own subconscious as if being pulled from the brink of death. And really it wasn't so hard to think that that was where he'd been. He gasped for a moment, blinking sensitive eyes as he tried desperately to understand the last few turbulent minutes.

There was no Palpatine. Gone, something told him – the Force told him – and not to return. And for a brief moment of utter panic, when he could not see his father, when his eyes hadn't fully adjusted, he'd feared the same for Darth Vader.

Who had just earned the name Anakin Skywalker again.

Luke finally caught sight of the massive body, slumped against a rail by the reactor shaft, and Luke had to drag himself there, and then with great effort pull his father away, sitting up and putting the masked head in his lap. Luke coughed, tried to smile, winced in absolute pain. Oh, there had always been a reason to fear Palpatine as a child….

"Father," he gasped as the man's erratic breathing filled the room with an eerie sound. "I don't hate you."

"No…" Vader whispered, reaching a gloved hand out, trying to reach his son's face. "No, of course not."

"And I'm sorry for all the times I said I did, and all the times I hurt you, and I all the times I disappointed you, and-"

"You never disappointed me."

Luke smiled slightly, opened his mouth, shut it again. With much effort, the scratchy young voice asked, "Think you can get up?"

"I'm not sure."

"Try, _please_, you've got to try. It's alright," he reassured as the respirator became particularly noisy. "I'm going to take you home."

"Home?"

"Yes, home…you and I never really had that, I know, but that's okay…We can be a family, it's alright…"

Vader shuddered as his machinery broke down. "It's a nice dream."

"We've earned it," his son assured fiercely. "And we will have it."

"Luke, I…I broke your mother's heart."

There was a pause, blue eyes rapidly blinking as he fumbled. After a moment he coughed, "Yes…Yes, I suspect you did."

"And I killed so many of your friends, and the Jedi-"

"Father," he interrupted, trying to smile. "I think this list could go on for a while."

"Yet for all that….you still came back." He was in such awe of it that it amazed Luke. Didn't he think he would? Didn't he know? Their love was richer and more powerful than anything the universe could try to throw at them. Not even death could stop it.

"Yes, of course I did! None of that matters now, don't you see? I love you unconditionally, I always did. I forgive you for everything you cannot forgive yourself. I am your _son_, no strings attached! Always and forever. I love you and ask for nothing in return."

The redeemed creature squeezed the young man's hand, desperate with emotion. "I'd give you everything."

"Then just give me yourself. And that's enough." They sat like that for some moments still, just catching their breath with a terrible sort of urgency as an icy hand like death swept in closer, and closer…

Luke was desperate to dodge it. "Come on, let's try to get you up. We're getting out of here." And there the struggle only just began.

…

Feet, _inches _away from the shuttle they needed to get them out of there. So close, so obtainable. And that's what made it so cruel for Luke's strength to just collapse, for his father's suit to truly fail. It was with great effort that the son lay his father down on the shuttle ramp, gasping for breath, both the same. The Forced cracked and buzzed and seemed to whisper, _Time, time, and no more time_.

No. He refused that idea. He hadn't fought this hard for his father to lose him now.

"Luke?" the aged man feebly begged. "Help me take this mask off."

Luke paused, still trying to regain strength. He shivered, refused. "You'll die."

"Nothing can stop that now."

"_Please_ don't talk like that!" he pleaded. "I won't give up on you now."

"I want…just once…to see you. With my own eyes."

"The price is too high. Wait until I can get you to a medical ward."

"No. Now."

There was no fighting that. The son paused, stared at his father's mask for a moment…and carefully reached out a hand to remove it.

**To Be Continued…**

Stephanie C: Thanks, we perform in about a week and a half.

Jessica -Angel- Skywalker: Well, Luke let it slip alright…

Jedi X-man Serena Kenobi: I kept forgetting I had this written up, so it's a touch late…

denique: Yeah, sorry, it will end soon. But I'll start another fic which I actually think will be even better.

Madame Naberrie: Oh, thank you so much! Doing evil for the right reasons is still evil. It's inescapable. Hopefully Luke has figured that out…

Schnickledooger: Here you are, Palpatine's dead. As for Vader, well, we'll see.


	55. Part 3 Chapter 12

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Part Three**

**Chapter Twelve**

There was a blinding flash of light, something eyes could not adjust to, because his already had. He saw nothing but light, endless and beautiful, and he heard voices far off, and the light grew stronger now. He felt the cold air on his dead skin, which he hadn't felt in twenty three years.

"Father?"

And the light faded, leaving only the briefest halo around the head of his son, who was holding him tenderly, unafraid by his gruesome appearance.

_An angel…_

And Vader, Anakin, closed his eyes for a moment and allowed himself to think of the boy's mother.

He was going home. And it momentarily pained him to think he would lose Luke because of that, but he knew better. He could never lose him.

He opened his eyes again when a tear drop stained his cheek. His son was crying over him. Not even over his appearance, he could tell, but over his soul, which was slowly gaining some whiteness amidst the black that had so long tainted it.

The halo around the boy's head – no doubt caused by a ceiling light angled just conveniently…surely…. – did not fade. The boy _was _light.

"There," Luke gulped, straining to control his voice. "Can I put it back on now? It's not that it bothers me, I don't care one way or the other, I just don't want you to go without it for too long, in case you might…."

Good God, it was like looking in a mirror! Those eyes! They'd always been that heart melting blue, but had they ever been so sparkly, even with the tears?

Vader, Anakin, shook his head. He was never putting that mask back on ever again.

"Please?" begged the loyal son. "You must live," he pleaded. "You've got to see Leia. I really think she and Han are gonna seriously hook up. The way they look at each other…it's quite disgusting….Father?"

The light was coming back….

"Father, please…."

No, he couldn't leave him like this.

Reaching out a trembling hand, he felt it tightly grasped by the young man, who pressed it to his cheek in desperation. Oh, the boy was too good for him….

"There," he whispered hoarsely. "You've won….I'm so proud of you…." Luke didn't respond, leaning in to catch the soft words. "I love you…so much…"

"I know you do…" Luke murmured fiercely.

"Now…you go on….go back to your sister and your friends….I've got…to go too…."

And Vader, Anakin started slipping back again, started closing his eyes. All was calm, even with the sirens blaring and the officers running about in a mad frenzy.

"Don't leave me!"

Like a frightened child! How could he deny that voice? He'd tried when Luke was still a boy, but it had never worked.

"Everyone always leaves me…."

"Not me," he whispered, fighting for these last moments only because he knew his son needed them so desperately. "I will stay with you for the rest of eternity."

"Please…."

"I'm so happy…" It was almost impossible to hear him now. "Thank you…" _Anakin_ was smiling.

"Father…" No reply as the form slipped further from his grasp. "Father!" Nothing. The body fell from his grip, and the soul fled into the light it saw, among the voices it had always treasured, and Luke sat there dumbstruck, mute. Like a knife was plunged into his heart, and being twisted. He gasped for air, felt himself trembling.

_I couldn't even save him! Not one person! Force, why! Not one person…_

There was nothing he could do, and he was too afraid to die. But there was the shuttle, and beyond that was a short hop to Endor.

What else could he do?

…

When the shuttle had landed with both of its passengers, only one got up – because only one could. And when the ramp was lowered, only one began the descent – because only one could manage it.

And when that one – being a bruised and bloodied Luke – saw an ecstatic Leia waiting for him, his knees buckled, he stomach flipped, and he ultimately collapsed at the ground in front of her.

This sent Leia into a tizzy, who was grabbing him and shaking him and about to go screaming for a medic when she was able to tell that Luke's vital signs were not failing.

"Luke?" she asked, trembling from her momentary scare. He was inconsolable, and she knew he hadn't really cried since Obi-Wan had died, and she slowly lowered herself to the ground next to it.

He took her hands, pressing them to his face and trying to breath. He spilled the whole episode to her there, them just sitting there while words flowed uninterrupted from his lips. "I failed him…Damn it, I couldn't do anything! Not a damn thing!" His tirade would have gone on had she not freed her hands to smooth back his hair while she whispered hush.

"What are you talking about?"

He stared up at her with red rimmed eyes that didn't even have the luxury of being hollow – they weren't completely beaten with the shock of it, they felt every pain freshly and acutely. "He's dead," he choked out, and Leia blinked at him, still pushing hair out of his eyes.

"And that's why you think you failed?"

He nodded. "Why am I so useless? Why do I try so hard to save people if the only thing I do is hurt them? I _killed_ him!"

"I don't believe that."

"I may as well have. If I hadn't fought him, if I hadn't worn him out-"

"If only you'd give into the Dark Side? Luke, listen – and hear me!" He stopped his sniffling, met her tragic gaze and felt a strange, calming stupor fall over him. She struggled for a moment. "He…You didn't fail him. He died loving you, and Sith can't love. So he wasn't a Sith. He died a good man, and didn't you say yourself you went to save his soul? Well, Luke, you saved his soul. You couldn't protect his body, had to hurt it in order to accomplish what had to happen, but you still _won_." She stood now, gently pulling him up with her. "I refuse to hate you for something like this, and I demand you see clearly. Alright, maybe you can't save the galaxy. Really, no one asked you to. But you _did _save Anakin Skywalker, Luke. And that's more than enough, more than most people can do."

They wrapped their arms around each other, his sobs fading into hiccups as he clung to her in the gathering darkness of the forest moon, and his breathing slowly calmed. Yes, she was right, something told him that. And at least that was something….

…

He was gentle when he put the finishing touches of the pyre together, laid the mask down. He let his fingers roam the surface of the barrier his father had hated all his days momentarily, and sighed. He wasn't happy. He couldn't be, because he missed his father terribly.

But all he had to do was reach out, and there he was – glittering in the Force like a newly born star.

He simply looked at the funeral pyre for a long moment, drank up the scene that he knew he'd carry with him for the rest of his days. Burned onto his retinas, like Obi-Wan's death at his father's hands, the corpses of his family on Tatooine, watching Yoda die in that small, dirty hut…And though the memories sounded unpleasant, he did not think of them with fear or even bitterness. He acknowledged that they happened, and nothing he could have said or done would really have changed it. He would have liked for things to work out differently, but there it was.

He would have liked to have had a real, semi-complete family. But he had his sister, and if he ever wanted to see his mother or his father, he could reach out. They were still a family, even if they weren't quite tangible.

And thinking of his long separated parents together made Luke smile, even as he remembered the torch in his hand, waiting to burn the body of the man he'd loved dearly all his life. The only family he had thought he'd had in the entire galaxy – and there he'd been proven wrong. That was a gift to treasure if anything was.

Well, and? Burn the body, and he destroyed nothing. The soul had been saved, and continued on; would continue on until the end of everything. Luke had to believe that.

Obi-Wan, and Yoda, and his mother and father….they were all right there. He hadn't lost them. He never had.

So he didn't mind when he put the torch slowly down to catch fire with the funeral pyre he'd made with absolute care and intensity. He tossed the rest of the stick in once the wood caught, and took a step back, watching the flames grow. He smelled the suit burning as the fire began to consume it, and he didn't care. He watched the flame like every aspect of the funeral landing – and if fire could destroy, couldn't it cleanse? Wasn't gold put through fires that were white hot, and didn't it emerge glittering?

And thus was life. Hard and hot, but, ultimately, worth the price.

Luke closed his eyes to the warmth of the fire, life circulating warm and real in the next generation, and who knew what that could give birth to. Yes, he'd won. Obi-Wan had won, his father had won, nothing mattered anymore. He was at peace with the universe for the moment. He knew he would watch the pyre burn until the embers were finally entirely gone, but in the morning would wake up still aching for his father like the lost child he was. But he would handle that when the time came. Living one day at a time. He could handle that. Maybe as he got better at it he could even try planning whole weeks ahead, but he wasn't quite up to that stage yet. Yes, better be patient. He had learned patience, Obi-Wan had said he would. For the moment, life was marvelous, even with the ache in his chest. He could go back to the party the Rebels were throwing and really smile, not just fake it. Be with the people he loved, who had supported him in his four year struggle. How did anyone survive in this world alone? The couldn't surely. What was living if there was no one to share it with? He and his father had had each other, but even with him gone, Luke was not alone. And he was comforted to know that.

He knew who he was, finally. And where he was going to, for the moment. And nothing else really mattered.

**End Part Three**

_Wow. The end of the final part. All that's left is the Epilogue, with the long awaited Mara Jade. Again, wow. In twelve days, this fic will be a year old. I've got older fics, but this is the only one that lasted a year with pretty much constant updating. Wow. I think I'll just skip to reviews now and make a big long speech on the final chapter. Don't know when that'll be, as I'm still pretty busy. I'd like it to be the fifteenth, I think that'd be pretty neat. Anyway, yours – Shadow13_

Jedi X-man Serena Kenobi: Sorry, I never liked the whole "Vader lived!" thing anymore than the "Padme lived!" thing. True, I'll be using the later in my next fic, and it's an interesting idea, but most of the time it's really abused. You have to play these sort of things. I've tried to be pretty careful in this fic. Of course, there's evidence of where I messed up, but otherwise, I don't want this getting too messed up.

Schnickledooger: Um….yes.

Jessica -Angel- Skywalker: I certainly hope so….

Myotismon13: Aw, thank you so much!

Stephanie C: Well, I mean, if I suddenly found out I had a daughter, I think there would be a big WTF moment there, personally. So I just played it off of that.

Madame Naberrie: Wow, your reviews are so much fun! Anyway, nope, sorry. Vader is as burned as Padme is dead. That's just the way it crumbles, cookie wise.

denique: It's another AU (I think I'm incapable or writing anything other than AU) It's got some similarities to this one on the outside, but it's really terribly different. Basically, it's just a "What if everything is switched around?" Anakin and Obi-Wan don't fight on Mustafar, Padme doesn't die in child birth, but Breha does, Luke initially lives with Obi-Wan on Tatooine before ways I'm still shifting through ends up becoming Imperial Prince (surprise, surprise), Mara ends up being Obi-Wan's apprentice. Big complicated mess. Just trust me: It'll be _good_.

Relyan: Oh, thank you so much! I mean, there's still that element of destiny, i.e. "Luke, you're destined to be a Jedi," other dimension Luke's emotions then forcing him to become one, etc. But ultimately, still, destiny depends on his own choices, not anyone else. Not even his other self. Did that make any sense? I think I just confused myself.

Amylion: And in that respect, he'll never die.


	56. Epilogue

**Where Am I Going To?**

**Epilogue**

Dawn was rising on Endor. This wasn't anything extraordinary, as it had happened many times before, and would for a long while. Happened on most planets everyday, in fact.

But Luke speculated that you could appreciate every breath you drew more when you'd been truly threatened with the prospect of not breathing at all.

He'd gotten up early to realize he'd been dreaming of his father – and that wasn't really a good thing, as he now felt like a heavy rock was settling on his chest, and that could only sadden him more.

He'd wanted to get in the X-Wing given him and just get out of there before anyone woke up, but that was neither kind nor fair. Leia would be in her political element now, and men like Han and Wedge could deal with any situation. But him? Well, he wasn't the Imperial Prince, and he wasn't even a Rebel anymore as the Rebels were the power in the galaxy. So what was he? And he figured he'd have to leave to find out.

But he owed it to the people he loved who'd been with him for four years. So he had a quiet breakfast of sorts out in the open air with Leia and Han and Wedge. They didn't really eat much of anything, mostly sat there drinking caff, and talking; kind of quiet because they were in awe of what they'd accomplished and weren't sure where they would go from here.

But they'd do alright, Luke knew that.

"So where to now?" Leia asked him, standing at his side while Han leaned against a tree and Wedge sat on an old log.

"Honestly?" Luke ran a hand through his hair, immensely tired. "I'm not sure. Time to find where I belong."

Leia bit her lip. "Haven't you found that yet? Isn't that what this whole thing was about?"

"That's not what I meant," he corrected. "I know who I am, the people I will be with, what I am, in a vague sense. But I can't stomach the idea of Coruscant right now, and especially not Tatooine. Give me some time," he assured her with that ever so confident smile of his. "I'll pick a nice, pretty spot. Settle in."

"Be a hermit," Han finished. "You'll wind up just like Kenobi….Well, except the dead part…."

Luke laughed. "Looks that way, doesn't it?"

"Oh, don't be a hermit, Luke," Wedge insisted. "Hermits don't get any female visitors."

"I'm afraid Luke hasn't been interested in female visitors for a while," Leia teased, and he turned a deep shade of red.

"Look, it's not my fault you're my sister, I didn't know-"

"_What?_" Wedge had nearly fallen off the log, and his caff had spilled everywhere. "Did I miss something?"

"I'll fill you in later, Antilles," Han promised. "Believe me, it'll screw with your head for a while."

"But you…And she…."

"Anyway," Luke continued, trying not to look at Wedge's fish eyed stare. "I'll be sure to keep in touch. Are you setting up the New Republic on Coruscant?"

"Yes," Leia replied. "I know you don't like it, but maybe without all the Imperial ties, you could see your way to coming for a visit once in a while?"

Luke took her hand, smiled. "Alright, I promise. Unless I find someplace else, I might even be chained to Coruscant for a while." He embraced her before shaking the other guys' hands.

"Take care of my sister, Solo." It was almost a plea, and Han realized he was far too stubborn to ever go beyond that – he was supposed to hate Han, according to four years ago. And they still played at it occasionally.

For Wedge, however, he had an unrestricted smile. "Don't go getting yourself killed," and Wedge grinned back.

"We've had our fair share of close calls, haven't we?"

"But you always came back with me and even saved my hide a few times…I…I really appreciate that Wedge…"

Wedge cuffed his shoulder, the way friends do. "Don't mention it. Just take care of yourself, alright?"

"Oh, I meant to give this to you," Leia quickly added, handing him a small box. "It's a little vid link, you can hook it up to your com. I found it in surplus in the storage room they had below that bunker he blew up. I thought….if you were going away for a while…I could still see you this way."

Luke thanked her shyly, handled the thing carefully, and wondered where he'd be when he first used it. And with most of the other temporary goodbyes given, he eventually climbed back into his X-Wing, and took off.

But he was no more than a quarter of an hour off when he got the strangest com in probably his whole life; there was a sudden, quick beeping, a small red light flashing, and half expecting it to be Leia, he turned on his com link.

"Skywalker, how could you!"

His jaw nearly hit the floor, and he could hear Artoo buzzing at him to at least switch to autopilot if he had to talk.

"M-mara?" he stuttered. "How did you-"

"Answer my question first!"

Well, there was some welcome. But he'd known Mara since she was four, he ought not have been surprised. He clamped his jaw for a second, and firmly growled out, "I'm not sure what I'm answering."

There was a difficult pause. "You killed him."

And Mara could only be referring to one "him." He sighed, and did switch to autopilot at the droid's behest. "No, that was my father. I was there, though, if you particularly care about that. Unconscious," he added almost as an afterthought, "but there…."

"Your father?" she stumbled over the words, and Luke felt that heavy pressure on his chest, rubbed at his temples with his hands in desperation.

"I can't handle this right now. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to go back to flying my freaking ship, if you have a problem with tha-"

"Wait." She sounded…almost reasonable. As reasonable as she ever got, which wasn't much. "Wait, this…this wasn't how I wanted to start this out."

"You've got a lot of nerve," he growled. "Calling me after two years to berate me for something I didn't really do. And another thing, how the hell did you get my communication link number?"

"You didn't think you were the only one who could hack a code now and then, did you?" He could hear the reprimand in her voice. "A few hours and a lot of desperation will get you anywhere."

An idea struck. "Hold on a second," he told her. "Do you have a vid link?"

"Yes…." she responded cautiously.

"Turn it on, I want to see if this thing works." He hooked up the little disk, and flipped it on. Well, it was grainy and a bit unsteady now and then, but it certainly worked – for there she was, flowing, wavy red hair and slight scowl. She looked a little older, but that was to be expected with two years. She hadn't changed much, really. "Now," he sighed, "let's start at the very beginning: What's going on?"

"I…" She faltered. "I got a…request from Palpatine."

He leaned in. "Go on."

"No, we're not getting into what he said, but he's gone, and I know you had something to do with it."

Luke paused a moment. "My father did that. And now my father's dead, too, does that help your hell bent vengeance?"

"I am not hell bent on vengeance!"

"Then why are you calling me?"

"Because! Because we used to be…I needed answers, and you did used to promise me you'd listen when I needed to talk."

He blinked, seemed to inwardly collapse. "That was a long time ago. Things change."

"Then don't let us be one of them," she begged, and it caught his attention. "Please. I need this from you."

He leaned in again. "I'm listening."

She paused again, tried to decide what to say next. "Your father's dead?"

"Yes."

"And…and you're not-"

"No," he answered calmly. "I'm not the emperor. I told you that much. I kept my word."

"Oh…" she whispered. "That makes the rest of this difficult."

"How so?"

"Because…" she bit her lip, and Luke had a strange feeling about the whole thing. "There was someone I was going to introduce you to."

"Mara…." he said warily.

"Give me a second." And she left momentarily only to bring something back with her.

Someone, actually, and Luke really couldn't breathe for a good ten seconds.

A small person, a…a _child_, sitting in her lap, clinging to her in slight confusion while she dotingly brushed his soft hair back and kissed his cheek – and the look on her face was one Luke had _never_ seen before. Not that he could really look at her, as his eyes were focused on the thing in her arms.

"Who's is…who's is that?" he stuttered, breathless.

She glanced coyly at the screen, at her height in power and manipulation. "His name is Ben Skywalker," she said, proud and defensive, and the breath was knocked out of Luke again. She was suddenly struck timid, struggling for a moment. "Those stupid nuns wouldn't let me get out of bed for a few days, so I had ample time to do some research. And since all you talked about when I last saw you was that Kenobi of yours, I thought…."

"He's…he's mine?"

She carefully nodded, turning her squirming son to face the link. The shy creature continued to have his arm about his mother's neck, burying his face in her hair. "Why don't you say hi, Ben?"

"Hi," Luke said breathlessly, trying to comprehend what was happening.

"Hello," the small thing responded, an obvious introvert.

Luke's focus shifted back to Mara, momentarily indignant. "How…how _dare _you not tell me that I'd fathered a child?"

"And what was I supposed to do?" she demanded. "Get in touch with the Rebellion? Point him out to Darth Sidious? I don't think so," she snarled, holding the boy close to her. "His life wouldn't have been worth a credit for all that. No, I did what I could, now how about a thank you or something?"

Luke gave in to that, he could admit to being wrong. "Alright, alright. I'm sorry, I jumped the handle, but I…It's all so new and different…Does anybody know?"

She shook her head. "Except those nuns back at the Sisterhood of whatever their weird goddess' name was. But they're in the Unknown Regions, they're outside the Empire. Or Republic. Or whatever it is you've got up now."

"I wouldn't know," he sighed, resting his head in his hand, amazed. He finally looked at her eyes, whose greenness he could see despite the hologram. "You look tired, Mara."

She flushed. "You're not exactly alert yourself. But thank you very much if I haven't been working hard to keep your son safe. I was visiting him back at that Sisterhood where he was staying. They said the goddess had told them something was happening, he needed to leave, so I…Well, I took him with me, but I wasn't sure where I was going to keep him after that."

"Where are you now?" he asked, bringing up his map.

"Felucia," she replied. "After Palpatine's last message, I…wanted to park and wait to see how things blew over."

"Stay right there," he stressed, changing his course despite Artoo's buzzing. "I'll be there quick as I can. I…."

And they didn't know what to say after that, and so Mara had to default to her customary acid. "So, you've won this little revolution of yours, have you?"

"Now don't be a sore loser, Mara."

"Have things really changed? Are you reinstating the republic?" And then she struck the point she was really asking. "How are things with you and _Princess Organa_."

Luke faltered for a moment. "It's not like you think."

"On the contrary, I believe it's very much like I think."

"No, because, you see…." He was almost going to enjoy the irony of this. "She happens to be…my twin sister."

There was a long moment of silence after that. "Come again?"

"Crazy isn't it?"

"You don't _have _a twin sister."

"You'd think that, wouldn't you? No, she's it alright – amazing, I know."

"You mean….you were hitting on-"

"I was _really _hoping you'd forgotten that."

Quite straight faced, she added, "You have a lot of explaining to do."

"Yes," he leaned back in his seat, watching the pair on the screen with a keen pleasure. "Yes, well, all that in due time. I think I…I think this will all work out quite nicely."

"It'll make a nice change, won't it? We never worked out for a happy ending, did we?"

He watched her with a look of utmost repentance in his eyes, and after a moment, she couldn't meet his gaze. "I never loved you as well as you deserved. I don't think I knew how. I maybe never will."

"Just love me – I don't ask for well or long or anything, I just ask for it."

"And that's what I can promise you."

And breathlessly she had to ask, "Where are we going to?"

"I'm don't know. Home, I think."

"Home? I'm not sure I know where that is."

"Don't worry. We'll find it. I can promise you that."

And she believed him – that was that.

**The End**

_Yup, just as it says up there: The End._

_Wow._

_It is a year to the very day (how ironic) of WAIGT's first birthday. It's so much to believe….It's really amazing, and there's so many things I want to say but don't know how – but I do know that you all made it possible. Without your wonderful nagging and support, I wouldn't have made it past the prologue. This fic wouldn't be nearly as grand as it is now; not as much scope, not as much depth. I'm immensely proud of its success, and I thank you all from the bottom of my heart._

_Bear in mind, it's not really over. WAIGT will never truly be over. I'll continue posting sidelines, so keep your eyes on "Where You Were Going To." I'll put up more snippits of Luke's childhood, and Mara's pregnancy by popular demand. I'll even continue updating this in a way – I'll still respond to reviews and give people updates on…_

_The website._

_Of course, that's precarious. Basically, I'm willing to go out and buy a domain name, but, once again, I'm really going to need people's help. I can do some basic frame layouts, but I want this site to look good, so I'm asking for anyone with a talent for html-ing to please e-mail or message me. Artists would be nice, too, as I'd like to put up some pictures on the sight to make it look a little nicer, and maybe do a web comic of the fic in the future. I'd be selling t-shirts, holding contests with prizes, that sort of thing. The work would be volunteer initially, but if I can get this going anywhere, I might be able to give you small amounts of cash, depending on sales and on donations. But anyone interested in helping me with the layout, with the content, with ANYTHING please contact me. I can't do this if I don't have help, there's too much for me to do already. So, please keep that in mind._

_I don't think there's much more to say than I'll be taking a brief respite from Star Wars only because I promised my friend Hanna I'd work on a down fic I had after I finished this. But after that, it's straight into my next big fic, which I think you'll all like even better than this one. So if you liked this, keep your eyes on me for the future, there's plenty more to come._

_And that's really all, I guess. Just know that I love and appreciate you all and that none of this would have been possible without your support. Please feel free to e-mail and message me at any time, I'll always respond. Much love, many kisses, yours – Shadow13._

Myotismon13: Thank you very much, I'm really glad you loved it.

Schnickledooger: Thank you so much! You've been there since the beginning pretty much, and that's awesome!

HermioneSkywalker: XD! A prequel? Seriously? You all really want me to write one? I don't think it would be very interesting, but I'll seriously keep it in mind if you're all demanding one….

Relyan: Wow, I'm really touched I could move you that much. Thank you.

Stephanie C: I hope Mara didn't disappoint too much.

Jessica -Angel- Skywalker: Thanks much, here's the last of it!

Madame Naberrie: Thank you very, very much. Your reviews have been wonderful.

Jedi X-man Serena Kenobi: Thanks so much!

Ledagirl321: You're all so anxious for Mara and the end, and suddenly you don't want it. How comical. But thank you very much.

Princess-Aiel: -bows- Oh, thank you so much!


End file.
